Romantasy leads shouldn't be allowed to be leaders of nations anymore. They're always making horrible decisions and usually it's because they're driven by love and passion or the author is too blinded by sexy romantic times and so we're supposed to think they're good leaders. They're actually not, their people are absolutely worse off with them in charge, and they need to be overthrown. It ruins the immersion into a fantasy world if I have to ignore the fact that the fictional nations are suffering simply because the rulers are spending more time having throne sex than actually leading their people.
EXACTLY THE PROBLEM
Romantasy writers and readers want their leads to be super powerful and so they make them monarchs. And writers make a show of how their characters are Good Leaders who love their people and want what's best for them, so readers can see they're good people and therefore will be good romantic leads. This will also cut through whatever other facade the character puts on, so even if the (non-ruler) main character had previously hated the ruling character, MC will see they are actually a good person and this kickstarts the romantic arc.
But then comes the problem of wanting your leads to be so in love that nothing matters to them as much as their love interest. And this is meant to be the mark of a good love interest and a good romance that nothing else matters as much as their lover. And this happens often in romantasy, where even with an epic war on the horizon the two leads are more wrapped up in each other.
And these two things contradict each other! Because unfortunately a good ruler will have to put their personal needs and wants aside in order to be the kind of person their people need! This would be a really good conflict for a story where the ruling character cannot act on their own desires and fall in love so easily, for the sake of their people!
But romantasy authors do not want that kind of conflict. They want an all-consuming love where nothing else matters quite as much as the romance between their two leads. They want characters who will pledge their entire lives to their love interest with zero concern for anything else. Even if that "anything else" includes the nation we're supposed to believe they care about.
