I think something people fundamentally misunderstand about John Egbert and Homestuck when they try to make Dad Egbert a Shitty Parent, Actually (often by framing him as overbearing, overprotective, and/or controlling) is that they are actually undercutting the tragedy of John's story.
All of the beta kids and their guardians are there to represent different types of parent/child relationship and thus to tell different tragedies. These are not 1:1, but I am going to use the four parenting styles here for simplicity's sake.
Bro Strider is the authoritarian. He maintains crushing expectations of Dave (to be cool, to be ironic, to be a hero) and those expectations are reinforced with harsh consequences—physical violence, starvation, constant surveillance. There's no trust, compassion, or mutual respect, and Dave's tragedy is that in many ways the game was an escape.
Grandpa Harley is the neglectful parent. Of course, he's dead, so he didn't exactly have much of a choice in the matter, but the result is the same: Jade has to navigate through life alone, and without a guardian to care for her, she projects this care onto a literal corpse just to feel like there's somebody there. Jade's tragedy is entering the game, meeting people who care about her, and being forced to genuinely confront for the first time how hard things were for her. (And, for bonus points, she is forced to learn through Bec Noir how having someone or something that loves you can hurt just as much.)
Mom Lalonde is the indulgent parent. Rose gets everything she wants during her childhood, and she rejects this notion as passive aggression because of her disapproval of her mother's lifestyle. (This is also why it drives me insane that people try to frame Rose's mom as neglectful, but that's a rant for another day.) Rose's tragedy is realizing that she rejected the love of a person who was doing everything she could to connect with her and being forced to reconcile that people can still hurt us even when they love us and are earnestly trying their best.
But Dad Egbert is the authoritative parent. He loves and supports his son, he gives him opportunities to grow and do things on his own, he tries to connect with his interests—and he dies while he's trying to find and protect his son like some sort of dark retelling of Finding Nemo. At every turn, Dad Egbert does what is best for his son, and we consistently see John overcome challenges directly because of that support.
And John acknowledges this! Sure, he has some complaints about his Dad at the beginning of the comic, but what normal 13-year-old has never gotten annoyed with their guardian? It is developmentally normal and not an indicator of a parent doing a bad job. Once he gets into the game, he almost immediately asks where his Dad went and says he hopes he's okay (which is not a question any of the other kids ask about their guardians upon entry), and his main (personal) quest basically the entire time they're in the Medium is to find his Dad until he and Rose find their parents dead. He consistently talks for the rest of the comic about how much he loves and misses his dad, and John and Dad Crocker's hug is one of the most important and touching moments of Act 7 because it represents a reunion John will never get to have with his own father.
John's tragedy is that he is the only one of his friends who has a normal, loving, caring, supportive parent, and that is ripped away from him right when he needs it most. John's tragedy is that, for the first time in his life, he is without any support from his father, and he has to figure everything out. John's tragedy is that he is just a normal kid who misses his dad, and now he has to save the world.
And y'all want to throw that away over what? Birthday cake?
