The agenda is crime

old millennial, refugee, & calzone thief

[thanksiloveyou]

2014 average url: tumblring-in-the-tardis

2026 average url: weemp

[olicrosse]

[cephalopodvictorious]

fixed it

[star-thief]

[seabeck]

Looming

[greengooseblr]

[netscapenavigator-official]

You should be starting a recipe book. I don't give a shit if you're only 20-years-old. The modern web is rotting away bit by bit before our very eyes. You have no idea when that indie mom blog is going down or when Pinterest will remove that recipe. Copy it down in a notebook, physically or digitally. Save it somewhere only you can remove it. Trust me, looking for a recipe only to find out it's been wiped off the internet is so fucking sad. I've learned my lesson one too many times.

[oneheadtoanother]

[themuppetagenda]

On one hand specifically targeting people who are older and more reactionary is funny and more likely to succeed. On the other hand go right now talk to your parents about not clicking links.

You got an email from microsoft saying your windows account was compromised "click here to chat with support" and other similar scams are getting very good at social engineering to target people. Even if it looks legit tell them to call or email the company directly, do not click the link.

Gen x was always told "don't go to a second location" as a message about staying safe in public. Clicking links in your email is going to a second [digital] location with a potential scammer. That explanation really clicks for a lot of older people I talk to and helps them understand what I mean. Do not click the link.

[themuppetagenda]

utterly baffling how the u.s. political party that allegedly represents small government and personal choice and ended up in a culture war on the side of big brother panopticon to legally enforced genders

mind your damn business I do not give a fuck what my neighbor is doing to their gender it literally has no effect on you

[ravioliet]

stupid doodle i made based on this post. guy who doesn’t know hes tied to the tracks and his best friend the trolley operator

[whyenn-reader]

ADHD advice from non-ADHD people: start blocking out your day and put things in your google calendar

ADHD advice from ADHD people: any time you're waiting for your food to microwave YOU HAVE TO WASH DISHES WASH AS MANY AS YOU CAN THIS IS A RACE AGAINST TIME THIS IS THE ONLY TIME THIS COULD HAPPEN

[themuppetagenda]

The only place I could plant my garden this year was in partial shade, and my tomatoes are not having it. They yearn for the sun, they must have it. I have never seen tomatoes get this tall. How dare they have to live in the shade for half the day! No. They must find the daylight. They outgrew the tomato cages immediately, and I have been using increasing tall sticks to stake them. I'm concerned that they're gonna take inspiration from their stakes and start evolving lignin. I will have tomato trees before august. Someone is going to send a terminator after me for making killer tomatoes.

I am standing in this picture. 5'10" tall (178 cm), yet I cannot even reach the top of the plant.

[shithowdy]

american blackbirds are icterids but european blackbirds are thrushes but american robins are thrushes but european robins are flycatchers and they are named robin because (checks notes) brits in the 1400s called them "robert" on account of they are just some familiar guy who shows up in your yard. hold on post canceled is that really why they are called that? what the fuck. they did this with jackdaws and magpies too? i can't even be annoyed. how human. "who's that? that's bob." fuck dude it sure is.

[catchymemes]

[viewfindercomics]

the rainbow connection or whatever 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩

[murielswedding]

absolutely fucking insane lyric choice

[caulitheflower]

So I looked this up because I didn't remember.

This is from Blank Space, which is a lot on its own.

But the lyrics literally go:

"So it's gonna be forever. Or it's gonna go down in flames. You can tell me when it's over. If the high was worth the pain."

WTF

Context matters, people.

[themuppetagenda]

Fireflies in june on a walk with Muppet.

[dogpuppy]

[kidzbopdeathgrips]

oh my god just saw two pirate ships get into a fender bender right outside my apartment

[kidzbopdeathgrips]

two dudes with hook hands and trifold hats are currently out there yelling about who had right of way

[gaycop]

peg legs?

[kidzbopdeathgrips]

no, they don't have peg legs. god, that's such an offensive stereotype. learn some shit about pirates instead of making yourself look ignorant on my post

[gaycop]

…eyepatches?

[kidzbopdeathgrips]

of course they had eyepatches what are you stupid