"don't mass reblog/like :/" coward. fool. somebody just went through and liked and reblogged 64 things from my blog in the span of half an hour at most. and i've never felt more alive in my life
This isn't Instagram, my darlings. It's not considered creepy (except by people imported from Instagram and frankly they need to learn the culture HERE before trying to boss anyone around) or weird or particularly distressing. Many of us don't even look at our notifications to realize that you've done it.
And frankly, I put that on my blog to bring me some joy. If it brings you joy too, put it on your blog along with the next fifty posts in the same theme. (If you're reblogging my fics, thank you, I love you 3000.)
Every couple of months I open my phone to “99+ notifications for Tumblr!” and think, odd. I did not post any art today. And it’s always someone who found my blog and went through the past 3 YEARS of doodles and liked every. Single. One.
Sometimes I like to count how many likes it took before they said “fuck it I gotta follow her,” and it makes me kick my feet in happiness.
Did you know that I, award-winning speculative fiction author Natalie H. Ironside, have written like a real book that you can buy and hold physically in your hands? Exciting!
The Last Girl Scout is a dystopian adventure story about queer hillbillies going on a big adventure in the irradiated ruins of Old America. If you liked Fallout or S.T.A.L.K.E.R. or all things American Gothic then I got five bucks says you’ll like this. Plus it’s got lesbians in it &and they are in love & they even hold hands.
The past lies like a nightmare over the world.
Two hundred years after the War when atomic fire rained from the skies and burned the world to cinders, human civilization has had time to rebuild within the burned-out husk of Old America. But the old terrors of the past still persist, and while some work to build a better world, others still dream of reclaiming the glory of the Old World.
In southern Appalachia, political commissar Magnolia Blackadder is sent on a mission into the irradiated Exclusion Zone of Old DC, where an evil that humanity thought it had vanquished centuries ago is waking up and rebuilding its strength. Along the way, she meets a strange woman with terrible secrets and an unspeakable past, and as they forge a bond and brave the terrors of the wasteland together, she learns that some demons are not so easily exorcised, and that some stones are better left unturned.
In this her debut novel, award-winning author Natalie Ironside delivers a new vision of the post-apocalypse, a tale of adventure, terror, love, and that most basic and most powerful of all human desires: Freedom.
“But Natalie,” you say, “of course I want to support queer fiction and read this post-apocalyptic wasteland adventure transbian romance story, but how can I become a part of this true and amazing way?” Well, I’ll tell you!
Buy on Amazon
Buy on Gumroad
Cashapp five bucks to $NatalieIronside and include an email address and preferred ebook file type
Subscribe to my Patreon for a download link (and that’s only $2; call that a bargain. You’ll also get access to all sorts of other shit including my worldbuilding notes and the Christmas special)
Or message me an email address and your X number and I’ll send you an ebook for free; I call that Big Bill’s five-finger discount
***
If you wanna know what other people have said about this amazing and very good hit new novel, fantasy author Dan Shepherd penned this lovely review:
And here’s an interview where I sat down with Fellow Worker Bundnik from the IWW’s Upstate New York GMB to talk about my very cool book in particular and leftist speculative fiction in general:
Come check it out! & I hate to be that asshole who begs for reblogs but my blog got deleted recently and I lost all my followers the which is how I primarily promote my work the which is like 1/3 of our household income I need for such extravagances as “food” and “rent so if u could reblog this post that would be very cool and sexy of you
(Amazing and good cover art by fw @soul-hammer, sneak preview of the lesbians by @neladoesart)
Hey, anyone who follows me and likes good books, y’all should read this one
I still haven’t finished it yet but in my humble opinion it’s fuckin excellent
If there’s anyone following me who hasn’t read The Last Girl Scout and has any interest at all in post-apoc, political intrigue or queer fiction, I’d strongly recommend giving Natalie’s book a try. It’s a compelling character-driven adventure brought to life by it’s diverse and believable cast. Characters come from a wide range of backgrounds- ethnicities, religions, sexualities and genders, all written as natural and integrated parts of multi-faceted beings, neither token asides to check off diversity boxes nor flat caricatures defined by singular traits, but complete and realistic, reflecting the same type of diversity of experiences the real world has to offer. The transbian romance that makes the beating heart of the story is complex and layered, and the queer issues it discusses go beyond the simple “queer pain” narrative that dominates mainstream queer lit, showcasing a broad and diverse range of experiences. The political elements, while a tad heavy-handed at times, weave a brilliant and fleshed-out example of a functioning society where a broad range of leftist views and factions work together towards common goals. Leftists of all stripes might want to give this a read if solely to draw inspiration from the depiction of pan-left cooperation.
In both the personal and political, Natalie repeatedly echoes the theme that while the ghosts of the past may shape the present, they do not define the future- only our choices to move forward do. But those choices are not made in a vacuum, and ultimately moving forward to a future worth having can only come from acknowledging the past, owning up to your sins and making a conscious effort to make amends for the harm you’ve caused.
Also it has spooky draculas and if I haven’t at least mildly intrigued you by this point idk why you’re even following me lol
"what if I've read part of it" if it's a large enough part that you would consider yourself to Have Read It in general contexts, then it counts. if it's not, then it doesn't. only you can be the judge of that, but I'm not giving you a nuance button.
any translations count, but abridged retellings don't
obviously, there are lots of other classical texts out there. you might have read none of these and be an expert on greek tragedy. I'm not judging your classical knowledge so you don't need to tell me all that. I'm just curious about combos of these specific texts and their popularity, bc a post i just saw got me thinking about it
As today is the 50th anniversary of the moon landing, it’s a great time to revisit Dinah from Devon’s memory of this historic event. And yes, still makes me laugh.
shout out to everyone who has any sort of maintenance job whether it's a custodian or a mechanic or a furnace repair person or a pool cleaner or a housekeeper or anything where someone shows up or I go to you, and my shit is taken care of.
Huge fan of when I have a problem that I have no idea how to handle (or no time/tools/physical strength to handle) and I call A Guy who knows how to handle it and they come and handle it for me.
here's two articles about how JK Rowling just posted on X an upskirt photo of Freda Wallace, a transgender woman, after deadnaming her and misgendering her repeatedly online.
The wealthy author escalated a social media spat that resulted in posting a photo from a 2023 event at the Institute of Economic Affairs in
Rowling posted the picture taken from below because the trans woman, she said, was "refusing to debate me."
So in summation; Rowling demanded access to a woman’s time and when she couldn’t get it she retaliated by posting an upskirt image of her and called her fat, and some of her fans even went “I think I can see her genitals”.
She literally went “debate me! Debate me!” Over and over like the grifter she is and when she couldn’t get what she wanted and when “no” wasn’t enough she resorted to retaliatory sex-pestery, posting an image of somebody’s body with intention to shame and embarrass and spawn more waspish tittering from her internet followers.
Rowling is trash and this is disgraceful behavior, in case anyone has forgotten.
She had also claimed Freda "deserved" this sexual harassment because of what she was wearing... You know... The same excuse used over and over to try and justify rape.
J K Rowling committed a sex crime against a trans woman (specifically, violating the Sexual Offences Act 2003)
(1) A person (A) commits an offence if—
(a) A intentionally shares a photograph or film which shows, or appears to show, another person (B) in an intimate state,
(b) B does not consent to the sharing of the photograph or film, and
(c) A does not reasonably believe that B consents.
(2) A person (A) commits an offence if—
(a) A intentionally shares a photograph or film which shows, or appears to show, another person (B) in an intimate state,
(b) A does so with the intention of causing B alarm, distress or humiliation, and
(c) B does not consent to the sharing of the photograph or film.
It was a huge milestone of scientific and technological advancement. (Plus, at the time, politically significant). Humanity went to space! We set foot on a celestial body that was not earth for the first time in human history! That’s a big deal! I’ve never thought about it before but now that I have, it’s ridiculous to me that that’s not part of our everyday lives and the public consciousness anymore. Why don’t we have a public holiday and a family barbecue about it. Why have I never seen the original broadcast of the moon landing? It should be all over the news every year!
It’s July 20th. That’s the day of the moon landing. Next year is going to be the 54th anniversary. I’m ordering astronaut shaped cookie cutters on Etsy and I’m going to have a goddamn potluck. You’re all invited.
PITCH: We call it Moon Day, and then every 7 years when it falls on a Monday, that's an even BIGGER deal and we call that Moon Day Monday and go absolutely apeshit about it (the next Moon Day Monday is in 2026 so we have a couple trial runs first)
Okay. I was on my beloved AO3 and I saw something that made me do a double take. So, now I really want to know…
What is your AO3 user ID?
I’m an OG user 5 digits or less
Six figures baby!
I’m in the millions…
Remaining time: 6 days 10 hours
I’m so curious to see how long people have been on AO3! I know some people have been on there since beta/invite only, but I would love to see what the number is on tumblr!
a lot of people assume psychosis hallucinations are super intense all-consuming horror movie shit like the memes about the hat man or always horrible debilitating things that make you dangerous to be around
but in my experience 95% of my hallucinations are getting spooked by very clearly hearing someone knocking on my door or calling my name from another room or hearing footsteps walking behind me which are "just" my brain recreating the horror of an abusive childhood
i *have* gotten the "bugs crawling all over me" hallucination once or twice though and yeah that one is exactly as terrible horrible as it sounds AUGH
(not trying to put you on blast specifically, you're just a good example to jump off of)
media and pop culture hypes up psychosis a lot as The Worst That Can Happen out of sanism, so even when you try and filter that cultural bias out you still assume it's based on something
when, no, psychosis is actually very simple: it's just hyperactive pattern matching. it's your brain's signal-to-noise ratio being off balance, it's seeing images in random static. it's not always this special uniquely big thing, it's in fact quite mundane a lot of the time.
no one is immune to psychosis, it's not purely the realm of the insane. anyone is one bad night of sleep or one bad case of food poisoning or one bad fever away from being just like me on my worst days.
and this, indeed, is why solidarity with the insane is so important: you, yes you too, are just one bad day from joining us, and no perceptions of being a "temporarily embarrassed sane person" will save you from the oppression of the psychiatric institution.
huge fan of how isolated they kept robby in s2 because like. he doesn't have anyone. he didn't have anyone in s1, he doesn't have anyone in s2. not truly, not really. it's not the literally no one is there type of loneliness. it's the fact that you're surrounded by people, and you're still deeply alone.
even the people that help him or confront him or reach out to him the most, he barely has. dana, who is first and foremost a coworker before a best friend, who had no idea about robby's abandonment. jack, who's admittedly closer, but I assume is included in "no one knows", + is avoidant, often working, and hasn't faced most of his own shit. not truly reliable.
I mean, that scene where robby is grinning and refusing eye contact and not reassuring jack he'll be okay... and jack doesn't even follow him. just leaves. and later, when dana is practically begging jack to at least say something. do something. but jack is also closed off, so it took that push. he didn't even truly initiate the reaching out.
even duke's connection to robby gets overinflated, and I think it suits the narrative much better to view it as it is: duke and robby are not particularly close. it's implied it's a recent friendship, mainly over motorcycles, which is a recent development in robby's life. and robby, over and over, has to practically plead with duke to stay, have the CT for him, and is generally difficult.
robby is grasping to this friendship because it's likely one of the only ones he has, possibly the only one. and eventually, yes, duke softens at the desperation and comforts him, but it's still just... they're clearly not very close. robby is desperate for connection and unwilling to let it go, he's crying out for help, whoever will help.
him and noelle clearly aren't that close, including the fact that she gossips about something personal to him to dana without a second thought. it's not even a want for robby, the comfort of a warm body in his bed, it's a need. he knows he can't be alone. he can't handle it. but he doesn't wanna get close enough to anyone to be abandoned, so he always leaves first.
yana kovalenko, who is one of the people who cut through to him emotionally the most, is a patient. cassie, who also checked in on him and made an effort, is his resident. the vast majority of people that are considered his "support system" are his responsibilities as well, or at the very least his coworkers first, which heavily clashes.
that's why he latches on so heavy to duke, why duke gets through to him easily, even though he's... honestly pretty surface level, and I assume knows very little about robby's inner self, just as everyone else. all he really knows, from that day, is wow this hospital is draining. but that was enough for robby. because robby is desperately lonely and duke is not a responsibility or a coworker. and duke is older, and robby is subconsciously always searching for a figure like that. someone to guide him. a mother, a father, a mentor. anyone.
anyways I just feel like most of robby's relationships, (even heather in s1 and sometimes especially her,) get wildly overinflated. and it does a disservice to his character. one of the core parts of his character that explains many of his motivations are how completely lonely he is.
i’ve been writing robby fics a little more here lately so i’ve been trying to kind of really analyze his character to get it as close to canon as possible. So, I really wanted to share my thoughts & analysis!
“… I think people became uncomfortable with watching somebody that they really put a lot of faith in struggle, and it became interesting to me how much more accepting we are of a bad guy who does occasional good things than we are of a good guy who occasionally does bad things. We put a purity test to our heroes that nobody could pass, but we give a pass to our villains that forgives unbelievable behavior. And that is an interesting American hypocrisy…” - Noah Wyle on Doctor Robby
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I think that a lot of people focus on the negatives of Robby, (Which yes he is deeply flawed, that’s part of his entire arc)
I think that fanon robby, mostly post season two, has kind of been turned into this hateful, spiteful man, and overall just a dick. When yes, he had his bad moments, a lot of them over the course of s2. As I said before, that was part of his entire storyline.
But, I think that viewers have this way of seeing robby through one lens. We don't zoom out enough to see an overall character instead of him in very specific scenarios and dynamics.
To me, one of the of the most interesting things, especially character wise, about The Pitt is the fact that it takes place on one single day.
We’re getting one day of these people’s lives, if this was real life and not a tv show it would be nearly impossible and irresponsible to completely characterize them from that. (Yes, I know that’s like entirely the point of the show, but i feel the dramatics flowing so I'm gonna keep going)
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Let’s talk about Samira
His treatment of her is bad and I HATE it. (my shayla please come back)
There's the reasoning of it, that he completely hates himself, sees himself in her, worse sees his better self in her and projects that hatred and jealousy onto her. There's no excuse for his behavior towards her. Reasoning doesn't equal justification. Let me make sure I make that thought clear.
I feel like I notice a lot of the fandom seeing Robby as a character through the lens of that relationship only. Which is an easy thing to do with how volatile that relationship is!
But, I do feel like it's important to zoom out and see him as his own stand alone character. And, to even see him through the lenses of his other relationships, platonic or romantic. There's so much more to see!!!!
Season one is robby’s most haunted day, the day is already bad in memory, then it becomes presently worse with Pittfest and Jake.
Season 2 is the day he’s basically deciding when, how and where he’s end his life. this is a bad day for him. not a “normal” bad day of working in healthcare. these days are genuinely haunted for him.
Other characters are facing their own challenges and arcs that’s bad for them also but, they are not facing the same things.
In season two, we see multiple characters pull robby aside say things like “What’s wrong with you today?”, “You’re not yourself today.” , "I'm worried about you."
This is not his baseline in season one or two. He is not always this man.
These are the story telling clues flashing in our face telling us to pay attention, this is wrong. This man is suffering and drowning.
It just feels wrong to completely hone in on these days and more so season two specifically. (But like yes, what else are we supposed to do when there’s 2 season which is in turn 2 days? I understand that fully!)
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Now lets talk relationships-
To me, fanon doctor robby has really been turned into this avoidant (which YES he is the most avoidant soul, I’m gonna get there) who borders on an emotional tyrant. sometimes coming across as cruel in relationships. From what I've seen, he seems to be continually described as a kind of “hit it and quit it guy.” Overall, there seems to be a theme of he's aggressive, demanding, and dominant
We know he had a long term relationship with Janey Malloy. We don't have much information on how or why it ended but, we can make the assumption it was pretty amicable. Also, the fact that he not only chose to sick around for Jake, but the fact that Janey would allow that.
At one point in his life it seems like Robby wasn't a runner.
Janey continues to worry about him, asking Jake to make sure she's okay because he's worried about him. Robby has amassed so many people that care about him so much it's almost impossible to agree with the majority of fanon takes.
Next, we see his relationship with Collin’s. He shows her a care that we don't really see him have with everyone. Even at the moments he's not being "soft" with her he has an obvious demeanor change when interacting with her.
But, overall we see him kind of tender hearted with her. He makes a “scary” call with a patient and says it’s on him if it goes wrong, keeping her safe. He listens to her, at time chases her around just wanting to be around her.
He even panics and asks dana why Collin’s doesn’t want to talk to him. Asking What's wrong and what he did?
Like I said he’s known to be this avoidant guy and there’s a ton of truth in that. Most of that is attributed to his depression, isolation and grief (as is his entire character arc) but, also we see him desire a relationship with Collin's. For connection still, in the same way he says he still has Janeys number saved in his phone.
It could maybe be assumed that Robby wasn't always avoidant.
He was abandoned by his mother at a young age which could've made him much more anxiously attached in his youth, not always avoidant. (please bear with my analysis and the psychology of it all lol I only know the few things I know.)
For young men, mothers are usually the first people who they identify emotional safety with. Being abandoned by said mother would put that part of him into fight or flight constantly, giving him a very disorganized attachment style. Probably either anxious attachment, avoidant attachment or both. Especially since we can infer that he never got any mental health even when he was young.
Back to Collins, the ambulance bay scene between them is very important. She in less words, basically tells Robby she accidentally got pregnant during their relationship and chose to abort it. - From his conversation with Samira in season two, we know he wants children and a family.
But, during that conversation with Collins he shows no anger or resentment towards her. Comforting her, telling her that "the guy" would forgive her. His jump to comforting her is immediate. The main thing he actually expresses is that he wishes more than anything he'd forgive herself.
Next, his relationship that’s shown with Noelle is brief, But we can always analyze!!!! This is the only relationship we know of taking place in season which is his “worst” season emotionally. He’s depressed, trying his best to leave for his suicide quest and not break down before then. HE'S SO KIND TO HER - which yes bar is in hell but work with me.
Now yes, he does kind of “leave” her. but it’s implied that they discussed it and they weren’t serious (L robby), and he does invite her to go - whether that was a super empty offer is up to the viewer to decide. (To me, it was obviously a throw away offer but I'm including it anyways) He then tells her it’s not her fault and actually tries to make her believe it.
He even he drops by her desk and pretends to tie is shoe so he can talk to her. Thats a kind, dorky man thats screaming for connection.
Even in his avoidant attachment, he does actively work in relationships to not hurt his partners. - which cannot be said for everyone. (As a chronic avoidant myself TRUST. ME.)
In some situations, more so Collin's it seems almost like he's the one being pushed out more than he's the one avoiding. - which picking partners like that is also part of avoidance and "punishing" yourself for wanting a relationship. - speaking from an avoidant's perspective so that may not be true for everyone.
In a conversation Noelle has with Dana, she mentions that Robby sleeps with the TV on. That tells us along with everything else that he's genuinely petrified of being alone, especially with his thoughts. He can't take it.
Robby isn't emotionally unavailable because he doesn't care. he cares too much.
Now, let me make it clear that I'm not saying Robby would be an easy partner to have. HE WOULD NOT. He handles his emotional turmoil sometimes by pushing his negative qualities to the front. In turn, sometimes hurting others. It's wrong and frustrating and a bad coping mechanism but that to me is entirely different from being mean for just sake of being cruel.
I also think fanon has a tendency to grab onto his personality of being chief and push that into his intimate relationships. which I'd argue makes a case for my thinking - He has to be on so often and so strong at work that it'd make sense for him to be much softer within a relationship. Still quick to anger and frustration, but in very different ways. (also yeah I'm a hypocrite talking about fanon stuff and then immediately doing the same thing. all love!)
We can even see this with his friendships (or non-canon relationships based on your shipping headcanons). He yell in conversations with Jack and Dana and then almost immediately after crumbles.
Robby also is actually very accommodating. During the Collins conversation he could've turned it on himself, got upset, and centered his hurt.
Same with Noelle when he explains that his "running" has nothing to do with her.
Honestly, same with Jake during the conversation when Jake expresses his anger towards him for Leah.
Professionally and emotionally he takes on responsibility and pain for people all. the. time.
He's willing to absorb blame and carry it for everyone, romantic, platonic or familial alike. Which leads to his arc in season 2 where he ultimately gets to the end of his rope and has no where to put all this stuff.
The Pitt to me seems to be a show that wants to show the best and worst of people. They’re showing you how a fundamentally good person, who dedicates themselves to helping others can become completely unrecognizable due to grief, trauma and depression but that doesn’t make them a bad person.
soooo thank you so much if you actually read all this <3 idk robby is just my fixation right now and I love him (it is probably because internally I got my own thing? Undoubtedly!) but thats neither here nor there! Please feel free to share whatever thoughts you have !
Funeral directors. The man is so behind on charts that death certificate are not getting signed in mass. I stg if i have to call one more Doctor's office to get a signature for these people i will personally go over there and fight them
i think this might be one of the funniest things you've said to me. just for you we should have one hour in season three where a funeral director won't stop harassing robby for a signature on the release of a body so they can bury/cremate the damn thing
