I can't eat lately. I don't even know why, it could be meds, it could be health, it could be my 3d, it could be fucking God for all I know but I just can't. And I'm so happy about it, but at the same time I am in so much pain, and constantly trying to hide it feels like it's killing me
Idk how to explain it but the 3d tumblr and twitter communities just give completely different vibes, and the one tumblr gives is just way more comforting to me. Like 3dtwit kinda feels like a clique I'm standing on the edge of, desperately trying to be involved with, and tumblr is more of a warm hug. I love 3dtumblr <3
Reducing the frequency, severity, and proper first-aid/wound care can help reduce the harm from self-harm when you are unable to or don’t want to quite completely. This guide talks about harm reduction for multiple methods of non-suicidal self-harm, not just cutting.
You can find more information on harm reduction for self-harm on this blog or my website.
For more resources, check this page
Trigger warning: talk about self-harm, including methods, tools, and descriptions of wounds for the purpose of harm reduction. Brief mentions of alcohol, drug use, mention of fatphobia, and eating disorders
Before You Self-Harm
[Pt: Before You Self-Harm]
Safe Kits and First-Aid Kits
[Pt: Safe Kits and Firs-Aid Kits]
A safe kit is what its called when you keep first-aid supplies with what you use to self-harm, what you use to clean your tool, things to use instead of self-harm, or anything else that helps you be safer when you self-harm or have self-harm urges.
Here are some ideas for things to put in a safe kit...
First-aid supplies (see the "Caring for Injures" section)
Clean tools for self-harm
If you use blades or something sharp, a metal or hard plastic container to put used sharps in (like a empty pill bottle or sharps container), throwing away blades lose or flushing them down the toilet put sanitation workers at risk.
Isopropyl/rubbing alcohol for cleaning tools
Information on first-aid
Self-harm report card, “this report card can be used if seeking treatment for an injury – for example given to health professionals”
A list of things that you could do instead of self-harming
A list of reasons not to self-harm/take care of your wounds/practice harm reduction
A journal
A list of people you could talk to for support
Comfort items, like a small stuffie
Things to express yourself with, like art supplies
Infection Prevention
[Pt: Infection Prevention]
Infections can be life threatening and severe, even if they start out mild. Some ways that can reduce the risk of infection are...
Being up to date with vaccines (like the tetanus vaccine)
Never sharing tools
Not re-using tools if you self-harm in a way that breaks skin (i.e. cutting, burning)
If you do reuse tools, cleaning them before/after use by boiling them in water (~15 minutes) or soaking them in something with a high alcohol contents (i.e. isopropyl/rubbing alcohol, hard liquor, hand sanitiser), remember to dry well
Check your tools for rust, dirt, or cracking before use. Dispose if any found
Store tools in a clean, dry place; do not use something to self-harm if it was or could have been in an unclean place
Do not use the tools you use to self-harm for anything else
Clean your hands before self-harming, if you pick your skin/scabs, cleaning under your nails
Keep cuts, burns, and other open wounds covered with wound dressings. Changes dressings daily
Disinfect the area with an antiseptic (like isopropyl alcohol) before harming yourself
Having a healthy diet; malnourishment increases your risk of getting an infection and slows healing. This is especially important to remember if you have an eating disorder
Where/How You Self-Harm
[Pt: Where/How you Self-harm]
The location of where you hurt yourself can significantly reduce or increase the risk of long-term damage, regardless of how you self-harm. Avoid harming:
Joints or near them
Your face, head, or neck
Under side of your wrist
Hands
Your groin
On scars
Internally (e.g. overdosing/self poising or swallowing something), there is no way to see how severe internal damage is by yourself and you should always seek medical attention for internal damage.
Areas with veins, arteries, or major nerves (see below)
Areas with more fat are generally safer.
Nerves, Arteries, and Veins
[Pt: Nerves, Arteries, and Veins]
[Image description 1: a diagram of arteries and veins in the human body.
Image description 2: a diagram of nerves in the human body /end ID]
Arteries and veins are the two largest types of blood vessels, they carry blood to and from the heart. Arteries and veins can be damaged from cutting, burning, hitting yourself, and other forms of self-harm. Damage to an artery causes serious bleeding that can be fatal in minutes and always need immediate emergency medical attention, venous bleeding is less serious but can also be fatal and usually needs medical attention. Bleeding can be internal and isn't always immediately obvious. The above diagram on the left shows the location of veins and arteries in the body so you can avoid them. You can find more detailed diagrams of specific body parts online by Googling "blood vessels in [body part]" and looking at images. You can learn more about different types of blood vessels and bleeding here.
Alcohol, some drugs/medications, and some medical conditions (like haemophilia) can make bleeding harder to stop and increases the risk of bruising and internal bleeding. It is important to avoid using drugs or alcohol when self-harming since increased bleeding can be a significant risk, if you take medications or have a medical condition that can increase bleeding, and are able to, talk to your doctor.
Nerves are what send signals through our bodies so that we can feel things and move. Some nerves also control things that you aren't aware of, like you're organs. Nerves can be damaged from cutting, burning, hitting yourself, or other forms of self-harm and damage to nerves can make it harder or impossible to move or feel things. The above diagram on the right shows the location of larger nerves in the body so you know how to avoid them. You can find more detailed diagrams of specific body parts online by Googling "nerves in [body part]" and looking at images. You can learn more about nerves and nerve damage here.
Nerves, veins, arteries, and tendons (what connects your muscles to your bones so you can move) usually all point in the same direction and, if you cut, cutting in the same direction makes you less likely to damage them. For example on your arms this would be vertically.
Severity of Injures
[Pt: Severity of Injures]
Larger, deeper, or more sever injuries carry more risk of severe bleeding, nerve damage, and tendon/ligament damage. If your able to, self-harming in a way that levels fewer, smaller, shallower, and less sever injuries is a good way to significantly reduce harm.
If you hit yourself to self-harm, using a pillow, folded clothes, a helmet, or something will reduce the severity of injures
Using drugs or alcohol when self-harming can make it harder to respond to emergencies or make them more likely to happen so avoiding drugs while self-harming is much safer.
Reducing Frequency and Avoiding Self-Harm
[Pt: Reducing Frequency and Avoiding Self-Harm]
Avoiding self-harm, even if you don't quit entirely, is a one of the best ways of reducing risks from self-harm. This is a short guide for where to start if you want to quit self-harm.
Finding the Why
[Pt: Finding the Why]
Understanding why you self-harm can be important when trying to find how to stop or reduce self-harming. The Hurt Yourself Less Workbook (edited to remove some fatphobic language + images of self-harm, original here) is a work book to help you explore and understand your self-harm.
Keeping a diary of what happened that made you want to self-harm, how you felt and what you were thinking before and after you self-harm can help you identify patterns to what causes you to self-harm and how, if at all, it might be helping you. From there you can find other, less harmful, ways to cope with what causes you to self-harm or things that can serve the same function.
As well as finding why you self-harm, coming up with reasons you want to stop or reduce the amount you self-harm can help. Keeping a list that you can add to and look back on when you want to self-harm can keep you motivated. You can also find lists online if you need ideas.
Breaking the Cycle
[Pt: Breaking the Cycle]
Self-harm can often become a cycle and something you do because you are used to it or because it has become addictive.
For some people, focusing to much on only stopping self-harm and not acknowledging why they self-harm can cause them to feel shame if they relapse, causing them to self-harm more, and creating a cycle. It's important to remember that self-harming is not a morally bad thing and that you are never a bad person for self-harming, even if other people try and make you promise not to. It takes time to find ways to not self-harm and relapsing when your trying to quit is common and normal.
When self-harm becomes the first thing you think of when your upset or bored, trying alternatives, distractions or delaying can help break that cycle. Here are some resources with ideas for alternatives, distractions or delaying:
Calm Harm, an app that helps you “ride the wave” of self-harm urges. Free in the UK and US, charges may apply elsewhere.
Delaying Self-harm
Helping yourself if you self-harm, both short- and long-term advice, there's also a version for people under 18
Distractions and Displacement
Distractions that can help…
Distraction Techniques and Alternative Coping Strategies
Caring For Injuries
[Pt: Caring For Injures]
Cutting/Scratching
[Pt: Cutting/Scratching]
Stop Bleeding; apply pressure with gauze or a clean non-fuzzy cloth (not toilet paper, cotton pads, tissues, kitchen paper, or anything else that may leave fibres in a cut). If the blood is spurting from the wound, apply pressure and immediately call for an ambulance you have hit an artery. If bleeding doesn't stop after ~10 minutes of applying pressure you need medical attention, head to the emergency room.
Asses damage;
You NEED an ambulance immediately if...
The injury is spurting bright red blood; you have hit an artery
You have symptoms of shock
The injury is internal, like if you've swallowed something
You lose sensation or movement in any area; this is a sign of nerve or tendon damage
You have a medical condition that means you need an ambulance
You are unsure if you need an ambulance
If you do not think you can take care of your injuries alone and cannot get yourself to A&E
You NEED to go to A&E/ER immediately if...
The bleeding does not stop after 10 minutes of applying even pressure
The injury is to a joint, palm, your face, or genitals
You can see muscle or bone. Muscle looks like meat
The tool you used to cut/scratch yourself was rusty
You have a medical condition that means you need emergency medical attention for your injury
You do not think you can take care of your injuries alone
You should get stitches (or if stitches aren't possible use wound closures, see below) if...
You can see fat (looks like yellow bubbles) or fascia (a thin white layer underneath fat)
The cut is 6 mm/0.25 in deep
The edges of the cut are jagged
Even if you do not fit any of the above criteria you can still go to A&E for self-harm, thoughts of self-harm or suicide. If you are unsure how serious an injury is, call your local A&E/ER's nurse line (if in the UK call 111 or use 111 online).
3. Cleaning; rinse out the wound with saline or clean water to remove any debris. Only use antiseptic if the tool you used to cut was dirty or the wound has become dirty.
4. Bandaging; for cuts that gape, wound closures like steri-strips, butterfly bandages, or zip-stitches can reduce risk of infection and speed up healing. You can make butterfly bandages with tape. Wound closures should be kept on until the cut has healed (~10-14 day usually) and covered with gauze. Change the gauze daily and check for signs of infection (see below). Keep the wound closures dry.
For cuts that do not gape or if you do not have any wound closures, put petroleum jelly/Vaseline on the cut(s) and cover with plasters/band-aids or gauze. If you are having problems with non-stick gauze sticking to cuts, I suggest using tefla. You can make tefla. If you have no gauze or plasters, clean, non-fuzzy cloth can work as a bandage. Change dressing daily or if it gets wet/dirty and check for signs of infection (see below) until the cut(s) are fully healed.
Burning (Thermal)
[Pt: Burning (Thermal)]
Remove clothing/jewellery; remove any clothing or jewellery from around the burn, if its stuck don't force it.
Stop burning; remove the source of heat and rinse with cool water for ~20 minutes, do not use ice or cold water
Assess damage; if the burn is larger then your hand you should seek immediate medical attention
You NEED an ambulance immediately if...
You have symptoms of shock
You lose sensation or movement in any area; this is a sign of nerve or tendon damage
No pain, this is a sign of nerve damage or a third degree burn
You have a medical condition that means you need an ambulance
You are unsure if you need an ambulance
If you do not think you can take care of your injuries alone and cannot get yourself to A&E
You NEED to go to A&E/ER immediately if...
The injury is to a joint, palm, your face, or genitals
The burn is white, black, or dark red and dry, this is a third degree burn
You have a medical condition that means you need emergency medical attention for your injury
You do not think you can take care of your injuries alone
4. Bandaging; do not use gauze or plasters/band-aids on burns. Cover the burn(s) with a hydrocolloid bandage or other burns bandage. Clean Plastic wrap or tefla can be used as a bandage with petroleum jelly/Vaseline. Do not wrap plastic wrap around yourself, use tape instead. You can make tefla. Change the dressing daily or if it gets wet or dirty and check for signs of infection (see below). Keep the wound covered till fully healed.
Chemical Burning
[Pt: Chemical Burning]
Remove chemical; remove any clothes soaked in the chemical, rinse all areas that have come into contact with the chemical thoroughly with warm water for 30+ minutes. Do NOT attempt to neutralise the chemical.
Go to hospital immediately; chemical burns are hard to asses the severity of and often require surgical intervention. If you have symptoms of shock or the burns are wide spread call an ambulance. Absence of pain is not a good sign.
Bruising/Hitting
[Pt: Bruising/Hitting]
Assess damage; if you have hit your head, be aware of the symptoms of concussions. Hitting yourself can cause bruising, sprains, strains, tears as well as more serious injuries (see below).
You NEED an ambulance immediately if you have...
An open fracture (bone has broken through the skin) or head, back, rib, or collar bone fracture
A misshapen limb
Symptoms of internal bleeding
Any symptoms of shock
You suspect a fracture or broken bone and don't have someone to take you to hospital
Bleeding from your head that doesn't stop after 15 minutes
Bleeding or clear fluid leakage of fluid from ears or nose
Weakness or inability to move part of your body
Different sized pupils (the black part of your eye)
A seizure
Problems with walking, balance, or communicating
Difficulty staying awake or keeping your eyes open
Changes in vision or hearing
You NEED to go to A&E/ER immediately if you have...
A closed fracture (no bone visible), not to your face, head, back, ribs, or collar bone and the limb is not misshapen
Blood in your pee or poo or that you cough up
Bleeding that doesn't stop after 15 minutes of pressure
Bulging/swelling muscle
Severe muscle pain or severe pain when stretching
Muscle tightness
A body part that has gone grey/blueish/cold or has a faint or no pulse
Confusion/restlessness/agitation/memory issues
A severe headache
Vomiting
If you have a head injury, do not drive yourself to A&E, get someone else to drive you or call an ambulance.
2. Treating; for non-head injures...
Protect; if a join is injured, a brace can be used to protect it
Rest; rest the injured area to allow it to heal, avoid putting weight on the injury. This also means avoiding harming in the same area.
Ice; use a cold compress on the injured area for about 20 minutes every ~3 hours to reduce swelling.
Compression; use an elastic bandage to on any swelling, make sure you don't wrap to tightly and cut or circulation.
Elevate; elevate the injured area to promote blood flow.
Repeat for three days or until swelling and pain goes away. Over the counter pain medications like acetaminophen/Tylenol can help with pain and so can muscle soreness creams like Deep Heat and Icy Hot. Gentle stretching can help with mild muscle tightness
If pain worsens or doesn't get better seek medical attention.
Head injures can be treated similarly to injures to the rest of the body. Use a cold compress periodically, rest as much as you can, and take acetaminophen/Paracetamol/Tylenol or another over the counter pain killer if needed. Rest as much as you can and avoid anything that could worsen the injury like contact sports or more head banging for as long as you can.
Drugs and alcohol can worsen head injuries and slow healing, avoid them as best you can. Driving or using other machinery can be dangerous after a head injury.
If symptoms worsen or persist for 2 weeks seek medical attention.
Self-Poisoning/Overdosing and Swallowing Foreign Objects
[Pt: Self-Poisoning/Overdosing and Swallowing Foreign Objects]
Internal self-harm always needs to be treated by a medical professional, call an ambulance. Do not attempt to make yourself throw up.
Infection
[Pt: Infection]
Assess damage;
If you have symptoms of a sever infection seek immediate emergency medical attention...
Confusion or disorientation
Feeling faint, dizzy, or fainting
Irregular heartbeat and/or breathing
Cold, clammy, pale skin
Fever (body temperature of 38c (100.4 f) or higher)
A red line coming from the wound
Severe muscle pain
Painful muscle spasms
This is not an exhaustive list of symptoms, more info here.
Symptoms of a mild infection include...
Spreading redness, heat, or swelling near the wound
Increased or new pain
Slow healing
Thick, smelly, or discoloured drainage leaking from wound. Normal drainage is watery, doesn't smell strong, and clear or yellowish
2. Treatment; if the infection is severe, seek intimidate emergency medical attention. If the infection is mild it is still good to see a doctor if you're able, but if you can't see a doctor...
Clean the the wound(s) with warm water and unscented anti-bacterial soap
Soak in warm water or apply a warm wet cloth for ten minutes
Apply antibiotic ointment to the infected wound(s)
Re-dress the wound(s). Do not reuse dressings.
Repeat this 3 times a day daily until infection subsides. If the infection worsens or does not go away seek medical attention.
Wound Care Myths
[Pt: Wound Care Myths]
Antiseptics (like hydrogen peroxide, alcohol, etc.); antiseptics damage cells and slow healing, they should not be used unless the tool used to self-harm was dirty or the wound is dirty. Many ointments advertised for wounds contain antiseptics, so it's important to check the ingredients before using them.
Antibiotic ointment (like Neosporin, Polysporin, etc.); use of antibiotics on wounds that are not infected can cause irritation, rashes, and contribute to antibiotic resistance. Antibiotics can also slow healing and there is no evidence that the use of antibiotics reduces the risk of infection. Do not use antibiotic ointment on wounds that are not infected. Many ointments advertised for wounds contain antibiotics, so it's important to check the ingredients before using them.
Letting wounds "breath"; wound dressings maintain an ideal healing environment, leaving them uncovered dries out the wound which slows healing and increases itchiness and pain. Uncovered wounds are also at an increased risk of infection
Butter/oil on burns; oils can trap heat on a burn that isn't cooled and bacteria in the oil can cause an infection. There is also no evidence it helps with healing.
Ice/cold water on burns; ice or cold water do more damage to burnt skin, use cool water
No pain is a good thing; no pain after an injury is a sign of nerve damage and is not a good thing. If you lose sensation in an area seek immediate emergency medical attention
Scabs are a good thing; scabs form when a wound is dry and tissues dies. Wounds that are left to dry out heal slower then wounds that are kept bandaged and moist.
Image credits (in order of appearance):
This Photo by Unknown Author is licensed under CC BY 3.0.
TE-Nervous system diagram by theEmirr is licensed under CC BY 3.0.
Disclaimers: This blog does not endorse self-harm, eating disorders, or other behaviours that can be harmful to someone's mental or physical health. Recovery, mental health treatment, and cessation of self-harm is also supported and advocated for (when it is right for the individual) on this blog. Harm minimisation has been recommended by the National Institute of Health and Care Excellence as a technique for people who self-harm.
This blog's generalised information is a limited summary of diagnosis, treatment, and/or medication information. It does NOT include all information about conditions, treatments, medications, side effects, or risks that may apply to a specific patient. It is not intended to be medical or mental health advice or a substitute for the medical or mental health advice, diagnosis, or treatment of a health care provider. Patients must speak with a health care provider for complete information about their health, medical questions, and treatment options. This information does not endorse any treatments or medications as safe, effective, or approved for treating a specific patient.
Thinking about sitting between my brothers at a restaurant as they play with me under the table while around their friends. They know that their sister is a hypersexual girl. They always see me squirm and squeeze my thighs together. They have seen how I soak through my panties and shorts at times.
They can't help themselves one day and while out with their friends one of my brothers places his hand on my thigh. Leaves it there for a while just playing with the fat on it. They know my cues, the squirming, squeezing of the thighs, the shaky voice, and he sees me deep into thought. His touch is not making anything better as he spreads me a little more. I glance at him as he casually keeps talking with his friends.
He runs his fingers over my already wet panties. I bite my lip trying not to whine as he pulls them to the side. I look around shyly and grab his wrist but it's nothing. He slowly rubs my clit and keeps talking until he's sinking his fingers into me. I gasp softly but play it off with a shy smile and giggle. Their friends are still not noticing I'm getting fingered by my brother.
My other brother next to me suddenly notices but doesn't say anything. He just smirks and grabs my thigh, placing it over his, and casually spreading me even more. The place is loud so no one can hear how wet my cunt sounds. My brothers make me order my own food as I stutter and squeak softly. His fingers curving just right and my face is flushing. Everyone thinks it's so cute and that I'm just shy.
Then I feel another hand on my cunt and tense up. I wasn't going to last as my other brother starts to rub my clit. I cover my face with my hand casually as my other brother guides my other thigh over his too. Thank goodness for the way this table is set up no one can see me spread open getting my cunt rubbed and fingered. I try to keep casual as I smile and talk but my face is so flushed. My breathing is getting harshed, it's getting hard to keep my voice controlled, and I'm starting to squirm even more.
I glance at my brothers and try to close my legs but they don't let me. I wasn't going to cum so casually from this, this was a big build up. Luck being on my side suddenly they start singing happy birthday to someone. Everyones attention turns to that side of the restaurant and my eyes flutter back as I let out a small squeal. Cumming all over their fingers and even onto the floor. No one can hear how I cum thanks to the loud singing. I'm panting and shaking as they slow down their advances with smirks.
I try to regain myself as everyone goes back to their casual things. They bring over the food causing my brothers to pull away. I watch as they casually suck off their fingers. I blush when their friends think they just tried whatever they ordered and they respond about how amazing it taste. Halfway during our meal they'll reposition me, this time switching places. Having to eat and try not to choke as they play with my cunt all over again. This time being more sensitive so it's harder to hide my reactions.
Not having an interruption this time to be able to hide the way I cum on my brother's fingers again. Having to smile and act like I'm okay when they are already trying to get a third one out of me. Overthinking because no way their friends can be that stupid, right? Maybe they are so when we leave one of them questions the wetness on the floor. Having to say I spilled some water when I didn't drink water. Or they are all purposely stalling, talking for hours, letting/encouraging their friends to finger their sister and recording my spread legs under the table.
How does one $h when they live with their partner who is home like all the time??? 😭 im so close to taking things out of the house with me to relapse, I just need a private space to fucking lose it
