x + fortune teller + nine friendship-isms that i noticed except half of them are probably coincidental and also you can see me make progressively bigger stretches as i slowly lose my mind. Fuck with me (but also if you have trouble deciphering my handwriting/seeing it on the background, the alt text has it transcribed)
Okay so several lifetimes ago, I worked as an undertrained school librarian.
My ADHD was undiagnosed, and I was trying to wake up a mostly dusty boring library. The previous librarian died after a long struggle with cancer, so the place needed a lot, and I mean A LOT of attention after the (understandable) neglect.
I busted ass for about a year, figuring out (mostly) how to be the boss of several thousands of books and textbooks, and many dozens of middle school students.
Then the district decided that all the students would be given planners for their homework. The system is Franklin-Covey. And Stephen Covey had some excellent and clearly explained advice on how to get organized.
Which frankly helped save my ADHD brain and my life.
But that's another post...
The framing story he used for the organizational system has been attributed variously to a Buddhist monk and a college professor; and probably more, I'm sure.
The teacher has two large jars on the table, and baskets of rocks, pebbles, sand.
SHe tells the student to fill the first jar.
The sand goes in, and fills it most of the way.
The pebbles fill it the rest of the way.
None of the big rocks will go in the jar at this point.
She picks up a rock and names it: this is your health. Another: This is your family. This is your education. This is your job. This is your community. This is the art you love to make.
How do you fit these rocks in the jar? 🫙
The student says, you put the big rocks in first.
The teacher says, correct! The pebbles are tasks that need to get handled, things like brushing your teeth or buying new shoes when your old ones wear out. They're important but not a big deal.
The sand is like the even smaller things in our lives. Minor distractions or entertainment, nice to have! but if you fill your jar with them do you have room for the most important things, your big rocks? (And this was 25 years ago, the mid 90's, social media hadn't been born yet, the Internet was brand new) Still there was always distractions, major and minor)
The student says, you don't have time for the big rocks.
The teacher says, let's use the second jar. You can name the big rocks as you put them in.
The student says, Family. Job. Exercise. Housework. My church. My friends. My art.
(Because this was the mid 90's, not 2026, the list didn't include Political Activism, but my list in 2026 DOES.)
ALL THE BIG ROCKS FIT IN THE JAR .
Then the teacher says, now take the small rocks, will they go in the jar?
Almost all of the small rocks DO fit in the jar. They fit in around the big rocks.
Now try the sand. And even a lot of the sand will also fit in the jar 🫙!
The teacher smiles when the class goes 'oh!' and brings out a giant glass of water.
"Here, it's important to stay hydrated" and hands it to the student, who's laughing.
The class laughs too as she pours the water into the jar, and THAT TOO FITS.
"How do we get everything done? Put the big rocks in first."
Best ever lesson and image about priorities and prioritizing. Obviously effective I'm still carrying it in my head a quarter century later.
I used Franklin covey weekly planners for over a decade but while effective, they were bulky.
I moved to Moleskine, which were smaller and book sized, and recently to Leuchtturm (which means lighthouse), because the pages don't let ink bleed through.
And I wrote this post because last night I was drawing in the open notes space in my new pink 🩷 Leuchtturm planner, and I drew a glass jar. And then I wrote what my priorities are, and made them into different shapes of rocks.
And then I thought 🤔💭 I might share this idea 💡 with all of you.
Here's my current list of Big Rocks:
* HOPE
* BUILD RESILIENCE
* HANDWORK
* STRENGTH TRAINING
* WORDS
* MAKE ART
* REACH OUT TO COMMUNITY
* DANCE!
* DO MORE PAGAN WORK
* HANDS IN THE DIRT
* TRAVEL
* TEA PARTIES ETC WITH FRIENDS
And I still have some room left in the jar for POLITICAL ACTIVISM and other important things.
But HOPE and Resilience, Words and Strength Training were the first things in the jar.
Because those are what I need the most, to get through this year.
Now my brain feels calmer, I'll eat something, get my meds, and tackle a handwork project.
Happy new year, may your rocks all fit in your jars! 🪨🪨🪨🫙
