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@thatonenightingale-blog
ADVICE BLOG?
So I wanted to quickly drop this quick note; when I created this blog, I made it by the intention of reaching out to as many people as I can and helping as much I could. To make a difference in my generation. I want to help. If anyone has a problem, feel free to ask for advice. I will try to do my best to help. ASK ME ANYTHING. No one in this space will be judgedĀ ā¤
xx, The Nightingale
Do more of what you loveĀ ā”
As a dancer, this is some of the best advice I have ever gotten. However corny and overused this line may be, it really does speak to me. Let me tell you guys a story; so a few weeks ago, I took up a dance class. I loved to dance more than anything... but I was in no way the best. Seeing all these incredibly talented people around me, I felt insignificant. Invisible. And I feel that this is my biggest insecurity. Iām scared to be second best, to be just not good enough. I care too much about what others think of me. I always wanted to be that person who never cared about what anyone said about, but iām not... and that upsets me. I dance to express, not to impress. When I dance, I feel worthy. Like I am goodĀ at something. You know before a performance or anything big thats about to happen, that adrenaline rush you get? TheĀ āthis is itā moment? Ā The feeling of comfort you get when your favourite childhood song is played? The feeling of being warm in a blanket with a cup of hot chocolate when its cold outside? You just smiled while reading that didn't you? Imagine feeling all of this together. Thatās what dance is to me.
You donāt have to be good at something to pursue it. You have to recognise your passion. You have to fall in love with it. Once you feel it, you can do it. It could anything; music, art, poetry, theatre, science, filmmaking, tech, writing, anything! You don't have to worry if you haven't encountered your passion, nor d you have to worry if you are in a rough situation and don't know what to pursue.It will come to you. I promise.
xx, The NightingaleĀ
Life will break you. Nobody can protect you from that, and living alone won't either, for solitude will also break you with its yearning. You have to love. You have to feel. It is the reason you are here on earth. You are here to risk your heart. You are here to be swallowed up. And when it happens that you are broken, or betrayed, or left, or hurt, or death brushes near, let yourself sit by an apple tree and listen to the apples falling all around you in heaps, wasting their sweetness. Tell yourself you tasted as many as you could.
Louise Erdrich, The Painted Drum
I got asked out as a joke...?
literally feeling like shit. Iām sorry but if you have ever done this or are planning to do this you are a sick, horrible person. Everyone has emotions, just like you do. Put yourself in the shoes of this person. whoever they may be. Imagine the light blush and the blissful smile on their face after they feel beautiful and liked for who they are. Now slowly imagine that smile fading away and an embarrassed look of dread fading in. I rejected the guy who asked me out before anything else but when i found out it was a joke, i did feel hurt. Maybe they wonāt say anything at first and will laugh it off but at night when unable to sleep or even simply getting bored, this will be the first thing that will come into their head,Ā āwhy am i not good enough?ā and itās the worst feeling ever. I deal with anxiety, and this really made the situation worse. I genuinely feel absolutely p a t h e t i c. To the guy who did this, do you not understand human emotions? I presume not. The saddest part is that i don't even like this guy! I can only imagine what it'll be like if your crush did this to you. Please don't do this.
xx, The Nightingale
Parent Problems
So it's been a while since I last uploaded, but this is a spontaneous spur of the moment thing so let me have this...
Am I the only one who feels that my mother has no time to talk to me anymore?? She has just started work and our time together is less and less everyday. A normal teenager would be thrilled at this but as someone who has an incredibly close relationship with my mom, I'm just done and upset. Whenever she's home she's having these 'secret conversations' with I don't even know whom and it just pisses me off. It's happening to the point where both of us will be talking and she'll just blow me off in the middle of our conversation to chat with this person. This just happened.. I legit feel like crying. Any advice?
xx, The Nightingale
Classic. Song Of The Day
Hurricane Matthew
All who are in the path of Hurricane Matthew, please take the necessary precautions and stay safe. Evacuate the area if you have to. You are in my prayers ā¤ļø
How To Deal When You Miss Someone
So recently my sister left for college to a different country. I have an incredibly close relationship with her so naturally I was quite a mess the following two days. I relates with this post a lot and these are methods I discovered myself, so I though, āHEY!! Why not blog about this? Nightingale, you genius,ā I mean I should be called smart af nightingale. Okay Iām rambling again. Here we go; *puts on glasses*
1. Download all kinds of social media you can find to connect with the person you miss. Take care of time zones if you are thinking of adapting this method. DO NOT wake them up at an ungodly hour of the morning/night.
2. DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT look through old albums of you two and walk into their empty room. You WILL cry. If you choose not pay heed to this warning then donāt say I didnāt warn ya!
3. Play some upbeat music and take a long shower. Dance badly in there, sing off tune, just do mindless stuff and it will keep your mind off of the person.
4. Call up a close friend, tell them the situation and have them cheer you up. Laugh with them about a stupid vine or a random joke and youāll feel better in no time.
5. Go partying. Go to a friendās house. Chill. Have a good time. Youāll forget about it.
6. Have a good long cry at least once. At least your tears will stop once youāre all done. Then youāre free to use all five methods in no particular order. You are now equipped for when you miss someone.
xx, The Nightingale
Song Of The Day
b o y p r o b l e m s
Boys say that girls are complicated, but I disagree completely to that statement. I feel that boys are the most confusing species on the planet.
So basically, I like this boy (letās call him Alex) and his best friend told me a couple of weeks back that he liked me back. So I was like okay cool, thatās nice. I feel on cloud nineā¦ until he goes and starts flirting with another girl. Her best friend and his other best friend come up to me while I was staring at them like the creep I am and the girlās (letās call her Leah) best friend starts gushing about how cute they are. Alexās other best friend casually adds in the fact that he thinks Alex likes her. By this point I am half crestfallen and half livid at the best friend (letās all him Addie) who got my hopes up too high. I donāt say anything to him because there is that flickering hope inside my chest that Addie could still be right. To add more fire to the fuel, my seat was changed, and guess who I was next to? LEAH. At this point I am so confused because half the world is saying he likes me and the other half is saying he does not and I am done. Any advice?
xx, The Nightingale
friends who understand your tears are much more valuable than friends who only know your smile . . .
f r i e n d p r o b l e m s + m e a n r e m a r k s
I have this friend, lets call her Isla. Iāve known her since we were 6. Just last year she came back into my life. Let me start off by giving you background; until last year it had just been my best friend, lets say her name is Lara, and I. Lara had been best friends with this girl since they were in diapers. Theyāre parents were incredibly close and they used to stick to each other like magnets, but time had run its course and they had drifted away. Last year we all were in the same class after years. Isla and I were friends at the tender ages of 6-7, but at the point, she hated me, and I hadnāt even done anything to her. All along she just kept picking on me, kept rubbing it in my face that she knew Lara for longer, and of course gullible Lara just kept seeing her as Godās gift to mankind. She kept falling for her sugar coated words and carefully plotted conversation The more she treated me like dirt, the more anger bubbled in me, and eventually my friendly intentions reciprocated into deep dislike.
It was WWIII every time we were kept in 5 metres radius of each other, which was quite a problem since we had plenty of mutual friends and roamed around in the same group. Eventually we did talk it out and the animosity fizzled away. The tension kept decreasing until there was none left. Today, she is one of my best friends. Itās a really lovely thing. I donāt really know how it happened, but I suppose we realised how much easier it was to just love rather than to hate. Yes, we are not as close to each other as we are individually to Lara, but we do have our days where the only people we can talk to are each other, and I can see we both cherish those moments. She is truly like my sister and I would never trade our friendship for anything. Have you ever had an experienced something like this?? ā”
{ of course I am not saying that having friends who are constantly putting you down every chance they get is good thing, because its not. those few donāt deserve to be called friends. i just thought that since i was lucky enough to experience such a beautiful transition of feelings towards someone, i should share it. if you are going through a situation like this, i do urge you to go speak to them. believe me, once you come clean with your feelings towards each other, you will not have anything to lose; and that could potentially change your entire relationship with the person. you could have a fresh start, you could become OMG BFFFFFS FOREVER AND EVER, or you could never speak to each other again, but at least you tried :p ā¦ right? okay i suck at this advice thing but let me know if it helps you.:) }
xx, The Nightingale
can you be my nightingale? sing to me, i know youāre there ā¦
Demi Lovato, Nightingale
f i r s t p o s t + a n o n o m i t y ā”
You know one of those moments where you get that lightening bolt idea ā¦ everything just seems to fall into place. You just want to do it so badly, it becomes an obsession. This, what you have stumbled upon right now, is infact, what I am talking about. As a child, I was pampered you could say. Treated like a princess by play school peers and all teachers. Then school started and harsh reality kicked in. Suddenly that loved but quiet and shy girl was labelled āweirdā and 'stuck upā. Let me tell you, children can be cruel. No, I wasnāt bullied, per say. No one ever said anything to my face, but you would have to be deaf to not hear the horrible whispers. Keep in mind, at the said time, I was only four. Just goes to show how children can be just as bad, if not worse that the late teens. Some could say that I am too young and all this is not important. That I should be focusing on my studies. I do agree, an education is one of the most important things one could have, but it is not in any way the most important. Your self esteem is always first priority. As a teen or young adult, we can be put down with a number of things; a boy/girl not liking us back, too much acne, not looking your best in front of the public, or even a simple bad hair day. You want to constantly work towards improving those things, and it gets to the point of making your problems your identity. It leaves you with an unquenchable thirst for perfection. An unreasonable and unreachable standard. Enough with the flashbacks, lets get to present time. So I was never any good at sports, and I was in a school where sports were priority. Every p.e. session, every snarky remark, I could feel my confidence dropping till it pretty much hit rock bottom. Maybe Iām just sensitive, maybe Iām fed up. I remember an incident which happened a while back, I had gone to school, it was like any other normal day. Itās not that I am not accepted by my peers and that I am viciously plotted against everyday, I would go as far as saying I was quite popular (just not on the field), but that day had a nightmarish ending for me. As an introvert, I naturally donāt discuss my feelings much, but one day I just lost it. I was done. During home room, a couple of my friends were joking around, and they pretty much ganged up on me, saying that no one liked me and that I was a loner. I guess that was my breaking point. Usually, people would have screamed or gotten angry, but I didnāt. I did the worst thing I could at the point; I cried. I think I was just so fed up by the humiliation and embarrassment, I just lost it (but I did start my period the next day, so maybe that was why.) The point is that all of these break downs/mini panic attacks Iāve been having are scaring me. And the only cause I can figure is that I never got to talk about it. That is why this blog has been born. Here I an share anything behind an anonymous identity. This is my sort of safe haven. We can all be safe in this tiny corner of the internet. If you have to talk, or anything want advice on anything, donāt be afraid to reach. I will be your nightingale if you want, just like you will be mine, although indirectly. I will be your safe haven. xx, The Nightingale