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i did it

26th Feb 2021,

i actually woke up to my alarms today after going to bed at a decent time last night, and i had a nap yesterday too!! not only that but my new album is now out and public and i really hope people are able to hear and enjoy it. right now im about to go on a drive, perfect opportunity to read more of With Nails and finally hear the debut Not My God album - im only a year or so late. im also 3 episodes deep into Outnumbered series 2, and im hoping to finish it by the end of today. im sure i can as i have no college work and no music to work on. gunna just try and relax and unwind today... let's see how that goes lmfao. gone on a drive to Bury St Edmunds to take a garage key back, and stopped off at aldi before we left to get a meal fit for a queen (that's me): cheap sugar free energy drink and a pack of cashews, or as i call it, brunch.

currently sat in the car contemplating. shopping is far more stressful than it needs to be, but asda in bury have replaced half their conveyer belt tills with self checkouts. i wish aldi had self checkouts, as i could have paid for my two items and left in two minutes earlier, rather than being stuck behind somebody who spent £200 on a trolley full of shopping. picked up some mothers day cards today, which cost £7 for four sheets of card that will be in the bin after they've been opened. at least i got to admire all the pretty women in asda while mums boyfriend was browsing. the next book i wanna get was on the shelf there (Before She Disappeared - Lisa Gardner) but they didn't have the paperback on the shelf. i need to order a copy of Othello soon for english, but need to make sure i get the right one. sat in the car listening to My Breathing, as per usual. my happy song. the Not My God album was strange and was interrupted by having to leave the car and go shopping. it warrants a second listening before definitive judgements are made, but so far the lead single is the only standout song for me. a couple of people have messaged me shocked that ive released an album out of nowhere, which is the reaction i wanted. just hope that they're able to listen to and like it.

home now, thank god. caught sight of myself in the car mirror and realised how bad my facial hair was growing, which is rather unwanted seeing as im a trans woman, mask or not. shaved it all off now thankfully. what i didn't like was mum's bf picking up "from your son" cards and shoving in my face; he takes parcels in my preferred name and helps me look for a mug with a V on it, he's even seen me prancing around in a skirt. but nobody in my family - beside my eldest neice - can seem to get it into their skull that i am a trans woman who's pronouns are she/her. god, it's so frustrating and depressing!! call me by my birth name, fine, i don't care. but my pronouns are NOT he/him. my pronouns are literally anything but!! call me she, they, it, call me a literal cunt for all i care. just DON'T call me he.

#With Nails #trans girl #transgender #diary #diary entry #photography #aesthetic #dark #academia #dark academia #Skold #Not My God #Fiction

I refuse to apologize for this.

#fallout 4 #baseball bat #with nails #stranger things #steve harrington #the upside down #stranger things 2 #mine #weapon mods

I'm sick and I'm torn between ideas of wondering what the inside of my throat looks like in wanting to cut out the back of my tongue, or wanting to shove something in there so I can't cough anymore.

#Interesting thoughts nonetheless #andi speaks #Maybe some fingers down my throat #With nails #Do like it personal #violence kink