Having read some of the things I’ve written over the years I realize that even in the darkest moments of my life I was never as full of despair as I have been over the past year. Looking back at the years that have passed I realize that I have lost all joy and have forgot to live.
I was a child. I was a teen. I was carefree. I was joyous. That’s what he loved the most about me. No. That’s not what he loved about me. That’s what he was missing in his life and that’s why he couldn't live without me. He couldn’t live without joy. My joy was his “aqua vitae”, as he used to say. But that one glass of wine that had kept me going for all these years have now succumbed to the darkness I have always had deep within me.
He took my light and left me in dark.
And now I am just like him.
Existing, without joy and without hope.
He took my light and left me in dark.
And now I am a burden to him.
Growing dim, day in and day out.
21:09
07-02-24







