If Your Wings Won’t Find You Heaven

I love many bands. A list can be compiled. You can also find me @sleeptokenandghost you can call me STAG. I am a theistic Satanist. Don’t like it? Block me and move along. I collect vinyls and cds! semimultiple/median plural.

[the-local-metalhead]

Mutual tags:

My maw/❤️‍🔥: @frothingatthemaw / @stonedstevie #hiiii mawwww! / #following a blood trail

Vessel/Vess/maw’s Vess/lovely entity/🖤/🌕🌖🌗🌘🌑🌒🌓🌔/⚫️🪽: @gestureintongues #the night comes down like heaven

Banana/🍌: @anotherbananasong #hiiiii banana!

Nick/Baal: @iisdrumroom #drummy paradiddle friend

Sid/🌳: @canopies-of-gold-and-evergreen #the forest folk / #friendsid

Facet/Headmate tags:

Doe: #I have no eye deer

Atlas (?): #to wasteland when the oceans recede

[millenniallust4death]

I’m paying to force seven thousand strangers to see a photo of my late husband having fun with his dog. Tumblr Blaze is totally worth it. XD

[millenniallust4death]

Thank-you to all of my new Internet stranger friends for being so gracious about having my post shoved onto your dashboards. I loved reading all of your kind tags and comments! Both Martin and Bosco have been gone for several years now but for 24 hours, they felt very present in my life. I greatly appreciate this gift. ❤️

[psycorax]

Reblog to have your dashboard be visited by the spirit of joy that death can end but not erase.

[millenniallust4death]

Thank you to everyone who commented in their tags or messaged me. Indeed, today is “Martin and Bosco Day”. I originally whimsically blazed this photo on 13 July 2022. I never expected Martin and Bosco to travel so far and make so many new friends. The experience has been such a gift for me.

[the-local-metalhead]

Atlas is blurred with me at work, and it is in AWE of all the fish and water. It’s actually kinda cute, it’s so excited and wants to know everything.

Also told one of my coworkers. She seemed chill about it.

[cenotaphghuleh]

So, um...

Tobias...

WHAT THE FUCK?!

Source

[the-local-metalhead]

Always my Apollo 😊

Always!

[stonedstevie]

Someone… *side eyes Doe* downloaded threads last night while I thought we were sleeping. Which is interesting because I didn’t think they had so much control over the body, they seemed to be more passive influences. So this was interesting and informative. I guess maybe since I was asleep, they had more control?

that would make sense!!! glad to know you’re figuring new things out :)

[the-local-metalhead]

It’s just like… out of everything… why threads? Lmao

[stonedstevie]

that’s also very true 😭 a wild choice

[the-local-metalhead]

Especially because… I haven’t used insta in months! WHY DOES DOE WANT THREADS OF ALL THINGS?!

And I know for sure it wasn’t an accidental thing because I made sure my phone wasn’t unlocked when I went to bed.

And like. Just why? Why not insta with all the awesome videos and cosplayers?

Doe be confusing the heccies outta me

And I’m getting mildly upset. I think Doe is blurring and is upset that I deleted threads…

Like bro. No one on threads is going to be as normal about whatever the heck we have going on, as they are on tumblr.

[stonedstevie]

and that’s the chaos of being plural ✨

[the-local-metalhead]

I just put on some sleep token and… I think doe likes it, lmaoooo. I just heard a very faint “oooooooh pretty” from somewhere in my head.

At least they’re not upset anymore… as far as I can tell.

[stonedstevie]

sleep token could soothe anything i think :3 i’m happy it works for them!! i’m glad things seem more calm anyways :)

[the-local-metalhead]

Watch as I fall asleep listening to music tonight like I usually do… and end up splitting an introject facet based on a musician or song.

That would genuinely be just my luck.

[stonedstevie]

the amount of times we’ve split because of me watching a new media or something is CRAZY lol. also happened with sleep token… so uhm. don’t be so alarmed if it does happen TvT

(and i’ll be here if you need anything 🫂)

[the-local-metalhead]

Yeah, I know lol, I’m very attached to our Vess. XD.

I swear if I end up with a matching Vessel, I’m gonna die of laughter.

But I also feel songs very much emotionally, so it may come to be that I split a songtive.

[stonedstevie]

i would laugh too to be honest because yeah. that would be ridiculous jhejdjejsjf

even worse if you split an introject of our vess specifically… because we do have introjects of alters from different systems…

[the-local-metalhead]

STOP!

Omg imagine having to explain that to it. Like

“Hi Vess, meet Vess, it’s an introject of you! 😌”

[stonedstevie]

i think he would die laughing and find it absolutely silly 😭 i mean like. this is the creature who has dated another vessel introject before… you can put NOTHING past it, and i mean quite literally nothing. it is a fucking freak of nature LOL

[the-local-metalhead]

I can’t even imagine. Like, our darling entity… dated another vessel introject?

I actually had no idea about that. And find it hilarious.

Imagine we do get an introject and its III though. I would not know how to approach that one, considering how attached Vess is to its source III, and how much it misses him.

But also another silly thing:

Imagine if we split a maw introject. That would be interesting for sure. XD

[stonedstevie]

YOU DIDNT??? oh my god. yeah. that was. A Time. that was why it disappeared the first time, why it was here for a while and then left and then came back again and was different since. yeah. that’s the explanation for that…

but besides it kind of messing him up…, it is quite silly to think about! it’s funny to picture two vessel barbie dolls kissing, the mental imagery is PEAK 😭

oooooof. yeah. i hadn’t considered that possibility. i guess that’s a bridge to cross when push comes to shove? those are two sayings back to back but i hope that makes sense to you lol. i suppose we’ll deal with it if it happens when the time comes, basically is what i’m meaning

OHHHHHHH i had never considered this and i’ve known systems for years now…… wow i’ve never been special enough to someone to be an introject in their system smh (JOKEEEEEEEEE). that’s fucking nuts to think about… it would be incredibly interesting to know how i am perceived in some way

[the-local-metalhead]

THAT SOUNDS LIKE A TIME. I CANT BELIEVE YOU NEVER TOLD ME ABOUT IT.

And yeah. I suppose if it DID happen, I probably wouldn’t know for a bit anyways, and might not even say anything until everything was figured out.

And yes. You are so very special!

[stonedstevie]

Someone… *side eyes Doe* downloaded threads last night while I thought we were sleeping. Which is interesting because I didn’t think they had so much control over the body, they seemed to be more passive influences. So this was interesting and informative. I guess maybe since I was asleep, they had more control?

that would make sense!!! glad to know you’re figuring new things out :)

[the-local-metalhead]

It’s just like… out of everything… why threads? Lmao

[stonedstevie]

that’s also very true 😭 a wild choice

[the-local-metalhead]

Especially because… I haven’t used insta in months! WHY DOES DOE WANT THREADS OF ALL THINGS?!

And I know for sure it wasn’t an accidental thing because I made sure my phone wasn’t unlocked when I went to bed.

And like. Just why? Why not insta with all the awesome videos and cosplayers?

Doe be confusing the heccies outta me

And I’m getting mildly upset. I think Doe is blurring and is upset that I deleted threads…

Like bro. No one on threads is going to be as normal about whatever the heck we have going on, as they are on tumblr.

[stonedstevie]

and that’s the chaos of being plural ✨

[the-local-metalhead]

I just put on some sleep token and… I think doe likes it, lmaoooo. I just heard a very faint “oooooooh pretty” from somewhere in my head.

At least they’re not upset anymore… as far as I can tell.

[stonedstevie]

sleep token could soothe anything i think :3 i’m happy it works for them!! i’m glad things seem more calm anyways :)

[the-local-metalhead]

Watch as I fall asleep listening to music tonight like I usually do… and end up splitting an introject facet based on a musician or song.

That would genuinely be just my luck.

[stonedstevie]

the amount of times we’ve split because of me watching a new media or something is CRAZY lol. also happened with sleep token… so uhm. don’t be so alarmed if it does happen TvT

(and i’ll be here if you need anything 🫂)

[the-local-metalhead]

Yeah, I know lol, I’m very attached to our Vess. XD.

I swear if I end up with a matching Vessel, I’m gonna die of laughter.

But I also feel songs very much emotionally, so it may come to be that I split a songtive.

[stonedstevie]

i would laugh too to be honest because yeah. that would be ridiculous jhejdjejsjf

even worse if you split an introject of our vess specifically… because we do have introjects of alters from different systems…

[the-local-metalhead]

STOP!

Omg imagine having to explain that to it. Like

“Hi Vess, meet Vess, it’s an introject of you! 😌”

[stonedstevie]

i think he would die laughing and find it absolutely silly 😭 i mean like. this is the creature who has dated another vessel introject before… you can put NOTHING past it, and i mean quite literally nothing. it is a fucking freak of nature LOL

[the-local-metalhead]

I can’t even imagine. Like, our darling entity… dated another vessel introject?

I actually had no idea about that. And find it hilarious.

Imagine we do get an introject and its III though. I would not know how to approach that one, considering how attached Vess is to its source III, and how much it misses him.

But also another silly thing:

Imagine if we split a maw introject. That would be interesting for sure. XD

[stonedstevie]

Someone… *side eyes Doe* downloaded threads last night while I thought we were sleeping. Which is interesting because I didn’t think they had so much control over the body, they seemed to be more passive influences. So this was interesting and informative. I guess maybe since I was asleep, they had more control?

that would make sense!!! glad to know you’re figuring new things out :)

[the-local-metalhead]

It’s just like… out of everything… why threads? Lmao

[stonedstevie]

that’s also very true 😭 a wild choice

[the-local-metalhead]

Especially because… I haven’t used insta in months! WHY DOES DOE WANT THREADS OF ALL THINGS?!

And I know for sure it wasn’t an accidental thing because I made sure my phone wasn’t unlocked when I went to bed.

And like. Just why? Why not insta with all the awesome videos and cosplayers?

Doe be confusing the heccies outta me

And I’m getting mildly upset. I think Doe is blurring and is upset that I deleted threads…

Like bro. No one on threads is going to be as normal about whatever the heck we have going on, as they are on tumblr.

[stonedstevie]

and that’s the chaos of being plural ✨

[the-local-metalhead]

I just put on some sleep token and… I think doe likes it, lmaoooo. I just heard a very faint “oooooooh pretty” from somewhere in my head.

At least they’re not upset anymore… as far as I can tell.

[stonedstevie]

sleep token could soothe anything i think :3 i’m happy it works for them!! i’m glad things seem more calm anyways :)

[the-local-metalhead]

Watch as I fall asleep listening to music tonight like I usually do… and end up splitting an introject facet based on a musician or song.

That would genuinely be just my luck.

[stonedstevie]

the amount of times we’ve split because of me watching a new media or something is CRAZY lol. also happened with sleep token… so uhm. don’t be so alarmed if it does happen TvT

(and i’ll be here if you need anything 🫂)

[the-local-metalhead]

Yeah, I know lol, I’m very attached to our Vess. XD.

I swear if I end up with a matching Vessel, I’m gonna die of laughter.

But I also feel songs very much emotionally, so it may come to be that I split a songtive.

[stonedstevie]

i would laugh too to be honest because yeah. that would be ridiculous jhejdjejsjf

even worse if you split an introject of our vess specifically… because we do have introjects of alters from different systems…

[the-local-metalhead]

STOP!

Omg imagine having to explain that to it. Like

“Hi Vess, meet Vess, it’s an introject of you! 😌”

[stonedstevie]

Someone… *side eyes Doe* downloaded threads last night while I thought we were sleeping. Which is interesting because I didn’t think they had so much control over the body, they seemed to be more passive influences. So this was interesting and informative. I guess maybe since I was asleep, they had more control?

that would make sense!!! glad to know you’re figuring new things out :)

[the-local-metalhead]

It’s just like… out of everything… why threads? Lmao

[stonedstevie]

that’s also very true 😭 a wild choice

[the-local-metalhead]

Especially because… I haven’t used insta in months! WHY DOES DOE WANT THREADS OF ALL THINGS?!

And I know for sure it wasn’t an accidental thing because I made sure my phone wasn’t unlocked when I went to bed.

And like. Just why? Why not insta with all the awesome videos and cosplayers?

Doe be confusing the heccies outta me

And I’m getting mildly upset. I think Doe is blurring and is upset that I deleted threads…

Like bro. No one on threads is going to be as normal about whatever the heck we have going on, as they are on tumblr.

[stonedstevie]

and that’s the chaos of being plural ✨

[the-local-metalhead]

I just put on some sleep token and… I think doe likes it, lmaoooo. I just heard a very faint “oooooooh pretty” from somewhere in my head.

At least they’re not upset anymore… as far as I can tell.

[stonedstevie]

sleep token could soothe anything i think :3 i’m happy it works for them!! i’m glad things seem more calm anyways :)

[the-local-metalhead]

Watch as I fall asleep listening to music tonight like I usually do… and end up splitting an introject facet based on a musician or song.

That would genuinely be just my luck.

[stonedstevie]

the amount of times we’ve split because of me watching a new media or something is CRAZY lol. also happened with sleep token… so uhm. don’t be so alarmed if it does happen TvT

(and i’ll be here if you need anything 🫂)

[the-local-metalhead]

Yeah, I know lol, I’m very attached to our Vess. XD.

I swear if I end up with a matching Vessel, I’m gonna die of laughter.

But I also feel songs very much emotionally, so it may come to be that I split a songtive.

[stonedstevie]

Someone… *side eyes Doe* downloaded threads last night while I thought we were sleeping. Which is interesting because I didn’t think they had so much control over the body, they seemed to be more passive influences. So this was interesting and informative. I guess maybe since I was asleep, they had more control?

that would make sense!!! glad to know you’re figuring new things out :)

[the-local-metalhead]

It’s just like… out of everything… why threads? Lmao

[stonedstevie]

that’s also very true 😭 a wild choice

[the-local-metalhead]

Especially because… I haven’t used insta in months! WHY DOES DOE WANT THREADS OF ALL THINGS?!

And I know for sure it wasn’t an accidental thing because I made sure my phone wasn’t unlocked when I went to bed.

And like. Just why? Why not insta with all the awesome videos and cosplayers?

Doe be confusing the heccies outta me

And I’m getting mildly upset. I think Doe is blurring and is upset that I deleted threads…

Like bro. No one on threads is going to be as normal about whatever the heck we have going on, as they are on tumblr.

[stonedstevie]

and that’s the chaos of being plural ✨

[the-local-metalhead]

I just put on some sleep token and… I think doe likes it, lmaoooo. I just heard a very faint “oooooooh pretty” from somewhere in my head.

At least they’re not upset anymore… as far as I can tell.

[stonedstevie]

sleep token could soothe anything i think :3 i’m happy it works for them!! i’m glad things seem more calm anyways :)

[the-local-metalhead]

Watch as I fall asleep listening to music tonight like I usually do… and end up splitting an introject facet based on a musician or song.

That would genuinely be just my luck.

[the-local-metalhead]

Reading Dante’s inferno while listening to Sleep Token, Ghost, and Powerwolf is certainly a choice… and one that I have made lol.

I think doe is bored and annoyed by the archaic language though, lol. I might have to bring out the phone dictionary, since idk if I can communicate with it directly, even when we’re blurred.

[stonedstevie]

Someone… *side eyes Doe* downloaded threads last night while I thought we were sleeping. Which is interesting because I didn’t think they had so much control over the body, they seemed to be more passive influences. So this was interesting and informative. I guess maybe since I was asleep, they had more control?

that would make sense!!! glad to know you’re figuring new things out :)

[the-local-metalhead]

It’s just like… out of everything… why threads? Lmao

[stonedstevie]

that’s also very true 😭 a wild choice

[the-local-metalhead]

Especially because… I haven’t used insta in months! WHY DOES DOE WANT THREADS OF ALL THINGS?!

And I know for sure it wasn’t an accidental thing because I made sure my phone wasn’t unlocked when I went to bed.

And like. Just why? Why not insta with all the awesome videos and cosplayers?

Doe be confusing the heccies outta me

And I’m getting mildly upset. I think Doe is blurring and is upset that I deleted threads…

Like bro. No one on threads is going to be as normal about whatever the heck we have going on, as they are on tumblr.

[stonedstevie]

and that’s the chaos of being plural ✨

[the-local-metalhead]

I just put on some sleep token and… I think doe likes it, lmaoooo. I just heard a very faint “oooooooh pretty” from somewhere in my head.

At least they’re not upset anymore… as far as I can tell.

[stonedstevie]

Someone… *side eyes Doe* downloaded threads last night while I thought we were sleeping. Which is interesting because I didn’t think they had so much control over the body, they seemed to be more passive influences. So this was interesting and informative. I guess maybe since I was asleep, they had more control?

that would make sense!!! glad to know you’re figuring new things out :)

[the-local-metalhead]

It’s just like… out of everything… why threads? Lmao

[stonedstevie]

that’s also very true 😭 a wild choice

[the-local-metalhead]

Especially because… I haven’t used insta in months! WHY DOES DOE WANT THREADS OF ALL THINGS?!

And I know for sure it wasn’t an accidental thing because I made sure my phone wasn’t unlocked when I went to bed.

And like. Just why? Why not insta with all the awesome videos and cosplayers?

Doe be confusing the heccies outta me

And I’m getting mildly upset. I think Doe is blurring and is upset that I deleted threads…

Like bro. No one on threads is going to be as normal about whatever the heck we have going on, as they are on tumblr.

[the-local-metalhead]

would you guys want your own tags?? or would you rather me use the one stag tag for everyone? just thought about this while tagging our conversation in reblogs ^^;

So sweet of you to ask. I think for at least right now, one tag is fine. Especially because it really does seem like everyone else isn’t fully formed individuals.

[stonedstevie]

Someone… *side eyes Doe* downloaded threads last night while I thought we were sleeping. Which is interesting because I didn’t think they had so much control over the body, they seemed to be more passive influences. So this was interesting and informative. I guess maybe since I was asleep, they had more control?

that would make sense!!! glad to know you’re figuring new things out :)

[the-local-metalhead]

It’s just like… out of everything… why threads? Lmao

[the-local-metalhead]

… who downloaded threads last night while I thought we were sleeping???

I haven’t even used threads in like a year!

*stares pointedly at Doe*

-STAG

[the-local-metalhead]

look! it’s the guy ever!!! :3

STEALING IT STEALING IT STEALING IT

Did I show you the one I got recently???

I’ve been listening to Sleep token a lot lately. Not that I don’t listen to them normally, but now it’s like… I’m ONLY listening to them. I guess it’s cause I miss our Vess. (Is it okay if I call it that?)

I mean I know it’s not it. That’s literally not the same being. But… it just makes me feel closer to it, when it isn’t around. And I’ve kinda been having a rough time without it. I just… am sad thinking about the time that’s passed… I miss it so.

I also kept forgetting to ask, is Vess’ voice as pretty as its source? For scientific purposes of course. (It’s actually not. I just miss it so much that I want to know everything about it.) and I can’t believe I never asked this… but what’s its favorite color???

[stonedstevie]

i’m usually picky about merch with vessel’s face on it but i like this shirt i have a lot and the hoodie i have :) i really do like yours too though… stealing it lol

i’ve oddly not been listening to sleep token a lot lately. i’ve been listening to a certain playlist that i’ve been looping which is basically just fob and p!atd. i miss sleep token but i think their music is too heavy for me at the moment with everything that’s happening with me. too much to handle

i’m sorry that vess not being here is causing you pain. i wish i could make it appear. i miss him too. my life would be so much easier with it around. but it’s a very unfortunate reality that my/our brain likes to cause us pain, and therefore against my/our wishes, others pain too. i’m sorry you have to be part of that. i wish i could make things change, i really do. i wish it were simple and easy. i’m sorry.

do you mean its speaking voice or singing voice? because both are a little varied. depending on which you mean, i can explain more if you want to dm me about it or send me an ask about it or ask in a reblog of this. singing voice is more accurate than speaking. and its favorite color is surprisingly a deep blue, like a deep ocean blue. he also likes blood red but blue is its favorite favorite

[the-local-metalhead]

Not me being an idiot and accidentally just hitting the reblog now button lol.

I’m also getting a backpack, because the rocksax I have now is falling apart lol.

Please don’t feel bad, I understand. At least we have each other! (Also you didn’t answer my question lol. Is it okay if I refer to it as our Vess? It’s totally fine if not, I wanted to ask because I know you two are together.)

I’ve actually never heard vessel’s (source) speak, even though his identity was unfortunately spoiled for me by googles ai overview, so I wouldn’t know what to compare it to.

And omg I love that for it. I’ll make sure to send it some pretty blue pictures when it comes back!

[stonedstevie]

i literally just did the same thing TvT

oooooo that’s nice :))) i remember seeing something the other day that i hadn’t seen before and wanted it and now i can’t remember what it was… but it’s cool what revolver magazine has of sleep token merch :)

i completely skipped over that, sorry. brain is still in a weird space, please look over me lol. but that’s completely fine. vess is polyam so i cannot have hold over it in any way, it’s his choices and comfort level, but i do know that it’s comfy with you so. all is good, promise

ahhhhhh, i thought you were one of the people who i had talked about that sort of thing with. my bad for lapse in memory ^^; i wouldn’t know what to compare it to either, and i wouldn’t say any of that publicly or without consent anyways. i will say vess’ voice is deeper than you’d think from its singing voice lol. it’s interesting for sure

mhm yeah it loves the ocean too, especially at night. he really loves night ocean paintings and even more so when the moon is in them. very vess. but thank you for wanting to always connect with it and that you always think of it. some part of him stays alive because of you :)

[the-local-metalhead]

I… it’s comfy with me? 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹

I mean yeah I knew that lol. But it’s so nice to hear it confirmed.

Deep voice Vess? Oooooh.

And I will never stop wanting to connect with it… it’s an incredible entity/being and I ADORE IT.