He

[thecollectibles]

Pixel Art by SUN PIXELS

[catchymemes]

[undeadentropy]

Ironically, queen shit

[ambientwitch]

There's so much like "Wow I've never been kissed/sucked off/etc like this before" in fanfiction I think it would be funny if there were more fics about it just being kind of mid . And then the characters who have been pining over each other forever have to deal with that

[darksouls2yuri]

hey is it okay if i eat my nature valley oats and honey granola bar here. yeah its the kind that comes as a two pack and immediately disintegrates into millions of annoying crumbs. its okay my ants that follow me everywhere will eat them. youll have ants now though.

[theblackparadeisdead]

We have got to put an end to the taller younger sibling industrial complex

[tilthat]

TIL “Yankee Doodle” was written by the British to mock americans. “Doodle” is thought to come from the German “dödel”, meaning “fool” or “simpleton” and “macaroni,” a flamboyantly stylish type of dress, painting the Yankees as morons who thought placing a feather in one’s cap made them a “dandy.”

via reddit.com

[toastpotent-deactivated20250619]

so you’re telling me that “stuck a feather in his hat and called it macaroni” would be like saying “wrote a G on his belt and called it gucci”

[beggars-opera]

that’s…a pretty good analogy actually

[ti-bae-rius]

US moron came to town

Hunting for some coochie

Wrote a G up on his belt

And this bitch called it Gucci

[ti-bae-rius]

Seeing my notifications get flooded with this every July 4th is the only thing I respect about America

[disgustinggf]

don't let my tits distract u from the fact that i'm not ok in the head

[nilkadnaquada-deactivated202307]

don't let the fact that i'm not ok in the head distract u from my tits

[cloudstation]

I think indeed dot com should have a comment section

[cloudstation]

"no salary listed hmmm....... 🤔🤔🤔"

"BACHELORS DEGREE TO WORK RETAIL PLEASE SAY SIKE"

"'fast-paced high-energy environment' just say it's toxic"

[dct239394cvvd098dffgggp]

favorite kind of tweets that make me love people a little more

[sigmaleph]

filling a usps small flat rate box with scoops out of a large tub labelled “Neutron star”

[quantummindclassicalheart]

Follow-up Tweet:

[kitsune-35]

damnit!!

[shiverandqueeef]

hope it's clear to everyone when i say that buffy has more chemistry with her female foils then she ever had with an actual boyfriend that spike doesn't count. he was buffy's girlfriend

[blackpyrefly]

dress codes that arent ppe are stupid as fuck. as an adult human being with a (relatively) functioning brain i have never walked into a place and given a fuck what an employee was wearing. “professional” okay bitch i can make up adjectives too. “grundlous” see easy

[bunniope]

whats grundlous mean

[blackpyrefly]

of or pertaining to grundle

[funnytwittertweets]

[casmick-consequences]

literally the king of oneliners

[april]

📦 Shipping update: we're not delivering your parcel because you checked the tracking page too much and we got shy about it

[aliquistis]

I love how bad Astarion is with his cover story. You meet him and he's like "I'm a magistrate" then he stealths, disarms a trap, double dashes and backstabs a goblin all while giggling about spilling blood and you're just like hm yeah that's the legal system for you

[redundantharpoons]

thats just how public administrators be sometimes

[only-tiktoks]

[knittings-and-things]

@monsterthalia ALL THE LEAVES ARE FROGS AND ALL THE FROGS ARE LEAVES

[morkaischosen]

to the tune of California Dreamin'

[annacaffeina]

Leaves and frogs. Must be fall!

[thememedaddy]