So This Is Life @thatbahamaschick - Tumblr Blog

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i love old ladies

i’m at the bus stop and these two very old ladies suddenly recognize each other and very sincerely one goes “holy shit you’re still alive!!” and the other says “i’m gonna outlive my husband if it kills me”

homunculus-argument

the universe: okay, you’re a human. I gave you free will and a conscious mind, so you’re free to do whatever you want. So what do you wanna do?

human: GO FAST

the universe: well, you’re a perfect pursuit predator but if that’s the way you want to evolve, go ahead.

human, climbing on a horse: GO FAST

the universe: wait what

human, inventing the carriage, the car and the bullet train: GO FASTER

the universe: I IMPLORE YOU TO STOP

human, trying to figure out lightspeed travel: FAS T ER

abstractandedgyname

human:

THEORETICALLY MAXIMUM FAST

the universe:

babyanimalgifs

Find someone who supports you like this cat supports his owner’s music

via @sarperduman

obsessedwithromancetropes

The cat is sooo soothed by his music its so freaking cute!!! And damn is this man talented

just-shower-thoughts

It’s almost as if Hugh Hefner was projecting a force-field that protected creepy famous men, and with his death they were suddenly exposed.

dorkaelskunkworks

I prefer the “Carrie Fisher is doing her good work from beyond the grave” hypothesis, but hey. You do you.

postmodernmulticoloredcloak

Why do you think those two phenomena are mutually exclusive

dorkaelskunkworks

The concept that Carrie Fisher murdered Hugh Hefner from beyond the veil is actually pretty goddamn satisfying now that you mention it.

sktagg23

Dr. Seuss was not even in the general area of fucking around.

qvyens

#everyone thinks of dr seuss as some sweet old guy who wrote kids books and made up cute words#little do they know he was the most hardcore political motherfucker to ever draw cartoons for newspapers of all time basically#he was of german and jewish descent and got bullied a lot as a kid#then he grew up and drew cartoons for the school paper#and when he got fired for being to fucking real for the paper to handle he made up a new name and KEPT SUBMITTING THEM ANYWAY#BECAUSE HE NEVER FUCKED AROUND FOR A SECOND#DID YOU KNOW DR SEUSS DID A FEATURE LENGTH DOCUMENTARY AFTER WWII ABOUT HOW WWII WASN’T ACTUALLY OVER AND THE NAZIS WERE STILL ALL AROUND#IT WAS CREEPY AS ALL FUCK AND MORE HARDCORE THAN YOU WILL EVER KNOW#IT WON A FUCKING OSCAR OR SOME SHIT#HE DID KIDS BOOKS ON A WHIM HIS REAL TALENT WAS DISMANTLING FASCIST REGIMES WITH ADORABLE BLACK AND WHITE SKETCHES OF TURTLES#OH YEAH AND YURTLE THE TURTLE WAS ABOUT HITLER#AND THE SNEECHES WERE ABOUT SEGREGATION#SO FUCK Y’ALL AND YOUR CANDY-ASS VISION OF DR SEUSS

alcoholicintrovert

I think almost all of his stories have a deeper meaning and Horton Hears a who was written as an apology to the Japanese after WWII

samjoetemple

Holy guac

captainsavage42

Also the Pro-life movement used his line “a person’s a person no matter how small” on their literature without his permission, and he made them stop using it an apologize because he was pro-choice.