#extradirty
Cosimo Galluzzi
shark vs the universe
tannertan36
One Nice Bug Per Day
Product Placement
đ
untitled
noise dept.
blake kathryn
Cookie Run:Kingdom Official!
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
đ©” avery cochrane đ©”
Not today Justin
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
PR's Tumblrdome
Interview Vampire Daily
No title available
titsay
KIROKAZE
seen from Spain
seen from T1
seen from United States
seen from Ukraine
seen from Vietnam
seen from Russia
seen from TĂŒrkiye
seen from Sweden
seen from Brazil
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Bangladesh
seen from Germany
seen from Australia
seen from Bangladesh
seen from Singapore
seen from Iraq
seen from Australia
seen from Venezuela
seen from Germany
@grey-waala-shade
my knight you have to live you have to get up you have to put your hand over your wound and hold it there. you have to keep walking and walking and walking because you cannot lay down yet, itâs not time. wipe the blood off your breastplate and look up into the sun. lean on your sword if you need to. lift one foot after another. get up. get up. this would be a pitiful grave.
this would be a pitiful grave.
Thereâs a liquor store near my house that seems to be run exclusively by frat boys. They lovingly curate these bags, which I browsed today while âOops I Did It Againâ played through the store speakers. This is art to me, there is beauty everywhere for those with eyes to see it
The update everyone has been waiting forâŠ.
everytime i see this it makes me want to buy from them exclusively
That's not fair.
(If you want to see me vent I'm on tiktok, @cryingbard)
Expelled from Word, he is now trying to contact you through other programs...
Edit: Free Cross-Stitch pattern now available here!
MAGA boomers SHOCKED by 20y/o commie speaking fluent hog
Hog 201 for anyone interested in trying this:
Bodily autonomy (like abortion, anti draft, etc) -> âThe government shouldnât be able to force anything on my body I donât want.â
Anti surveillance -> âI donât trust big government/big tech (big brother if youâre feeling frisky) with the ability to spy on me and my family.â
Immigration -> âNext to all of us immigrated at some point, I donât see why the elites get to decide whoâs allowed to be where. Whatâs to stop them coming for me?â
Climate Change -> âBig oil shouldnât get to determine whether or not I get to go places. I donât want to be dependent on some big business to survive.â
State Violence -> âI donât want the goddamn secret police breathing down my neck! I trust my community a whole hell of a lot more to help me than I do the state!â
The vast majority of conservatives think of themselves as underdogs being repressed by the government/the elite, and they value personal freedom (specifically their personal freedom, they donât care about other people). The will almost always agree with leftist points if you can find a way to blame the problem on their vague enemies (useful, since rich people are the root of most problems), and tie it back to their ability to say fuck everyone else. NEVER appeal to science, theory, logic, or human goodness. Make it seem as if you are a paranoid lunatic who trusts no one. They love it.
#you need to tailor your arguments to people's existing values and priorities if you want to convince them #the flip side is that it's every bit as easy to tailor conservative arguments to convince a leftist audience #so don't get smug #you're not immune to this either <- prev extremely true
I hate what AI has done to the sparkle emoji. Give it back
Cant have fucking shit in Detroit
Cant have shit
Okay so door saga
The only way into my building is through the front door which locks itself when closed. There's a back entrance but it's deadbolted from the inside. This means the only people who can get into the building are me, my cat sitter with the spare keys, and the people living in the other two units.
The door to MY unit now... has no doorknob. Impossible to get in.
There is a shared BACK hallway that leads to the shared basement/back entrance. My back door into this hall is always deadbolted. EXCEPT, fortuitously, right now, since neighbor (Molly) in unit 2 had heard Patches meowing when alone and offered to spend some time with her, so I had the cat sitter unlock the bolt.
This, LUCKILY, means there is A Way into my unit. But it requires getting into the building, then going THROUGH my neighbors' unit into the back hall, then up to my unit.
Cat sitter is effectively locked out from Patches, and won't be able to get in if not fixed by the next day.
Text neighbor about predicament. They're willing to look at my door bUT (it's Christmas) they're not home and not getting home until the next day.
Next day, text for an update but hear nothing. (Neighbors aren't attached to their phones much). Communicate with catsitter saying "okay if I don't hear back from neighbors, maybe you go over and I contact a locksmith who you can let in?" (since cat sitter has the keys to the building)
Catsitter is very not keen on the idea
Patches is unaware she's a prisoner.
Hear back from neighbors. Say they should be home around 5pm.
Okay... Good Enough... (Patches graze-feeds so Luckily she hasn't missed any meals but we're going on 24 hours of house arrest Patches).
6pm comes. 7pm comes. 7:40pm I text asking for an update. Nothing.
8:30pm I'm figuring out what friends I can call to break into my own house. Text neighbor again and notice this text doesn't go through.
Text neighbor's partner being like "hey sorry, can't seem to reach Molly--". Get a text back "Sorry this is Molly on David's phone! My phone died." Family Christmas plans ran late but they're on their way back and will be home soon. Thank goodness.
9pm-ish, they get back, give Patches attention and top up her food. I get a text "David fixed your door!" Woo!
Friday 5pm I finally get home
Lugging my suitcase up three flights of stairs while I hear Patches meowing like a dying Victorian child
Shoes off coat off suitcase down fish out keys unlock door grab doorknob
...Doorknob falls off
Falls off right into my hands
Staring at doorknob. Staring at door. Patches meowing. Shove doorknob against door like an idiot and no it does not go back on.
Fucking
Go down flight of stairs, knock on Molly and David's door. David is luckily home. "My doorknob fell off again can I go home"
David lets me in. I scoot past their dogs and apparently I startled the more nervous one since she apparently tried to nip at me but I didn't even notice because I'm like my cat.
Get in through the back hall.
Patches comes bounding over.
My cat.
Doesn't even know she was a prisoner.
Doesn't even know what a doorknob is.
Later that night receive a text from neighbor apologizing for the dog and I'm like "I Did Not Even Notice."
Any attempt to leave my house now is perilous until I fix the doorknob.
Can't even leave my door cracked open because I know Patches is gonna shove her stupid little face through it and become the opposite of a prisoner.
I wanna go buy a reeces peanut butter cup but by god it's not worth the risk
I'm gonna try to fix the doorknob
Or... buy? a new doorknob?
On Amazon searching "doorknob".
Merry Christmas
You are completely right because I have now investigated the knob and can confirm the screw holding the knob to bar was loose. I have tightened the screw and it SEEMS fixed but Iâm very Fool Me Once on this since my neighbor also thought theyâd fixed it.
There is a Home Depot trip in my future. Or maybe an online purchase if Patches would get off my laptop
Merry Christmas I hope I know how to install a doorknob
Complication. Doorknob is here and I tried to install it, but because my door is older than God, the latch-majig (technical term) is offset like an inch higher than the knob. Modern doorknob has the latch LEVEL with the knob.
To swap in the new knob I'd need to cut a new knob-hole an inch higher in the door which
With what tools
That would leave an unused gaping doorknob-sized hole in my door which any robber the size of a weasel or smaller will use to rob my home. I don't need fucking Redwall in my home.
Probably bad for the integrity of the door
I don't wanna.
I think what I really want is just the knob like above tags said. Like the knob and the rectangular bar, which I can substitute in for my stripped-bare knob and rectangle bar. I WOULD do this with the new knob, but it's got two welded-on spokes poking out from the knob.
I can maybe drill two holes for the spokes in my door...?
(Squinting at shitty amazon listings trying to see if any knobs don't have the two spokes)
(I think the two spokes might be standard.)
Developing new respect for Jesus (carpenter).
In the meantime, because I'd already unscrewed a lot of things I DID take the genius action of flipping my current doorknob around.
This way the side that causes problems is on the INSIDE.
Doorknob fall of while INSIDE house significantly better than doorknob fall off while OUTSIDE.
I'm retightening all the screws.
Patches has offered no solutions.
So it does!
Never heard the term "spindle doorknob" before so I never would have found this on my own.
They're also all labeled "vintage" which extra feels right since my door predates the Cambrian Explosion.
Crowdsourcing my door fix on Tumblr dot com! Doorknob 2.0 is ordered.
At least 4,000 but we still got time
New doorknob should get here tomorrow, but in the meantime things in the notes of this post:
Several dozen stories of other people getting locked in/out of bathrooms/basements/classrooms/bedrooms/buildings. Extra shout out to the person whose classmate managed to do this twice, in rapid4reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesdweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
Patches is on my keyboard
whose classmate managed to do this twice, in rapid succession, to both sides of a classroom door after being saved the first time.
Several people taking this as a sign to go tighten their doorknob screws, including someone whose knob fell off in their hands while doing this
10 or so people reading the "can't have shit in Detroit" meme to mean I live in Detroit. Sorry to confess I'm a fake Detroitite. Doxxing myself by 0.00001% more by informing the world I live in not-Detroit.
Many many people wondering why I'm not pestering my landlord about this. Truth is my landlord is way too sexy, cool, fashionable, smart, pretty, funny, and popular on Tumblr to it's me. It's me. I'm me I'm my landlord. It's my condo. Including, with immense regret, every single doorknob inside.
3 separate professional locksmiths who have reached out offering advice, which is very cool. I have burst into a virtual hardware store clutching my shit doorknob and fainted, only to be caught by three very strong and cool locksmiths rushing to my aid.
Person with a story of dogsitting a friend's Tibetan Mastiff who managed to knock the entire backdoor down. Taking inspiration from this to train Patches in battering-ram techniques, should she ever get locked inside again.
DOORKNOB
ALSO MY PAPER TOWELS
(Ran out of paper towels)
Old knob coming off.
Wretched thing. Accursed knob of woe.
Get undid
New knob reign by forceful coup. Went to great pains to PRECISELY wait Patches is escaping
Patches retrieved
Anyway GREAT care was taken to ensure both knobs are ALIGNED, EVEN, SCREWED ON, with the wait hang on
Patches retrieved again.
Anyway
DOORKNOB SCREWED ON
KNOB
Still gonna keep the emergency screwdriver in the hall for probably the next month.
In conclusion look at my cat
certified door post
đđ„Čđ„Č
Took this little baby off the wall today, ready to pack.
Jeff was right
Julian Hooper 1. Introduction, 2016 2. Inevitable conclusion, 2016 (Acrylic on linen)
certified door post
âThatâs the best thing about language: every time you use a word you are summoning so many other thingsâall the times that word has ever been used. I know this sounds a little psychedelic, but maybe I have an ancestor one hundred years ago who used this word that I choose to write now. What does it mean that everything that we are writing is recycled? Words are full of ghosts. Poetry is full of ghosts.â
â Morgan Parker
peak romance
Wait, how literally... Waitâ
Carrot Ironfoundersson autism moments
I love them
"afterwards we couldâ"
Do you ever just want to fucking cry?
#oh... yeah. i just finished rereading Night Watch.#i always thought that Night Watch made the ''if there was no sam vimes you would have invented him.' 'i rather think i did.''#much more. interesting. like#what happens when the person you've been trying to guide someone to be more like IS them from the future#what's it like to have the person who left an impact on you when you were young stand in front of you now that you're old and know you're#the one who helped him be like that?#poor Vetinari is having realizations and thoughts about the past 30 years in real time and is trying to go#''heyâ I can't force you to talk about this but i need to. I'm not going to talk to someone else about it because it's a private personal#matter and I'm a tyrant not an asshole but can we talk about it? or at least think about it while in the same room?''#and Vimes is like ''nope. I'm going home to my wife and kid and trying to process whatever the heck just happened and not thinking about#work (and the implied ''and you'') at all''#and Vetrinari can't do anything. like. what's he going to do then? go back to the palace and stare out the window for several hours while a#cup of tea goes cold? poor guy#discworld#uh. sorry about the tag essay
extremely accurate tag essay from @thenonbinarysunstreaker
