just a gremlin taking out the trash

27 ~ she/her ~ australian ~ get ready to enjoy whatever my current fixation is

[ozempicofficial]

[darlingofdots]

a selection of photos taken by other people from their first year of marriage:

towards the end of their wedding reception, sun setting, looking rumpled and tired, Ilya kissing Shane's palm while Shane is very seriously talking to Scott Hunter

the two of them with a fan, taken at the dog park, Ilya holding Anya and Shane with one arm around his husband's shoulder and the other trying to prevent Anya from licking the fan's face

Shane Hollander sitting on the Centaurs bench with blood on his face, mouth wide open, Ilya Rozanov gripping his chin and glaring at the gap where Shane's bottom canine used to be

Ilya Rozanov with his fist in the air after a goal, a smear of red in the corner of his mouth

sitting next to each other at team tape review, heads bent together, Ilya's hand on Shane's thigh, Shane's hands sketching out a play in the air

Ilya Rozanov leaning against his car in the airport arrivals line, a coffee in one hand and a forest-green smoothie in the other

Shane Hollander giving his husband the middle finger after losing the shot accuracy competition at ASG by half a second

piggyback racing across the yard with a Pike twin each clinging to their necks

Ilya Rozanov, outraged, with a face full of snow, as his husband doubles over with laughter

wearing identical blank expressions the seventeenth time a journalist asks about their "off-ice chemistry"

Shane Hollander throwing his head back and cackling in a booth at a random dive bar in a random city, Ilya Rozanov grinning into his drink

asleep on the team bus after game 5 of the conference finals, Ilya curled into Shane's shoulder

[iwrotemrtambourineman]

ilya in the other books is going, “I see that you’re gay. I see that you like this person. I see that you are miserable. You should do something about that.” and he stands there and waits for someone else to say that they notice him too and nobody ever does.

[firstprinced]

#he wants to bite shane SO BAD

[peachyjude]

no okay i do want to talk about shane drumming his fingers on the gearshift on the way to face his parents only for ilya to cover his hand with his own, and then we see shane in the rearview, tears in his eyes, shutting his eyes briefly. and it’s like we see him recenter under ilya’s touch, be still. and i think a lot about how hudson described shane’s relationship with yuna as clinical — she loves him, yes, more than anything, but there’s a distance there; emotions are hands-off. david seems loving but removed as well. it’s likely shane never had anyone to properly sit with him in his anxiousness, in his fear, he always had to suffer it in silence. and it’s like. here comes ilya rozanov, saying, do you want me to come with you? yes it’s scary, but you’re brave. maybe they didn’t even notice. ilya pulls shane from the ether, guides him to wrap his arms around him instead. he lets shane slide to the floor and clutch at him, press himself into his body in a way that brings him comfort. he grounds him, gives him something to anchor himself to, gives him a place to unravel. shane’s walked alone for years and years, has learned how to buck up and go through things on his own. and ilya tells him he doesn’t have to. like. ever since we were 17, i’ve wanted to be where you are, to go where you go. just say the word. of course i will go with you. i’m right here. i’m always going to be right here.

[clytemnestraaa]

if Hayden hadn’t outed them publicly how do you think they’d go about it after getting married ?

tastefully worded borderline ambiguous post on shane’s instagram featuring photos of them together on various scenic hikes standing at least 3 feet apart in every shot. followed by a tourist’s photo of them in ibiza with ilya with the worst sunburn of his life fully lobster red with both hands down the back of shane’s swim trunks grabbing his bare ass. followed by a tweet published on ilya’s twitter at 3:31am and deleted at 4:47am that reads YES I SUCK COCK YOUR MOTHER WAS GREAT TEACHER

[bipolar4autistic]

Ilya’s first summer in Boston

[charl0ttan]

im glad we're in the internet backwaters i think if dove chocolate or something replied to my post i would just keep reporting them for terorism again and again and again

[heich0e]

love men who fall into "my girl is mad at me i hope i die" category but who also regularly do things to piss their girl off. duality of man

[lavenderprose]

To be clear. Shane's whole thing about Ilya being a Sex God is because of the limerence. Ilya is nineteen and he can get a rhythm going and that's about it. He was throwing shit at the wall when he hit that 'Get on your knees' in Nashville but only he knows that because Shane's brain turned OFF. Ilya said "Let's do a little experiment here" and the results were "Oh my god oh my god oh my god." Shane came hands free because he was that obsessed with the idea of Ilya Rozanov being inside him. Ilya said "Do you like that do you like that" because he's nineteen and he needs the validation and Shane was like "YES YES YES I LIKE IT OH MY GOD YOU'RE SO DEEP YOU'RE SO GOOD" and objectively. It was okay. Ilya fully did not know where to put his hands a couple of times. He forgot about Shane's dick. Luckily, Shane is God's special angel who can come from the idea of Ilya's cockhead being in proximity to his prostate a few times. Mind over matter, says Shane Hollander's dick. And then Ilya said "Oh God Hollander" because it was also, objectively, one of the hottest things that had ever happened to HIM, Ilya Rozanov. Shane sits on that step afterwards plotting about how he's gonna get this over and over and over again for the rest of his life and he has no idea that there are women in Boston who have Ilya listed in their contacts as "Hockey Guy 6/10". Shane Hollander cannot fathom a world in which Ilya Rozanov doesn't lay the maddest pipe this side of Lake Michigan. "Ilya Rozanov is a some kind of nineteen year old sex God" No Shane honey he was just designed in a lab to score goals and make you cum and he's done scoring goals for the night.

[dragon-in-a-fez]

does the body ALWAYS have to keep the score? maybe we could just have a friendly game this time. maybe we can just have fun without putting numbers on it

[cuppydogshane]

Ilya would vibe w addison rae music i think. he would say wow is true myshane.... when we drive in your car Im your Baby

[2886beaconstreet]

you know ilya was absolutely terrorizing the boston locker room with this song for like a decade straight

[corvophobia]

was in a painting mood

[gaygoatshane]

ilya promising children cash if they win knowing he's gonna let them win and then asking shane for money because he doesn't have his wallet. he wasn't even an annoying husband yet but he was letting shane know his potential

[littlespoonevan]

I want a fic where the hr universe has its own gay hockey show called break the ice or something and it takes the internet by storm so suddenly games and practices are being infiltrated by social media managers trying to get the players to say if they’ve watched it or who on the team they’d cast in the show and fans of the show who are also hockey rpfers are talking about the main couple of the show being like ‘this is hollanov if u squint’ and Ilya is having the time of his life bc he thinks it’s the best show he’s ever seen in his entire life and Shane is having 1000 mini heart attacks every day bc he legitimately believes someone has figured out he and Ilya are dating and decided to make a tv show about it and of all the ways he thought he could end up getting outed this was never on the spreadsheet

[littlespoonevan]

the writers of break the ice reach out to rose about playing one of the character's beards for a few eps and when shane finds out he demands yuna hire a private investigator to see if he's being followed

[littlespoonevan]

the real plot twist is that the characters in the show lowkey look like hayden and cliff so this starts this big, long-running joke that hayden and marleau are in a secret relationship and hayden and cliff - who know the Truth(tm) - are like 'guys this is great we can take the heat off you two' and ilya doesn't care bc it means he can call hayden pike ugly to the press and be like 'um no my handsome, funny, smart friend is MUCH too good for hayden pike' meanwhile shane is lowkey and irrationally FURIOUS bc what the FUCK do you mean people are calling hayden and marley Cute when he and ilya are right fucking there?!?!?!?!?

[cuppydogshane]

hudson williams loved shane so hard that he ensouled him its a bit crazy we saw soul magic happen on television and its just allowed