I want to tell someone what's wrong with me, I want to talk to someone, tell them that I want to die, tell them I hate myself, tell them I don't know what the fuck is happening to me anymore. Tell them that I don't feel real, my memories don't feel real, things that are actively happening don't feel real. It's like when you're reading a book and like it's happening in the book but you know it's not real, the characters don't exist, the events aren't happening, but like the book feels more real than my life to me than reality. It's like I can't process reality properly. I want to tell someone everything and I can't, I can't put that on someone else, everyone is dealing with their own things, real things, I'm falling apart from nothing. But sometimes I just want to scream at someone that I want to die












