Give em Purgatory

historian/archaeologist/baby hittitologist. artist (sometimes). -of questionable corporeality -blacklisted by the epic fandom as a hater -gamer (I only play Lotro)

[thehelplessmortals]

Welcome to the blog.

Thane or Tal, you’ll see both. Any prons, but usually they🦐

Asks are open (no anon tho. Subject to change)

Mildly 🔞 here and there.

I’m a historian/archaeologist who really really likes writing very serious, intense fanfiction and drawing silly drawings.

Art Instagram (@hapless_mortal)

Ao3 (i have posted twice)

I have a bluesky and i want to post on it but i dont like bluesky. Idk that's on you if you like bluesky you can find it. Kind of want to post my nsfw there but I’m a coward.

Main themes are Lord of the Rings, line of Suppiluliuma I, house of Atreus, general ancient history and mythology, my original characters from various things, various other medieval and or Welsh things when I’m in a King Arthur mood, whining about academics and nerve pain, etc.

My fursona is a post-apocalyptic hyena named Cage Match, I’m not a furry tho.

Quick tags are in the tags :)

Side blog (Lotro archive mostly)

Reincarnations of Homer DNI. People who think they are superior to established canon also DNI, I do bite.

Also racists, Eurocentrists, and otherwise bigoted individuals DNI either. Again, I bite.

[peskyfirefly]

ur girlfriend/boyfriend should NOT be ur first priority... ur first priority should ALWAYS be me, ur tumblr mutual

[salmon-slam]

i know i'm 19 years late to the game but lotro is kinda slapping

[razzmothazz]

still caring about internet friends you lost touch with years ago is so embarrassing. yeah i had a deam we met up irl recently. the last time we spoke was maybe 7-8 years ago. i still wear the laces we randomly decided was a sign of our friendship. i dont know what any of your socials are or if youre even active on any. sometimes i see someones art resemble yours and i wonder for hours. do you still go by that name you chose? whenever i see it i wonder if its you. we couldve passed each other in this vastness a thousand times and not have a clue.

[razzmothazz]

we were lonely kids having fun together. do you remember?

[kebriones]

A young princess of Thebes, doesn't know she's pregnant yet. She's incredibly optimistic and happy about life. She likes spending time outdoors (much to everyone's chagrin) and dreams of finding the courage to ask Zeus to just take her away from her miserable family and let her live with nymphs on some island far away. (Dionysus looks A LOT like his mom.)

[hydrachea]

> turns on my computer

> disables a new AI feature that was turned on by default

> opens my email

> disables a new AI feature that was turned on by default

> launches a software

> disables a new AI fea

[misericordiia]

gen z deadbeat father who left to get oat milk and a vape

[thehelplessmortals]

my original story x pacific rim au?

It’s more likely than you think

[thehelplessmortals]

Ok so get this

it’s an extra au au where they didn’t seal the breach but they’ve gone full throttle into the hive mind research and in their desperation got dna from one of the category fucking idk, 6 bastards (au dragon god Madness) and did some gross Kaiju hybridising science to make people who could have hive mind access of sorts (the hosts of Madness au) SO then anyway, trying to weaponise them as Jaeger pilots with that dna signature to get in and out of the breach and hopefully close it. BUT problem, they aren’t drift compatible with normal humans usually. The first test subjects were totally useless other than being liabilities, but the second gen were way more promising and way more human.

Au Fèn still has so many issues drifting until au Deryn, they develop a super strong bond and dream team whatever whatever and then Deryn dies of course and Fèn can’t drift with anyone else for years until another second gen hybrid (au Taran) comes along having failed completely to be compatible with anyone else. There’s some sciencey reason why two hybrid pilots might be problematic but eventually they decide to risk it. Haven’t thought through the details but basic idea is that this goes very right until it goes very wrong and results in Fèn loosing his mind and keeling over and Taran having to tear himself out of the bridge with both broken Fèn and the hivemind and being “damaged beyond repair” and terrified to try drifting again.

Last ditch efforts later, another attempt at closing the breach, and they need their hybrids. Taran had become close to a third gen hybrid (au Ruinath) but command won’t risk another hybrid duo, so they keep Ruinath with his og copilot (probably his adoptive brother au Danath or something) and Taran has to go through finding another, which sucks until he encounters au Adelynde, and with the baggage from the last situation it’s a rough start but they become dream team again. So them, Ruinath and Danath, and probably another jaegar (maybe au Arnórr and his dad Agnarr) go and enter the breach and actually take on the source of the hive mind (au Ariath) and defeat it with cannons and bombs. And then dramatically race to escape before the rift collapses. Anyway yeah this is my perfect au actually

And I want their jaegers to be based on first gen Lego hero factory because that would be sick. Fèn’s would be based on Breeze, Taran and Adelynde’s on Bulk, and Arnórr and Agnarr’s on Stormer.

[heavensenthousepet]

you learn something new everyday. unless you're a historian. then you learn something old

[comikbook]

“how do you get people online to care about your ocs” you have to be soooooooo annoying like really annoying

[moethh]

am i the only one who hates the corporatization of Catholicism right now

[moethh]

i hate the concept of “Catholic celebrities” i hate “Catholic products” (innocuous nonreligious things that have a saint quote on them or whatever) i hate like 90% of Catholic podcasts i hate Catholic AI i hate the fact that my religion is turning into something marketable i hate this actually

[tanoraqui]

another great thing about Eowyn/Faramir is that Faramir is a) Gondorin aristocracy and b) kind of a nerd, AND c) he grew up in a high-walled city under constant threat of an adjacent Enemy, which means he has definitely read at least one, more likely multiple epic poems about the Fall of Gondolin; which means when he calls Eowyn “White Lady of Rohan”, he is 100% consciously referencing Aredhel Ar-Feiniel, White Lady of the Noldor, huntress, traveller, and rebel, whose life was (too often) defined by seeking freedom and whom history wishes had not died in defense of someone she loved.

[molabuddy]

3 hours of sleep = i hate people who laugh

0 ours of sleep = waouw 🌼🌼🌼🌼🐎

[molabuddy]

we all need to take better care of our selfs or we might Pass away

[boatgrave-deactivated20250901]

[mysteryteacup]

*Scrolls past*

*reluctant sigh*

*scrolls back up*

*rebogs*

[thehelplessmortals]

my original story x pacific rim au?

It’s more likely than you think

[thehelplessmortals]

Ok so get this

it’s an extra au au where they didn’t seal the breach but they’ve gone full throttle into the hive mind research and in their desperation got dna from one of the category fucking idk, 6 bastards (au dragon god Madness) and did some gross Kaiju hybridising science to make people who could have hive mind access of sorts (the hosts of Madness au) SO then anyway, trying to weaponise them as Jaeger pilots with that dna signature to get in and out of the breach and hopefully close it. BUT problem, they aren’t drift compatible with normal humans usually. The first test subjects were totally useless other than being liabilities, but the second gen were way more promising and way more human.

Au Fèn still has so many issues drifting until au Deryn, they develop a super strong bond and dream team whatever whatever and then Deryn dies of course and Fèn can’t drift with anyone else for years until another second gen hybrid (au Taran) comes along having failed completely to be compatible with anyone else. There’s some sciencey reason why two hybrid pilots might be problematic but eventually they decide to risk it. Haven’t thought through the details but basic idea is that this goes very right until it goes very wrong and results in Fèn loosing his mind and keeling over and Taran having to tear himself out of the bridge with both broken Fèn and the hivemind and being “damaged beyond repair” and terrified to try drifting again.

Last ditch efforts later, another attempt at closing the breach, and they need their hybrids. Taran had become close to a third gen hybrid (au Ruinath) but command won’t risk another hybrid duo, so they keep Ruinath with his og copilot (probably his adoptive brother au Danath or something) and Taran has to go through finding another, which sucks until he encounters au Adelynde, and with the baggage from the last situation it’s a rough start but they become dream team again. So them, Ruinath and Danath, and probably another jaegar (maybe au Arnórr and his dad Agnarr) go and enter the breach and actually take on the source of the hive mind (au Ariath) and defeat it with cannons and bombs. And then dramatically race to escape before the rift collapses. Anyway yeah this is my perfect au actually

And I want their jaegers to be based on first gen Lego hero factory because that would be sick. Fèn’s would be based on Breeze, Taran and Adelynde’s on Bulk, and Arnórr and Agnarr’s on Stormer.

[unfortunatesal]

personality test came back negative

[thehelplessmortals]

my original story x pacific rim au?

It’s more likely than you think