It ain't easy being cheesy

7/7/1297 Vampire 🧛‍♀️ they/them

[midnightssea]

it’s amazing how women are able to navigate crowded rooms without ever touching a palm to a man’s lower back

[thememedaddy]

[starcrier]

and you know what? i am REALLY sick of these ads that are openly mocking people for being concerned about the products they’re selling.

Amazon’s super bowl ad where the Alexa mocks Chris Hemsworth for being worried about giving spy software control over his entire life. Waymo’s ad with the intro “the robots are coming!” mocking people who are rightfully extremely concerned about sharing the road with, or riding in, self-driving cars.

i don’t know, it’s just genuinely insane to me. “Oh, you have legitimate concerns about our shitty product? sounds like you’re just lame!!!” like what kind of “quiet part out loud” marketing is that?

[starcrier]

so this post blew the hell up — which is i’m sure a sign that things are very normal and fine and none of us are remotely frustrated by this kind of thing — but it’s given me time to think about how to articulate the SECOND thing that pisses me off about these ads, which is that they don’t even bother to address the concerns.

i feel like any normal ad would go, for example, “i know you’ve heard that this shaving cream might give you cancer. but it doesn’t! and also it smells nice!”

but THESE ads mock you, and then go “anyway, your concerns are invalid because our self-driving cars that run over children at crosswalks have heated seats!”

it reminds me, in a much less comical way, of that scene from Emperors New Groove when the angel and devil on Kronk’s shoulders are having a debate, and the devil goes “don’t listen to that guy, because look what i can do” and then does a handstand. Only these are real-life commercials. That they expect you to take seriously.

[dozydawn]

[two-goblins-in-a-trench-coat]

a CRITTER? Carrying a BERRY?? Across a BRAMBLE VINE?????

[bellbottom-jeans]

*makes original post* 0 notes

*makes fandom post* 100 notes

*replies to a post, not visible in reblog, on a post about history or something* 1000 likes

[necromancelena]

I'm going to fix everything in the next three hours everyone wish me luck. if i dont then probably ill dig a hole and lie down in it for a bit in the rain/sun/whatever outside looks like these days

[necromancelena]

the hole isnt even that bad

[release-the-sheep]

just witnessed something devastating

guy on the subway with one ear pierced, little gold hoop. other guy on the subway very quickly and subtly googling "which one is the gay ear". it is not the gay ear. visible disappointment on his face as he puts his phone away.

[neenarchive]

they can't stop you from thinking about gay sex on company time

[shinolavolume1-deactivated20240]

[shinolavolume1-deactivated20240]

[were--ralph]

i sent this gif to a black cowowker at work then later asked my white manager if he likes apple fritters and he was like "i fuckin love apple friters" and she laughed so hard she got a migraine

[legallybrunettedotcom]

[inbabylontheywept]

Until death, all defeat is psychological.

[infectiouspiss]

disabled ppl we need to start lying to nosy people okay? you tell me i'm too young to need a cane and i will tell you point blank that maybe you should tell that to the guy who ran me over. you don't get an explanation of my health issues you get lies and depending on how much of an asshole i want to be that lie will be anything from a humble car crash to a 1 billion lions attack. mind yr business.

[infectiouspiss]

"i could never live like that" well maybe you'll have to because this happened overnight. yeah you heard me i was the most able bodied man in the world but then one morning bam i woke up disabled. yeah you could have that too. there's no cure either you'll just wake up one morning and now you have to live like me

[infectiouspiss]

"what happened" well have you ever seen looney tunes? yeah an anvil landed on me and squished me flat.

[dajo42]

does it still count as watching a movie if you consume the entire thing split up into 120 youtube shorts over the course of four months

[teenagerposts]

When you insist on treating your friend

[coffeepeople]

One time a friend told me that if she wanted to have a chill night she would come to me and ask for tea and a book to read. I didn’t like tea at the time, but I always made sure my cupboards had them in case she needed a quiet night. One time I told my boss that I loved oranges, but couldn’t peel them because of my nails. For a year he made sure to peel me one at least once a week. Once my friends gave me a made up superlative of “most likely to have a pen they could borrow” and ever since I’ve made sure I always carry a pen with me. A long time ago, my high school librarian told me that no one would care what my grade in my sophomore chemistry class was if I’m bringing them doughnuts and asking them about their day.

[coffeepeople]

Sometimes friendship is about carrying pens and peeling oranges. But the point is, surrounding yourself with people who you want to do the little things for. The point of it all is bringing in the doughnuts because you’ve found the people who deserve the doughnuts.

[big-smiling-monkey]

How sweet it is to be with people you enjoy taking care of

[theboredvoid]

there's always some bullshit happening on reddit

[7aceofdiamonds7]

[fooliofailure]

bro thay put transgender in me

[fooliofailure]

you’re good queen. i mispelt “they”. Some kind of yrbasgender i am. i deserve to have it suques out of me likr a ksoquito

[dreamlogic]

asked one of my coworkers how she's doing today and she goes "could be better, could be worse," and another coworker nearby who was eavesdropping chimes in with "could be a lil bit o' alligator curse!" i have no idea what he meant by that but i do know that it has been immediately added to the lexicon.