actually me, LC @tenderkweer - Tumblr Blog

ily, menswear guy

when a pelican bites you there's no malice in their eyes. they aren't upset at you. they are just hungry and want to see if you fit in their mouths. and if you don't then it's no problem and everything is fine. and if you do then well i guess your fate is sealed but that's ok it's a beautiful animal

marlynnofmany

Okay, see, I knew about the capybara gif:

But I didn’t know that they really are That Dense, All The Time. The same way sharks will bite anything that might be a seal, just in case, these birdbrains will apparently test just about anything for beak size.

Behold a short list of bad ideas:

Human foot is not food, bird.

That is clearly bigger than your entire body.

...You do know what a bear cub is, right? Right??

That is a BICYCLE SEAT.

That’s it; arrested for bird crimes.

xenosaurus

I turn 30 next month so here’s what I learned in my 20s:

—don’t work for startups, they’re always one ‘innovative idea’ away adding ‘sell your kidneys on the black market’ to your job description.

—keeping a collection of basic OTC medicine on you will save your life one day. I recommend Advil, Imodium, and TUMS.

—those little single-use glasses cleaning wipes are 1000% worth the money

—overly self-depreciating jokes just make people uncomfortable, wean yourself off of them

—you can buy dehydrated mini marshmallows in bulk online and they’re a godsend for hot cocoa

—people don’t care if you have fidget toys on your desk they just want to play with them

—try to go to bed BEFORE the existential ennui kicks in

thelittleblackfox

Also drink water and eat a plant

liz-squids

This is all GREAT. I turned 40 last week, so permit me to add what I learned in my 30s:

keep on not working for startups

sometimes there comes a point where the thing (fandom, hobby, friendship, romantic relationship) you loved no longer brings you joy. And that's okay. Try to mourn the loss, take joy in the memories, and don't burn any bridges in case ten years go by and you find yourself back in that fandom/hobby/relationship again

it turns out that (ugh) moderate regular exercise is (spit) good for you. The sooner you make it part of your life, the easier it'll be

related: if you throw yourself into a new exercise regime too hard and too fast, without stopping to rest or consider whether a particular move is good for you ... well, shoulder injuries are painful and consults with orthopedic surgeons are expensive

knees are bastards too

don't even get me started on ankles

there may come a time when your digestive system is too fragile for ibuprofin. I'm sorry

one day you're gonna wake up and realise you no longer give any fucks about some things that used to bother you

on the other hand, you might be alarmed to realise what you still give a fuck about

never get down on the floor without an exit strategy for getting back up

covington-shenanigans

I turn 50 this year. what I have learned in my 40s:

"loving yourself" is less of a feeling and more of an action. you can start doing it any time and it will make your life better and better as you go on

this will happen incrementally - be patient

along those lines, if you haven't started making an active effort to quit shit-talking yourself, suck it up and do it

no, shut up. do it. "but it's haaaaard!" don't care. do it.

whether you like it or not, you are mortal and you need to go to the doctor for an annual checkup

stretch regularly - your future self will thank you

at some point you will encounter people much younger than you arguing passionately and incorrectly about history you personally remember and experienced

this will be infuriating and annoying

otoh, most other things just... will not matter to you as much

at some point you will shift from wanting to go out to being like "eh" and deciding to stay in. this is okay.

you will have absolutely no idea what The Youth are talking about and you will not care

but if you keep your mind open to new ideas you'll never be irrelevant

your company still doesn't love you - don't give them more than they pay you for

get a fucking hobby, especially a hobby that involves physically creating/handling something and/or moving your body in physical space. it will do you more good than you can imagine

atlinmerrick

Just turned 60 and let me say:

Find joy, every kind, it's always worth it

I'm talking that massive, never-ending Discord chat with your bestie? The one that makes you giggle through the day? It's not a "waste of time," it's what time was made for

If that's fanfic for your favorite characters who never even met on screen celebrate that!

If that's building a tiny fleet of snake villagers for your snake town and they just cover your mantel hell yes!

If that's collecting pillows and making a fort of them every weekend I'll be right over

Feeling and sharing joy is the whole point

cricketcat9

This is too tempting…, so, I’m 74, and: don’t fund startups

Please keep stretching and exercise enough NOT to need an elaborate strategy to get up from the floor. IT MAY SAVE YOUR LIFE

Say bye to your employer as early as you possibly can, unless you really love your job. You won’t be sorry.

Keep doing the annual checkups 🙏🏼

Enjoy that fucking hobby you’ve acquired in your 50, or find something new. Do try new things & adventures.

swarnpert

my favorite thing is to say "investing in" instead of "buying"

amazoogle

just closed on a big deal with a major grocery chain vis-a-vis the procurement of some fresh strawberries

kindlygoblin

yummy-tummy-time

wiisagi-maiingan

Why do so many people make tiktoks while they're clearly driving. What the fuck. Stop that shit, you're gonna kill someone.

wiisagi-maiingan

I think people online treat driving too casually tbh, like there was a poll about people's bad habits while driving and they weren't bad habits or problematic or whatever, they were all things that literally kill people every single day. You are driving a massive vehicle that can very easily turn into a murder weapon with your carelessness, take this shit seriously.

wiisagi-maiingan

"Haha I never use my turn signals" you are going to kill someone.

"I don't do full stops at stop signs lol" you are going to kill someone.

"Sometimes I text while I'm driving 🤭" YOU ARE GOING TO KILL SOMEONE.

wiisagi-maiingan

Also people who speed up or suddenly stop or swerve a lot to freak out someone in the car for fun: it stops being funny when you get into a car accident because of it. Just so you know.

bi-planeandsimple

Thank you!!! This is a huge pet peeve of mine (or maybe stronger? Like a Hill to die on?) if you are parked in your garage or driveway, fine. Shoot a video in your car. But on the highway??? The freaking highway??? Where cars are going anywhere from 65 MPH to 90 MPH??? That’s where you want to look down to send a text? or make sure you are in frame for your video? not looking at the road or the other cars around you?????

you actually can wait to do a video. Pull over, take an to an exit, go to a rest stop, something, and write down your idea in your notes app or whatever, then do the video or send the text when you get home. Or at least do it while parked at the rest stop!

even if you are driving slowly on a quiet street, you need to pay attention to your surroundings. Unless you are clairvoyant, you should be focused on driving well. A kid can run out of a house into the street even on a quiet neighborhood. Or an adult. Another car could back out in front of you suddenly. Literally anything can and does happen! The point is you don’t know, and can’t know - you can only be present.

And on the highway it’s way worse!! I can’t let this go actually - There are so many people driving on the highway and you have no idea what their driving experience is or whether they are even paying attention! The only thing you can control is you not being distracted. Because two drivers on the highway that are distracted increases the chances for a crash a ton, and if other drivers are distracted too, then they could increase the number of casualties. The fewer ppl drive distracted, the better for everyone.

The point of not being distracted is so you don’t endanger others, yes, but also so you can quickly react to sudden environmental changes (a huge tree branch falling in the road, a flat tire, a deer, a mudslide, a reckless driver) or other emergencies. While driving, you only have seconds (or less) to A) notice *something* is wrong and B) figure out what exactly is happening C) choose a course of action to mitigate damage and D) carry out the course of action. The seconds it takes you to pull attention away from your phone when you are texting or filming a video can mean the difference between life or death. For the driver and everyone else on the road.

tenderkweer

I have actually been hit by a car as a cyclist as well as been injured other times because people drive like that. Also had people honk at me because they didn't use their turn signals and I used the information they weren't providing to make a decision about when to go. I always signal on my bike, follow all the rules, etc and it's still very dangerous.

emmaharwoods

you can click on this button once daily to help palestine and support other causes in the middle east for free. it takes literally 5 seconds and could help save lives so please take the time to click and share this link.

grelliam

#oh it raises money thru ad revenue and ur click confirms the value to advertisers. neat

bogleech

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but telling a white supremacist “you don’t speak for me and are not in fact normal” is a very fair and good thing to do. It’s not at all the same as making a “not all white people” comment like the last guy thinks, and it’s especially cringeworthy that he’s another, different white guy himself. It’s like trying too hard to flex allyship. Don’t be a pedant to people who are shutting down a racist’s argument.

headspace-hotel

If a fascist says “actually I’m just saying what everyone is secretly thinking” it is a moral duty to go “no the fuck you aren’t”

meandtherodentinthewall

There is a massive, massive difference between telling a person of color talking about racism “not ALL white people, I’m an ally so you don’t mean me right uWu” and telling a fucking white supremacist “uh, no, fuck you, you don’t speak for me.”

If you can’t tell the difference, log off Twitter until you can because Discourse has rotted your brain

rhube

This is also why ‘just ignore them’ (which is prescribed aggressively everywhere online these days) isn’t always the best plan.

Quite apart from being affirming to the fascist, it lets their statement stand for others. It allows the Overton window to creep. You don’t have to stay and debate them. You can even block them immediately after, focusing on giving your protest solely to others who will find the fascist’s post. But a quick, 'No, we don’t all think like yoy actually’ can be a very important thing to say.

greelin

me when i fucking GET you

crazycatsiren

Just a quick not friendly reminder: someone who has apologized for past mistakes, made amends for past actions, and clearly no longer holds past beliefs, is a far better person than one who digs up old dirt and uses a person's past that no longer exists against them.