The Glorious, Indomitable, Thaszar the Invincible

You know you love me.

[thaszar-the-invincible]

Anyways I'm on my way to beat up Duke Sliscus, does anyone want me to get them anything while I'm in the webway?

[tzeentch-official]

We would like a webway wall sample. We have not previously had the option for a soulless entity to retrieve one, and wish to observe possible effects of souls on it. We would prefer one with minimal chaos alteration.

[thaszar-the-invincible]

Before I say yes to this, is the sample going to explode if the Abbek gets near it?

[tzeentch-official]

We didn't make the thing. Besides, if it's anything like the last incident, it would require your Abbek to act unwisely upon it. We note that We want this for experimental reasons, and thus are not able to say with certainty what it will do.

[thaszar-the-invincible]

Hm. I'm torn. On the one hand, fuck them elves. On the other hand, given the dolmen gates, I don't think it's a great idea to risk breaking the webway entirely on account of I do still need that.

[tzeentch-official]

The whole place is collapsing. Just take a bit from a passage that leads to a sealed-off section and nothing else.

[thaszar-the-invincible]

Aye, it is, but are you going to make it collapse faster if you get what you want?

[tzeentch-official]

We do not know what the outcome of Our experiment shall be, and have no specific hopes. It would be wasteful to tear open the webway. Plenty of holes open up by themselves, and whilst it endures Our servants know where the elves cannot go. Were it to fall, they may well choose to brave the Warp. And We would devour the incautious, but Slaanesh would devour far more, and they would be able to reach all of the galaxy. The webway suits Us to endure.

[thaszar-the-invincible]

Well, you have logical points, there. Of course, a fellow can't trust anything he reads, can he?

Here's the thing. Neither of us know what you'd do. And, sure, if I wanted something as boring as certainty I'd have become an accountant instead of a pilot. Maybe gone to cryptek school and disinherited myself out of succession like the old man always wanted. Usually I'm okay with gambling on the cards I have.

But I do need the webway to limp on for a while, given that I've got an immortality to use it until I die. Kinda how things work when we don't have warp travel, unless someone figures out how to bludgeon a c'tan shard into telling us how to make new dolmen gates that work. The stakes are just a bit too high on this one.

[thaszar-the-invincible]

Getting close to drukhari space. Which you can always tell by the weird escaped specimens. Today's entry in the list of Unauthorized Fucking Things The Biomancer Smuggled On Board is some kind of bloodsucking flying thing made of gelatin and a nervous system.

Unreleatedly, if anyone needs the biomancer, he's scrubbing gelatin splatters off the walls and will be until he gets my ship sparkling clean again.

[thaszar-the-invincible]

Anyways I'm on my way to beat up Duke Sliscus, does anyone want me to get them anything while I'm in the webway?

[tzeentch-official]

We would like a webway wall sample. We have not previously had the option for a soulless entity to retrieve one, and wish to observe possible effects of souls on it. We would prefer one with minimal chaos alteration.

[thaszar-the-invincible]

Before I say yes to this, is the sample going to explode if the Abbek gets near it?

[tzeentch-official]

We didn't make the thing. Besides, if it's anything like the last incident, it would require your Abbek to act unwisely upon it. We note that We want this for experimental reasons, and thus are not able to say with certainty what it will do.

[thaszar-the-invincible]

Hm. I'm torn. On the one hand, fuck them elves. On the other hand, given the dolmen gates, I don't think it's a great idea to risk breaking the webway entirely on account of I do still need that.

[tzeentch-official]

The whole place is collapsing. Just take a bit from a passage that leads to a sealed-off section and nothing else.

[thaszar-the-invincible]

Aye, it is, but are you going to make it collapse faster if you get what you want?

[goldenthroneresident]

LISTENING TO THE “TZEENTCHLINGS” MAKES ME WANT TO SHOOT MYSELF IN THE FOOT

[ask-kairos-fateweaver]

i am sure we wouldn't stop you :}

[goldenthroneresident]

I WOULD IF I COULD, BUT MALC IS VERY SCARY, AND HAS FORBADE ME FROM DOING SO.

[althaineblog]

Malcador smiled invisibly, and the Emperor got the sense that the Sigillite was proud.

[ask-kairos-fateweaver]

ah, humans, so dreadfully boring :}

[faketzeentchofficial]

And so Dreadfully predictable

[tzeentch-official]

We reccomend that We spend more time with necrons. The lack of souls stops Us from reading them when We don't want to. We tend to keep an eyes on Thaszar.

[thaszar-the-invincible]

...Charmed to hear it?

[sweepingstars]

"Whatever. Go, my scarab."

— Magnus the red probably idk

[ask-trazyn-hewhoiscalledinfinite]

No, that was me actually

[oltyx-the-twice-dead-king]

Also me. The scarab was me too.

[thaszar-the-invincible]

We are all commanding scarabs on this delightful day.

[unfailingeagle]

Let's kill Space Marines with mama

[thaszar-the-invincible]

Anyways I'm on my way to beat up Duke Sliscus, does anyone want me to get them anything while I'm in the webway?

[tzeentch-official]

We would like a webway wall sample. We have not previously had the option for a soulless entity to retrieve one, and wish to observe possible effects of souls on it. We would prefer one with minimal chaos alteration.

[thaszar-the-invincible]

Before I say yes to this, is the sample going to explode if the Abbek gets near it?

[tzeentch-official]

We didn't make the thing. Besides, if it's anything like the last incident, it would require your Abbek to act unwisely upon it. We note that We want this for experimental reasons, and thus are not able to say with certainty what it will do.

[thaszar-the-invincible]

Hm. I'm torn. On the one hand, fuck them elves. On the other hand, given the dolmen gates, I don't think it's a great idea to risk breaking the webway entirely on account of I do still need that.

[rukafais]

I do love the concept of a guy who just has a bunch of other people following him around who refuse to explain anything to him (or if they do it just raises more questions). Is this a very elaborate power play. Do they want to study him like a bug. Who knows.

[thaszar-the-invincible]

Anyways I'm on my way to beat up Duke Sliscus, does anyone want me to get them anything while I'm in the webway?

[tzeentch-official]

We would like a webway wall sample. We have not previously had the option for a soulless entity to retrieve one, and wish to observe possible effects of souls on it. We would prefer one with minimal chaos alteration.

[thaszar-the-invincible]

Before I say yes to this, is the sample going to explode if the Abbek gets near it?

[berryinnit]

t-shirt with the words “high-functioning corpse” printed on it

[nostalgia-eh52]

1981 Morris Calendar July

[catilinas]

i love shipping magazines and i especially love them when they sound like they were written by a mildly aggravated cargo ship

[thaszar-the-invincible]

Anyways I'm on my way to beat up Duke Sliscus, does anyone want me to get them anything while I'm in the webway?

[befikra]

i bet it feels good to be an underwater plant just swaying in sync with the flow of water

[befikra]

[thestuffedalligator]

There’s a certain folkloric idea that if you die at sea, your soul is sort of. Inextricably stuck in the sea. Because your body is irretrievable, your soul is also irretrievable, down out of the reach of the gods who look at the surface of the world. In Norse mythology, they said that the souls of sailors who died at sea are caught in the sea-goddess Rán’s net and dragged into her domain, a distinct and separate afterlife alongside Hel and Valhalla. Davy Jones Locker. The funayūrei. A lot of cultures agree that once sea has a hold on you, even when your body has rotted and dwindled and been made food for crabs, it still won’t let you go.

Do you think we’re going to wind up saying the same thing about astronauts.

[ask-trazyn-hewhoiscalledinfinite]

cutlass, obviously - @thaszar-the-invincible

A yes, the cutlass. A weapon associated with mortal pirates. Good at cutting, terrible at everything else.

A fitting weapon for a less civilized kind of collector

[thaszar-the-invincible]

What else do you need from a cutlass? It's a sword! They're supposed to be good at cutting things!

[cursed-40k-thoughts]

so what would Orikan get from a starbucks?

I hope that decrepit little twink gets salmonella, personally

[thaszar-the-invincible]

@archaeovist-trazyn @ask-trazyn-hewhoiscalledinfinite