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i didnt get the job.

#it was such a gimmie i don't know how i fumbled the interview #i haven't been able to land any external interviews and there's not going to be other internal opportunities for the foreseeable future #so now my bf is going to insist on looking for a second job and he's got enough going on #I'm gunna fucking crash outtt

aurpiment

“It’s easy to assume”: someone’s misconception is about to be amiably corrected

“It’s tempting to assume”: someone’s assumption is about to be criticized

“It’s comforting to assume”: someone’s assumption is going to be read for filth

longseasons

let's all go out and buy pink refreshing citrusy fruity sexually arousing drinks

austimpowerz

MOODBOARD FOR WHEN SHIT IS FUCK

laqueus

cyphir-spacerobot

Victor Frankenstein after achieving the impossible and building a fucking person from scraps of the dead: Oh god, ew, ew it's ugly! Yucky! Yucky! Gross! Ew! Ew! Yucky! Yucky! Gross! Ew!

koiagain

animentality

#i will be having a job interview next week and you WILL be hearing from me

chickenfarmersan

yougottabeniceforwhat

desiccantdonoteat

needlepointcursewords

notsoterriblymisanthropic

the one addition that truly makes this clip even more powerful is knowing that Mr Sterling is this guy:

I am in awe trying to imagine the sheer levels of non sequiturs they would be able to produce together.

bogleech

New reaction meme just dropped

kosmogrl

we got august this week

bruntalism

we kill the bat man

getocakes

#wouldn't you like to know weather boy

hungry-hobbits

"get ready for video games to become unaffordable" video games haven't been affordable for the last 10 years

#i will never financially recover from pokopia

fairycosmos

sooo annoying that my parents didn't provide emotional support growing up now it's a whole fucking thing

#only growing up?

pangur-and-grim

she cries if I dont hold her, so I have to use my exercise bike like this

pangur-and-grim

#one of my cats needs 10-14 hours of human contact a day because he has never known real danger in his indoor life #he's sleeping on me right now #the other one purrs if you baby-talk at het. you don't even need to touch her #“cats hate you and they're aloof” they're usually just weird with guests dude

toskarin

the biohazard symbol really was a winner. that thing looks scary

#that's the point of safety symbols really #if they can't immediately paint a picture for you (eg. someone slipping over or a fire) then they should give an appropriate level of dread #and the biohazard symbol does a great job at making anyone know they should respect what they're looking at

vogelpsittacines

Illustration by Sophie Lucido Johnson

galah-xy

Hearing US news is starting to sound more and more like a Welcome to Night Vale podcast

"People have started selling their belongings to prepare for the rapture. Meanwhile, Tylenol sales have dropped as people fear it may cause autism. And now, the weather."

#we are recalling lettuce and lettuce by-products

64mpg

“but if i communicate it perfectly then they will understand me” WRONG 10,000 years of suffering

#autism moment

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