he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
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2012 vs 2023
Rotating clouds above Denver
allure korea ⥠november â15 issue photography by: mok jung wook
Yknow i feel like appreciating jonghyun rn cuz he deserves it
Jonghyun was everything you could wish for in an idol and more. Beyond his talent, no one could talk to him without talking about what a good person he was. He was just that loveable and kind. Jonghyun was always outspoken about mental health, lgbtq+ rights, and inequality. He was often bashed in the industry for speaking out about all those things, yet he did it anyways. He was always the first one to cry, but he was also the first one to laugh. He poured his heart and soul into his music. He suffered from insomnia and yet he always put on a show with full energy. He had a voice that could bring you to tears just by listening to it. His #1 goal was always to be kind and gentle to his fans, to be their friend. And he sure as hell did a good job
missing you (2013)Â
2018
In 2018 people still throwing Spinster around as an insult. On a kpop page. Lmao.
I'm crying because in my mind, I can still hear his voice saying my name.
gaon has released their official charts for the first week of 2018: sunday, december 31st - saturday, january 6th. digital 12. lonely (feat. taeyeon) - jonghyun (â6) 59. í루ě ë (end of a day) - jonghyun (â31) download 12. lonely (feat. taeyeon) - jonghyun (â6) 54. í루ě ë (end of a day) - jonghyun (â15) streaming 12. lonely (feat. taeyeon) - jonghyun (â6) 61. í루ě ë (end of a day) - jonghyun (â20) background music 76. lonely (feat. taeyeon) - jonghyun (â54) mobile 19. lonely (feat. taeyeon) - jonghyun (â10) album 5. the collection [story op. 2] - jonghyun (new) 8. base - jonghyun (new) 30. 1of1 - shinee (â12) 44. married to the music - shinee (â1) 50. the misconceptions of us - shinee (â6) 52. 1of1 - shinee (â22) 62. odd - shinee (â37) 72. sherlock - shinee (â19) 84. ëë ë돴 ěëť (replay) - shinee (â48) 85. everybody - shinee (â42)
january 12th. three years ago jonghyun made his official debut as a solo artist with the release of his first and only mini album, base. the album and itâs double title tracks, âcrazy (guilty pleasure)â and âdĂŠjĂ -booâ, received acclaim both internationally and domestically. the album was a prolific one for sm entertainment as it not only marked the first time that one of their artist promoted double title tracks, but it was: the first album where one of their artists worked on all of the songs featured in the album. it also opened up the doors within the company for sm idols to release songs featuring artists from outside of the company, seeing as this was a very rare happening before this point (with the exception of a few special collaborations and osts, and boa). âdĂŠjĂ -booâ was a digital success, earning jonghyun a top spot on the weekly digital chart on gaon (also a first for an sm soloist) and a spot in the top three on the monthly digital chart. it also earned him eight consecutive music show awards, and his only year end music show award, a bonsang at the 30th golden disk awards in january 2016. base can be purchased on melon or listened to here on spotify. (it can also be found on all other korean digital music platforms and apple music.)
last night, during the second day (physical) of the 32nd golden disk awards, lee hi paid tribute to jonghyun by performing âíě¨ (breathe)â, which he composed and wrote for her. a direct link to the performance can be found here . before the start of the performance a short commemorative video was aired of jonghyun. below is a translation of the dialogue and text within it: on a day an exceptional among of snow covered the world in white, the star that shined the brightest on stage because a star that shines the brightest in the night sky. âwhen youâre comforting someone, rather than comfort them by comparing to your situation or the situations of others, i think itâs best to comfort them about that personâs situationâ. your words were comforting pats to us. âif there are people who are exhausted from reality, as you listen to this song, i hope theyâll know that there is someone here who is like themâ. your music was a warm embrace to us. âjonghyunnie hyung who is the best artist of my life, friend, hyung and colleague - you worked hard. i love you so muchâ - shineeâs key. âiâm sorry i couldnât embrace you enough. i love you and thank you. i miss you a lot and i want to hold your handâ - snsdâs taeyeon. âtrust artist jonghyun sunbaenim, we miss you so much and we love you. we will remember you foreverâ - exo âlife is a continuation of meetings and farewells. because of that process i believe that we grow. immediately, itâs regrettable. sadness and tears come, but we will meet again.â tonight, we say our greetings to the star that is shining the brightest in the sky. you worked hard. you really went through a lot. (last part, sung by jonghyun and implied) you are my pride. (source: sonexstella) [note: the quotations that are not labeled are quotes from jonghyun himself, mainly from blue night radio. the quotes from kibum and taeyeonâs are taken from their instagram posts, and the quote from exo is taken from the message displayed during their concert dedicated to him.]
as of late, iâve had many blingers reach out to me (both through messages on here and through my curiouscat) and based on a common trend that i have picked up on in what they have said to me i figured it wouldnât hurt to make this post. before i go on i want to remind everyone: we all cope in different ways, we all grieve differently as well so how youâre feeling about everything at the moment is not wrong. you may feel better, you may feel miserable. as jonghyun put it: ârather than saying time is medicine i think time just covers things. i donât think it heals you, and if you want to heal i think itâs better to seek some other methods. one think i do think i can tell you is that if time passes you will hurt a little less than you do now.â (source) moving on, what iâm going to start this post by saying is: please be kind of blingers. weâre all hurting, weâre all grieving but thereâs an added layer with us that iâm sure you can all understand. this obviously goes for all shawols as well but this post is for blingers specifically. (death tw) â if a blinger says that they are not ready for the domes or that they think that it is too soon it is not because they do not respect the decision that jinki, kibum, minho and taemin made; it is because they are not ready to see the others standing on stage without jonghyun yet. most that i have spoken to are to terms with the fact that he is gone, but seeing them without him makes it even more real. â talk of comebacks without jonghyun ⌠itâs a very touchy subject for blingers. a lot feel that itâs too soon to be discussing the prospect of comebacks and concerts / touring beyond the domes. i agree with this because itâs only been three weeks and the other members havenât even been given the chance to grieve properly really. itâs true that some blingers may be completely turned off to the idea of shinee promoting without jonghyun in the future and thatâs ultimately their business. theyâre going to feel how they want to feel, but the majority support any decision that they plan on making in the future. itâs just that everything is too raw right now still and likely will be for a long, long time. â this goes along with the above but: blingers who feel like either are not âfake shawolsâ. a few that i know have been called this and it really âŚ, really hurts because that isnât the case in the slightest. the love that they have for the other members is very strong but remember that jonghyun was their #person. â the phrasing of comments about how the group will âcome back strongerâ or that jinki, kibum, minho and taemin are âthe strongest people to ever existâ often sit the wrong way with blingers, due to phrasing and very unintentional implications. jinki, kibum, minho and taemin are incredibly strong and they deserve to be acknowledged for that strength, but jonghyun was strong as well, and shinee was strong as a group with jonghyun. moving forward, theyâll continue to be strong, not become âstrongerâ because that strength always existed. â as said earlier: everyone grieves at their own pace but a lot of blingers feel as if they have been left in the dark (or dust) already. itâs difficult to explain but itâs a very real feeling across the board. (i understand because iâve felt it as well.) â some blingers feel like theyâve backed into a corner within fandom, that they canât voice how they feel about the future of shinee because theyâre afraid of getting attacked. everyone has their own opinions and no one should be made to feel bad for them (unless theyâre offensive). talk it out amongst each other if youâre able. itâs always easier that way. everyone has been sensitive lately and itâs been very easy for misunderstandings to arise in the heat of emotion. â casual conversation that implies that the group can easily go on with jonghyun is probably what has hurt blingers the most. comments such as: âthe entire group is made up of vocalists so they can cover for him pretty easilyâ arenât appreciated because they take on a completely different meaning to what they would have before his death. jonghyun is not replaceable. this isnât the same as covering for a member when they canât make it to a schedule. â please donât tell a blinger (or any other shawol) that theyâve been âupset for too longâ or that theyâre being âannoyingâ because theyâre still grieving. iâve seen this coming from edgy stans in other fandoms and itâs fucked up. a lot are already anxious that theyâre getting in the way of othersâ grieving to begin with by talking about how theyâre still upset when thereâs no timeline for grief, so hearing anyone say that is not appreciated. there are others as well but iâm going to stop there because i figure you get the general gist. be kind to blingers, be kind of each other. none of this is easy and we need to do the best to take care of and be gentle with one another.
Rest in peace, sweet angel.Â
We miss you.
We love you.
when he was so excited he almost sang a lil early⌠áă á âĄ
I hadnt been able to write much since Jonghyunnie left our world. It's been so difficult for me. I followed Jonghyun from afar for the better part of a decade, and he was, to me, the comforting guidance of the moon and the stars. I, too, am suffering with depression, and being quite sensitive, Jonghyun really helped me. I related to him so much, I miss him so dearly and I am so sorry to him.
I have decided to keep this tumblr in eternally loving memory of my beautiful, precious, fragile star.
I am quite sentimental, so since around 2011-2012 I carried in my wallet a folded paper with a poem, because I was so sure one day we would meet and I would give it to him. Little did I know just how tired he was.
This poem is from E. E. Cummings, titled You Are Tired (I think). Jonghyunnie, this I say to you forever.
You are tired,
(I think)
Of the always puzzle of living and doing;
And so am I.
Come with me, then,
And weâll leave it far and far awayâ
(Only you and I, understand!)
You have played,
(I think)
And broke the toys you were fondest of,
And are a little tired now;
Tired of things that break, andâ
Just tired.
So am I.
But I come with a dream in my eyes tonight,
And knock with a rose at the hopeless gate of your heartâ
Open to me!
For I will show you the places Nobody knows,
And, if you like,
The perfect places of Sleep.
Ah, come with me!
Iâll blow you that wonderful bubble, the moon,
That floats forever and a day;
Iâll sing you the jacinth song
Of the probable stars;
I will attempt the unstartled steppes of dream,
Until I find the Only Flower,
Which shall keep (I think) your little heart
While the moon comes out of the sea.
Good night, beloved.