Head In The Stars

"Vox lines are open and weapons are free. stand by for support." Welcome to a home for Jacta Novasky, freelance pilot and amateur duelist.

[unseelieprincess]

There will NEVER be any Destiny lore funnier than the time two Knights in the Sea of Screams got into a philosophy/politics argument, neither could beat the other, and they’d been fighting for like a day and were super tired, so they just jumped off a cliff and let the ascendant realm’s currents take them Wherever, and their bullshit distracted them from their actual duties so much, a champion of Crota lost a fight because one of those idiots hadn’t delivered tithe, and Crota lost a temple because of that, to Xivu Arath, and then THAT started a chain reaction of him losing several MORE tributary temples, which caused him to retreat to his Throne, which left him groggy and out of it and unprepared for battle, leading to Crota DYING, which lead TO ORYX DYING-

And in short The Young Wolf only survived their confrontation with Crota and became the godslaying hero they are today, vanquishing a billion year old god-king devil…

Because two bonehead Hive Knights HAD to waste time re-enacting something out of Princess Bride.

This is why they’re my favorite alien race in Destiny.

[flowers-of-io]

This is the lore, if you’re curious. And yes, this is essentially what happens there.

[the-quasar-hero]

It’s SO obvious that some of y’all are incredibly mad that my wizard hat is bigger and supremely balanced.

[schakira]

okay… i can still see the folds on your wizard robe… iron it.

[the-quasar-hero]

Now I know you ain’t talking with ya dusty ass grimoire. That bad boy is held together with scotch tape, spit, and faith. Helpful hint: you want the spines of your enemies to break, not your magical tomes.

[schakira]

no cause it’s really cute hearing that from you when last i checked your grimoire isn’t being passed down from generation to generation. i know you got it from walmart with your dollar store lookin ass staff. you can keep your hint.

[the-quasar-hero]

I just think it’s funny you think anything that isn’t dusted and busted like your grimoire is somehow less authentic, when the reality is you a broke ass wizard who can’t get your coin up! You gotta use hand-me-downs cuz no king wants to make use of your services! Maybe you should dress like this isn’t the third century and ppl would visit your sad lil’ wizard tower. Your grimoire so old I bet that shit got spells to deal with dinosaurs. I got a spell in mine to make wifi anywhere. Oh, and I know you ain’t talking about staffs when you carry around that plywood looking ass shit. You tryna conjure forth a Home Depot employee?

[schakira]

you scroll-stuffing spell stealing nasty little SLUT

[the-quasar-hero]

Nuh-uh, bitch, try again.

[unhipwitch]

[tinadayton]

I would just like to say fuck you to everyone who made me feel inadequate growing up and ruining my self esteem for years. You all suck and I’m glad I don’t talk to any of you any more. 

[mrdyketator]

I’m so glad this has more than a million notes. Fuck people who make you feel worthless

[agenuineshit]

1920 team fortress 2 characters

pd: the author of this 

http://ramida-r.deviantart.com/

and her tumblr:

http://ramida-r.tumblr.com/

[memewhore]

[bananahomo]

I reblogged this last month, tagged it, and said “might as well see if it works.” I used this video as a reference to find all the forms that i needed (which is A LOT, especially if you’re a dependent) and sent them through the mail, not really allowing myself to hope.

dude.

$2,714 of medical debt from my top surgery - gone. im shaking this was such a weight on me for 2 years and it fucking worked. what the fuck.

[kineticpenguin]

My fellow Americans, it is clear that we have once again been failed by our current politicians. They lack the leadership and drive to deliver the help millions of us so desperately need, and the backbone to effectively fight the pandemic or tackle climate change. It is clear that I must run in 2024. Here is my platform.

Universal health care

Education funding will no longer be dependent on local property values

Completely revamping the tax system so that instead of filling out paperwork to see if you’ve been paying too much or if you owe money, only the correct amount is automatically taken from pay. So on one hand, no more refunds barring clerical error. On the other, you get more of your money when you are paid and you don’t have to throw money at Turbotax or H&R Block, or figure out filing on your own.

UBI of $2,000/month adjusted yearly for inflation and local cost of living.

Empty housing units will be taxed.

I will have Elon Musk deported. To Mars, for irony’s sake.

End our dependency on fossil fuels for energy production. If it’s non-nuclear or non-renewable, it’s out. We will have a massive power plant replacement program.

Fix and update our infrastructure to be more useful, and so we don’t all die on our daily commute because the 80-year-old bridge collapsed.

FAST TRAINS EVERYWHERE

However, you can’t be a successful American president without also being some kind of bastard. To that end, I will enact the following policies:

The state of Idaho will be designated as a bombing and artillery range. Its residents will not have to move out because they will all be designated enemy combatants. They know what they did.

We can, should, must, and will mess with Texas.

To cut costs, some of the new nuke plants will use RBMK reactors.

All A-10s will be withdrawn from service except to provide 24/7 cover for me, personally. I will have a Raytheon laser eye implant that lets me designate anyone I look at and don’t like for an immediate 30mm burst.

[thenorthlord3]

So your platform is basically money printer go brrrrr

[kineticpenguin]

If it’s good enough for the fine folks at Lockheed Martin, it’s good enough for you, citizen!

[someemochick]

[cassiefisherdrake]

me, after having BT-7274 for 5 minutes:

[confusionofconfusions-deactivat]

[afloweroutofstone]

Give Davy Jones his Colt Special back

[normal-horoscopes]

Fucked up that the Toronto PD are disarming bog mummies

[bulk-2056]

I feel like that gun is gonna just dismantle itself the moment the trigger is pulled

[silver-tongues-blog]

We should be fine as long as we do not reblog bread.

[xikar]

Question.

I’ve rebogged bread.

[doublereversequadrupleagent-blo]

What?

[arthurkingsmen-archive-deactiva]

I have done nothing but reblog bread for the past three days.

[blurry-yeensman]

Where, where have you been sending it?!

[infamouslydorky]

[impiusangelus]

I love how there are more reblogs than likes

[silver-tongues-blog]

This post. This fucking post. I cannot believe after nearly 7 years its still going around. Let alone ON MY OWN DASH! A kid born on the day i posted this would be entering 2nd grade right now.

[nelc]

Tactical snacks

[the-spoopy-ghost-of-raejin99]

Snactical, if you will

[transmechanicus]

*Launches a baguette like a Stinger missile*

[ask-mortarion-the-death-lord]

Horus Heresy AU where perturabo and mortarion team up, perform rad mad science together, and shove a hundred billion terminiator suits down the emperors throat.

[ask-mortarion-the-death-lord]

honestly, that could indeed work. Pert and Mort team up as co arch traitors predicated on a shared sense of resentment and bitterness towards basically everyone that blossoms into a surprisingly deep and touching friendship/bromance. 

Magnus is the reluctant third wheel dragged along out of circumstance desperately trying to keep everything together backstage.

Konrad tags along to nag at mortarion about “the visions!” and how his future sights basically crapped out, everything’s changed and nothing makes sense anymore.

Angron gets most of his brain and spine replaced in a mad science binge with a mechanical monstrosity that would make the skaven blush but surprisingly works really well at calming him down and saving his life.

Fulgrims also tagging along but just to get pert and mort to build him the most spectacular sound stage of all time.

lorgar keeps chasing them in abyss class battleships intent on making prattling confused sermons on chaos through a loudspeaker to no avail, accompanied by a very grumpy horus luprecal who wants to be the arch traitor now very much please.

alpharius keeps replacing guillimans things with cheese statuettes of the emperor for some reason. Omegon replaces them with bread statuettes instead. No one knows why. Guilliman just wants to write tax codes god emperor damn it.

the lion and vulkan are looking for the holy grail. Neither interact with each other very often so its basically the most awkward road trip ever.

corvus corax is now bird man on the run from the law

rogal dorn has basically become dick dastardly and with lemen russ and jagahtai khans help have been trying to upstage/take out pert and mort through ridiculous scheme after ridiculous scheme much to dorns and russes frustration and the khans amusement.

ferrus manus has been confused for a necron overlord of a recently awakened tomb world, a role he takes to with surprising gusto.

sanguinius just wants to have a family reunion without everyone throwing steak knives at each others head.

The emperor is still busy trying to boot up the webway which in fact runs on windows xp, so he had no idea any of this is happening.

Malcador just wants a drink.

[derkow-derkow]

Will Morty and Perty try to bust out the Void Dragon, in part to increase their mad scientist rep and to spite the Emperor?

[ask-mortarion-the-death-lord]

Nah, ferrus manus busts it out and goes on a pokemon collection journey to catch all the void dragon shards. Its why hes being mistaken for a necron overlord, what with them being friends and all.

[prosperousduckscommuteviawaffle]

*Zavala staring with extreme focus at Crow*

Zavala: I don’t believe it. Is that…?

Osiris:…

Crow:…

Zavala: A hunter!

*Slamming his hand down on Crow’s shoulder*

Zavala: VANGUARD! Ikora! I got one!!

[ailment-remade-deactivated20210]

nikola tesla was like “you will live to see man made horrors beyond your comprehension” yeah dude and they’ll prolly be branded with your last name. how does that make you feel

[masseffectdoctor]

Probably not to great considering if Tesla had the opportunity he’d probably strangle Musk to death for his pigeons entertainment

[serialreblogger]

Petition to resurrect Tesla and sic him on Elon for sport

[kalelraejepsen-deactivated20231]

oh? you think the wellerman may soon come to bring you sugar and tea and rum?

that’s cute. i was told we’d cruise the seas for american gold and now i’m a broken man on a halifax peer, the last of barrett’s privateers so like ¯＼_(ツ)_/¯

[screebyy]

A Gift In Return – You cannot convince me this is not canon

[hotvampireadjacent]

Heads up for fgo friends the next event requires you’ve finished lb3 to participate

[hotvampireadjacent]

[kalichnikov]

it's impossible to be clear of sin if you play fgo