when I'm on my deathbed im going to queue like 15,000 posts from the perspective of someone who's dead and in hell so that the blogging never ends

ellievsbear

izzy's playlists!
official daine visual archive
noise dept.

gracie abrams
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH

#extradirty
The Stonewall Inn
NASA
Claire Keane
untitled
Monterey Bay Aquarium

if i look back, i am lost
Mike Driver

@theartofmadeline

No title available
almost home
I'd rather be in outer space đ¸
trying on a metaphor

pixel skylines
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@texashippiecowboy
when I'm on my deathbed im going to queue like 15,000 posts from the perspective of someone who's dead and in hell so that the blogging never ends
no it really is that summer time sadness
i actually think it's scary that we seem to be forgetting what regular human beings look like and that in some cases it's being deliberately accelerated by incels and their esoteric mythology of appearance now that they have the cultural microphone. it's scary that i can watch a movie from like 1991 and be like "oh if this woman was cast as a leading lady today it'd be a culture war outrage session about ugly women being shoved in our faces"
Having PTSD is like every day you wake up and itâs 2007 and itâs been 2007 for over a decade and youâve been aging rapidly and every day is dealing with some horrible shit that happened yesterday but it wasnât yesterday it was over a decade ago and youâve been 13 for 11 years running around trying to figure out why your entire body is on vibrate and wonât stop ringing
girl with ptsd voice: hey, so something really bad is gonna happen, right? you guys are picking up on that too, yeah? The other shoe is about to drop, I just know it.
salad is mostly items
they dont tell you this but you carry your upset younger self in you like a parasitic twin
what to do when everythingâs a mess
Wash your hair. Donât worry about all those articles online about the best haircare products of 2019 and whatnot, get in, wash it like you usually do, get out. Leave it to air dry, itâs less work for you.
Brush your teeth. Even if you brushed them this morning and are probably going to brush it tonight, do it anyway. Especially if itâs exam time, all that tea or coffee youâre most likely downing (props to you if you only study with water) probably makes them feel kind of gross.
I know most of these lists tell you to run a bath, but letâs face it, for those of you who even have a bath in the first place, the thought of filling that tub and sitting there in complete silence for a couple hours seems like a trek. And ironically exhausting. So instead, just brush your hair, take a nap (set a nice soothing alarm) and once youâve gotten out of bed, wash your face or at least splash cold water on your face.
CLEAN clean clean clean CLEAN. Easier said than done, but at least start by clearing one messy component of your area; it could be your floor, your desk or your bed. You donât need to clean and re-organise your entire room marie condo-style for you to actually have a reason to take the time to clean in the first place. A little goes a long way, and you donât ALWAYS need to do the hard yards ya know.
I would say read a book, but sometimes your brain is melting or buzzing so it canât really focus on anything lengthy. So instead, find someone reciting a poem online, and just listen to it. I recommend Jeremy Irons and his voicing of tons of T.S Eliot poetry, or Allen Ginsberg reciting his own poetry (Howl is a classic).
If youâre one of those people who drowns their sorrows by listening to music, donât listen to music!! Donât reinforce your pain!! So to that I say, listen to a podcast. If the classic podcast genre of true crime is a little too stressful and youâve already cried twice today, listen to interviews with actors, screenwriters and directors. It can be really refreshing to listen to people you already enjoy the content of talk about their work. I recommend Awards Chatter and Happy Sad Confused.
Stop staring at screens! Just physically sit outside for a bit, you donât need to go for a jog or do a general workout, justâŚsit. People-watch, try and memorise the exact scene in front of you, from the mis-en-scene to all the colours and sounds and the way the sunlight feels on your eyelashes. Write it down if you want to, you could even denote a single notebook to your little outdoor descriptions. Or just write on a napkin. To each their own.
Have you eaten today? And I mean something hearty, something that isnât primarily made out of air and salt. Something that falls under the umbrella of snack does not count; meal is more like it. If not, eat. Preparing food might feel exhausting, but soâs going a relatively long amount of time without something nutritionally substantial.
If youâre feeling emotionally heavily, get out a notebook or even just a scrap of paper, a pen and cry until your eyes are as blurry as can be. With tears down your cheeks, scribble out how youâre feeling. Donât bother with how neat or messy it is, whether the sentences even stay on the lines, itâs not about being aesthetic. In fact, itâs about being as messy as possible. Let all of it out, and let is act as a physical manifestation of whatâs going on in your head. Donât fight it or deny it, relieve yourself by both constructing and understanding yourself.Â
my body craves information
she substance on my abuse till I sunday
Julia Soboleva, âIs Anyone Home?â
Wigstock, on the West Side Highway, New York City, Photo by Mariette Pathy Allen, 1998
Robert Watts | Cahuenga Pass
i love that they both had red hair at the same time...same shade too my twins đđ