You take up the most room in my heart.
@tenderbled

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@tenderbled
You take up the most room in my heart.
@tenderbled
♥
click here for a starter my Trashy butt took 38 years to post !
starter for @sungrown ! / * ♥ — hug my muse !
SPLIT SECOND -- that’s all it takes -- a blink of green hues as she studies the streets in confusion , contemplating her need for a MAP , and squints against the harsh sun’s rays. a split second , before the streets are filled to the brim with the groans & growls of the undead eyeing their next meal like predator to prey. delilah SWEARS the place was as empty as boulder county has ever been only a moment prior ; despite a few strays she had come across in her travels , she had never come across more than a dozen max. today? she stopped trying to count after thirty , and more & more seemed to follow in their aftermath ; bloodshot eyes targeting the blonde with a HUNGER , and it’s downright terrifying how fast they move once they find their next KILL.
feet hit the pavement with urgency , till she can fill her muscles tiring & her lungs begin to struggle ; she’s hyperventilating , she can feel it , a chest rising faster than it falls. a PANIC she tries to swallow only to feel it creep back up again moments later --- she’s not fast enough , she’s not strong enough , she doesn’t want to DIE --- her pulse pounding in her ears mixes in with those same groans & growls that warned her of their arrival , now they haunt her with each corner she turns & no matter how far she seems to travel , she can’t drown out the sounds. few times she lets out a cry of frustration as she feels her pace slowing , as she feels herself giving in ( she can’t stop ; if she stops she collapses , and if she collapses she’s a GONER. ) and when she feels herself slam into another figure? human-like & soft , she figures her time has run out.
but then words greet her ears , a voice that is SWEET ; and delilah stops her struggles , in her attempts to push them away --- finds herself wrapping her arms around them instead , burying red cheeks & eyes that glisten with tears into their chest , holding them close. stranger or not , it’s a COMFORT. ❛ i’m sorry , ❜ the words are muffled , choked , and she pulls back just enough to look up at the male’s face with desperation. ❛ i can’t --- i don’t know what to do , there’s so many. ❜ suddenly eyes widen in consciousness , and a hand grips his shoulder in FEAR. ❛ you’ve . . . you’ve heard the broadcast , right ? you need to find somewhere safe , now. ❜
so my friend killed a moth and he kind of just
* mxtilton !
He shifts so Delilah can sit, curling his legs up underneath him. He moves slowly so he doesn’t spill the drink she got him — the perfect start to the day. Once upon a time, it was the perfect start to every day. He took another slow sip, letting the warmth roll down his throat and fill his empty stomach.
It took him a few more moments to fully wake up, but he finally catches up with her energizer bunny attitude. Most days, he can match her stride for stride. But where Delilah talks at a mile a minute, Max hardly talks at all. He gives a small shrug at her ideas for the future, smiling sadly. Starbucks and traffic and bills…
“I hope,” he said simply, hiding his doubts behind another sip. Even if they could find a cure, or a vaccine, or some kind of treatment, Max didn’t think things would ever go back to the way they were. Not with all the people they’d lost. His whole life, only one person had ever been family to him, and she was gone for a long time now. But he had Delilah. He had Claire. “But if our hopes are right, you’re still not getting rid of me.”
delilah is a HOPEFUL person , that you can’t deny when she’s running around dreaming up possibilities about a future that may or may not come true ; she wishes for a promising one , one that isn’t so filled with death & MALICE. perhaps even one where she can have the same things she wanted before ; family -- her own family , an ultimate love , a happily ever after. PITIFUL , some would scoff , because how could she imagine such a life -- a happy one -- when the world was this way? easy , because if she let the darkness of it all drag her down , she would barely be able to pull herself from her bed each morning , she wouldn’t be able to keep fighting. she’d c r u m b l e ; HOPING is the only option she has.
she doesn’t necessarily believe the infected will suddenly disappear , or a cure will suddenly fall into their palms and everything will be SUNSHINE & DAISIES , no , but she finds it easier to pain a picture silly little things that may never happen , than fall apart over a lack of faith. ❛ you don’t have to agree , ❜ manicured fingernails clink against the side of her cup in tune & she lifts her shoulders into a shrug. ❛ i know it’s a stupid thought -- or atleast , most people think it’s stupid. ❜ most people roll their eyes or give their candid commentary on delilah roseberg’s beliefs of a RESTORED WORLD ! at least she’s not one to take things to heart.
❛ no? ❜ lips purse to hide the smile there & she sits up straighter to maintain the serious composure needed for deliverance. ❛ oh darn , i really did hope to finally be rid of you & your infamous life lessons. ❜ it doesn’t take long for the grin to reappear , and a hand comes to wave her words away. ❛ nah , i couldn’t -- you’d miss me too much , max ; and I GUESS i’d miss you too. ❜ no doubt about it.
* cnlydcrkness !
a s t r a n g e feeling of comfort always seemed to wash over the teenage boy when the static of that radio roared to life. there was a familiarity there, someone speaking in a calm manner towards him, even if it wasn’t a specific message. if anyone had ever asked why he had continued to pack that thing around throughout the months of survival, he always told them it was his father’s, something he had left of him, but that was a LIE. It was a beacon of hope for him, but he’d never admit that. this time, though, as the static washed over the serene area around him, there was a sense of p a n i c that seemed to swarm the air riley breathed. a HOARD. It was less than an hour later when he had all of his belongings packed and he began his journey to safety.
for the longest time , there had only been the BUZZ of static as delilah rosenberg tampered with the controls of an ancient radio ; thick with DUST & questionably operable in the first place. BOULDER COUNTY RADIO was been amongst the whispers delilah has been catching over the past few days , a family that keeps tabs on the citizens of boulder county & updates them on the latest news ‘round town ( who knew APOCALYPSE GOSSIP was a thing , huh? ) for the longest time , delilah waited for one of those updates , kept the channel going JUST IN CASE ; buzzing on that false hope & watching the world pass by as the searches for new patrons to rescue on the way back to balfour senior living. then the words come in , a voice filled with WARNING -- warning that delilah intends to take seriously. she’s never been one to question authority , especially when it came with a notice for impending devastation & probable death. ❛ hey --- hey ! ❜ she calls out , taking the stairs two at a time as she hurries down the steps ; the boy is only a few meters off , alive , and delilah can’t help but feel the concern growing in her chest for the stranger. ❛ have you heard the broadcast? ❜ she pauses , hovering on the last step as she awaits his reaction --- ENEMY OR ALLY? either way , delilah smiles & continues on with her offer ( everyone deserved to be saved , that delilah is PASSIONATE about. ) ❛ if you need shelter , i know a place. ❜
* prditflorem !
“see if a dog won’t eat it then why would you? it’s just nasty like i remember when i was younger i would steal it from people just to throw it away. it’s very unhealthy as well” but this wasn’t the time to talk about health or to worry about it no matter how much aster wanted to, there was no way she could go back to her typical diet of fruits and salads and vitamins and all of that was very healthy and made her FEEL good and alive, now with a simple strawberry the blonde girl was happy. “ we don’t have to move on because i mean it hasn’t passed but we can learn to live in it, sure things will never really be as before but there’s still so many amazing things that we can enjoy”. aster would be lying if she said she was never scared, the first few weeks of the outbreak she was TERRIFIED, not knowing if she was going to survive or what was going to happen to pretty much everyone and everything, now a she was a bit more calm about it, she understood that it happened and now she had no other choice than to live in fear or try and live her life as best as she could enjoying every little things. aster couldn’t help but smile at delilah’s little story, she loved learning about everyone and more about people as kind and honestly beautiful as delilah “ nasa has always seemed really interesting, wouldn’t it be scary to go to space though? yeah it would be beautiful but it would be so lonely as well”, aster was now used to loneliness but still the thought of it still made her quite sad.. she quickly snapped out of her thoughts as soon as delilah changed the subject to her sketchbook, handing her the book aster’s small frown that had been appearing suddenly changed into a smile “this sunset, i was thinking of seeing if i could get some better painting supplies and maybe recreate it in a mural inside the camp”
❛ you used to steal from people? oh aster , you don’t seem like that sort of girl. ❜ it sparks a laugh from the blonde ; aster? stealing? JUST to throw it away? i suppose it does sound like her , but it’s hard to imagine aster being SLY when she’s so sweet ---- but then you’d never picture delilah running from the cops because her brother decided to steal their car & go for a joyride either ( you could never seem to catch a rosenberg though , all of them had the cardio from years of running from the badges. ) ❛ you’re right. ❜ she doesn’t say what she wants to say , a moment of hesitance that brings her to smile & say those two words instead of: i prefer it this way , i prefer the way the world ended to the way it was before ---- don’t get her wrong , she UNDERSTANDS how screwed up it is now , every day is a fight to keep surviving & every morning she’s grateful for being given another day. but , somehow she was more fearful of her future before the outbreak than the future she has now. ❛ it would be amazing , ❜ she breaths , eyes glimmering with wonder & intrigue. ❛ imagine just . . . floating through space -- or landing on the moon ! just . . . seeing the earth from all the way up there. ❜ a finger points to the skies before it drops back down to her side ; and she wouldn’t even have to come back if she didn’t want to , she could be one with the stars. ❛ lonely? i suppose it would get lonely. ❜ she lifts her shoulders to shrug ; LONELINESS is something delilah has grown accustomed to over the years , it doesn’t seem to leave that some hollow center ; instead , it’s simply NUMB. ❛ but you could always come with me though. ❜ she gives a playful nudge against aster’s shoulder , smile widening into a grin. ❛ i’d definitely need you around ! you and chester and max and noah. ❜ family is what she means , the people she loves most. it’s completely improbable now though , delilah is just DREAMING of that perfect life. she wonders if the human race would ever go back up there? or . . . who IS still up there staring back down on them? ❛ a mural would be beautiful , ❜ grasping the sketchbook between her palms , delilah begins admiring the art spread out across the page , fingers brushing the edges of paper filled with a girl’s TALENT & mind -- it was a nice thought , delilah adored aster. ❛ you captured it perfectly. honestly? you’re such an amazing artist , aster --- and i’m not just saying that because i’m your friend & i love everything you do ! no , you're just . . . a natural. ❜
ich wünsch dir noch n geiles leben mit knallharten champagnerfeten mit fame, viel geld, dicken villen und sonnenbrillen ich seh doch ganz genau dass du eigentlich was anderes willst
* rosescoloured !
there should be no life in this area of the city and noah’s presence here has brought them nothing but misfortune : this is the fourth time that he and sabrina dejectedly parted ways, split up and find their checkpoint on their own. it doesn’t feel good — every time that noah is not by her side is a knife pressed closer and closer against his throat, nearing to end his life. there should be no life in this area but it sees noah stumbling around, until his attention is caught by something familiar, someone.
he’s surprised by the sight of the blonde in this particular part of the city — so much so that he has to look twice, eyes squinting to see past the bright sunlight that falls on him with gentle caresses. “i —” he’s stopped short as her hands find his, and warmth floods him like coffee in the early mornings after a long day of no sleep and hard work — warmth that, frankly, reminds him of home. “you’re right. it isn’t safe here.” he says and there is not a single second in which he hesitates. noah follows delilah ( he’ll follow her to the ends of this earth if he must ) and tries not to let fear take him so easily.
he gives her a smile, equally as enthused to see her here regardless. “hey, come on, now. that impending doom probably just wants to say hi. it can’t cause us harm if we, uh… maybe stare at really weird.” noah squeezes her hand, “doing ten times better now that i’m with you. and yours?”
it might come as a shock to some , but delilah is a SOLITARY CREATURE by nature ; wandering the streets that boulder county contains alone? feels as routine as waking up in the morning , as breathing. the iowa home where the rosenberg’s were raised was always an EMPTY one --- parents out who knows where & children out doing who knows what --- the youngest rosenberg remembers walking herself to school , tucking herself in bed at night , waking up and falling to sleep to that same e m p t y household. she doesn’t blame them , her family , they had lives too -- they had to support themselves too ; and she doesn’t even mind the cards she was dealt --- after all , it’s made her adjust to the end of the world that much easier. is that SAD? that she doesn’t miss it? does that make her a bad person?
people help too. make the adaption all the easier ; aster and max and ----- NOAH. he’s key , one of the reasons delilah finds the strength each morning & maintain her sanity. he’s got a beautiful soul , as warm as summer nights , and she finds comfort when he’s by her side & a certain SERENITY in his smile that makes her forget , for a moment , about whatever seems to be weighing her down --- he makes her feel light as a feather , he makes her feel better. ❛ i could hear them back there , don’t know how many but we should find . . . somewhere. ❜ she trails off , eyes tracing the street signs & buildings they pass in hopes that something will spark a recognition ; a HOPELESS task , nothing looks familiar and she can feel the uneasiness swirling within her ----- but then he speaks , the way noah lau speaks with words that hold promise & words that seem to swipe away the fear rising to it’s peak. instinct says it’s a dangerous effect for him to have on her , but she appreciates it nonetheless.
❛ honestly? words to live by , it can’t harm us if we’re not afraid , right? ❜ a widening smile & she pauses in her attempt to find safe refuge to match his pace. ❛ that’s such a cheesy answer --- you are such a cheesy guy , noah. ❜ she says it with love & adoration , of course ! it makes her laugh , a hand squeezing his own. ❛ but i’m over the moon now that i’m seeing you , of course ---- what are you doing out here anyway ? where’s your sister ? ❜
* mxtilton !
Regiment, order, schedule. Things Max prizes in his everyday life, even in the not-so-everyday end of the world. He’s a sucker for well-laid plans and adores a good ol’ calendar. The one thing he puts above it all, though, is the chance to sleep in when he can. So waking up to a voice like the bright morning sun made him start— and then groan.
He rolled over, rubbing a hand over his face, happy to see Delilah once he realized it was her. He mumbled some kind of affirmative and relieved her of one cup, propped up on his elbow. Even the smell was divine. He chuckled at her enthusiasm and took a tiny sip, reveling in the heat of it. “You are so right,” he agreed, voice hoarse from sleep.
Max indulged in a few more little sips, letting the warmth of days past seep into his veins. “Mm, thank you. So good,” he said with a growing smile. “While I’d love to see you even more energetic, I am not going to pass this up. You start to forget how nice a little caffeine is, huh?”
she rises with the birds , the brink of dawn and the blonde is already bouncing around the balfour camp with an energy that is unnatural ; it was a habit she acquired prior to the outbreak and it’s a habit that’s been hard to break --- dead walking the earth or not , it’s routine for delilah to be up before others & to get the day started ; call her the mother hen , but she enjoys it. she enjoys the atmosphere of her camp mates beginning their days , their jobs --- and she doesn’t mind how much she has to pitch in to ease them into fighting another day , into helping them to KEEP FIGHTING.
max among them. if there’s anyone in this place , apart from aster , that delilah is INTENT on supporting , it’s the drowsy male in front of her. ( she doesn’t have siblings to worry about or a family to care for , so it seems she’s made a new one. ) ❛ you’re welcome. ❜ legs come to cross beneath her as she seats herself at the foot of his bed , fingers wrapping themselves around the cup to secure the warmth filling her palms. ❛ wait --- you actually want me to turn into the energizer bunny? oh you must really love to be tortured. ❜ a laugh emits from the girl , before she brings the cup up to her lips. ❛ but uh-huh --- one day you won’t have to forget though , because it'll just become NORMALITY again. coffee & starbucks and traffic & bills --- don’t you think? ❜ she likes to think so , but then , delilah rosenberg is destined to feel so HOPEFUL for a promising future in this cruel one , that the thought of it ever not moving on from the way it was now is completely improbable in her mind.
Sophocles, Elektra (trans. Anne Carson)
@tenderbled
* prditflorem !
“ don’t worry, if someone had ruined it i probably would’ve broken their arm” it was meant as a joke, aster wouldn’t physically harm anyone but if someone did destroy her stuff she would give that person a piece of her mind. aster wasn’t one for any violent confrontation but in the past months she had gotten into a few fights defending the things she stood for, it didn’t end pretty but with each experience she learnt, even if it hurt. “ see beef jerky is just nasty, i don’t get how you can eat that because it looks and smells like dog treats”, aster wasn’t a vegetarian but there were some foods that she refused to eat, she was quite the picky eater at times and she knew that it came at great disadvantage during these times. the girl nodded at delilah’s question, moving some things around so she could sit comfortably, aster was never one to say no to company and even less delilah’s, it was nice being around someone as kind as her, it made her happy. “ there you go, i was going to bring some more pillows out but i didn’t think anyone would come out to see the sunset, everyone is worried with the whole ‘there’s people eating us’ thing” she spoke with a small laugh, for aster the outbreak wasn’t even a huge deal anymore, she was just trying to live her best life.
❛ you can break their arm and i can give them a piece of my mind, or . . . .or just tell them off gently ---- i’ll just be there for moral support & emotional backup for sure. ❜ the extent of her aggressive streak ; in fact , there had been few moments in her life that had resulted in VIOLENCE. her brothers were the violent type ( her sister was the vengeful type. ) and usually dealt with her ordeals for her , not that she APPROVED of the act of assaulting another in any form. confrontation , delilah had learnt , was generally something you could IGNORE , especially if the ending result would be another being harmed ---- she couldn’t handle hurting another , she couldn’t handle taking another’s life. it is not in her jurisdiction to play the OPPRESSOR just like it’s not in her jurisdiction to play GOD. ❛ it literally is ! in fact , even chester won’t touch it. ❜ and she has tried , many of times , to palm it off on her canine companion with complete failure --- the dog has looked at her like she was an idiot. tucking her legs beneath her , delilah takes her place besides her friend. ❛ so true , and the world isn’t going to heal if they don’t try moving on from that. ❜ delilah UNDERSTANDS the importance of security & survival , but that’s just breathing -- it’s not living , it’s not moving on , it’s not seeing the beauty in a sunset and knowing there’s a future beyond what they possess now ( and it doesn’t involve an endless WAR & STRUGGLE. ) ❛ and besides , they’re missing out on sunsets and berries. ❜ she smiles , plopping another in her mouth & staring up at the arrangement of colours spread out across the skies. ❛ i usually come out after the sun goes down to be honest -- i love the stars , the moon ! -- when i was younger , besides something in music , i had this crazy idea that i was going to be an astronomer & work somewhere cool like NASA. ❜ but why bother with the family she had? why bother when rising to the top felt like you were drowning in ICE ? ---- pessimism is not allowed when it comes to delilah rosenberg. ❛ but anyway , ❜ change of subject ( no use getting stuck in the past -- you’ll get lost there. ) she gestures to the sketchbook , hues glimmering with curiosity. ❛ what have you been working on? ❜
- ; phrases that really hit you where it hurts
“ did you really have to be that honest? ” “ every time i see you i just feel more alone. ” “ you changed me. ” “ was this all just a joke to you? ” “ i don’t want to know. ” “ can we start over? ” “ you make me feel so insecure. ” “ i don’t know if i can love you. ” “ every time i wake up i’m reaching for you … but you’re never there. ” “ of course it meant something! ” “ stop yelling! ” “ i gave up on you a long time ago. ” “ you think i care about you? cute. ” “ did you just forget about me or something? ” “ i still need you. ” “ i wanna say that there’s still hope but sometimes things just don’t go your way. ” “ you said you would keep trying! ” “ no, you ARE strong. ” “ you promised me! ” “ fine. you’ll never see me again, okay? ” “ i gave you everything i had. ” “ your eyes can be so cruel … ” “ i can never do anything right can i !? ” “ i want my life back. ” “ stop crying. ” “ you should go. ” “ don’t come back. ” “ does hurting me make you feel good or something? ” “ just stop it. ” “ i was never in love with you now leave me alone! ”
ok sO it’s college day tomorrow & i wanted to get stuff done tonight but then a friend came over and now i need to get to sleep early if i want to avoid my lecturer calling me out for being late smh she’s one scary woman i’m terrified of her. below is a little to-do to set me on track when i get home tomorrow tho, if i’m missing someone or you’d like a starter from one of my girls comment below or hmu !
WHAT FLOWER ARE YOU ?
you are LAVENDER.
you have a soothing presence, people love your company and you always know how to make them feel better. you are thoughtful and considerate, often putting others first. you can make strangers feel at home. no matter how sad someone is feeling, you can always provide comfort and solace !
( * HS TASK 002: AESTHETICS ! — delilah r.
❛ she posses an INNOCENCE so d e s t r u c t i v e , it puts ANGELS to shame. ❜