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Show & Tell
Xuebing Du
occasionally subtle
Fai_Ryy
Product Placement
Misplaced Lens Cap
Cosmic Funnies
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Andulka
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he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
Today's Document
KIROKAZE
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Noah Kahan
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Claire Keane
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@thelittlestaarons
“Does anybody want their future told? Fortune told? Either way, I’m psychic tonight.” She pointed to the sign at the booth proclaiming her a fortune teller. “I do cards, ‘n also palms. Clean ones, specially. Specifically. They’re not real but--whoops, i wasn’ supposed to tell you that. Shh, it’s all real.”
“I don’t know what the hell is happening here, but hey, I still look good so I’m just going to roll with it. Can I get you a drink? Like I’d rather you say no, but I have to do something until this shit wears off.”
“Ooh sure, do you have...fruit punch? I looove fruit punch. I usually wouldn’t drink it because punch is for kids, but it’s like, Halloween, so. Totally okay. Right? Just say yes. Also...Are you new here? You look familiar, but, like, not?”
“Am I broken or something?” Kat stared at her hands, twisting them around and waiting to see if they’d turn back into tiny paws. “Whatever this is, I’m suing as soon as I figure it out. This stuff hurts, you know.”
“Oh my god! Do you have...really fuzzy arms? Which, um, if you’ve like, not shaved in a while, then ‘m not judging. But. That seems like a little much. Oh! Is this a costume? It’s kinda cute, I’ll admit. But shhh, i’ve got a reputashion. [She frowns and tries to say the word without slurring the S sound so much]. Repu--Reputation to keep.
This wasn’t the worst thing that had happened to him, by far, but even that was telling enough. All Phil wanted to do was take a nap and avoid large crowds, but in this state that was unlikely. “I’m so tired. What am I even supposed to eat with this face? Kale? I’d rather die.”
“Um, what do you usually eat with your face? Cause I’ve got some candy, and uh...I saw some Carmel apples and stuff over there.” She waved vaguely in the direction of the food. “But if you want leafy stuff there’s, like, grass that way.” She burst out giggling, despite it not being that funny.
charlalbr:
charla had absolutely no idea what tatiana was saying but she knew tatiana was definitely drunk. luckily, charla’s watched plenty of television and new the cure to alcohol. “ma’am, are you okay? do you need some water?”
“Am I okay? You’re so sweet. Like...really nice, that’s nice. I’m very okay, don’t worry. But maybe water would be really nice. Or some M&M’s. Do you have any M&M’s?” Charla looked...different, but Tatiana couldn’t put her finger on what it was, exactly. Her vision was, after all, a little fuzzy.
charla was home but she knew something was off about the camp she was currently in. everything looked nicer. the technology around camp wasn’t buggy and the training grounds were definitely upgraded. there was only one explanation that made sense to her. “i’ve come to the conclusion that a magical spirit has taken me to the future.”
“Nooooo. We’re done with magic for a while, ‘kay? ‘Kay. We could just have a nice fun time, you know? Like...In life. Right?” Tatiana nodded seriously. “Plus the future would be boring, with robots and stuff. No thanks for me. Enjoy the present. We’ve got a haunted house.”
magic anon: you are constantly in an intoxicated state of mind (until 11/16)
“I’m not drunk, you’re drunk,” Tatiana said with a giggle. Which. Huh. Since when did she giggle? “I haven’ had a drink in….Um…longer than right now.” That didn’t even make any sense, which made her giggle more. Maybe she was a happy drunk. How weird. “If you don’t stop lookin’ at me like that, I’m gonna freeze your butt off.” But the threat was hard to take seriously with her cheeks bright pink and her hair crazy.
jacobtrashprince :
“Then I’ve suffered enough for a lifetime over. Probably two. What’s a little more? Yes, I see it now. How dare I think of growing up nice and tall while my sweet, dear cousin can’t even reach a counter top properly. May the gods smite me down for my thoughtlessness.”
“What can I say? I’m a multitasker. Well, I suppose I can’t fault your motivations, even if the actions still seem utterly perplexing. You know I’m an adult, right? And I have more work experience than you and Charlotte combined. Just because I may be… distracted from my regular activity doesn’t mean you can just lump me in with the rest of you. That’s just disrespectful.”
“How do you not have an ulcer already. Or do you, and I just don’t know about it? Right, you were clearly being inconsiderate. You think I can’t reach a counter top? You are such a jerk. I hope the gods do smite you.”
“So talented. An impressive set of skills, really. Okay, what don’t you get? I’m bettering myself. It’s for the good of mankind. Otherwise I might take over the world and make every day winter or something. Okay, all in all, ice powers aren’t really that scary. I don’t have a lot to work with. Yeah, it had crossed my mind that you might fall into that category. That hardly counts, though. I’m talking about working to become a better person, Jacob. Not just working. That’s still dumb. Oh right, I forgot how awful it would be for you to find yourself included with the likes of us. Your loving family.”
lucybarns :
“Love ya, too. My friendship is the greatest gift, I know.”
“Inedible according to who, huh? I’m stronger than this questionable coffee… attempt. I’m gonna kick your coffee thing’s ass.” She tries to toss some sludge down her throat like a thick, toxic shot and sort of almost doesn’t immediately gag. “Oh– Oh my gods. That’s barely food. What did you do to it?— … Do you think we can get Chiron to eat it?”
“Mhhm, that’s what I meant. Could I get a gift receipt?”
“See, I knew that would get you! You’re so predictable. Uh huh, just drink it, tough guy.” She grimaces as she watches Lucy drink--attempt to drink--the coffee sludge. It looks so bad. “Barely food--I put it in the pot and dumped some water in. I don’t know, I just did what I see everybody else doing. I love how that’s your first thought. Probably, but we’d have to tell him it was something else. Does caviar sound believable?”
daphnescout :
Tatiana, do you ever have fun? You can play the kazoo or something. Besides, it’s not about actually contributing anything. Just go and yell into the microphone and get your feelings out. Almost all artists that were considered iconic and legends were shitty people, anyway. As long as you aren’t, who cares and go be the visual.
I’ve had fun. It wasn’t my favorite. The kazoo? Gods, okay. Fine. Better than the triangle, or something. Plus, they are kind of funny. I don’t think I understand the music industry. Like, at all. You sound kinda like my uncle. Big karaoke lover. Very proud of it. That doesn’t encourage me to join, but I’m a shitty person already, so. Why not, right? I’m pretty good a crowd control, too. Nothing breaks up a rowdy group of people like a sudden drop in temperature [wiggles her frosty fingers proudly].
lillianfairly :
“A camp prank sounds fun in concept, but they usually go hand in hand with magical craziness, don’t they? What’s next, some angry pixie turns us all into toddlers for a week?”
“Damn, just as I was getting a little hyped for a camp prank, you bring out the practicality of it all. Okay, but. Hear me out. Nobody had problems when they were a toddler. I mean, maybe simple stuff, like needing a new diaper, or wanting food, but things were easier. Maybe it wouldn’t be too bad,”
zackarysong :
Well, plenty of stuff can give you bad skin so tell them to get over it and enjoy some chocolate. Hey, it’s not lame. It’s cute. I’m bad a jokes, puns, all that stuff with play on words. I never realize the perfect opportunities until hours later.
That’s what I’ve been saying! But nobody listens to me. I’m half convinced that all of the moisturizers and fancy creams they use are what gives them bad skin, cause I’ve never touched the stuff, and my face is fine. Haha, okay, cool. I mean, great. I think you’re good at puns and stuff. I mean, you’re pretty funny.
“hey, where’s a good place to get some tea? the high caffeine amounts i’ve been drinking lately isn’t doing me any favors, and i don’t trust that coffee place.”
“You know that tea has caffeine in it too, right? So you probably aren’t changing anything by drinking it. Try juice instead. Or....water. Nature’s juice.”
lucybarns :
“That sounds good enough for me.”
“That sounds like a challenge. Oh, my sweet, sweet, Tater Tat. The more you veer toward ‘pretty much a dare’, you know I’m going to have to at least try to eat this. Drink this? We’ll have to see. Pass it here.”
“I love how easy you guys are to convince of stuff.”
“Oh--um, yep. Definitely a challenge, one you should accept immediately.” She laughs. “Well, consider it a dare, then. I dare you to try my inedible coffee sludge. Uh...that’s dependent, to be honest. It’s kinda thick, you might need spoon or something. Here you go.”
Who wants to start a band? I’ll be the stereotypical girl that’s cute and can only hit a tambourine.
I can’t even hit a tambourine, so maybe I should sit this one out. Thanks though. Enjoy....not contributing anything to musical success. The recording industry is dead, and all that. Good luck.
That sounded sarcastic, but I meant it. That’s just sort of my default.
Maybe I should go to school. College always sounded like a fun way to give myself anxiety and unnecessary stress. I mean, I haven’t even gotten counselor so it’s not like I’m busy. I have no idea where my family is so that’s not holding my back either. I totally need to get out more. My best friend is gone and Vanessa barely has time for me anymore because she’s an actual semi-responsible adult. Also, it’s late and I’m talking to something I’m not even close to about my possible mid-life crisis. It’s a sign.
Um, you don’t sound so good. Are you sure you should go to college? It’s seriously an unnecessary waste of time, and if you’re already spiraling...maybe you should look for other options. Just a thought. Look, if it makes you feel better, people I’m not even close to talk to me about mid-life crisis all the time. A sign that you need to take a chill pill and stop overthinking, maybe.
jacobtrashprince :
“Forgive me if I’m finding it hard to find comfort in that. You say that like it’s my fault. You’re small. Are you sure you can even get me in the wheelbarrow?”
“It’s not disapproval. It’s genuine, pure shock and confusion, all the way from the bottom of my heart. I mean, sure, you could, hypothetically, learn to do any of that. But why would you want to— Did you say catching up? What in the world are you catching up to?”
“Your choice. I’ve always heard worrying makes you suffer twice. It is your fault. You must have eaten your vegetables and drank your milk when you were told, and that’s why you’re...you. I didn’t, and that’s clearly why I’m small. I can try.”
“It sounds like disapproval mixed with pure shock and confusion. Can’t a girl just try to spice up her life by doing something interesting? I’m catching up to all these boring adults who have jobs and work experience and stuff. I’m trying to better myself as a person, Jay. Clearly not something you’re familiar with, but you understand the concept, right?”
