the sky does great things now

I fled Twitter and all I got was my grandmas secret posting recipe and 15 cents to my name

[theskydoesgreatthingsnow]

What if instead of ag school it was called uni corn

[theskydoesgreatthingsnow]

Skink belongs at pride

[theskydoesgreatthingsnow]

They’re celebrating what?? And they call it Gape Pried????????

[ode-on-a-grecian-butt]

[theskydoesgreatthingsnow]

Hot girl summer this. Hot boy summer that. This summer it’s hot summer. Brought to you by Exxon

[theskydoesgreatthingsnow]

This pride remember to support queer run small businesses like Apple, OpenAI and Palantir

[depsidase]

[theskydoesgreatthingsnow]

Cowbaret

[theskydoesgreatthingsnow]

Dam girl u retaining water

[theskydoesgreatthingsnow]

Damned girl u cursed

[theskydoesgreatthingsnow]

Dame girl u noble

[theskydoesgreatthingsnow]

Dam girl u retaining water

[theskydoesgreatthingsnow]

Damned girl u cursed

[theskydoesgreatthingsnow]

Dam girl u retaining water

[theskydoesgreatthingsnow]

I have Reverse Benjamin Button Disease where I age normally

[pollsforadults]

You get transported into the universe of the last media you consumed. How are you doing?

This is better than my real life

I'm doing well

I'm doing fine

I'm not having a good time

I'm absolutely cooked

There is nothing different about this universe and my own

Voting ended onMay 29

[theskydoesgreatthingsnow]

Normal eyes normalize normal lies

[theskydoesgreatthingsnow]

No freedom till we’re Squeakqual, damn right I support it.

[pocket-size-cthulhu]

Romeo and Juliet retelling but it's a married couple who are planning to carve time out of their busy schedules to go out together, but she decides to take a little nap to try to get more energy to stay up later, and when he finds her asleep he assumes she's gone to bed for real so he goes all the way to sleep (I'm talking sleep mask + vaporub + white noise + melatonin, or whatever routine people do for a REALLY good sleep) and when she wakes up from her nap and finds him out cold she just goes to bed too. Tragic 😔

[bethanydelleman]

I need to build a collection of these low-stakes Modern Shakespeare retellings

[theskydoesgreatthingsnow]

Version of Titus Andronicus where … uh … ummm … I don’t think this one works

[theskydoesgreatthingsnow]

The vampire Lestat takes the Colbert Quesionaire and guesses the number he’s thinking of because he can read his mind

[theskydoesgreatthingsnow]

Hey I was just over at “remote desert with one palm tree” island and nobody there