The most trustworthy lawyer

A ask and roleplay blog for the Disney comic character Sylvester Shyster. Run by https://www.tumblr.com/local-meme-lord

[thatgreenshyster]

About

Name: Sylvester Shyster

Species: ????

Age: Late 50s

Description:

Sylvester Shyster is a conniving lawyer who is constantly on the hunt for riches and power.

With the knowledge of the law on the side, there are a few lows he is willing to go to achieve his goals.

He'll find every loophole, twist the wording, bribe the officials, and even attempt to cause an ''unfortunate accident" just to have his way.

However, due to legal reasons, Sylvester prefers to dispose of those who stand in their way as indirectly as possible- it's not his fault Mickey triggered the gun trap (that he stepped up)..

But fear not, because of the indirect approach, it's possible for them to escape and try to stop his scheme!

Just be careful because he might sue you once it is all said and done.

Headcanons:

A Plus Student back in prep school.

Not sports guy

Classical Music Enjoyer

Light drinker

Can't cook very well.

Rules:

Shipping is allowed but No NSFW or smut

No politics, drama, or other discourse.

In the true spirit of comics, No excessive swearing- if you must excessively swear censor it with @#$%!

No excessive blood or gore

OCs and self-inserts are allowed.

Please do not ask for real-life legal advice. Mun is not a real lawyer.

No godmoding (taking control of my character without permission)

Please be patient, Mun is new to Tumblr roleplay

[yourpalmickeymouse]

PFFT HAHA!!! You guys ain't gonna believe this. This LOSER uses Tumblr, Tumblr, of all things. Ain't that a riot.

Jackin' this idiot's phone is the best thing I've ever done. What else doe this moron have.?

[thatgreenshyster]

Oh, what a heartbreaking, our favorite wannabe detective, got his phone got stolen. It is such a shame that some of his important information is now at the hands of an unknown person that could leak it at any moment.

I certainly hope he has a good lawyer.

Heh

[yourpalmickeymouse]

Well if it ain't Shyster.

How's it goin' pal?

Yeah I am a bit of a moron to leave my phone behind at the park bench. Kinda makes you wonder how a dolt like me could even catch crooks like you or that one handsome devil of a gray mouse.

But don't worry I, Mickey Mouse, has totally got my phone back and is ready to answer all your dumb questions or whatever I do here.

[thatgreenshyster]

It's been going wonderful today, and I assure you that any allegations of crooknisness will be clear up in the courtroom.

[yourpalmickeymouse]

PFFT HAHA!!! You guys ain't gonna believe this. This LOSER uses Tumblr, Tumblr, of all things. Ain't that a riot.

Jackin' this idiot's phone is the best thing I've ever done. What else doe this moron have.?

[thatgreenshyster]

Oh, what a heartbreaking, our favorite wannabe detective, got his phone got stolen. It is such a shame that some of his important information is now at the hands of an unknown person that could leak it at any moment.

I certainly hope he has a good lawyer.

Heh

[umbrablot]

Since WHEN is that half-witted spy a skilled gardener?!

[thatgreenshyster]

I may ask - what did he do to you again? I constantly hear different stories about this little rivalry of yours.

[umbrablot]

A short, encapsulating answer would be that he thinks himself better than he really is.

But to speak more concretely... We ended up running into each other while living undercover at the same small town. I had to pretend to be neighbors with him. And worst of all, these simple-minded locals dragged me into their little gardening club, and HE was there too!

You can fill in the rest yourself, now that my first post makes more sense.

[thatgreenshyster]

Oh goodness, those small town clubs are - how do i put this in a proper manner. They're often rather plebeian when it comes to conversation and activities.

I suspected you were forced to listen about little Billy's football game for four painful hours.

[umbrablot]

Since WHEN is that half-witted spy a skilled gardener?!

[thatgreenshyster]

I may ask - what did he do to you again? I constantly hear different stories about this little rivalry of yours.

[thatgreenshyster]

Stares at you with my eyes

...Pardon? May I help you? What.

[thatgreenshyster]

Mr shyster, Can you file a divorce in someone elses name?

Well, this took an unexpected turn...

After all, I'm more of a criminal lawyer than a divorce lawyer.

Still, this is a hard no from everything i resd. While in general, you can sign documents for another person if you have their permission to do so. Only you can submit that divorce petition.

[thatgreenshyster]

I've heard you claim that you prefer "more challenging clients", correct? Heh. Now, this is a purely hypothetical question, but humor me: would you be able to defend ME?

( @umbrablot )

Hypothetical, yes, I would be able to defend in court if you pay me to do so. After all, even the worst of criminals should have the right to a lawyer, and those lawyer shouldn't be judged on their clients' actions as they are simply doing a must needed service, nothing more, nothing less.

Though a certain mouse may still judge me for doing so, perhaps he should read a little document called the Sixthth Amendment as states the state must provide counsel to anyone accused of a crime.

Thus, taking your case doesn't reflect my morals in the slightest since the state would give you a counsel anyway.

[umbrablot]

Naturally. Who could ever doubt your moral principles? My question was never about that, I assure you.

I meant it more as in... Well, I simply don't think a lawyer defending me in court would be of any use to me, even if it's you. I was asking if you even consider my hypothetical defence plausible. Although, that's laughable, isn't it?

[thatgreenshyster]

Of course, of course, I simply wish to cover all my bases in case that mouse pops his head in.

Now, I wouldn't be so fast to jump that conclusion. A hypothetical defense of you may not be a walk in the park and even laughble to some, but it's not completely impossible with my years of knowledge and experience.

Though, given your reputation, it would have to be executed perfectly to the general public.

[thatgreenshyster]

I've heard you claim that you prefer "more challenging clients", correct? Heh. Now, this is a purely hypothetical question, but humor me: would you be able to defend ME?

( @umbrablot )

Hypothetical, yes, I would be able to defend in court if you pay me to do so. After all, even the worst of criminals should have the right to a lawyer, and those lawyer shouldn't be judged on their clients' actions as they are simply doing a must needed service, nothing more, nothing less.

Though a certain mouse may still judge me for doing so, perhaps he should read a little document called the Sixthth Amendment as states the state must provide counsel to anyone accused of a crime.

Thus, taking your case doesn't reflect my morals in the slightest since the state would give you a counsel anyway.

[thatgreenshyster]

If I may ask, what exactly led you down a path of rotten scheming and lying and criminal activity? Perfectly legitimate business practices and legal activity?

Again, the talk of scheming and criminal activity are merely rumors.

However, as for my lawyer career. It is simply what you do when you come from a family of lawyers. Though, unlike them, I don't stick to soft clients that can be defended by your everyday Joe, I prefer more challenging clients that even the best of the best can't defend, something that truly test my skills and knowledge as a lawyer. Of course, I usually win these cases. After all, I loathe losing.

[thatgreenshyster]

Recently I was informed that there few accusations floating around about me. I ensure you my clients that all these accusations are exaggerations of the truth, my services cost no more than your typical lawyer in Mouseton. I understand it easy to see us lawyer as money-hungry sharks due to tv and cartoons but the truth is we merely want what best for our clients.

[thelovelymissfannycottontail]

How much do your services cost exactly then?

[thatgreenshyster]

All of my services only a mere one hundred dollars per hour, Miss Cottontail, far below the state average of around three hundred dollars, especially for a well-known lawyer as myself.

[thatgreenshyster]

Howdy shyster, just wanted to ask ya a real quick question!

Criminal says what

.... Pardon?

[thatgreenshyster]

Um... Ahem.

Hello Mr. Sylvester Shyster. I am very interested in gettin' involved in some criminal activity.

I was wonderin' if ya had any tips on committin' crimes and gettin' away with it. Do you have any secret tricks you use or places you hide? Ya know something that you wouldn't want a detective or the police to know.

Thanks for the help!

- Future Criminal

Mr. Mouse, I know that is you. How pitful dreadful you send such an outrageous question to my inbox. I know you're getting desperate with that Ink spot running around, but even I expected better from you. Now go bug some else will you?

[yourpalmickeymouse]

I told Detective Casey and Brick that this wasn't gonna work. But do they listen to me? NoooOooo...

Well, whatever you're schemin', I'll figure it out like I always do. You can be sure of that.

[thatgreenshyster]

I do not care what those two told you Mr.Mouse, I'm not scheming anything on this little blog. Though I must say, even with their 'particular' minds, I'm still utterly baffled that they thought this was good idea.

[yourpalmickeymouse]

We can at least agree on that. 🙄

[thatgreenshyster]

Yes, I give it 1/ 10, and that's only because it is sightly amusing to image those two going up to Blotty and asking the same question.

[thatgreenshyster]

Um... Ahem.

Hello Mr. Sylvester Shyster. I am very interested in gettin' involved in some criminal activity.

I was wonderin' if ya had any tips on committin' crimes and gettin' away with it. Do you have any secret tricks you use or places you hide? Ya know something that you wouldn't want a detective or the police to know.

Thanks for the help!

- Future Criminal

Mr. Mouse, I know that is you. How pitful dreadful you send such an outrageous question to my inbox. I know you're getting desperate with that Ink spot running around, but even I expected better from you. Now go bug some else will you?

[yourpalmickeymouse]

I told Detective Casey and Brick that this wasn't gonna work. But do they listen to me? NoooOooo...

Well, whatever you're schemin', I'll figure it out like I always do. You can be sure of that.

[thatgreenshyster]

I do not care what those two told you Mr.Mouse, I'm not scheming anything on this little blog. Though I must say, even with their 'particular' minds, I'm still utterly baffled that they thought this was good idea.

[skelemi]

They're like each other's adopted uncle and nephew

[mice-ducks-and-blots]

"He's the kind of guy who would stick a knife in your back - and then have you arrested for carrying concealed weapons!"

Been reading a comic with the shady lawyer. I like him

(And I found out his name is "Zé Ratão" here in Brazil which I don't know if I can convey why it's so funny. Means literally like "Big Rat Joe")

[thatgreenshyster]

Um... Ahem.

Hello Mr. Sylvester Shyster. I am very interested in gettin' involved in some criminal activity.

I was wonderin' if ya had any tips on committin' crimes and gettin' away with it. Do you have any secret tricks you use or places you hide? Ya know something that you wouldn't want a detective or the police to know.

Thanks for the help!

- Future Criminal

Mr. Mouse, I know that is you. How pitful dreadful you send such an outrageous question to my inbox. I know you're getting desperate with that Ink spot running around, but even I expected better from you. Now go bug some else will you?