[girldan-pip]

dan is the crow to phil's pigeon

[p1nk-lotus]

[lonergirlmonologue]

"i wonder if we ever think of each other at the same time."

[desultory-suggestions]

It turns out that you can become the person you’ve always envisioned but you’ll still have the person you were before inside of you and you have to treat them with as much forgiveness and love as possible

[whimsicalfairytales]

some of the best comments on dan and phils video

[pseudophan]

dan and phil reveal the truth (but like actually this time)

[unclefather]

see, you and i? we’re like spunchbob and patrice

[judgejudyofficial]

Gay

[unclefather]

that’s his snail

[tonyalmeida]

[thebootydiaries]

Employer: so tell me, why do you want this job?

Me: I must survive capitalism

[meladoodle]

when he licks his lips seductively

[fallingpandas]

what the fuck is that thing?

[meladoodle]

my boyfriend :)

[straightboyfriend]

[goswinding]

Have you ever spent time with miners? – No. My advice: tell the truth. These men work in the dark. They see everything.

Chernobyl (2019), Episode 3 “Open Wide, O Earth”

[goswinding]

There was nothing sane about Chernobyl. What happened there, what happened after, even the good we did, all of it… madness.

Chernobyl (2019), Episode 1 “1:23:45”

[studymedblr]

“These are the pills for my heebee jeebee’s”

— An adorable 90 year old woman describing her anxiety medication

[drpathetique]

*accurately describing

[actuallyjomd]

Patient counseled to come back and see us if she feels “weird and scary.”

– nurse’s note from phone call with patient on new BP med

[rominatrix]

I can’t possibly be the only one that ends up with fucking crumbs inside their bra, huh? Fucking crumbs.

[anxietyproblem]

[quilavastudy]

Doing a cardio exam when you have no idea what you’re listening for is like: ‘yep, I can hear the heart… the heart is pumping. Patient has a heart. Good.’