#wtf rowling

[maxdibert]

Are there any canon ships in Harry Potter that you enjoy? I personally think they were all pretty badly written. Ron x Hermione is probably the one I like most - I'm not crazy about them, but at least we have a foundation with their friendship that was shown since the first book. It makes sense that two close friends would fall in love, so I can accept it. But everyone else seems to get together just for the sake of having romance in the story, not because they are a good match.

Ugh, honestly, all of them are just so lame. Every single canon ship in that saga is a total drag. I wouldn’t write a fanfic about any of them even if you paid me, their dynamics are just not hot at all. The only one I can get behind is Grindeldore, because they’re pure angst, toxic yaoi, a doomed pair, and they’ve got that tension you crave, but Rowling doesn’t even include them in the books, she just mentions it later, so… WELL

The rest? Are they all so boringly heterosexual? And I don’t mean “literally heterosexual,” I mean the kind of boring traditional ship that’s predictable, safe, and totally lacking any substance. Ron/Hermione? Snooze-fest. Their dynamic is dull, and honestly, I can’t stand the Weasleys and wouldn’t wish that family on anyone (xD).

Seriously, these couples have no drama, no spice, no flavor, nothing. Lifelong friends who randomly hook up, the protagonist falling for the pick-me girl who literally doesn’t matter until puberty hits and she bends over backwards for his validation, the 30-something nice guy dumping the “alternative” girl who turns into a doormat for love, teenage couples marrying and having a kid before 20, tradwife/tradhusband couples with twenty kids they can’t feed or care for… Rowling is just so bad at romance.

And don’t even get me started on the off-screen canon ships like Neville, Luna or Draco randomly marrying some nobodies, totally uninteresting, nobody cares. I get it, it’s not a romance book and I appreciate that the ships don’t dominate the story, but come on, you don’t need the romance to be the focus, you just need FUCKING CHEMISTRY. None of the canon ships have it. None. They’re all meh. They’re not hot. Imagining any of them romantically is like imagining my grandma in a sexy scene, cringe and embarrassing xD

[princess-from-the-stars]

"McGonagall, Professor — The name is Scottish (Also written as Mcgonigle or McGonegal) and is from the Celtic name "Donegal," which means "the bravest." The "Mc" in McGonagall means "son of." The bravery fits well with her first name, Minerva, the goddess of wisdom and war."

...

You did it again, Rowling. First there's White Bumblebee, then Werewolf McWerewolf, then Black Dog, and whatever fucking else there is! This is just obvious... And ridiculous.

[cinnamonhoney-tea-moved]

Fun Facts about Hermione Jean Granger w/ me feat. Albus Severus Potter

In the Cursed Child... Hermione... Kisses, or well, is kissed, by her own fucking nephew who might I add is also fucking underage— wait, fuck, really!?

[lnkedmyheart]

The hp universe is so messed up.

You teach students how to brew what is basically a date rape drug in school but you can't keep a contraceptive potion handy so that you're not shooting out crotch goblins in the middle of a full blown war.

Imagine the orphan boom because people didn't use a braincell and just popped out babies when they knew anybody could die at any moment.

[behindthealchemist-a]

fantastic beasts was already cancelled but now it’s like extra cancelled. ban the whole thing and it’s merch.

[morganapendragon]

do you ever think about how many students in the battle of hogwarts can see thestrals now? Because I just did and that’s so so sad.

[tough-chick-in-distress]

28/02/2015

Still not over Dobby's Death.

[316pm]

I got sorted into hufflepuff what the hell, i did't even get gryffindor as an option. I don't wanna be a fucking 'particualarly good finder' fuck!!!