Why do you feel Ted is better for Robin than Barney?
So glad you asked this.
Okay so in terms of just Ted vs. Barney…Ted’s the better guy, no question. His character gets such a bad rep, but the worst things you can say about Ted (he’s “whiny and pretentious”) is nothing like the worst things you can say about Barney (he’s gross and misogynistic and in my opinion there was a point where that stopped being funny and started being just UGH). I think Ted understands selfless love in a way Barney doesn’t. Example: Barney assumed, in his convoluted proposal plan (more on that later), that if Ted told Robin to go to Barney, it would mean that Ted was over her. In actuality, though, that had nothing to do with it, because Ted wasn’t thinking of his own happiness: just Robin’s. That sort of thinking wouldn’t have occurred to Barney.
Ted’s also the guy who just shows up for Robin, time and time again. He’s “the only one she can count on”. He knows her so well, and he can tell when something’s wrong. He set up those Christmas lights and skipped his flight home for Christmas when everyone else left because he knew she needed cheering up…he didn’t even demand to know why, didn’t push, just made the gesture. When she was digging around in the park for that necklace or whatever, Barney didn’t come help. But Ted could tell it was something important, no matter what Robin said, and he showed up without even needing to know why. He’s such a good guy, whether in the context of romance or friendship. He puts Robin first, he doesn’t push her but there’s not much he wouldn’t do to make her happy. I don’t see how that wouldn’t be ideal.
But Ted isn’t some sort of perpetual Nice Guy who is perfect on paper but Robin just doesn’t feel that way about. My favorite thing about Ted/Robin (and something people try to brush off now) is that Ted was Robin’s exception. He’s the one that changed thing for her. The first guy she didn’t take the three exit out of a relationship with. The first guy she said “I love you” to. The first guy to make her consider marriage (“I didn’t say neverI”) or kids (“If I was gonna have someone’s babies…I’d have your babies”).
I’ve said this so many times, but there’s no narrative reason for Ted and Robin not being together other than the fact that the pilot episode, the first thing they ever wrote, made it literally impossible for them to end up together. The only reason they broke up was because they differed on the big issues of marriage and kids. And it wasn’t because Ted wasn’t the right person for Robin to start considering that…all the examples above prove that, along with the actual line she said “I thought if I ever changed my mind about marriage and kids, it was nice to know that you were there.” They were in love, their relationship was healthy and worked really well. But the series made them an impossibility. Technically the reason they aren’t together at the moment is because when Ted told Robin he was still in love with her (when they were roommates), she said she didn’t love him. But to be honest, that was sort of sloppy writing as the “death toll” for those two…she’d literally just broken up with a guy that she’d been considering marrying. She didn’t love Barney at that moment either. That storyline was kind of rushed. The writing was starting to spiral at that point anyway, but that’s another rant.
Hmmm I had more I wanted to say, probably. I’ve never really bought the way the writers write Barney and Robin, beyond the initial “Barney likes Robin” storyline, which I could buy. But beyond that…they just sucked at making it work. It felt like it was based on either a) fan service or b) some out of character idea that they’re very similar, which they aren’t. Robin being a bit commitment phobic is waaay different than Barney’s string of one night stands. The way the writers broke them up after the first relationship was really, really indicative of how impossible it was to write those two together. Then their feelings for each other would suddenly come up again, out of nowhere, whenever the storyline needed it. I also think it makes Robin - once my favorite character - unbearable. She became pathetic and jealous and whiny when he was dating Nora, and she became a total doormat at certain points of her and Barney’s relationship/engagement (strong willed Robin of the early series would never have accepted some of the shit Barney pulled, especially not under the excuse of “I love you means I love all of you, even how gross you are”. Also I can’t even talk about Barney’s proposal…it was manipulative, immature, and borderline cruel bullshit and, again, early!Robin would never have stood for that.
