your heart : a silver medal .

here is an  upside down  eden

[thunderlost]

               IT ISN’T THAT HE IS UNACCUSTOMED TO APOLOGIES   ,     the words slipping so easily through his lips within the confines of his family home in the same frequency some hold their daily prayers but here  ,  beyond blood relation and familiarity and the list of things he is   usually   bowing his head low for     ━━━━━     here   ,   he finds the act difficult .   pride  ,  normally  ,  would be the tether tying his tongue to the roof of his mouth but in this case   /   in   her   case   ...   it is guilt  ,  shame  ,  the knowledge that her time playing puppet to a vague demon’s whim is something he had a direct hand in .

at this point  ,  he simply desires to be friends   /   at this point  ,  even that seems a fever dream .

❛     ah  ,  alexis  ...     ❜               gaze directed elsewhere  ,  down and to the left and focused   /   unfocused upon the scuffed flooring of the school library  ;  his tone is quiet  ,  though the setting has little to do with it .               ❛     about  ...  about the society of light  ,  thing  ,  that’s   ━━     ❜               swallow .  an anxious shift within his seat as his head bows ever lower .               ❛     ...  i’m sorry .  if it wasn’t for me  ,  then  ...  i’m sure you would’ve been fine  ,  right ?     ❜

@angelicyber​     /     (  s.c  )  kinda fucked up that the closest i’ve ever felt to you was when i inadvertently dragged you into a cult  ,  huh ?

[thunderlost]

               HE LIKES TO THINK OF HIMSELF AS RELATIVELY BRAVE     all things considered  ,  perhaps not of a   heroic   level but certainly far beyond that of a   scaredy cat  .   he also has been known to lie  ,  both to himself and others and   pride   won’t allow him to simply come clean about it but there is a   chance   that as he   screams      (   high pitched   &   sharp on the ears   /   he fumbles with his flashlight and nearly drops the damn thing   )      upon seeing what is ultimately a   familiar face   that he may be more of a wimp than previously imagined .   maybe .

❛     ━━   juudai !!   don’t just sneak up on people like that !!     ❜               if he’s pink in the cheeks we’ll pretend not only that it is   not   from embarrassment  ,  but also that it isn’t there to   begin with .   a breath is taken  ,  irritated sigh exhaled to match the scowl etching itself unto his features as he stares fellow student down  ,  not caring particularly that he is pointing the flash light almost directly in his face at this point .               ❛     what are you doing out here anyway ?!   it’s the middle of the night !     ❜

as if he  ,  also  ,  is not out out of bed in the dead of night .   but that’s not what matters .

@kuriibro​     /     (  s.c  )    if anyone asks  ,  i don’t even know how to scream 

[thunderlost]

oh just a note b4 i dive into shit --   if your blog is dub - centric that’s  :ok_hand:  &  by default i will have jun referring to your muse by their eng name   (  unless otherwise stated ofc  )   but !!  please please please   please  refer to my muse as  jun  /  manjoume in our interactions  /  ooc chatter  /  what have you  ,  thank you  !!

[thunderlost]

tiny lil starter call !

[thunderlost]

jun has a little black cat named   hotaru   post - canon ; she’s about half the size of your average full - grown cat  &  has very quiet mews  &  likes to look you dead in the eyes while chomping her little teeth down on your breakfast and then  sprinting away  with it in her mouth at high speed 

[victini]

*puts my hand on your shoulder* listen. I DID mean to make you upset and i DO think your opinions are shit

[thunderlost]

anyway some quick points re :  my fire emblem 3h verse 

i .  jun is from the empire  &  his family is   incredibly  prestigious  ,  respected  ,  and knowingly   feared   by nobles and commoners alike .  they control several large plots of land vital to industry  &  resources for the country and those within their territory are taxed heavily and literally   cut off   from acquiring wealth or resources past a certain threshold to prevent a rise to power from any of them .

ii .  manjoume chosaku  ,  his eldest brother  ,  is one of the emperor’s favored advisors as well as the head of foreign relation interactions while  manjoume shoji  ,  his older brother  ,  is in the head of several large organizations and has essentially monopolized trade and the distribution of vital resources  ,  able to sell them at whatever price he so desires with little opposition .  manjoume jun  aka jun himself  ,  is currently being bred to become a   military general  ,  essentially to take a position  just below  the emperor in terms of military command .

iii .  as a result of the above  ,  the manjoume family is relatively close with the royal family and jun spent actual time with edelgard  ,  hubert  ,  petra  ,  and ferdinand during certain points of his life .

iv .  he’s prodigal in terms of strategy  &  combat ability but   hates fighting  /  killing   though he hides this fact given the expectations placed upon him .  he primarily uses swords when forced into close combat but prefers to use magic  ,  which he is more than merely proficient in .

v .  he possesses a major crest of hisakawa  ,  passed down to him from his mother  ,  while chosaku possesses a minor one  &  shoji possesses none at all .  this crest grants him more durability  /  faster recovery time  &  those with it are said to be born lucky  ,  something he’ll make pompous statements regarding but does not truly believe .

vi .  he has a baby wyvern pre - time skip  &  post time - skip when it’s grown up he rides her into battle .  her name is twilit and she regards jun as her son despite him having raised her and not the reverse and if you get too close to him without his permission she will not hesitate to bite the fuck out of you 

vii .  he is recruitable  to another house by byleth and if such is done  ,  he is not present at the beginning of the time skip   ( unless you’re in crimson flower )   but if you had a B+ rank with him he can be pulled away from the empire during a battle upon his defeat to fight on byleth’s side instead .

[thunderlost]

                ❛     ━━   for the   last time  ,  the advantages of fusion over ritual summoning are duel dependent  ,  but generally it’s easier to   ━━   augh  ,  will you  listen when  I’M TALKING TO YOU ?!     ❜               fists bang against the table top as voice raises  ,  positively   bristling   with irritation as brows furrow above narrowed eyes to   glare  at the boy sitting across from him .    that he’s here at all is nothing short of a miracle and that juudai would take such a fact into   zero consideration   is painfully unsurprising  ;  jun supposes the fool here  ,  then  ,  is   himself   for knowing the outcome yet still  ,  somehow  ,  being roped into agreeing to be a   study buddy  for the boy who   sleeps through his classes .

(    ‘  pleeeaaaase manjoume ???  c’moooon i know you’ve got some of the best grades in class !  you gotta help me out  ,  i think my life really may be in danger if i fail another one of those tests !   you wouldn’t just let him  KILL ME  would you ??  manjoume ??   please please please pl   ━━  ’   )   etc  ,  etc  ...  plays the memory in the back of his mind like a   broken record   detailing the starting point of this evening’s mistakes and oh  ,  the irony of a past plea versus present situation is  :

if chronos doesn’t kill him  ,  jun thinks  ,  he just might .

❛     that is   it !   we’ve been here for an hour and i don’t think you’ve heard a single thing i’ve said !   i don’t care if you’re determined to fail  ,  juudai  ,  but don’t waste time i could use actually studying trying to drag me down with you !     ❜

@explodinal​     /      (   s.c   )   not that he needs to study  ,  truthfully  ,  but it’s the principal of the matter .

[thunderlost]

                ❛     i already said i’m fine !     ❜               aggression laces his words  ,  dripping like a   venom   as he snaps at his classmate  ,  whirling around on his heel with lips pulled back in a snarl  ,  jaw clenched and fingers   fisted   inward towards scabbed palms that pull and tear and once more begin bleeding out through slits within his flesh .   it   hurts  ,  truthfully  ,  a bolt of   pain   shooting through his arms that he   ignores   in favor of lashing out  ;  he’s held his anger tight through far more agonizing situations than this .               ❛     do you have working ears ?!   or are you being this annoying on purpose ?!     ❜

breathe in  ,  breathe deep .  he turns from her  ,  again  ,  tone quieter now but hardly lacking in sharpness .

❛     if you wanna be helpful so bad you can   leave .   i don’t need any of your help  ,  especially not with such a stupid little cut   -----     ❜               he says  ,  as he unfurls his fingers with a soft   hiss   ,  skin briefly stuck together now forcibly unfolding  ,  minuscule droplets of blood splattering soundlessly against the ground .   he really should get proper medical attention  ,  he knows  ,  but he’s   stubborn   and more than that embarrassed  ;  he’d rather not have to explain how this happened  ,  particularly in the wake of his public loss to   juudai   yet again .   two  different wounds  ,  both stinging sharply .

@castitatli​   /   (  s.c  )   bleeding is familiar  ,  at least   ;   this compassion is a far stranger thing

[thunderlost]

                ❛     ...  no .     ❜               is his slow greeting  ,  watching   energetic girl   nervously  ,  quickly  ,  approach him and while she has yet to open her mouth he has   no doubt   that she desires something from him if only by the expression on her face .   his own fault  ,  sort of  ,  for having given her the time of day in the past and while he doesn’t understand how that could be misconstrued as   friendship   or the   desire for such  ,  he’s come to learn that the students here are   stubborn   in their assumptions .   irritating  ,  though familiar .               ❛     i don’t know what you want but i’m not interested in whatever it is .     ❜

@thuskindlyiscatter​   /   (   s.c   )   bribery is never out of the question  ,  however 

[thunderlost]

tiny lil starter call  !

[incorrectgxquotes]

Manjoume: Oh, so when crows remember people who wronged them and hold grudges, it’s “intelligent” and “really cool” but when I do it I’m “petty” and “need to let it go.”

[thunderlost]

me :  has 2393402 things i should and need to be doing me :  ya ok but look i made some babies  [ x ]

[thunderlost]

manjoume rly likes gudetama once he discovers what it is  (  juudai :  you know , gudetama   /   jun :  ... ?   /   juudai :  ...  the lazy egg guy ?   /   jun :   the  what  )  and has a tiny charm of the lil dude on his bag from S4 onward

[thunderlost]

haven’t you heard ?  rich boys don’t have hearts .   you stare at the box within your trembling fingers  ,  heartbeat thudding against the polished wood and   /   duh .  you think that’s any kind of news ?   /    dirt piles higher  , and then higher  ;  flooding this self - made grave    (  you think you catch your mother smiling in the reflection of your shovel  )   |   a low activity rp blog for  manjoume jun  ,  as beloved by  nyx   |   personal blogs do not interact

[thunderlost]

on a different note , jun  &  asuka ?  best friends  ,  strong support systems for each other .  lesbian  &  gay solidarity .  become so close that personal space isn’t an issue .  jun lays his head on her lap n she pets his hair  ,  she sits next to him and leans against his shoulder and he wraps an arm around her  ,  tickle fights !!!  ,  play fighting !!!!!!!  ,  etc etc  ...

konami :  um ... asuka ... lovs juudai ... n jun lovs ... asuka ... me , lifting them up :  they both misinterpreted an intense desire for something else as romantic feelings  &  upon sliding into adulthood realized the truth of the matter  &  became exceptionally close .  jun stopped chasing asuka shortly after their beach duel  &  instead just tried to be friendly with her .  thank for coming to my ted talk .

[thunderlost]

i’ll need to refresh myself n do a proper meta later but ... reminder that it’s more than plausible that jun never rid himself of the white light in his head but merely suppressed it as juudai was never able to personally destroy it with his abilities   (  jun threw the match  /  essentially tore himself its control and his victory was ... self destruction , rather than juudai winning it  )   &   i think often about how it’s likely waiting for jun to hit rock bottom mentally so it can sink its claws back into him and i just   : )))))))))   neato .