I don't even know why I am here because apparently I don't know what's happening in my life and I'm so fucked up I could cry like right now. I have friends. You know. Those little special people that make your life easier and brighter. I have them. Actually I have a *best* friend and some people I actually care about and that care about me. I'm happy with them, they make me smile and especially my bestfriend is the one that is always there for me no matter what. But. I'm dealing with a situation that I can only define as awful. I'm young so I'm forced to go to school and school here is not like different people for different classes. I have twenty classmates and I am forced do live with them six hours per day, two hundreds days per year, for five years. And guess what. I can't stand them. Not ALL of them, of course, but fuck I fucking hate some of them because they're always silently judging everyone (including me) and I can't stand their awful looks, I can't stand their attitude, the way they make me feel, the fact that I'm always thinking about what they could be saying about me and the fact that I'm losing my concentration, my enthusiasm, my smile because of them. This is making me sick. It's unhealthy and I fucking can't stand being like this because of this shitty people. I don't know what to do. I have no idea. I have to live with them for another year. I simply have to and I fucking hate that I have to because they're ruining the best fucking time of my entire life. I feel so lonely. They constantly make me nervous and anxious and I can't live like this and I don't know what to do. I feel like I'm sick. Sometimes I don't want to go to school or even to get out of my house. I don't know what to do.
















