#wisdomoksori

[morningswan]

I'm writing Damian angst, the Christmas spirit is definitely here.

It's basically how Dick upgraded from grayson to Richard. The way Damian shows love. And some other stuff.

Small fragment of what I wrote.

He didn't understand his father at first. He was cold in every way his mother was warm and warm in every way his mother was cold. It was confusing. What got him praise in the League got him angry looks at the Manor. He hated all of his "brothers", the ones who would take his place in the family, the ones who knew his father and how to please him. They got the praise, and the teaching, the sparring, and the father and son love Damian graved so much. While he got nothing.

Damian had expected to get there and everything be exactly the same as the League. He didn't know his father didn't know about his existence. He didn't know they didn't kill. He didn't know how to earn their love. Everything he had ever been certain about was suddenly wrong, horrible, and inhumane.

[morningswan]

A small part of the 21 chapter of my fic "Who's afraid of little old me?"

Damian pov

Damian hated his blood, for all it took from him. He hated his past and despised who he used to be. His mother loved him, Damian knew it, it would be easier if she didn't, it would be easier to forget the pain and the lies if she had never loved him. But she did. She just loved him all wrong. It was because of that love that she made him bleed while training, why she would punish him, so that his grandfather wouldn't be the one to do it, because that would be ten times worse. It was why she was so harsh and why her hits hurt more than anyone else's. It was why Damian wanted to hate her. But he didn't. He just wished she loved him better, kinder and softer. Like how Richard loved him. Or Todd. Damian wanted a mother, not the daughter of the demon. He wanted something she could never give him. Maybe that's why she sent him away. Maybe it was never about his safety, but his happiness. She might not see his brothers as part of his family, but she knew they would love him.

[morningswan]

I wrote my story "Who's afraid of little old me?" Inspired by the Taylor swift song of the same name but I just realized, it's not that song, it's haunted by also T Swift that embodies this fic. At least the part where I'm at right now.

The song might change, but it will always be one of her songs. That I'm sure.

[morningswan]

Some superbat, because the world deserves it.

- I thought you would be coming in from the window. - Bruce said, without turning around.

- I like to keep you on your toes. - Clark smiled, even if Bruce couldn't see him. - Dickie called. They are all worried about you B and I am too.

- I don't want you to be worried, but I can't seem to be able to do... anything.

- That's because you are trying to do it alone. - Clark placed a hand on Bruce's cheek with love.

- I'm talking about going downstairs to eat or just eating, not about crime fighting. I'm not doing that anymore.

- I know. And those two things can be just as difficult as any other. If you can't go downstairs, I'll carry you. If you can't eat, I'll make you a protein shake. If you can't brush your teeth, I'll hold your hand while you try. These aren't small things. And nothing is too small to ask for my help to do it. - Clark held Bruce's face with both hands, B closed his eyes and cried silently. - Let me help you. That's what I'm here for. These wounds Bruce, they are just as painful or more as the physical ones. And they need your attention to heal. We can do the healing together.

- You'll be here? - Bruce asked unsure, scared of being so vulnerable with another person and scared for feeling so tired that he couldn't do it on his own.

- Clark Kent will take a few days of from The Planet and I'll ask Kara to cover for Superman. Unless the world is ending, I'll be here. With you.

- I assume you still won't kiss me, right?

- We'll have plenty of time for that when you feel better B. I won't go anywhere.

"Who's afraid of little old me?" By wisdomoksori (me)

[morningswan]

Chapter 10, some John Constantine and Dick Grayson interaction.

Just so you know, they just got the basement of a church where the found a ton of kids almost dead.

- Bloody hell... - John said, surprised, even if he had suspected it, he had tried to remain hopeful. It never used to work out that well for him. - We don't have a lot of time, the pastor is possessed by some demon, I slowed him down but he is going to be here in any moment.

- What do we do with all of... this?

- I'll open a portal to a hospital, you'll take the kids through it and I'll take care of this. - John tried to smile, to take the edge off a little. - Don't worry love, this is just a normal Saturday night for me.

Dick shook his head with a smile, and when John opened the portal, he did as he was told. Once all the kids had been safely transfered to the hospital, Dick had expected John to maintain the portal open for him to join him in the fight. But he didn't even get the chance to get close to it before it was gone. John also made sure the hospital was far from the church so even if he tried to get there in time to help, he wouldn't be able to.

John knew how to take care of himself, Dick knew it perfectly well. But he felt uneasy leaving him alone. John had tried to seem carefree and chill but Dick was the son of a detective. And as a proud bat, he knew John was scared.

That's why it wasn't even a question when, as he ran as fast as he could, Dick called the Batcave.

- Nightwing? What's wrong? - His dad's voice came through the comms.

- John is in danger I need back up, now. I'm sending his coordinates to you. - Dick screamed as he called his bike to drive to where he was standing on the parking lot.

- Please tell me you don't mean Constantine.

- We don't have time for this! His portal took me to the other side of the city and you are closer to him than me. Send everyone you can, please dad. - Dick said, frustrated. He got on his bike and drove to the church as fast as he could without almost dying in the process.

- They are on their way. What's the situation? - Seriousness filled Bruce's voice, it didn't quite sound like Batman, but it was similar. It dawned on Dick that Batman was truly done.

- Child sacrifices, the pastor is possessed. John said the demon was powerful, he seemed uneasy, I don't think he is strong enough to fight it.

- Alright, they are almost there.

- John's last location was the basement.

[morningswan]

I just posted a chapter of my story, so here is my favorite part of it. From John Constantine pov.

It seemed that's what he meant everytime he said he wasn't a hero. John Constantine truly wasn't a hero, he was just a man. A powerful man who made too many mistakes and tried his best to make amends. He would sacrifice himself for the world, he had done so many times. But he would never stand by and let Dick do it. He would destroy the very world he tried to save for Dick. He would kill hundreds and torture thousands for his love. He wasn't a good man and John knew it. He had tried to warn Dick before, he had tried to tell him he wasn't good enough for him. To John, being good was a choice he made everyday and it cost him everything. To Dick being good was just how he was. There was a place secured in heaven for him, John had checked. And unless they failed and Nergal took hold of Dick's soul, that's where he would be spending the afterlife. John couldn't die, but if he could, hell was waiting for him. He would continue to con his way out of it, but if it ever came down to it, he would choose hell over Dick's pain any day.

[morningswan]

Bruce having a nightmare, I love this one.

Bruce closed his eyes, trying to fall asleep. In a few moments, the dark from his closed eyelids turned into the dark of his mind. Falling asleep hadn't always been easy for Bruce, but for the last few days, sleeping was all he did. And whatever dreams he could have had been elusive enough that he didn't remember them. But that wasn't the case of this night.

It started with Jason's death, like most things did. When his heart had been truly broken and there was nothing, not even Jason coming back, that could bring light to his life again. This time, he wasn't rushing to get to him, this time he was right there. Watching as the Joker tortured him. Watching as Jason crawled trying to escape, and how the hope left him when he saw the bomb. Bruce watched as Jason's mangled body got up, like a zombie, and screamed at him it was his fault. Jason was right, it had been his fault.

The next one to die was Damian, by the hand of his grandfather. By his sword. Blood was pouring from his abdominal wound like a river falling from a cascade. Damian took out the sword and wielded it, pointing it to Bruce. "It was your fault! It should've been you!" He screamed. He was right. Damian stabbed him and twisted the sword, like it twisted his heart.

Then came Tim. Murdered by his parents. And Bruce had been too late to stop it. "YOU SHOULD'VE SAVED ME! YOU SHOULD'VE BEEN HERE!" But he hadn't been there, he had never been there when Tim had needed him. Tim's hands went up to his neck and squeezed as hard as he could. His face was red and he tried to gasp for air, but didn't fight his son as he killed him. He deserved it anyway.

Cassandra came next. David Cain and Lady Shiva had gotten to her, and Bruce had promised her to keep her safe from them. When Bruce found her body, there wasn't a part of her that wasn't broken or bleeding. Her zombie body could barely walk with her legs and feet destroyed as they were. It didn't stop her from using her mother's knife and cutting off his heart. She held it in her hand and squeezed it, blood pouring, like she had squeezed a sponge. Bruce fell to his knees, and Cassandra kicked him off the edge of the cliff.

Lastly came Dick. The blackness of his mind changed, and soon he saw himself sitting on his son's chest and hitting his face like a mad men. Dick's face was so swollen that he wasn't recognizable anymore. That didn't stop Bruce. He kept screaming at himself to stop, but nothing would make his hands slow down. Just the life leaving Dick's body made his fist fall to his sides. And a crazy smile filled his face. A Joker kind of smile. He laughed and laughed and laughed. Dick's body didn't get up like the others. But that was okay. He didn't have to tell him it was his fault. Bruce had killed him with his own hands. And the rest of his children, he might as well had done the same. It had all been his fault. His hands were bloody anyway. His children weren't safe as long as Bruce was alive.

His children weren't safe.

He was a danger to them.

He would killed them. He couldn't stop it.

They needed to run.

"Who's afraid of little old me?" By wisdomoksori (me)

[morningswan]

Info dump about my own fic ahead, if you are of the few people reading it and don't want to know what it's going to happen, don't read(?

Okay so, I know how the fic is going to keep moving. I was in a stump, but then, going home I my car with my boyfriend while singing/screaming The way I loved you by Taylor swift, I got an idea. As always, Taylor is a great muse.

So, Dick is going to keep away from John for the most part, ofc some drunk phone calls are going to happen they are both very messy bisexuals.

Dick is going to be sad out of his mind, and sicking comfort in his bff. Wally. The guy who had a crush on Dick since forever, something that they both knew, it was obvious, not a secret. No one takes advantage of anyone btw. But, Dick IS lonely. And Wally is right there.

So they make out and it starts getting bigger and bigger and eventually, they are together. And Wally is perfect, he is the perfect boyfriend. Yes, he is late almost always. But, he get along with all his family, they love him. He talks science with his dad and his brother Tim. He dodges knifes with Damian. And he talks explosives with Jason and Roy. He listens to Dick. He loves him. They don't fight, they have nothing to fight about. They kiss softly. They fuck kindly. And Dick feels nothing. He loves Wally, he is his best friend, and he thought he could be more. He thought he would be the one. That John was in the past.

But one drunk phone call from John, asking him if he had truly moved on with Wally showed him the truth. Dick wasn't feeling anything more than friendly affection. The rush, the thrill, the excitement, all of it, it wasn't there. The messy make outs. The angry shouting about nothing, just to end up having sex and laughing. It was all John. John made him feel. Truly feel.

Dick wastes no time breaking up with Wally, because even if he wasn't in love, he loved him. And he wouldn't be with him just because, he wouldn't lead him on. He wanted Wally to be happy.

Wally was smart, he always knew whatever he had with Dick, it was temporary. His heart was somewhere else. With John. It hurt, when it ended, but it didn't surprise him. They still had fun, and Wally would eventually find the right person for him. He would marry and have kids. He would the happiest man alive, not just the fastest. Dick would still be his best friend, and their brief relationship would be something he would think of fondly, but nothing more. Until then, it would hurt. And he would get over it.

Dick wouldn't get back together with John tho. John broke his heart, his trust. That would happen when the world came to an end. (Something that will literally happen later) until then, they would just avoid each other. Unless, ofc, they were drunk and not completely able to stop their impulses. After the first 5 times of ending in each other's beds when drunk, they stopped pretending it would the last time.

Again, his family didn't approve of his relationship with John. Mostly because he was drinking, something that just Bruce and Roy truly knew how dangerous it was for Dick. What it truly meant.