PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
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2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
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@tcwholepostinghole
hey unfriendly reminder that if you're going to follow me for my ass, you're following someone who I'Ds as a bi-ace lesboy and considers the whole tma thing to be a new gender binary at best and idiotic at worst
if you have a problem with that either suck it up or get lost, thxxxxx<3
golden sheep
Go sharty, it’s your squirt day
We’re gonna shitty farty like it’s your squirt day
allow me to introduce you the the backspace button on your keyboard
You can find me in the tub. Bottle full of cum.
certified iconic post
Crossover [High-res + Replay]
https://subscribestar.adult/posts/2319434
post-werewolf-rampage meet-cute
round 2!!
is my dick cuter locked up or free??
yes (incorrect answer!)
no (correct!!!)
the same cuteness (slightly less correct but acceptable)
a secret fourth thing (explain?)
now I've made my case, as you all know, and so therefore perhaps some of you have changed your minds and will be correct this time! ^w^
okay I fucked up the wording so yes is locked up and no is not locked hope this helps
ya know what I'm gonna say it. I don't get cages. you're telling Me you're gonna lock it up so I can't put My mouth on it and see what sorts of noises you make? smh
an excellent argument. I think you all should listen to Her
why is the percentage even higher than the last poll what the heck!!
i think the issue is that the more fuss there is over it, the cuter it is
put fried tofu on my dick thinkin it would be fun for a foxgirl. like those weird candy panties but she. she BIT IT OFF. ITS GONE. ALL OFIT
I used to think that with how I was shaped I couldn't wear outfits like this, so here's an appreciation post for how cute and squishy I look in this outfit
Shout-out to folks of all shapes who wear shit like this and made me realize how hot it is and I was being silly 🥰
trying to use my ragtag rogue squadron of mechs i managed to salvage with the help of my misfit crew to take down the evil authoritarian government that rules the heavens but my ace pilot keeps fucking jerking off in her suit and calling me mommy and asking me to be mean to her this is why you never fucking recruit veterans i dont care if shes the most skilled pilot in the whole galaxy i'm trying to topple a fascist regime not have sex with a girl whos also a dog
hi i live in bumfuck nowhere, USA. four women with mosins broke into my house a while ago and won't leave. they've been making me cook three times a day and they've gone through a terrifying amount of liquor i'm going to go broke.
every time i try to set plates on the table someone grabs my ass and they can see me fighting hard not to go to my knees. this is the funniest shit ever to them.
they left one night and i thought good riddance, but they were back before dawn, laughing and boasting about blowing up some railroad track. they cut my landline. not that i'd have called the cops anyway. they're kinda charming tbh.
one of them is teaching me to tie her tichel for her. she already knows how to do it herself so i have no idea what possible benefit this could be to her. the others keep doing the tongue-between-fingers gesture at her.
they speak english by the way, they're from NJ; they just choose not to because they like how lost i look.
i'm starting to think the only card game they know is bullshit. the only stakes they ever play for is the right to walk over to where i'm cutting vegetables, force the knife out of my hand, and bend me over the counter to the enthusiastic shouts of the other three. i wish they'd raise the stakes but i'm too shy to ask.
the partisans living in my house found the guitar in my attic and made me play for them and i was stammering and blushing the entire time and utterly botched it but that seemed to make the experience better for them
if i can't keep feeding them they're going to leave me for another house. i can't bear to lose them. i think i'll pawn my good-for-nothing dead husband's crap to keep above water for a bit. just flour and beans to eat and plastic-bottle vodka, but it'll do.
one of them was shot and now i have to play nurse too. the other three are still going off on their nightly sabotage runs and this woman propped up on my couch obviously enjoys when i cradle her and tilt her head up for water and god help me i love it too but that doesn't mean i know anything about how to keep her alive!
finally starting to learn some Yiddish! and shooed a cop off my property before he could get to my front door.
they were gathered around the radio today as armistice was announced. there were shouts and laughter and tears of joy. i felt cold in my stomach as i contemplated returning to a life without them. my contemplation was cut short by a kiss. and then another kiss. and then four sets of hands undressing me.
they're still here. i thought they'd slip off in the night and i'd never hear back. why am i crying
now that there's no fighting and they're all four sleeping at night, even the injured one is doing more in the garden than my husband god-rest-him ever did. i hardly have to do anything around here anymore except be pretty and let them carry me off sometimes. i think they've taken me in every corner of this old house at this point.
positive pregnancy test and no idea whose it is. might have a small problem.
turns out they really didn't care whose it was and they were planning to keep sharing me anyway, so problem solved. so. i think i might have four wives. ...and i didn't even get a ceremony! unfair
they arranged a little private ceremony, the sweethearts, and on my husband's grave no less. how could they possibly have known that i
...one of you girls is reading this blog, aren't you. that's it! no more updates! i will have privacy!
me: ah nooo i accidentally cut myself. come look at this cut
my haemophiliac friend: you know that's not what it means right?
me: uh oh i ate this necco wafer sloppily and now its all over my lap
my necrophiliac friend: im gonna explain something to you and i dont want you to get angry
My life goal is to become qualified in every form of travel:
I'm already qualified in scuba, I will soon be qualified in powerboating, I'll get a driving test soon, after that I just need to get a pilot's license and I can travel by anything 😎
Oh right yea something something wetsuit idk
