How could I celebrate @zelgan-week 2026 without Table Smut?
Well, it's technically Desk Smut, but I digress.
A Zelgan Week Day 3 One-Shot
Written for Day 3: Possession / Weakness, because anyone trying to possess Zelda is a weak bastard, and her hot new husband knows better.
“I found a collection of letters from noblemen around Hyrule, each one outlining proposed terms of marriage.” She stared into the scarlet pool of her wine glass, feeling a flush of humiliation blossom up from her clavicle. “Twenty-seven attempts to buy a princess.”
The sentence settled somewhere in the middle of the table, near the arranged Silent Princesses and warm safflina.
“Buy a princess,” Ganondorf repeated, taking his time with each word, the same way he had with riddles like “Sheikah Slate” and “Divine Beasts.”
“An arranged marriage,” she tried to clarify.
“Arranged outside of the participants’ discretion.”
“Outside of the bride’s discretion,” she corrected him. “I was—am—the only heir to Hyrule’s throne. Whomever I married would rule the kingdom. The inheritor of that role was not a choice I was meant to make.” She looked up again, the frown parked opposite her seat needing no translation. “Are you telling me that royal marriages were not arranged in your time?”
“You mean, did the primitive people of the burgeoning Hyrule Kingdom place their women on the bargaining table? No, darling wife,” he said, placing his knife and fork back in their original settings.
Those r’s were going to be the death of her.