It's basically the story of my life on the Internet. I see something, I get mad, and I RAEG. This is the latest attempt, in all of my previous attempts, to shunt all that RAEG into one place | Tariq K (yeah, please don't pronounce it like you're being strangled or choked) | Malaysian Malay Muslim Male (cisgender) | he / him / his | t minus 1981-W45 | Selangor, Malaysia
I was called out, linked here. I think it's a fairly important read, especially for more vulnerable folk who might fall into the orbit of Woke Dudes What Have Good Politics™, and the kind of toxic power dynamics that might occur in such interactions.
Just to clarify: I don't think OP is wrong, and I do not condone any sort of behavior where you go and make trouble in their space.
I want to say thanks to all the folks who've pointed out my hurtful behavior and all who've checked in with me since the call out. My behaviors are a life-long work in progress of learning and doing better.
To those who have felt unsafe from the behaviors I've displayed, I sincerely apologize for the fear and uncertainty I caused. I'm going to be working on my personal boundaries and behavior as I never want others to feel unsafe from me. In whatever you do, I hope you stay well and safe.
The rest of this post is under the cut to spare the dash.
I've been taking some time off and will continue to introspect and work on some of the more toxic behaviors that have been been pointed out to me. And I'm focusing more on stuff related to family, my day job, and trying to survive this whole global pandemic thing.
I don't expect easy or fast results, truth be told, but addressing toxic habits and behaviors is something that I expect I'll have to work on all my life. Off the top of my head, I can see the implicit need for assumed emotional labor and some of my messed-up expectations with regards to the line between platonic and romantic attraction that need to be addressed, as well as respecting and honoring boundaries between me and others, specifically between folks younger and more vulnerable than me. These aren't easy or painless lessons to have, but they're vital, and I hope to keep doing and getting better.
I've said it once, and I'll say it again: If you've been subject to any of my toxic behavior and have been made to feel unsafe or threatened, I'm sincerely, deeply sorry that I have made you feel this way. Intentional or not, it can be painful to realize that someone you trusted may be unsafe, and doubly so if you have had a history of trauma and abuse. I'll be working on trying to unlearn the toxic behaviors and expectations that caused this, but I don't expect anything more from you, other than you be safe and well for you and those you care about.
Another reiteration: I really want to thank the people who have reached out to me, for urging me to fight the executive dysfunction caused by my anxiety when I first learned about the call out, to bury myself in work and avoid this topic altogether. In facing the callout, I've had time to listen to the people affected by this who spoke up, and have had time to reflect. I hope I'll find ways to be better.
For those who reached out, I know how often this act is a thankless task with uncertain pay-off, but the fact that you believe that I can do better means a lot to me. I'll try my best to live up to your expectations.
If you took the time to read this until the end, thank you for your attention. Stay safe out there.
hot take: the capitalist cultural construction of “humans are naturally greedy and self-centered” is just an attenuated version of the feudal christian construction of “humans are inherently sinful”; both are designed to make people internalize cultural problems and externalize morality.
wait, what was that? creepy men are saying rape culture is natural? white ethno-nationalists are saying humans naturally organize into ethnic identity groups hostile to those unlike them? abled people are saying that humans naturally ‘abandon the weak to die’? what could it all possibly mean?
my favorite thing about welcome to night vale is how FAST it goes from “funny-cool” to “fucking creepy”. best example i can think of is in the episode ‘homecoming’ at this part
like the sudden jarring “wait what” is always omnipresent i love that so much
The Burnum Burnum Declaration England, 26th January, 1988
I, Burnum Burnum, being a nobleman of ancient Australia do hereby take posession of England on behalf of the Aboriginal people. In claiming this colonial outpost, we wish no harm to you natives, but assure you that we are here to bring you good manners, refinement and an opportunity to make a Koompartoo - ‘a fresh start’. Henceforth, an Aboriginal face shall appear on your coins and stamps to signify our sovreignty over this domain. For the more advanced, bring the complex language of the Pitjantjajara; we will teach you how to have a spiritual relationship with the Earth and show you how to get bush tucker.
We do not intend to souvenir, pickle and preserve the heads of your 2000 of your people, nor to publicly display the skeletal remains of your Royal Highness, as was done to our Queen Truganninni for 80 years. Neither do we intend to poison your water holes, lace your flour with strychnine or introduce you to highly toxic drugs. Based on our 50,000 year heritage, we acknowledge the need to preserve the Caucasian race as of interest to antiquity, although we may be inclined to conduct experiments by measuring the size of your skulls for levels of intelligence. We pledge not to sterilise your women, nor to separate your children from their families. We give an absolute undertaking that you shall not be placed onto the mentality of government handouts for the next five generations but you will enjoy the full benefits of Aboriginal equality. At the end of two hundred years, we will make a treaty to validate occupation by peaceful means and not by conquest.
Finally, we solemnly promise not to make a quarry of England and export your valuable minerals back to the old country Australia, and we vow never to destroy three-quarters of your trees, but to encourage Earth Repair Action to unite people, communities, religions and nations in a common, productive, peaceful purpose.
Just to add, Burnum Burnum (which means “Great Warrior”) died on the 18th of August 1997, and he was a Wurundjeri and Yuim man. He was also “the first Aboriginal matriculant to a university in NSW” and was an activist, author, actor, rugby player, and member of the Stolen Generation.
He planted the Aboriginal flag on the cliffs at Dover on 26 January, 1988, exactly two hundred years after Arthur Phillip did so.
"The Bi Pride Flag is the only bisexual symbol not patented, trademarked or service marked.” - Michael Page, creator of the flag, who was a volunteer with BiNet at the time of it's creation.
Honestly, I think this is disgusting. It's valid for bi orgs to want more donations and financial support. However limiting who can use a pride flag? And going after small creators (like the original person was??) Is disgusting and horrible. To point of a flag is to be accessible and recognizable. This isn't going to help at all.
When they do this, do they not realize who they're targeting and hurting the most? Bi & queer people. The people they have set out to help are the ones they are directing funds from.
here’s another thread with more information about what’s up with all this from a legal standpoint. it basically says that BiNet probably doesn’t have the money to actually sue anyone, that they’re the ones more likely to be sued because of this, and if they were to actually get money from each sale involving a bi pride flag, the IRS would most likely take away their non-profit status.
all in all, I don’t think anything will actually happen (they already deleted their twitter), but it’s important to call out bullshit like this when we see it. I’m bisexual, but BiNet sure didn’t have me in mind when they pulled this stunt.
As of right now the BiNetUsa twitter & Facebook pages have been deleted but Faith, the person who made the tweets, is digging deeper on her personal twitter account (and doxxing people). There's also apparently backup/fake BiNet accounts being made on Twitter.
Oh and many of the other board members didn't know about this and are scrambling to do damage control.
Rhetoric I absolutely cannot stand and that popular media needs to abandon immediately before I started throwing rocks:
-oppressed people being violent as a response to their oppressors being violent to them is actually the same uwu
-heroes can’t kill the villain because that makes them just as evil and violent as the villain
-“the government blew up civilians and the rebels blew up a military post so they’re clearly the same”
-“bUt hOW cAn yOU cAlL yOUrsELf a PEACE KEEPER iF yOu uSe VIolEnce?¿?? 🤔🤔”
-basically any argument that attempts to dissuade oppressed people from fighting back and acts like self defense and attacking innocent people are the same thing
