i'll believe in anything

crazy? i was crazy once.

[the-actuallynot-theorist]

(Intro) What even is this?

So hi, I'm the ActuallyNot theorist. You can call me Theorist or Theo i guess cus my full name's quite long. Imagine me as a crazy opossum that really likes actuallynot. An opossum matpat, if you will. I don't know why I put myself through the hell of trying to figure out actuallynot, but I am. I write theories about actuallynot. Everything, anything, if it's theorizable, god damn it I'm gonna theorize. I do analysis, logical theories, and a few crack theories but they are still formatted like the serious ones. Every theory is valid! Feel free to ask me anything. It can be normal questions, maybe silly ones. Hell, you can ask me to theorize about something/a post (as long as its about actuallynot) if i haven't already. Oh and you can tell me your own theories, I'd love to see other people's perspective on this whole thing! I'm currently attempting to make an Actuallynot proof and implications masterpost, but its taking quite a while, so I make smaller theories in the meantime. Will link those in here later --- Theory Links (to be embedded im lazy) --- The Series: 1. Real Life Meetup 2. Notifications & Surveillance 3. Secret Identity/Actually's Other Identity In the Moment/Flash or Small Analysis Theories - Rhodonite - Stardust Tags: #actuallynot theories - where all of my official theories, crack and serious, will fall under. #i will go insane - upcoming theory, just a silly way of saying it #im going insane - subtag of my theory tag. added in for fun #im going fucking insane - not part of a theory, im probably just going insane. P.S., I don't mind if I end up being shipped with someone, but if i do please keep it lighthearted/not superduper byler-levels serious/at least funny, because I'm aroace. Thanks <3

[the-actuallynot-theorist]

Hi, PHEU reporter again, I'd like to publicly let you know that I am so glad I don't have your job. I thought I was going insane trying to keep up with the facts, but here you are taking the time to read between the lines. I don't know how you're keeping up, good luck.

Insane is my middle name- This is exactly how I felt when i followed a certain... popular theorist back when they were still active - like, I thought I had it bad trying to just get the story straight and here they are making the most strange yet somehow plausible things I've ever seen. I mean, I couldn't say I'm as spectacular as him but we have that guy to blame(or, thank?) for this And I do like to (over)analyze for fun, so while this makes my brain fry sometimes, it's a good way to kill some time. And the obvious trail of implications and clues that two certain blogs leave behind give me the urge to theorize and say something about it, so I guess that's what motivates me? To inform the people and just call attention to all of this wonderfully orchestrated chaos. Then again I'm either the dumbest person on earth who's reading too much into a few words, or I'm not. Maybe I'm onto something... hopefully. I'm honestly glad our jobs go two different directions cause if I had yours I would give up, like, three hours in. You have the true drive of a documenter/reporter, and I have a theorist's lack of a care for their sleep schedule. I have no idea how you do it and keep up with everyone, new and old, but it's pretty damn impressive and inspiring Many thanks for your well wishes, and best of luck to you too, PHEU reporter. I heard recently that a new 'ship' was formed and that someone named actuallynot-might-be-real just arrived on the scene and the multiples multiply - it's definitely getting more interesting around here nowadays.

[binghes-mother]

Matpat mentioned i think..?

[phan-is-not-real]

mmm lovely dirt bury your entire body in it

anon do you want me to call someone

[actuallynot-is-the-same-person]

y'all, i've been busy/asleep and i see a ton of notifs about dirt. are we that bored? what is the lore here?

[the-actuallynot-theorist]

actuallynot's basically so canon we ran out of things to talk/ask about. of all things it's dirt that revives not's ask box i-

[actuallynot-is-the-same-person]

yk what? fair enough lmfao. there's not much else happening while dnp are rehearsing so I support dirt lore

[phan-is-not-real]

mmm lovely dirt bury your entire body in it

anon do you want me to call someone

[actuallynot-is-the-same-person]

y'all, i've been busy/asleep and i see a ton of notifs about dirt. are we that bored? what is the lore here?

[the-actuallynot-theorist]

actuallynot's basically so canon we ran out of things to talk/ask about. of all things it's dirt that revives not's ask box i-

[the-actuallynot-theorist]

that reminds me- i fell asleep looking into the meaning of stardust, so i'll try getting that post up in a few. hours. i dont know it depends on if my brain wants to work with me

[the-actuallynot-theorist]

Hi, PHEU reporter again, I'd like to publicly let you know that I am so glad I don't have your job. I thought I was going insane trying to keep up with the facts, but here you are taking the time to read between the lines. I don't know how you're keeping up, good luck.

Insane is my middle name- This is exactly how I felt when i followed a certain... popular theorist back when they were still active - like, I thought I had it bad trying to just get the story straight and here they are making the most strange yet somehow plausible things I've ever seen. I mean, I couldn't say I'm as spectacular as him but we have that guy to blame(or, thank?) for this And I do like to (over)analyze for fun, so while this makes my brain fry sometimes, it's a good way to kill some time. And the obvious trail of implications and clues that two certain blogs leave behind give me the urge to theorize and say something about it, so I guess that's what motivates me? To inform the people and just call attention to all of this wonderfully orchestrated chaos. Then again I'm either the dumbest person on earth who's reading too much into a few words, or I'm not. Maybe I'm onto something... hopefully. I'm honestly glad our jobs go two different directions cause if I had yours I would give up, like, three hours in. You have the true drive of a documenter/reporter, and I have a theorist's lack of a care for their sleep schedule. I have no idea how you do it and keep up with everyone, new and old, but it's pretty damn impressive and inspiring Many thanks for your well wishes, and best of luck to you too, PHEU reporter. I heard recently that a new 'ship' was formed and that someone named actuallynot-might-be-real just arrived on the scene and the multiples multiply - it's definitely getting more interesting around here nowadays.

[phan-is-actually-real]

✮ ⋆ ˚｡°✩

[the-actuallynot-theorist]

"i guess we're all made of stardust" or whatever not said and THIS THIS THIS FOLLOWINGLDKHDJ???? ok now i need to look into stardusg and more symbolism thank u for giving me new content to publish

[the-actuallynot-theorist]

i think therefore i am... going insane.

[phan-is-not-real]

wud u let actually gift u dirt... thx

#actuallynot... #dirt. #realdirt

wha-

[the-actuallynot-theorist]

thats not a no btw

[phan-is-actually-real]

✮ ⋆ ˚｡°✩

[the-actuallynot-theorist]

"i guess we're all made of stardust" or whatever not said and THIS THIS THIS FOLLOWINGLDKHDJ???? ok now i need to look into stardusg and more symbolism thank u for giving me new content to publish

[phan-is-not-real]

were you outside last night eating dirt?

i was outside, not eating dirt

[the-actuallynot-theorist]

not saw rhe stars with actually or smonrthing its defineily not affectigjhg me in any way

[phan-is-not-real]

do you eat dirt? have you ever eaten dirt? will you eat dirt? when will you eat dirt?

when the fuck did i become The Dirt Guy

[the-actuallynot-theorist]

anons have their priorities straight i guess

[phan-is-not-real]

...

[actuallynot-is-real]

they- they watched the same stars.

[the-actuallynot-theorist]

BRUH I JUST GOT HOME WTF DID I MISS EVEN😭

[phan-is-not-real]

if you were given a teleportation device, what's the first place you would go to?

moon

[the-actuallynot-theorist]

not is gru confirmed or is columbina confirmed no wait not is sandrone confirmed and wants to go to the moon for colu(actually)

[phan-is-not-real]

what’s your favorite song?

creep by radiohead

[the-actuallynot-theorist]

oh im sure.

[dnp-as-things]

DnP as font, if you don’t mind?

OFCC! I had some help with this one from someone who will be helping quite a bit so let's call them clover from now on and I'll tag when they help with a 🍀 emoji :3

Phan as a Font!

(Science Gothic)

Dan and Phil as Fonts!!

(Dan = Comic Neue, Phil Passero One)

[phan-is-not-real]

there’s a certain hope you give to all sceptics of this world so thanks

np i'm always here to question everything

[the-actuallynot-theorist]

Which Could Mean Nothing