Noah would argue that’s not only the best way to start your morning, but the best way to start your year, and there’s very little arguing back you can do when he’s got your mouth too busy with moaning.
“You know what they say, baby, breakfast is the most important meal of the day.” He chuckles, soft and low, the heat of his breath skimming your thigh as he tugs you closer. Your body glides along the mattress as you dip further into it, and he dips his head, brushing his mouth along your inner thigh, only to nip you lightly before dragging his mouth higher.
You’re barely awake, mumbled words about neither of you being up for breakfast yet all you can manage, but as you’re drawn from your slumber, Noah is slow, methodical, taking his time to assess the way your body reacts to even the faintest touch. It’s the same careful attention he gave you after settling himself between your spread thighs, already holding you to the promise you’d offered him the night before: you.
When your hands reach for him and your fingers bury into his hair, he knows he has you. The faintest smirk crosses his lips as his mouth ghosts back along your soaked cunt while you guide him there, pushing him closer. Tilting his head, he presses the tip of his nose to your folds, dragging slowly between them, feeling the wetness gather until he nudges against your clit. The faint pressure, in such an early morning sensitive state, makes you tremble and moan.
“Noah…” His name slips out soft and breathless as you hum beneath it, arching your hips slightly to encourage him. He obliges, leaning in and giving you exactly what you want—his tongue working between, lapping in languid, deliberate strokes, savouring the familiar taste of you as it spreads across his tongue. A muffled groan vibrates through you, sending a ripple down your spine as heat begins to coil low in your stomach. You try to roll your hips in rhythm, chasing the contact he’s giving you.
When his focus shifts to your clit, he’s gentle at first, circling slowly, exploring you the way he always does when he’s between your thighs. Then a sudden flick catches you off guard, pulling a gasp from your lips as your hips buck instinctively. His hands shift to cradle you there, thumbs rubbing soothing circles, holding you down as he pulls you higher.
He closes his mouth around your clit, sucking steadily, growing rougher in a teasing rhythm—alternating flicks, sucks, and licks, paying close attention to every reaction he draws, every moan, every sharp intake of breath. Your need to grind against him grows desperate as you tug harder at his hair, pushing him closer, using every means you can to chase the crest of your building orgasm.
Your toes curl as the tension rises, until it finally snaps. Noah feels it too in the rush of warmth against his tongue, and the way your clit swells and pulses. The faint movements of his tongue make you twitch and tremble as you fall apart for him, breathless and shaking. He doesn’t stop, guiding you through it with slow circles and lingering touches, lapping along your folds and dipping down to tease your hole, until you begin to come back to yourself.
Once you do, your body goes limp, chest heaving, and only then does Noah kiss his way up from between your thighs, along your stomach, your torso, your chest, your neck, until he reaches your mouth. The taste of you is heavy on his lips and tongue, and you accept it without hesitation, melting into his kiss as your hands slide from his hair down his back, pulling him down against you, and when he finally breaks away, he presses his forehead to yours, whispering softly, barely above a breath, “Happy New Year, baby.”
hope everything is okay with you since your last life update <33
Thank you so much 🫶
Hit a few more bumps in the road to finish out November, but December is looking like I will have plenty of time to get back to the things that bring me joy ❤️
toys — do they own sex toys? how often do they use them? do they prefer using them on themselves or their partner(s)?
toys and himbo!noah go hand in hand 🤝 not only is he extremely open to using them on his partner, he’s also very encouraging about his partner buying and using them, solo or together. he’ll even go as far as gifting one, whether it’s a regular vibe or a cloned version of his dick. a wand or a bullet is his weapon of choice, depending on where you’re fucking, and he’s not against keeping a bullet on him in case you’re both away from home and the moment calls for it. as for himself, he’s just as open to having toys used on him; cock rings, plugs, vibes, wands, anything really. he’s partial to a cock sleeve or a fleshlight, and he isn’t against the idea of fucking you while wearing one of those textured sleeves. he loves the way it feels against his cock, and how wet you get, and how wet it sounds, when he’s fucking into you. the wetter, the better for him.
wet — do they like bath/shower sex? would they have sex in other bodies of water (pool, lake, ocean, etc)?
shower sex is 💯 his favorite, and he’ll lift you up and fuck you against the wall with such ease, making it look effortless. he’s fucked in the pool before and would do it again, he loves nothing more than being a little sneak, tugging at your swimwear, swimming between your legs, and then pressing you against the wall of the pool for a hot, heavy make out session that often leads to fucking.
besties, i’m absolutely going to be writing more and continuing my II fic, fear not!
however, i’ve had some drastic life changes happen recently, and i’ve lost my job and am now dealing with a family medical emergency.
so, next chapter is going to be a couple of days late, unfortunately. i hate to keep you all waiting since it’s just started, but i hope you understand 💗
all of your support means so much to me! seeing the reception of my work- all of the likes, reblogs, and kind words make my entire day.
so much of what i do is purely for my own enjoyment, so i hope it’s okay that i link my art blog and my kofi here anyway. every single one of you has my entire heart, and i thank you for being a constant in my ever changing life 🫶🫶
for my art!
if you like my work, consider supporting me on ko-fi! you can buy me a coffee!
idk if ur taking requests and u can so ignore this if u aren’t but ur fic with vessel (idiots being in love smth like that) was sooooo good and i was wondering if you’d ever do any more angst/fluff type fics with vessel, maybe one where he’s jealous or protective!! ur writing is super good!! ur very talented <333
Your requests are always welcome! I’m a sucker for angst/fluff, I can never get enough. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to write this, and I hope you enjoy!
Warnings: jealousy, protectiveness, terrible communication, slight possessiveness, suggestive, tension, angst/fluff, mentions of panic attacks, mentions of sexual activity, drinking/drunk reader
Your feet dragged unusually slow on your way into the venue- your body seeming to act on autopilot. The hall was quiet, save for the chattering of various crew members waiting to load all of their respective gear into the venue. It was all routine by now- treading through crowded hallways, pushing loads of gear backstage, setting up for the show. Today it felt heavier, and you had begun to wonder if maybe life on the road was finally getting the best of you. That, or the unspoken tension harboring between you and the band’s frontman.
You couldn’t be too upset with him. The two of you had agreed not to paint the situation into anything bigger than it actually was, but the past few days proved that you were having trouble keeping your end of the deal. Had you actually been able to continue about your respective lives like it hadn’t happened, it might’ve been easier to swallow. But, you hadn’t seen much of him since that night, which spoke volumes considering you worked with him everyday. It felt like he was avoiding you, and you couldn’t tell whether that was your paranoia talking or not. The more time that passed, the more you realized it had been a lapse in judgement on your part- a moment of weakness. Still, your thighs ached with the memory of him.
He’d shamelessly taken you to another realm, and you wanted so badly to regret it. His hands held you in a way that had your heartbeat quickening just at the mere thought of it. The kind of touch that had you wondering if maybe you were more than just a good lay for him.
No time to entertain such nonsense, though. He was a passionate man, one driven by his music; a man who had a lot more to think about than a road tech who happened into his bed one night. You knew it was best not to get too involved- he would inevitably drag you around, whether he did so intentionally or not. Your stubborn heart was left wanting things that it couldn’t have.
There was a part of you that wished you could feel like you had made a mistake, but every fleeting memory of your night with Vessel could only make you a liar. The entire situation was beginning to weigh heavily on you, and every second that passed only suffocated you more. You felt like every crew member you made eye contact with was silently judging you, even though you knew very well that the only two people who knew about it were you and Vessel.
You needed a distraction. Where were the damn equipment trailers? The anticipation was eating away at you, your skin was growing prickly and your head began to swim. Were you seriously about to have a panic attack over this? Your inner monologue was due to begin mocking you, spitting hateful phrases in spite of what was already there. There were too many people in proximity to you, too many eyes that could witness, too many-
“Hey, you good?”
A familiar voice broke you from your spiralling train of thought. Every one of your nerve endings were on fire, so the speed with which you snapped your head to locate the voice did no favors in settling your racing mind. You barely registered the pair of hands that grasped hold of your upper arms before your feet were being shuffled away from your post on the wall.
“Come on, let’s get you some fresh air.”
The short trek back out of the building was a blur, but the brightness of the sun was offensive enough to snap you back to reality once you’d made it outside. Only then did you register the company you were in. Of course, your luck would have it that the tour manager was the one trying to talk you out of a panic attack. Suddenly your thoughts flooded with excuses- surely he was about to scold you for your lack of effort this week.
“You’re alright, just breathe-” he’d begun to work his hands over your shoulders, thumbs soothing through the fabric of your shirt. “In and out, there you go.”
You tried hard to follow his instructions- really, you did. But there was something terribly distracting about the way he was handling you. Discomfort didn’t seem like the appropriate word for it, but something about it felt wrong. You knew him well enough, though- knew that he was a respectable guy. But your heart strings were beginning to tug; you were starting to feel like you were absolutely fucked, pining after somebody unavailable to you. Somebody who you wished hadn’t been the source of your distraction, somebody who you wished was here right now to bring you comfort.
You managed a deep, stuttering breath. “I’m so sorry, I’m fine, really,” A single step back didn’t provide the distance you desired. He fixed you with a look, one that said he wasn’t at all convinced, but he was kind enough to humor you anyway. “Just having a rough few days is all.”
He smiled kindly, finally dropping his hands back down to his sides. You noticed how he glanced beyond you briefly, but didn’t think too much of it. The moment had grown a little awkward, but your inner will to fight through it allowed you to power through. He was only trying to look out for you, after all- and for that you were grateful.
“Don’t be so hard on yourself. Touring isn’t necessarily an easy job,” he made like he was going to continue, but his eyes shifted behind you once more before you felt somebody else’s presence. You barely had the chance to glance behind you, not thinking of how worn your eyes might’ve looked, before realizing a couple of the band members had appeared in your line of vision.
“Everything okay over here?” The smooth drawl belonged to II, the quiet yet bold personality of the band. As fate would have it, Vessel was the one trailing behind him, and he looked less than pleased to see you. You’d wager your wet eyes completely gave you away, there wasn’t a single doubt in your mind that he would figure out that he had something to do with all of this. Before you could think to stop yourself, your hands wiped quickly below your eyes, finding that a couple of tears actually had escaped. Great.
Stubborn as ever, you held your head up and shot an unconvincing smile towards II. A sniffle escaped, but you choked out a quick, “Nothing to worry about,” before turning on your heel and starting for the door. You felt like your body was betraying your mind- your eagerness to appear nonchalant was near impossible when you couldn’t get the ringing in your ears to stop. There wasn’t any way for you to know whether any of the three men had called after you, or had attempted to check on you again, because your hand found the handle to the door, which you flung open and trekked your way back inside.
-
Things had continued normally after that; well, what had become a new normal, anyway. Lots of avoiding the band as much as your duties would allow, and keeping to yourself in an attempt to hide the overwhelming agony festering inside. You knew your efforts were beginning to become suspicious; every day, multiple times a day, numerous people were approaching you to ask how you were holding up. It had become a same story, different day routine. And still, every day felt heavier than the last.
On an off day, several of the crew members had invited you out to get drinks, to which you had begrudgingly agreed. Part of you figured you could use something to take your mind off of the hole you’d buried yourself in, and they had presented you with a golden opportunity to do just that.
Drinking wasn’t actually something you did normally- maybe on some special occasions, but you certainly weren’t used to getting drunk. It had been your own doing, choosing to accept every drink that was offered to you. By the end of the night, two of the crew members you were closest to walked on either side of you, steadying your wobbling steps towards the tour bus you slept in.
“Are you going to be okay? That was an awful lot of attention you garnered tonight.” one had joked, pinching playfully at your cheek. You giggled and lightly slapped his hand away.
“I’m fine,” the slurring of your words suggested otherwise, but you mustered the strength to pull yourself up the steps and shoot them both a look, “Next time people want to buy me that many drinks, you better help me finish them.”
Just as quickly as they laughed, their faces fell. Their awkward shuffles backward prompted you to turn around to look at where their gazes had drifted over to. Lo and behold: Vessel.
“I can take her from here, lads,” he spoke smoothly, like he hadn’t just appeared in the doorway of your sleeping bus, not his. What he was doing here, you couldn’t tell. But you did know that seeing your friends retreating from the situation and leaving you with him was not a comforting sight. You turned quickly, ready to push past him. “Had some fun tonight?”
You scoffed, barely meeting his eyes. “Just enjoying some time off.”
He nodded then, his lips pursed. You worked hard not to blatantly stare at him and settled for just watching him through your lashes, every now and then looking back down at your feet. His sharp inhale almost startled you, but he continued, “There are safer ways to do that, you know.”
He said it so quietly you almost didn’t catch it. Something about his tone and his behavior was stoking the fire that had been burning within you for too many days now. There was heat behind your actions, it had to have been obvious the way you shoved past him abruptly. He caught your arm before you could make it too far. “What?” you hissed, turning back to face him. His grip was tight enough that you didn’t bother trying to yank your arm away from him.
“This feels like reckless behavior from you.”
Your jaw dropped. “Reckless?”
“Yes, reckless,” he tugged you forward enough that you stumbled over your own feet. He didn’t let you fall, though. “You take one of the only days you have to rest and what? Get piss-drunk from people you don’t even know? With people you don’t even know?” his breathing sounded laboured, like he was struggling to keep his composure. “What if something had happened?”
You wanted to laugh- more than that, you wanted to scream. Scream at him. Who was he to judge how you spent your time? After he’d fucked you and slung you aside, no less. Remarkably, you kept your voice down when you pulled yourself free from his hand. “Careful, you’re starting to sound like you care.”
“Well,” he looked at you, something a little too familiar swimming behind the indifference in his eyes. There was the faintest crack in his facade, and he spoke quietly amidst it, “Gods forbid that be the case.”
“Oh?” you did laugh then, incredulously. You shook your head, stepping backwards towards your bunk. It wasn’t until that moment did you remember that there were probably people trying to sleep, and you weren’t about to disturb them because of him. “You’ve got no place to be acting like you care about me.”
Your voice had lowered to a whisper, that alone beginning to cut through the tension filling the small lounge space on the bus. He stayed silent, shockingly, and merely watched as you began to retreat towards the sleeping compartments. You’d almost made it through the threshold when you felt his hand grab yours, and suddenly you were being dragged down the steps and off the bus completely. Almost immediately after your attempt at keeping quiet, he had forced you to forget about it. Several protests slipped from you, not silently, before the chill of the night air welcomed you again.
“Vessel! Let me go,” you growled. He ignored you and pulled you along behind him until you were standing several yards away from the interior lighting on the bus. “Vessel-”
“What exactly were you trying to prove tonight? That you’re willing to get yourself hurt? And for what? Fun?”
You couldn’t believe what you were hearing, what he was accusing you of. It was like he was trying to make you hate him- trying to prove that you had, indeed, made a huge mistake giving yourself to him that night. The sensible side of you, though small, was fighting hard to overcome your need to lash out at him. All of the days you’d spent boiling over your own stupidity was spilling over at this given opportunity.
“What are you talking about? Hurt? I’m very obviously fine,” you gestured over yourself. “I wasn’t even alone-”
“And the drinking? You’re honestly going to try to tell me that you don’t know why people were buying you drinks all night?”
To be frank, you felt at a loss for words. Nothing he was saying was untrue, but you weren’t sure what point he was trying to make. So some strangers sent you drinks? You consumed them safely, with two people there to watch you and get you back safely. Maybe your state of mind was a little altered at this moment, but what was the underlying issue?
You took a deep breath, trying to find your composure. “You’re going to have to let me in on what you’re trying to get at. All you’ve done is recap my night for me.” You crossed your arms, eyeballing him as he began to pace back and forth in front of you. He was agitated, that much was obvious.
“What if you had been alone?”
You rolled your eyes. This was beginning to feel like you were going in circles with him. “But I wasn’t, Vessel. And even if I was, I don’t understand why you think that it’s any of your concern.”
He huffed, stopping shortly. There was the faintest rim of red around his eyes- you noticed it when he finally looked at you again. It looked an awful lot like the way your eyes had been looking every morning for the past week. “I came to your bus looking for you, and you weren’t there. Nobody had seen where you had gone.”
“And?” You crossed your arms at his stubborn silence. He toed at a rock, avoiding your gaze. Several moments passed where you impatiently awaited his response, so eventually you moved to walk away when none came. That seemed to kickstart him though.
“No, wait-” he hurried. You spun on your heel to see him pushing a hand through the front of his hair, tugging frustratedly at the strands. “I just… was worried when you weren’t where I thought you would be.”
His awkwardness might’ve been endearing if he hadn’t spent the last week ignoring you and the last few minutes criticising your choices. “Okay? So you were worried, and now you see you had no reason to be. How does that explain why you’re acting like I’m some child that needs to be looked after all the time?”
“It’s not that. It just felt wrong not knowing where you were or who you were with.”
A silence fell over you. As much as you wanted to pry better answers from him, you knew better than to think he’d actually give them to you. It was clear that he wasn’t telling you the truth, and you were too tired - and too drunk - to will yourself to keep arguing with him. You nodded, finally relenting, and once again made for the entrance of the bus.
“Please wait,” he whispered. Had you been sober, you might’ve heard that it was more of a plea than a request. The manner of his tone caused something to lick through you, settling the ever-present fire that had ignited. He sounded desperate. For what reason, you still didn’t know. But you were approaching the point of being ready to give up.
You faced him once more, the anguish written across his face sobering you up a bit. “I’m fine, Vessel. Safe and sound.” You assured him gently. He nodded and bit his lip, eyes flickering away and back towards yours over again.
“I know,” he took a breath, his chest stuttering enough for you to notice. “I’m sorry. I just finally worked up enough courage to come talk to you and you weren’t there. Kind of felt like a sign.”
He’d come to talk to you. You wondered if it was worth it to ask, or if you should wait until the morning when you were back into a clear headspace. Then again, by morning he might retreat from you again, and you’d never know what he had to say. Using all of the courage you could muster, you looked him in the eye and asked, “What did you want to talk to me about?”
The way he smiled read of embarrassment, uncertainty. For a brief moment, you wondered if you’d overstepped yet again. But then he fixed you with a shy smile, one hand reaching to scratch under his jaw nervously. “Wanted to see if you were okay. You seemed upset the other day,” his eyes flashed with the memory, like maybe he regretted not checking on you then. As though he thought maybe you wouldn’t have gone drinking tonight had he not distanced himself so plainly. “And I missed you.”
You couldn’t hide the surprise from your face even if you tried. But there was a nagging feeling that told you that he still wasn’t giving you the whole story. “That’s it? You’ve had quite a bit of time to come check on me since then. Why today?”
Something dark clouded his eyes. He shook his head, offering you no answer. At that, you scoffed in disbelief. “You’re not seriously about to just breeze over this like you didn’t just throw a rock into my garden tonight because of it.”
You stated it so plainly, not asking it as a question- almost accusing. There was a moment, so brief you almost missed it, that you believed you knew what the real answer was. Of course, you were too stubborn to let him off easily by letting him know that.
“Well, it’s been kind of hard to find you alone, tonight being no exception.” He spoke with his arms crossed, effectively shutting you out. Still, you saw through it. It read so obviously you couldn’t believe you didn’t see it before. He was jealous.
You nodded, mouth dropped open in an ‘O’, fighting a cheeky smile. Vessel’s head tilted slightly at your expression- in any other world you would’ve felt bad for being unable to hide the fact that you found this entertaining. But, this felt like an opportunity being presented to you on a beautiful silver platter. He was jealous, and he was trying to hide it.
“I have to say, Vessel- I never took you for the jealous type.”
“Jealous?” he laughed nervously, sputtering for what to say. “I wouldn’t say it’s jealousy, it’s-”
“Jealousy,” you said in a sing-song. He uncrossed his arms and glared at you, though there was no real heat behind it. “Just admit it, it’s okay.”
He made no attempt to hide his distaste for your cooing tone. But, the flush coloring his neck was a little too enticing. It was obvious he wasn’t willing to cave and admit it. Maybe it was the alcohol still coursing through your bloodstream, but you felt a surge of confidence given the current situation.
Slowly, you stepped closer to him, your fingers dragging playfully up his chest to rest around the back of his neck. “Would it help if I said jealousy looked a little cute on you?”
Vessel huffed, but the display of his hands around your waist betrayed him. His head dipped enough for his nose to brush against yours, the feeling of his breath mingling with yours all too familiar. Keeping your focus with his fingers digging into your flesh was no easy feat. He chased for your mouth, allowing you to relish in his annoyed sigh when you leaned back away from him.
“Darling,” he breathed. He tugged you closer, your hips meeting the tops of his thighs. Gods, he was making this teasing game hard to keep up with. You bubbled over with giggles at his expression after several blocked attempts at kissing you. He growled from the back of his throat, his hold near bruising.
“Admit that you were jealous.” You were already breathless. Vessel had dipped to nose at your neck, inhaling the scent of the perfume you’d sprayed earlier. He hummed, the vibrations coursing through your skin. Your fingers massaged lightly where they gripped his neck, feeling the tension dissolve with every movement.
“No,” He remained stubborn, lips trailing up your throat, chasing your lips, only managing to plant a soft peck on the bottom one. “Because I wasn’t.”
You would’ve laughed if he hadn’t mouthed at the corner of your lips. Your eyes had fallen shut, but you could feel the smile gracing his mouth. The urge to squirm in his hold was becoming overwhelming, you were losing at your own game. But his behavior when he was wound up was all too intriguing. Amidst your passion, you managed to pull back enough to peer up at him through your lashes. Another huff of annoyance left him when you leant back away from his distracting mouth. “Admit it.” You tease.
“I wasn’t jealous,” the huskiness of his voice nearly undid you. He dipped after you, so much so that your back was near bowing with your knees threatening to buckle. “Now come here.”
hiii bb 💕 what is one of your favourite headcanons you've given the sleep token boys? whether it's something you've written or not for a little lore drop 🤭
I am SO glad you asked 🤭
I may have gotten a little carried away, one headcanon turned into... a couple LMAO
But, I loved this as an opportunity to word vomit about my favorite boys, so thank u 🫶
-
Vessel
Vessel is, in every sense of the word, a lover. He’s soft, gentle, and sweet. Nothing you could ever need or want is beyond what he’s willing to give you. His heart beats for you. He believes that his duty, his purpose, is to be yours. He’s absolutely love-stricken, purely devoted to you. No matter how many times he’s felt the press of your lips, it never fails to steal his breath. He’ll smile against you, not pulling back, just allowing himself to feel the softness of your breath mingle with his. And when you rise on your toes to capture him again, his mind goes blank every time.
That being said, I think there’s a quiet possessiveness to him. Not in a toxic, controlling way. In the sense that, you are as much his as he is yours, and it would be rude for anybody not to see that. Sometimes there’s a lingering undercurrent of need to prove himself, to seek assurance from you. “Are you happy?” He’d ask. Everytime, you’d say, “With you? Always.” And he’d remember the very reason he’d made it this far, how he’d found his reason to look forward to another day. Every moment he spent with you was enough to fuel his next breath. To him, you’re everything.
He’s so soft and cuddly, to the point you almost experience cuteness aggression. He liked to roll his eyes, turn his head away from you when you’d grab the sides of his face and squeeze, but you knew very well that he always got a kick out of it. And you’d be right, too. His tummy erupted with butterflies, having someone - especially someone like you - express adoration toward him… knowing that you felt for him the same love he felt for you, was enough to make his head spin. SOMEBODY SEDATE ME
I just think our beloved god of the gaps/demon of sodom is really just a big softie.
II
I imagine II being hard to read. When you met, you were convinced that he was completely indifferent toward you. Not that he didn’t like you, just that he didn’t seem to lean either way when it came to how he felt about you. He was quiet, always seemed to keep cool under any circumstance. That is, until you’d been hanging around backstage, messing about with III, and ended up with a graze on your temple from a piece of rogue equipment. The speed with which he’d happened upon you was remarkable, you barely had time to register what had happened before he had your head cradled in both of his hands, his eyes full of worry while trying to assess the damage.
He’d been so gentle with you, cleaning and bandaging you up, keeping a watchful eye on your every move. It had been you who made the first obvious move. After finally being convinced of your wellbeing, he’d urged you to stay away from all equipment, to which you’d told him it was worth it since you got to have him handle you the way he did.
“You’re trying to say you’re willing to risk a head injury so that I can fret over you?”
“Whatever keeps you invading my personal bubble- I’ll take my chances.”
The flush of his cheeks, the warmth in his neck was enough to tell you where exactly you stood with him.
II also exudes a very quiet confidence- a cockiness, even. Once you’re together, there’s no doubt in his mind that you’re irrevocably his. Those people ogling you from across the street? (Despite the very obvious fact that it was his arm you were clinging to) He felt no need to feel any type of way about it, they didn’t need to know you weren’t available, because he knew, and that was what mattered.
III
III is the type of partner that you never share a dull moment with. He’s goofy, a tease, always doing something for you to get a kick out of. Even in his softest moments, his playful nature is slipping through. You’re supposed to be relaxing on the sofa, unpacking your respective days, but somehow you find yourself perched upon his lap, his hands cradling your hips gently. Every few moments, he interrupts you with a kiss, only to pull away cheekily and say, “Tell me you love me.”
“I love you,” you whisper, a wide smile on your face. He squeezes you in his grip. “Prove it.”
There’s never a moment spent where you aren’t the center of his thoughts. Even when he’s on stage, he’s thinking of the moment he gets to wrap you up in his arms, the bright smile you always greet him with as soon as the ritual is over. You are his entire world, sometimes he truly wonders how he’d survived without you. No need to dwell on it, though. You were his, and he wasn’t the type to have any doubt about that.
I always picture III to be a great cuddler… when he’s awake. A soon as sleep takes him, you’re better off on your side of the bed. Those long limbs of his are wonderful to be held in, make no mistake. But once he’s out and his movements become unconscious, he becomes one with the sheets, tangled in ways that hardly make any sense. His thoughtfulness isn’t to be missed, though, because he always makes sure there are plenty of spare blankets equipped on the bed when he inevitably holds the one you were cuddling with hostage in his grip.
IV
My dear IV… he is a cuddle monster. Clingy, even. PDA is absolutely not off the table for him. He’ll gladly cradle you in front of him, forcing the two of you to walk awkwardly when out and about. He’s the type to never let go of your hand- you could be dragging him along and he would follow happily. He doesn’t want to be apart from you. You’re turning in for an early night? So is he. You needed to take a shower? No- “we need to take a shower”.
He likes to babied. When he’s had a long day, and he curls up next to you on the sofa, his head heavy in your lap- he all but purrs at the feel of your fingers carding through his hair. He tries hard to tell you about the day he’s had, but eventually his words begin to slur and his eyes slip shut. The sound of his snores, his peacefulness, is the most soothing thing in the world.
He tries not to, but he falls into jealousy every now and again. He’s good about facing his feelings head on, not deflecting them onto you or swallowing them down. It took one argument, and only that one, for him to understand how important his communication with you was. It was the moments when you thought he was asleep, and you gazed at him so lovingly, held him so gently, that he knew better than to question your devotion to him. Every fiber of his being wanted to out himself, let you know that he knew you were ogling him, but he couldn’t help the rush - and the swell of pride - he felt to know how loved he was by you.
He will shamelessly pout whenever you’re unable to be near him. Too many times did one of the other boys whack his shoulder for not paying attention to them- his eyes fixed on your form, stood across the room where you were chatting with a crew member. If his hands weren’t on you, there was no doubt that his eyes were. He didn’t care about the guys picking on him for it, he knew you adored the goofy grin he wore whenever he was staring at you.
I am legit giggling and kicking my feet at Chapter 1! I love this fic so much and can’t wait for more! To quote your fic when it comes to ii “God Help Us All”
So not to sound greedy, because you do whatever you have to do when you have to do it….but do you have a rough outline of when you’re wanting part 2 to be done?
Thank you 🫶🫶🫶 I’m so glad you enjoyed! I’m just as excited to piece this all together and get it to you!
I’m beginning on part 2 tonight! If it happens in the same way part 1 did, I’m thinking I’ll be able to publish it by Sunday 11/09. Fingers crossed 🤞
Foot size anon- I’m 6 foot tall, and I have the same foot size as my shorter MUCH shorter friends, sometimes tall people have small feet it happenssssss and it makes us really clumsy too lmao
Omg I can’t even imagine 😭 im just imagining the struggle trying to balance on small feets lmao. my feet are small too, even giving that I’m short, like I could shop for shoes in the children’s section 😂 We can rally an army of small feet havers
Being a full-time nanny, working to care for II's infant son, means having to join him and the Sleep Token boys on tour. Many new experiences await: figuring out how to live life on a tour bus, navigating the growth and development of a baby, and seeing just how much you're able to take when it comes to raising a baby with a man who gets off on giving you mixed signals.
Disclaimer: This is purely a work of fiction! Anything portrayed in this story that reflects the real lives of the Vessels is a coincidence and not done intentionally.
Feet padding softly against linoleum flooring, your footsteps echoed softly throughout the otherwise quiet corridor. A few steps ahead of you was the head of security, his footfalls much more practised than your own. This was all very unfamiliar to you, the amount of fuss being made over your arrival was a bit much to take in all at once. Of course, you were aware it wasn’t your arrival that was being awaited, it was the 10 month old baby happily babbling away atop your hip.
He squirmed excitedly, like he knew what was waiting for him at the end of the hall. The noise behind the closed door was boisterous, exactly the way that you expected it to be, and it did little to ease the nerves racing along your veins. It felt ironic, the way you were attempting to soothe the baby who was growing more anxious by the second, when you yourself felt like you could choke on your own breath.
“Someone’s excited to see his daddy, huh?”
Your head shot up, catching the eye of the man ahead of you, who was peering over his shoulder with a kind smile. You forced one of your own, peering back down at your shuffling feet.
You didn’t need him to let you know that you’d reached your destination, the crescendo of noise was enough hint, but he delivered you politely anyway. “Here we are, miss.” He stepped aside, pushing the steel open and leaving you room to step inside. The air seemed to shift upon your entrance, all of the attention now directed at you. The chaos of the pre-show engulfed you, as well as the attention of IV, who was the first one to approach you.
“Do my eyes deceive me? It seems my favorite lady has finally joined us,” he stepped hurriedly over several items strewn about the floor and welcomed you into a warm, comforting embrace. “I was starting to think we wouldn’t see you.”
A scoff fell from your lips, but you stepped back just enough to grin up at him, adjusting the baby on your hip. “You didn’t think I could stay away from you guys, did you?” It was a light tease, one that fell easily, as it often seemed to when around IV. Your eyes scanned the room, taking note of the absence of the man you were really looking for- the father of the baby you held, who was proving to grow more difficult to keep a steady hold of. “Where’s II?”
IV fixed you with a smirk, a gleam in his eye you couldn’t quite place. He lifted his chin to nod behind you, fixing his gaze just above your shoulder. “Ah, and here I thought you’d come all this way to see me.”
“IV, please,” II sighed deeply from behind you, closer than you would’ve anticipated. It was certainly in character for him to already be at his wits end this time of day, that much you had gathered in the time that you’d known him. “She’s had a long flight, leave her be for a moment.”
IV grinned wickedly, eyes darting between your eyes and the space where II stood behind you. He shrugged easily, hands up in mock surrender. “She loves me the most, II. You just need to make your peace with that.” At that, he threw a playful wink at you, pinching the feet of the squirming baby before turning on his heel and moseying back over to what he was doing before you’d come in.
In the same moment, you smiled gently and spun to face II, who greeted you with a kind smile of his own. Outstretched were his hands, preparing to greet his son, the baby you were hired to be a full-time nanny for. His face, usually so calm and collected, was split in a goofy grin at the sight of his son wriggling excitedly toward his hold.
“He’s excited to see you,” you cooed, handing him over, only a little thankful for the weight being lifted from your side. You swore he got heavier each time you picked him up, but it’d be a lie to say you hadn’t grown a little fond of it. II took him gratefully, face collapsing in adoration immediately. You thought of the day you two had met, how he’d spun his worries about solo parenting into a web that was now permanently stuck in the back of his mind. You’d promised him then, and intended to make good on it, that you would do everything you could to help make this possible for him. Moments like these made you wonder how he could ever doubt himself as a father. He was a natural.
“-And you?”
His voice, the end of whatever he’d been saying to you, broke you from your trance, and you tried like hell to fight the oncoming flush to your cheeks. “Uh, sorry. What were you saying?”
His chuckle was warm, and your gaze fixated on the baby, the way he bounced gently from being perched against II’s chest. “That was a tough flight then? I asked if you were excited to see me.”
You knew you must’ve looked ridiculous; your mouth opened and closed, struggling to find purchase on something to say. II held you in his gaze, his smile toward you only growing wider. Was he teasing you? He took the liberty of nudging his shoulder against yours, assuring you that he was, indeed, messing with you. You shuffled your feet a bit, still caught off guard, but managed to hold your ground and laugh sheepishly.
“Well, he and I argued most of the flight about who was more excited to be graced with your presence, but I decided to let him win,” you reached out to pinch the baby’s cheek, reveling in the bright smile he gave you. He was slowly becoming the reason you were wondering whether or not it was normal to become so attached to a family you weren’t technically a part of, and having II begin to warm up to you day by day was doing you no favors in convincing you that it wasn’t.
He had made no move to retreat from his position near you, one of his feet practically occupying the space between both of yours. The intensity of his stare made out like he was trying to read your thoughts, and you tried hard to ignore the pinch in your belly.
“Well,” he began, turning his head back towards his baby. “Make yourself at home, love. We’ve got rooms booked tonight, if you want to go ahead and get some rest at the hotel. Your room key is in my bag.”
“I can’t miss my first show!” you exclaimed, only partly in jest. You really had been excited to see the band perform, having not been familiar with them prior to meeting II. It was a slippery slope then, maybe one you would’ve considered a guilty pleasure. Had you come about them from outside of your personal connection, you would’ve held no shame. But something about your peculiar situation made the whole thing feel a little off. Still, you weren’t going to pass up the influx of live music that was about to rule the next month of your life. “How much longer until you’re on?”
“An hour maybe? Sound check’s already done, we’re just waiting to dress and then we go,” You nodded in response, glancing around and trying to map out the room- where everyone was, what they were doing… “Have you eaten at all?”
You shook your head, stepping back a bit to lean lightly against a folding table. “Not yet. I fed him before we left and then again as soon as we got off the plane. He’ll probably be hungry again before bedtime, but I’ve got teething crackers in my bag in case he gets fussy before then,” you looked around then, noticing that the luggage one of the crew members had taken from you at the airport was nowhere to be seen. “I think someone already took the rest of our bags to the hotel-”
“I was asking about you,” he cut you off gently. Oh.
Well, that wasn’t anything to get all worked up over, was it? You were a dutiful caretaker of his son, it made sense that he’d take initiative to look after you as well. Still, there was a pit of something swirling within your tummy. You’d grown a lot closer to him in the weeks leading up to his departure for this tour, and you’d spent some time reflecting on the position you held in his - and his son’s - life. There were times when it felt like it was more than just being the nanny, but you knew well that you’d be a fool to allow yourself to entertain that idea.
“Oh, well- I’m sure there’s a snack machine here somewhere? I’ll just be gone a minute-”
“Why don’t you sit down?” II took hold of your elbow gently, a small tug pulling your back into a more upright position. “Get settled in, and I’ll send for a crew member to fetch you something decent to eat. And don’t even bother arguing-” he cut you off with a stern finger before you could take a chance to protest. “Let me do this for you, I’d like to edge IV out for your favorite guy one of these days.”
He topped it off with a cheeky wink, and you knew there was no way of hiding the warmth in your cheeks this time. Opting for an easy way out, you smiled gratefully and placed a light tickle on the dangling foot of the baby before you moved to make way over to one of the lounge seats in the center of the green room.
Several crew members shot greeting smiles toward you in your short trek across the room, to which you waved shyly in return. These moments served as a bitter reminder of what you would inevitably lose when the time came that you were no longer of importance in II’s life. Lately, every moment spent alone with your thoughts left you to wonder what your life would look like when that time came. Only time will tell…
“Lovely! I was about two seconds away from dragging you away from your little family bubble with II,” III wasted no time plopping down next to you on the sofa you had perched yourself on, stretching a long arm around to rest on the cushions you were reclined against. IV appeared on the other side of you, planting himself on the arm of the sofa. “I had a mind to be a little jealous.”
“Nothing to be jealous of, III. I’m the one you’d need to be worried about.”
You laughed, a real laugh, topped off with a roll of your eyes. “And what is all of this about you being my favorite, IV?” Your hand moved on its own accord, slapping playfully against IV’s knee, which was the closest part of him you could reach. “What if I was keeping secrets, and Vessel was the one you both needed to worry about?”
III gasped, a hand thrown over his heart in jest. “You wouldn’t! I may not be all abs and sexy sweat, but I’m a very lovable man.”
“Of course you are!” you pinched his cheek between manicured fingers, and he nuzzled into your touch, much like a cat. “You’re the cuddliest, lankiest of my favorite boys. No argument there.”
He sported the goofiest, most endearing smile. The way these guys had taken you into their little group so willingly, it was hard not to feel completely welcome. They were all too sweet underneath the thick layer of chaos within them.
“I don’t know how you guys don’t crash as soon as the day’s done,” you slumped back into the couch, resting your head and closing your eyes against the bright fluorescent lights above. “I can’t imagine having to do what you do all day, all I did was fly on a plane and I feel ready to turn in.”
“Aw, love,” III rubbed your back soothingly, IV placing a reassuring pat on your shoulder. “We’re not the ones that are full-time parents, you know.”
Both boys seemed completely oblivious to the misspoken words, but you made no effort to correct it either. It wasn’t totally wrong, anyway. You might not have been the parent, but you certainly carried a good chunk of that weight. If anything, it was a mere stretch of the truth.
When deciding to take on this situation, this involvement with II, you’d have never guessed you would’ve gained more than just another nannying job. Now, you have friends, a steady job, something to look forward to everyday. That, and a lot of complicated feelings. What would you do when II didn’t need you around anymore? When all of this was just a memory? It was a harrowing thought, one you thought could make your head explode if you let it. Too many racing thoughts to deal with, you allowed your shoulders to slump and your body to relax into the space where IV’s leg rested beside you.
“You know, if you needed help waking up, I could probably scrounge the depths of my mind for some ideas,” You couldn’t actually see IV’s face, but you’d wager his expression was nothing short of cheeky, in the same way it often was. You barely opened your eyes to register the shake of III’s shoulders, trying to contain his laughter, before his attention shifted.
“I can’t bring her anywhere, can I? Leave her alone for one second… what is it with you two?” II.
III burst open then, a contagious laugh, and threw his head back in joy. It was a never ending form of entertainment, watching them torment II, specifically the kick they always got out of it. “Look at our II being all protective. No need to be such a helicopter, daddy. We’re just livening up our dearest.”
The air shifted amidst II’s presence- you had begun to notice that recently. It bubbled in your chest to clarify that you were, in fact, just messing around, though you weren’t sure where that need was coming from. Would it matter? Aside from the obvious inappropriate-ness of being too friendly with his bandmates and friends, of course. No more inappropriate than potentially beginning to pine after him, though.
You turned your head to the man in question, his gaze already set upon you. His eyes scanned your face, seemingly in thought. Your hand moved before you could think anything of it, and you placed a gentle pat on IV’s knee before shifting closer to III, creating enough space to accommodate II.
He waved his phone, stepping over IV’s legs to sit down beside you. “I’ve got something ordered for you, one of the crew members is picking it up.”
He may as well have offered up his soul to you just then, the way the other boys erupted into coos and teasing lilts. They made it impossible not to want to bury your face in your hands to hide your embarrassment in your flustered state. You needed a reality check- you could not have been any more conspicuous. A small “Thank you,” was all you were able to manage in return.
He ignored his bandmates, no doubt more than acquainted with the concept, and turned his head toward you. “I’m starting to think Peanut prefers you over me, he wanted to fuss as soon as you walked away.”
You smiled at the given nickname, III was actually the one who’d deemed it suitable for II’s baby, and it had stuck since then. You figured it was rather fitting.
“Well who wouldn’t?” III cut in, reaching to pinch a strand of your hair and twirl it around a finger. “I get fussy when she’s not around too.”
II’s resting face held a permanently unimpressed look, you had come to know. The current one he wore was beyond withering, but you couldn’t help the amusement tugging at the corner of your mouth. His stare shifted to fix on you, and for a second his face cracked. The barest of smiles peeked through, and he chimed cheekily, “Yeah, me too.”
“Oh my gods, II,” you sighed, exasperated, shaking your head in an attempt to disguise the fact that you quite enjoyed this side of him. It was a tiny peek into the man behind the one you normally dealt with, and you couldn’t help but to be drawn in. He turned from you, striking conversation with IV about some tech equipment you could never try to understand. If it weren’t for III poking your shoulder, you might’ve kept staring at him.
“I think you lot have rubbed off on him,” you accused. III seemed too delighted by the whole interaction, and you knew you were in for a very long tour. “He spends a couple of weeks back under your influence and now I’ve got another cheeky vessel to deal with.”
“Best get used to it, darling. Seems to me like you might be stuck with us.”
-
Soft whispers from a hushed voice pulls you from a much-needed sleep, the fatigue and jetlag still settled deep in your muscles. As you uncurl yourself from your position in the bed, attempting to blink the sleep from your eyes, you take note of the dimness of the room… and II. He sat hunched over the foot of the bed, gently hushing the baby, and trying to soothe the excited kick of his legs.
The rustling of your awakening was enough to draw his attention, and your stomach clenched upon catching his gaze, noticing the soft smile drawing on his face. Just as soon as he looked at you, he looked back down at the little chaos monster wiggling against the sheet you were still buried under. “Hope we didn’t wake you, love. We were trying to be quiet, weren’t we?”
His cooing settled the ever bustling baby, and he looked over at you again, this time his focus stuck solely on you. “Sorry for just letting myself in, I wanted to see my little man and didn’t want to wake you. Seemed like you needed the rest.”
With the little bit of energy you had, you were able to push yourself upright, waving a hand half-heartedly once you were sat up, the sheet pooling over your lap. “I don’t mind, I actually didn’t mean to sleep so late,” you glanced around the room suddenly, feeling the need to avert your eyes from his steady gaze. “Was he awake when you came in?”
II shook his head, not once peeling his eyes from you. You felt a sudden awareness of your sleep attire, and the fact that currently you were only dressed in a pair of soft shorts and a loose cami top. It was hard not to notice his traveling stare, even harder not to think anything of it. Hastily, you cleared your throat, effectively bringing II back into the conversation. Barely another second did he catch your eye before his attention shifted back down to the baby. “He was sound asleep.”
You huffed a tiny laugh and nervously ran a hand through your hair, knowing the possibility that it was a wreck was pretty high. Still, you gathered some courage and threw the covers from over your legs and slid from the warmth of the bed. The advantage of II’s attention being preoccupied allowed you a moment to stare, to map out the shape of him. The curve of his shoulders, the way he sat at the end of the bed you just slept in, and the way his colorful fingers danced over and tickled his baby boy. The movement of his hands was a little too captivating- you took only a small moment to wonder about the gentleness of his touch. A fond smile, full of adoration - and maybe a hint of longing - graced your otherwise sleepy features. There was no telling what you must’ve looked like right now.
A quick shake of your head pulled you from the whirlwind of your own spiralling thoughts. “So, what’s the plan today?”
You knew the gist of the itinerary; for you it consisted of watching the show tonight, and preparing to hit the road afterward. Life on a tour bus was near on your horizon. What you weren’t sure of, was what was expected of you during the many hours before showtime. It depended on what II wanted, really. He may ask that you stay hidden up in your hotel room with the baby, or he might request that you hang around the arena and take care of the baby there. Either way, your own personal goal was to keep out of the way as much as possible.
II glanced up at you, his eyes catching on the bare skin of your legs, and you were once again reminded of the fact that you were hardly dressed. It took every ounce of your willpower not to overthink the seconds his stare burned into the skin of your thighs. “I’d like it if you and Peanut came along with us, just so I don’t have to worry myself sick about where you two are. I’ll feel better knowing you’re at where I’m at.”
“Yeah, of course,” you nodded. With an awkward shuffle of your feet, you began to back towards the tiny hotel bathroom. “If you’re okay for just a little bit, I’ll get washed up and be ready to go soon?”
II fixed you with a smirk, picking Peanut up and shuffling him to face you. “We’ll wait right here for you, darlin’. Little man likes to make a fuss whenever we leave you,” his eyes darkened mischievously, “But, I do too, so I can’t really judge.”
You fought hard not to smile whilst rolling your eyes, lest you let him in on the effect he had on you. Opting for the avoidant route, you stepped closer and bent so that you were face to face with Peanut. “Your daddy’s trying to lay it on thick, huh?” He squirmed in excitement, as if he understood anything that had happened in the last several minutes. “Don’t let his bad behavior rub off on you, sweet little angel.”
“I’m afraid the charm comes built in, sweets. He’s already done for, if he’s anything like me.”
You threw one last look over your shoulder as you swept along the room towards the bathroom. “Gods, help us all.”
Holy hell holy fuck I’m so excited for more of the nanny fic!! I wasn’t ready for it to stop😩
I am so happy you enjoyed!! I was writing and writing and felt like I needed to put something out before I got carried away 🤭 I hated to end it so abruptly but first chapter is already coming along! I can’t wait to give it to you 🫶🫶
Okay so I don’t have any ST friends so I’m telling you because I can’t hold it in any longer and I’m anon because it’s dumb.
So we all know ii is like 8” shorter than vessel or something ridiculous like that lol. So then tell me WHY do they have the same sized foot?? Why and HOW?? Is this part of the reason why ii struts?? (Obviously his hips own 99% of that strut but still).
Thank you for your time.
bestie I am your new ST friend pleaseeee give me all of your thoughts!!
I am SO glad you say this because I can think of a very specific photo I saw ages ago and literally all I could focus on was his feet 😭 why is our short king packing around the feet of an above 6’ man??? I am currently on the hunt for the photo I fear it must be shared
theartofmadeline
romaincrisis
kianamaiart
andulkaphoto
gummygunk
