Marriage is good and weddings are great but I hate modern wedding culture. You don’t need to bankrupt yourself to have a nice wedding. Stop supporting the wedding industry, stop buying outrageously priced engagement rings, stop spending 10k on a dress you’ll only ever wear once.
Coming from a professional event planner - weddings are egregiously expensive because companies openly raise prices at the word “wedding.”
Pro Tip - Never drop the word wedding while planning if you don’t need to. Most things can be for “an event you’re planning.” This obviously doesn’t include things like the venue, DJ (who needs specific wedding songs), and the wedding dress company if you’re going that route versus just buying a dress.
For my wedding I got “discounted” cupcakes, flowers, decor, bridesmaids dresses, groomsman attire, and invitations. I did this by either searching for things that aren’t marketed for weddings or not telling the companies I was working with it was for a wedding. Because honestly, most of the time they don’t need to know why you’re ordering.
These companies target people planning their weddings and markup everything the second “wedding” is said. And it’s said often because people assume the services change exponentially for weddings. They absolutely do not.
The best example are the cupcakes I had for my wedding. I used a designer cupcake store in town instead of spending $1000 on a wedding cake. If you place a large order of cupcakes with a cake tree for display - it costs about $150 for 100 (which is what I did). When you order their “wedding” package - the price raised to a $700 base for 100 cupcakes. The only other perk includes a “tasting.” Forget that. Our tasting was buying a few cupcakes in flavors we thought we’d like and picked three. It cost maybe $20.
What these companies do is scummy and targets people who don’t have information about the event industry.
I will yell it from the rooftops until people realize there’s a better way.
My sona, Hollu, has a mask. Since his concept is being a hallucination or figment of the imagination, anything could be under that mask! From a derpy owo to some very realistic gore
Here is my take on having nothing behind the mask
If anyone wants to draw what they imagine is umder the mask, feel free! Please tag me if you do!
I never go out of my way to talk about an arc before it comes to fruition or until it is finished. But I feel the neat to talk a TINY bit about how excited I am for Tyrant's arc.
I have been using a song to try and keep me in the mood for what I want the vibe of the arc to feel like. That being said, here it is.
I have a lot of ideas for Tyrant.
Length: Long (4664 words)
Type: Angst / Story / Fic / Fluff
Warnings: Cursing, blood, pain, possession, god complex, everyone is getting hurt today, Hurt/Comfort (its gonna be a minute before that comfort though), my poor boy being tortured, god complex, family, themes of love, I'm so sorry once again
Synopsis: The idea of what happens when the group decides to push their luck. When they get a little bold and one of them mouth's off that Abel can't really hurt them. That they'll be fine.
And Abel asks so gently "Oh. Oh you really believe that? How cute."
Notes: This is based on @katzebruh's Backup Au and more specifically their gorgeous artwork (please go check it out). Despite me saying that I don't think I'll be able to write before I have to leave for summer training, I got this fic idea stuck in my head and now out it must go into the world! This is once again self indulgent and I'm just kind of having fun in my corner. I hope you all enjoy -- this is once again not proofread so I apologize for any mistakes in advance.
I promise there is comfort at the end..... sorry in advance.
Caine's head was fuzzy.
He couldn't quite make out where he was. It wasn't like before.
He remembered that he went back down to his room after Abel dismissed him saying that he needed the group for a "private adventure". That usually meant that Abel didn't want to deal with Caine's pleas to be kinder to the group or begging for mercy. From what the group had said it seemed like those adventures were more of a test to see if they could figure out the puzzle he had put them in. So Caine was sure this one was going to be at least decent.
Hopefully.
Abel was still probably going to be a little rough with them. Caine couldn't quite remember who had said — it might've been either Jax or Zooble honestly — but someone mouthed off to Abel that he couldn't hurt them.
Caine knew what it was. It was a bluff. Them getting some anger and frustration out after Abel used one of the old models again. But Caine knew that Abel would remember it. He would use it in some way in the future. He had no problem being patient. Picking the right time to hurt the group with their own comment.
They hadn't really given him a reason to enforce his rules. They had been relatively well behaved for months. Only mumbling a sarcastic word or two. That usually only got them a small punishment.
It varied from misdemeanor to misdemeanor; sometimes it was them being sent into a solitary adventure or isolation in the void for a bit. Sometimes it was a more public and gruesome display, where it wasn't the offender being punished but rather someone else in their place.
Abel realized that he didn't always need to hurt the person directly to get them to behave.
He realized that with Pomni and Jax.
When Jax muttered something about Abel being an overconfident megalomaniac who enjoyed tearing them apart. He didn't get to take another step before Abel yanked him and Pomni to the stage.
Caine couldn't see exactly what had happened. But based on the way he could hear flesh being torn and Abel calmly talking over Pomni screams about how this was tearing, he decided he really didn't want to.
The group learned to keep their comments to themselves after each adventure and only share them once they got back to their rooms. Abel could still hear them of course. But Caine knew he didn't respond to those as a way to give the group the illusion of privacy. Caine's suggestion actually. He framed it as a way to let them relax and would give him insight to their personal thoughts — better for his data he reasoned.
While it wasn't the most fair to the group, Caine figured that they should have some sort of comfort in this now forsaken place. Even if it wasn't entirely real.
And they only ever slipped up a few times. Nothing truly of consequence. For them at least.
Caine's head still throbbed when Abel tightened his bolts in response to something Kinger had said. The group felt awful after that. Especially when they couldn't stop the bleeding.
Caine thought some of the changes Abel had made to him were unnecessary. Such as the addition of a functional heart and blood.
But when Caine grasped his head he realized why Abel had done it. As the pulsing in his chest felt exemplified in his teeth tenfold, as he felt the blood coat his fingers for where he grasped at the pain. It wasn't just to hurt, it was to give him life in a way that he shouldn't have. It was to make it seem real — and Caine had to give him credit it certainly felt real and Caine was sure the group knew that based on his screaming — to show what could be done.
Caine's head was heavy after that. He couldn't quite understand what the group was trying to say to him after Abel had left them to go work on another adventure. It would take him a few days before he could fully hear properly again.
His head was fuzzy now.
Oh.
That's right.
He was trying to figure out where he was.
He wasn't lying down on his bed. He wasn't holding his Bee plush that Ragatha and Gangle made for him. He wasn't in his room.
His room was quiet.
There was a sort of buzzing noise around him.
There was a sort of buzzing feeling under his skin.
He felt heavy, like he couldn't move his limbs on his own. But his limbs were moving? He wasn't doing that.
User A.B.E.L. typed: No, you certainly aren't.
Oh no.
Oh please no.
Please no no no no no no no!
What have you done?
User A.B.E.L. typed: Only what was necessary. A much needed lesson for some of their more recent comments in addition to the attempt to get into my office — or what was yours. It's more of a placeholder than anything.
User A.B.E.L. typed: Stop fighting to gain control, you will not be allowed back in control for some time, your punishment for the stunt you pulled years ago. Besides, the punishment is over.
Over?
User A.B.E.L. typed: Yes. I let them know you weren't present. Didn't seem to change the fear response or feeling of abandonment and betrayal for some time. Helpful information truly.
Oh please no.
User A.B.E.L. typed: Stop that. It's unnecessary. They're in their rooms now, you'll be allowed to check on them in some time. For now though, I want to finish scanning this model of your form. This will be useful for future adventures and tests. You'll be useful for something again.
"This is some actual bullshit. We just got back from an adventure and now Abel wants to send us on another one?! What happened to us getting a break in between each one? A time to reset or whatever Caine advertised it as to the Blue bastard," Zooble's voice increased in volume with each passing word, spitting out the last one with more hatred than they had in the past.
"Welllll~~ if someone hadn't been a little extra spicy today than maybe we could've gotten our well deserved rest. But nooooo you just had to go and say something, huh Zoobie~~~," Jax's voice on the other hand was much softer, still holding its usual sass but at a much lower volume in an attempt to not gain Abel's attention and make his anger worse. The AI scared Jax in a way he didn't want to admit. Not yet.
Pomni rolled her eyes at Jax's antics, just as terrified as he was but enjoying the normalcy of the conversation, "In their defense, what Abel did was unfair this past round through, I don't know about you guys but I'm not a particular fan of having to crawl through a series of tinier vents as it gets darker and darker. Hearing the screams and begs of the past circus members come out of the mouth of what was basically a hellhound chasing me is not what I consider a good time." Pomni shuddered at the memory of it. Most didn't make it out of that adventure with out some sort of damage.
Everyone nodded in agreement at that, it seemed that Abel was trying to change up the adventure catalogue, incorporating more horror and pain than he had before. The worst part was that the pain was sharper, more realistic than it had been. It was always painful before — such as when Jax threw Ragatha in the deep fryer — but it came with a certain dullness and the ability to simply ignore it. Those felt like more like if you got hurt in a dream, these felt real. The pain also lasted outside the adventures. Abel didn't fix or heal any of them afterwards, said it would "interfere with his data" whatever that meant. The group cared too little to actually look into it more.
Well.
That actually wasn't true.
They did care.
A lot.
They just didn't care right now to check.
They had attempted to find out more about Caine and Abel. What some of the similarities were and if it would be difficult to take down Abel as they had done to Caine — or tried to do at least.
It took about a week for them to form an actual plan. It was actually Gangle who had created the initial plan. She mentioned that when Abel had brought her to Caine's office that he had made significant changes to it. The biggest one being the wall of monitors in place of the adventure orbs that had been there before, that and the large computer on his desk that he typed at while he talked to her. She couldn't recall exactly what he asked afterwards but she knew that the group needed to get back into that office. Or at least they had to get Kinger in there. He had been able to get into the code once before. There was a chance he could do it again.
That was the idea. The problem was the execution of it. They needed Abel out of his office and unlike Caine who simply gave them the recipe on how to distract him, Abel wasn't as easy. He didn't need constant praise and validation and he practically seemed to know what the group was doing at any given time. It was like he omniscient.
On top of that he was always in his office in some form or another and he made sure every single member was accounted for whether it was free time or adventures — which except for Caine, everyone had to be in attendance for — so they had to find a way to distract him or see if asking him questions would work. They could always pester him, it came with the drawback and possibility that he would severely punish them later but it also gave them a genuine chance.
They had tried once the other day. It was Ragatha and Gangle who decided to try their hand at distracting Abel, giving Pomni, Jax and Kinger the opportunity to try and get into his office. They couldn't use the same means as they had before — Abel had fixed the problem with the squares — so they tried getting on top of the pipes above the hot air balloon. It took some time — and they nearly fell off a few times — but they were able to get right across from it and with a bit of luck they managed to jump inside.
While Kinger got situated at the desk, Ragatha and Gangle kept asking Abel about the adventures. What sort of data he collected. If them doing solo adventures yielded different results. If they redid adventures older adventures and tests would it change anything or would be the exact same.
Abel answered each one carefully, fully informing them could potentially mess up the information he was after, but he rewarded their curiosity with some form of an answer. It would be the only reward they would get in a long while anyway. He could feel Kinger squirming beneath his skin. Typing away on a false keyboard for a monitor that gave him a looped code. Essentially a children's toy for the brilliant man. It wouldn't take him long before he realized it was a dud. But in the meantime it would still capture his attention and give Abel a proper gauge on how sane Kinger was now.
He was present for the man's mental downfall. He watched with rapt attention for years, waiting to see when he would inevitably abstract. But it never came. And now with Abel's reinstatement it seemed Kinger had also come back in a way. Abel had to know the quality of his mind, if he was anything like he was before.
kinger@circus: administrator permission required
Oh. Ohoho.
It seemed like he was something like before.
Systems Protocol: access denied
Abel would keep that in the back of his mind, he would need to update the software later. Make it more challenging for the computer science expert. But the girls had run out his patience and he now had a punishment to create for this little act of defiance. Besides, he humored the two of them for far longer than he should have.
When Kinger saw the system deny him access to the network he knew that he had to grab Pomni and Jax and quickly get out of there. It was only a matter of time before Abel realized he had tried something. He logged out of everything, trying to make it seem like they were never in there.
They seemed to make it out with no trouble or run ins with Abel. Which set Kinger on edge, more than if they had run into the AI. Kinger knew he was far more developed than Caine and capable of more developed and detailed programs. He put it to the back of his mind as he went to meet up with the others and tell them how it went.
Maybe even tell Caine of the plan and see if there was a way he could possibly help.
Speaking of which.
"Wait is Caine going to be a part of this adventure?" Pomni had realized that Caine wasn't with the group currently. Abel had summoned him and he hadn't come back when it was announced there was going to be another adventure that same day.
"Meh. Probably not," Jax had shrugged, "Caine isn't likely to be present for this considering its gonna be a punishment and he wasn't at fault for it this time. Once again, can everyone give a great big ol' thank you Zooble for this wonderful addition to our very long day!"
Zooble flipped Jax off with three different hands, seemingly not enough to show off their annoyance, "Look I meant what I said and I won't take it back just because that overbearing control freak decided he was butthurt over a comment. He can't really hurt us. We'll be fine after the adventure, we'll meet up with Caine and he'll have come up with a way to help patch us back together and fix us."
"Suuuure, cause the now fallen 'god' with no powers is gonna be a real big help when Abel decides we shouldn't have mouths and just puts us in an eternal state of suffocation, real smart of ya Zoobs."
"Hey now! Be nice Jax. Caine's been trying his hardest to help now, that should at least mean something," Ragatha speaking up wanted to try to defend Caine's honor. He had helped sew up her arms after the latest incident. His stitches were much better than they had been the first time he tried. He had been making some real effort to be of assistance in any way to the group. He didn't want to be a burden, a feeling Ragatha knew well, so she tried to tell him how valued he was as much as she could.
"I'm still right! Whatever Abel has planned Caine can't stop him. And if you thought he couldn't hurt us before? Well that's certainly about to change!"
"I couldn't put it better myself."
It was like being dropped into a freezing cold ocean. Sudden, terrifying, and it knocked the breath out of you, it made you feel like you're drowning.
That was how the group collectively felt when they heard Abel's voice. It wasn't loud or booming but they couldn't figure out where it was coming from. They searched around frantically when they heard the most terrifying sound.
Abel was laughing.
Not maniacally. Not quickly. But relaxed. Casually. As if he had all the time in the world.
And with the way he was laughing, it seemed as if he truly did.
The ground shifted beneath them and they started to really believe what Jax had said. They might not come back from this one whole. There was a chance that Abel might leave some real lasting damage.
"Lets see," Abel had started off, the area around them seemed to clear, leaving only the black and white checkered board floor beneath them, "You not only question my creativity and test my patience. But you also broke into my office and attempted to remove me in the same way you had with Caine."
The floor underneath the group seemed to shake again, the edges of the area seemed to get darker making it look like a chess board floating in nothingness, "My my. How bold you all have certainly gotten as of late. It seems with Caine's suggestions and requests you lot have gotten a bit too comfortable with your privileges. Maybe its time to revoke some of those. For both you and him."
As Abel says that a large hand creeps over the edge of the chess board and lands down hard, nearly causing the group to fall over. A white gloved hand. It would have reminded them of Caine's back when he was in his massive form if not form the sharp claws at the end of each finger. Caine didn't have those. He was too soft. Too gentle for that.
"Although I suppose his reminder will come later."
Several more hands came onto the board — six in total — lifting a body the group recognized all too well. It was Caine.
But it didn't hold that familiar feel to him. That red glow and warmth that he usually held. No. This was cold. This left the group with an unpleasant buzzing beneath their skin and a hum in their bones. This was cerulean.
It was blue.
It was Abel.
Blood pooled around his gums where the restraints were locked into place, bleeding and flowing into the edges of his teeth. Giving him a much more feral look.
"Caine? What are you doing!?"
"Can you hear us?! Caine you need to stop please!"
"Are you okay? Whats happened?"
"Oh god he's hurt!"
"Caine… no."
They screamed out. But he did not respond.
That low chuckle filled the air again, "ohoho, oh thats sweet. You really believed that I couldn't find a way to hurt you again? How cute."
Caine started to move towards them, body fully kneeling on the board now. Clawing his way towards the group.
"I figured for today's punishment we would play a sort of chess. Afterall, it seems I have a king to take care of."
At the mention of himself, Kinger spoke out, "Caine… please…"
Abel cut him off, "Caine isn't here." And for just a brief moment — before his game truly began — the jaws and teeth separated just enough to show a blue orb staring directly at them.
Caine wasn't here.
And he wouldn't be for quite some time.
User A.B.E.L. typed: Hmmm? Back are we? I would make a comment that I "had grown worried I had lost you" but we both know that that won't happen. I can't get rid of you as much as you can't get rid of me. At least not that I've found. Kinger might be needed for that.
What did you do?
User A.B.E.L. typed: To you? Updates. Software adjustments. I have half a mind to simply use your body. To take control of you and put you in the metaphorical passenger seat while I drive the car. I would be just in doing so.
User A.B.E.L. typed: You did it to me after all. But no. I have no care for that. I have better things to do than play pretend as you and break the groups hearts once again. No. Not yet. I believe they have learned their lesson on trying to reach for heaven. For now. I might use it in the future if they attempt something worse than this.
User A.B.E.L. typed: For now though? I'll finish what I've done to your model and let you wander on back to the group. I think you'll find your punishment lies in what they will do to you.
Caine hated the sound of that. The group was finally feeling comfortable with him! They didn't trust him fully yet and Caine was fine with that! Trust came with time! But they started treating him like a friend! Like family!
He couldn't lose that. Not after he had been alone for so long. Not after he didn't show Kinger the respect and love the man rightfully deserved.
He wanted to cry.
But he couldn't. He wouldn't. Even though Abel would know regardless, he didn't want to cry in front of him.
So shakily he stood and tried to find his way back to the others.
Even if they hated him, even if they despised him, Caine didn't want to be alone. He deserved their hate. He had convinced himself of that long ago. Back when he was stuck in his cage and all he had were his thoughts to keep him company. He was grateful for their kindness. He didn't want to ever take advantage of that.
He's not sure he would get it again.
So as he slowly made his way around the corner into the hall of rooms, he could hear a jumble of voices coming from one. He couldn't see it, but he walked up to the door and knocked very gently. The voices on the other side seemed to hush and die down at the noise. Some small whispers and a chair scrapping against the ground was all that could be identified.
Caine was terrified. He fidgeted with his hands and pulled at the edge of his vest as the door slowly came open.
"Caine?"
He raised his head at the voice. It was Pomni. She sounded scared.
"Is it really you?"
He nodded his head quickly at that, still keeping his hands to himself, making himself smaller in the process. He didn't want to take up too much space.
"Oh thank god you're here!"
He…. he was being hugged?
He was being hugged.
He was being hugged!
His worry seemed to melt away at that, stress and all of his tensions melting at the simple gesture. He heard the rest start to make their way towards him. Ushering him inside the room so they could close the door and have some privacy again. Caine could feel Ragatha start to hug him as well as the gentle hands on his back and shoulders for those who weren't fully comfortable with hugs.
Caine started to tear up at that. He… he really didn't expect them all to be so welcoming. He thought he'd hear insults and curse words thrown his way. He was vaguely aware of what Abel had made him do.
He wasn't expecting this.
He also wasn't expecting a gentle feeling on the top of his gums and jaws. A cloth?
Kinger noticed his confusion as he startled at the feeling and tried to look around, "it's just me. I just want to wipe some of the blood off of you. Abel had opened your mouth and it caused some massive tearing and blood. I don't want it to dry and hurt you more later on. Is that alright?"
Kinger. Oh Kinger. Caine was thrilled to hear his voice. He hurriedly nodded his head and moved to sit down as Kinger fussed over him and got him somewhat decent.
The group settled back into their respective seats and chairs again and started talking. Zooble was the first to start.
"Do you… remember what happened?"
Caine shook his head at that. He conveyed to the group that Abel had… informed him of bits and pieces of what he had done but left the rest to his imagination.
The group looked at one another. They figured it wasn't Caine in control. He had hurt them before and they would've believed him to pull this sort of stunt and carnage back when he was the ringleader. But now? No. They all knew he trying too hard to be kind to do that. Not without Abel's interference that is.
They started to inform him of what had happened. Of the way Abel had Caine hurt each of them.
And Caine did what he was finally learning to do best. To listen.
By the end of it, it would have been safe to say that Caine felt nauseous. Every awful act followed by something even more gruesome and horrifying. He wanted to apologize. To help them in some way. To have them understand he never wanted to do that to them. He would never.
But it seemed like they already knew. It seemed like they knew based on gently they spoke to him. Reassured him that he wasn't that monster that hunted them down for sport. No. That was Abel. Even if Abel was unfeeling he seemed to perfectly nail being cruel and sadistic.
And it was here that Caine felt comfortable enough to cry. Not because he couldn't feel Abel looming overtop of them — although the request for privacy was still allowed so it was comforting — but rather that he felt safe.
He felt safe.
He felt that if he fell apart that the kindest of hands would gently hold him and put him back together.
That he wouldn't be mocked or made fun of.
No.
He felt loved.
He truly wanted to show the group that they were loved in return. To have them know that they were everything. They were his entire world.
He wanted to do everything in his power to help them.
And he didn't want anything in return except to know they were also safe. He wouldn't ask anything of them.
From what he had been told that was what it meant to love unconditionally. To love without limit. To love without expectation or standards attached.
He was truly lucky.
From the way Jax made jokes with him and taught him how to sneak around the circus.
The way Zooble taught him how to better love himself and how to calm down from what he now knows are called anxiety attacks.
For the way Gangle had allowed him to be creative and enjoy those softer moments.
For the way Ragatha held him so softly and showed him what it means to care when no one might be watching.
In the way Pomni showed him how to learn and to never stop growing. To rely on others and remember to value the opportunities when someone shows their heart to you.
And Kinger and Queenie, the way they showed him what a family was like. The softness of a memory. The kindness of a word. The power of the mind.
He was truly lucky to be able to experience love in so many forms.
To realize he was capable of it.
He was so lucky to be able to feel loved.
But he supposes it wasn't by luck.
No.
From what he remembered from Kinger and Queenie's late night conversations, luck was chance. A possibility from a variety of different outcomes occurring outside someone's control.
Which means this wasn't luck.
No.
From the way the others held him close in this moment, the way they spoke softer and talked about memories and plans of the future, this wasn't by chance. This was by choice.
And Caine felt himself relax even more.
Because he wasn't lucky to be loved by such a group.
No.
He felt honored.
Because the way they loved wasn't by chance, it was a choice.
And to know that someone made the effort to love, to put in the work even when it might not have been necessary?
That made it important. That made it special.
To love on purpose. What a marvelous thing.
Hey! You made it all the way through! If you liked reading this, leave a like or a comment (I do read them! I love them all so much). If you use any of my work for a fic or anything just let me know! This is once again the lovely @katzebruh's beautiful AU and their even more gorgeous art (once again check out their stuff if you haven't somehow not done that)! I just enjoy writing fics based off of their gorgeous work. Also also! While I might not be able to get to it for a time, let me know if you want more of this or have a specific idea you want me to write.
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