i really love bats

whoever made me lives in fear of what ive become

[skellydun]

What's your stance on the issues?

on every single one?

[averruncusho]

Tumblr be like

[textsfromhetalians]

me, 11 chapters deep in a 25 chapter slowburn fic at 2 am, eyes burning and the phone keeps slipping out of my fingers:

[daree-to-dream]

Every girl has had the experience where a creepy guy asks for our number and we don’t want to give it to him, but we also don’t want to get gutted in a back alley. “Give him a fake number!” I hear you call, okay and then he says “okay let me call you real quick!” Because they are learning. “Give them your number and then block them!” Okay and then they can plug it into something like Spokeo, pay $10 and know everything about you. So what do you do?

First pick a fake name, I use Jessica, then download the Google Voice app, hook it up to your email, pick a number, and set up a fake greeting with your fake name. You can set it to ring your actual phone like a normal call or text but they don’t have real info on you.

Go forth and don’t get murdered, ladies!

[luckys-horseshoe-deactivated202]

Everyone reblog this post.

[322]

crush anon to lovers (slow burn)

[dopethrone-deactivated20241028]

[niggazinmoscow]

I’ll drink to that

[weirdmageddon]

dude kevin the sea cucumbers “hat” was actually his nuts and his goons fucking ripped it off

[weirdmageddon]

[celtic-pyro-deactivated20230725]

This scene is...much more disturbing in context now.

[libertarirynn-deactivated202006]

Let’s not forget SpongeBob was created by a marine biologist. I doubt this was an accident.

[bax16]

[parakeet]

its sad that people in real life don’t tend to have idle animations. i know i do. i love to wiggle and look around for no reason

[parakeet]

You: Still as a gotdamn statue… Me:

[fineillsignup]

me waiting at starbucks for my iced peppermint mocha

[yupthatexists]

[elodieunderglass]

NO BUT THESE ARE THE THINGS I WAS TALKING ABOUT HERE: https://elodieunderglass.tumblr.com/post/185703978243/okay-so-we-all-agree-lawns-suck-are-outdated-and

See how the slyly worded, rather weaselly marketing claim for CityTrees claiming that these panels of moss contain “The cleaning power of 275 trees” got changed, in people’s minds, to “each panel of moss ABSORBS AS MUCH CARBON DIOXIDE as 275 trees”, a completely ridiculous and impossible claim?? And then see how people immediately decided that moss is therefore somehow more “eco” than trees and that “moss lawns” will magically solve global warming? See how everyone did that, by themselves? The important facts, like ‘when plants absorb carbon dioxide, they release the oxygen and use the carbon for their own construction; therefore, plants only absorb as much carbon as they physically need to grow’ have been utterly discarded in the rush to believe something more viral and exciting.

One sly bit of marketing that the public has been widely encouraged to misinterpret, verbally repeated from a random person to a random Guardian blogger at a garden show, who blogged about it as if it was a fact, has now gotten so scrambled that people on tumblr honestly believe that 12 square meters of moss absorbs as much carbon dioxide as 275 trees.

These screencaps show the actual claims about the CityTrees, which are that the moss, having a lot of surface area for its mass, can filter the particles in air pollutants more efficiently than equivalent-sized plants that are smoother.

You will see the effects of this for years. Years from now, people will insist that moss has the ability to simply erase carbon molecules from the universe. And you’ll know differently, but because it won’t match what people prefer to believe, nobody will listen to you.

[ilookextremelygood-deactivated2]

just a heads up, if i ever weird you out on any level, too friendly, too flirty, anything at all, i encourage you to be very vocal towards me about it to make sure i dont continue to make you uncomfortable. i dont want anyone feeling like im not someone they can trust and be comfortable around.

[awfullydull-deactivated20170619]

Normalize vocalizing discomfort.

Last weekend, a guy that at that point I’d known for about 24 hours called me “darling“. I could tell he didn’t mean anything by it, but I (politely) asked that he not do that because I don’t like it. He looked surprised and got a little defensive - “oh, I call all my friends that!“ “Okay, well I’d still rather you didn’t“ “oh well harumph harumph sorry”

whereas the exchange should have gone

“blah blah blah, darling“

“oh please don’t call me that, I don’t care for that“

“oh I’m sorry, I won’t do that“ CONTINUE CONVERSATION

Normalize vocalizing discomfort.

[pathosohso]

Yep yep yep. I’ve literally had people give me weird looks because I correct them when they try to shorten my name. My own family members don’t call me by any nickname.

[notthe-latte-hottay]

I use pet names constantly. If you don’t like it, Please Please tell me!

[izzycle]

Please! I’m a friendly person and use lovely, poppet, darling, etc frequently and I never want to make people uncomfortable!

[marshmallowmischief]

if i make you uncomfortable, for pete’s sake tell me!!

so many of my followers are minors, and i use pet names such as “kiddo, sweetheart, sweet pea, darling, honey, etc” all the time

it is my responsibility to make you feel welcome and safe on my blog, and if anything i do comes off as making you uncomf, then  t e l l  m e

[lesbiankatebush]

sexyback over the beat of seven nation army

[lesbiankatebush]

i’m bringing sexy back a seven nation army couldn’t hold me back

[stsebastiens]

this post gave me whiplash

[theshippingroyalty]

It already exists guys

[tobuscus]

[thatfunnyblog]

AND WHAT!?!

[cvntyeonjun]

when ur hanging out in ur apartment u’ve got some candles lit ur feeling good u’ve had 8 glasses of wine then down in the street u hear two beautiful boys skateboarding or doing flips or something so u invite them up and they say where’s the bed and they ask if they can sit on the bed and u tell them sure but the sheets are expensive japanese linen and they tell u they’re not even soft:

[dragondicks]

[ancient egyptian dude sees another dude painting hieroglyphics] oh man you made anubis look super hot, are you open for commissions

[sunshinewoman]

Seen in my school’s bathroom

[kiyokospeaks]

The tumblr version of russian roulette is when you find a good post and realize theres like 50 unnecessary comments under it so you go to reblog it from the person before the first unnecessary comment and hope to god they’re not a freak

[kiyokospeaks]

if you get this you lost

[papershroud]

[min0uet]

regret.mp4

[head-in-the-bubbles]

“OH RIGHT HE WAS A WRESTLER”

[himejoshikomaeda]

invader zim filmed this

[hatsunemikuwu]

Y’all these are the actors who are in the Spongebob Squarepants broadway musical that Plankton trying to knock down Spongebob

[the-privateer]

that context makes is 10000X funnier

[that-twink-over-there]

The Invader Zim laugh SENT ME

[we-are-the-reckless-youthhhh]

[explanatorypower-deactivated201]

i dont understand this at all and america scares the fuck out of me

[free-market-pluralist-deactivat]

This is the america they don’t want you to see

[robloxgf-deactivated20190515]

i love america

[dalaisa-katili-deactivated20170]

This is what you call Waffle House at 2 am when the bars close and everyone is drunk and hungry

[rasec-wizzlbang-blog]

*group of people having fun* this site: wtf this is so scary

[wilfulwayfarer-deactivated20220]

People having safe fun at a waffle house is scary for most Tumblr bloggers, reports say.

[inkandcayenne]

Some context for those not familiar with Waffle House Culture: 

Waffle House is one of the few chains in America that’s open 24/7/365, and where you can get both breakfast and lunch/dinner options at any time (I have had so many Breakfast Cheeseburgers at Waffle Houses). The food is really good, and people eat there at all times of the day or night, but it’s particularly popular as a late-night post-drinking spot because it’s all that’s open and it’s the kind of food that tastes especially good when you’re hammered.

Part of Waffle House Protocol is that all the servers and cooks greet every single customer as they come through the door. It sounds lame, but I’ve never been to a Waffle House where that greeting didn’t feel completely heartfelt. My mom is a health nut who could barely find anything on the menu she was willing to eat and yet she describes the Christmas Day lunch we had there one year as one of the nicest meals she’s ever had because everyone was so warm and welcoming. That sense of camaraderie gets turned up to 11, of course, at 2 a.m. when everyone’s shitfaced.

The jukeboxes have Waffle-House-themed songs on them (once you have heard “Raisins in my Toast” you will be earwormed forever) and there is an arcane system of hash brown ordering: scattered, smothered, covered, chunked, topped, diced, peppered, and/or capped. The hot sauce bottles say “Casa de Waffle.” 

Once, in Oxford (UK), my husband and I walked past a kebab van very late one night and he said “why do I smell Waffle House”

The location of most Waffle Houses means there’s some… classism that tends to get tied up with Anti-Waffle House Discourse, which is probably lending itself, in part, to this being such a fraught topic. (I’m looking at a map and apparently I was born and raised right in the middle of the Peak Waffle House Density Zone)

It is, in the words of chef Anthony Bourdain, “indeed marvelous— an irony-free zone where everything is beautiful and nothing hurts; where everybody regardless of race, creed, color or degree of inebriation is welcomed.”

[postmarxed]

We’re not even gonna mention FEMA’s Waffle House Index where they determine how bad a natural disaster is by calling the local Waffle House to see if they’re open?

[pooraurora]

#and wafflehouse is one of those spiritual places#2am friendships#its the same hazy feel#of cicadas and front porches with your friends