building bridges 🏳️‍🌈🤝♀️

working on a book, podcast & webseries 🐇

[tirfpikachu]

howdy gyns, i'm lay :]

gnc wheelchair dyke (she/her)

audhd, always laying around*

tirf & the og nuancefem ✌️

writer, youtuber, & beginner artist

bun mom of two scoundrels <3

always accepting more caffeine on ko-fi ☕🍩

kudos to @celestefem for club gyns art :]

& my collab blog is @pokegyns

made this a sideblog! main is @laysplaining

here i will give project updates, and edit & repost old thinkpieces of mine to make bingereading my writing etc a bit easier. askbox is temporary closed while i set things up on this new blog.

talking in Big Letters sometimes. for feminism 🫡

*ᵗʰᶦˢ ᶦˢ ᵃ ˡᶦᵉ ᵖˡˢ ᵐᵃᵏᵉ ᵐᵉ ˡᵃʸ ᵃʳᵒᵘⁿᵈ

The Fascinating World of TIRFs, Trans Radfems, and Trans Activism on Radblr

I went down the forbidden road, notebook in hand, a book to write. What I found disturbed me, enraged me, fascinated me, and inspired incred

[tirfpikachu]

ok back to hiatus bc wrists fucked up

on discord @ bunnyrats

[bruzum]

[friendlyfreakazoid]

it’s kinda funny in a sad way that there was that research paper years back that found that lesbians are most likely to be victims of homophobic abuse by the various people in their lives (such as their parents, relatives, friends, coworkers, etc) but everyone decided to interpret it as if it were saying that lesbians are the most likely to abuse each other and then used that false info as a way of furthering the homophobic abuse against us 🙃

[tirfpikachu]

"gender dysphoria is misogynistic" is actually so disrespectful to ppl with dysphoria & detrans women. it's completely ignorant.

dysphoria is a SYMPTOM. someone having a chronic symptom isn't misogyny. they're fucking suffering. it can, at times, have root in misogyny or trauma, & be healed over time. same as how, sometimes, being disabled means having a wound that can heal over time, and other times it means smth completely different with chronic illness.

dysphoria can be episodic, temporary, permanent, or semi-permanent. misogyny trauma can make you more sensitive to it, more prone to it, but it doesn't mean chronically dysphoric ppl are somehow inherently enabling misogyny. it oftentimes just means they want to live as the opposite sex. that can be for a variety of reasons, good or bad. you don't get to make these assumptions abt someone's mental state or reasons for transitioning. you can't paint everything with a wide brush. extremes are more satisfying, but a middle ground is more realistic.

you don't need to make grand statements.

is dysphoria sometimes temporary & healable? yes.

i myself literally am the living proof of that.

is dysphoria in other cases a lifelong thing?

absolutely.

there's many folks who lived entire lives being blissfully happy and satisfied after transitioning. i was not one of them, but i can't argue with the truth that transitioning does work out for some folks.

dysphoria isn't some self-inflicted shackles, nor is it always about some systematically enforced shackles. it's a symptom.

not every sneeze is a cold. not every sneeze is a respiratory disease. not every sneeze is from cold weather. not every sneeze is from dust. there's soooooo many factors involved here with gender dysphoria... you can't just assume someone's entire life and worldview.

[teashoesandhair]

OK lads but. Why is the r slur coming back. It's 2026. Why am I hearing so many of The Youth use this word liberally and at whim. Do you need me to ground you. Do I need to sit you on the naughty step. Do you need me to strap you into the Learning Chair and deliver a 4 hour lecture about the history of the r slur, ableism, and why using that word is neither big nor cool. Or do you just need me to punch you in the mouth.

[tirfpikachu]

i'm gonna go through my drafts and show some of them here, btw. this will be very low quality and messy and experimental. i will suffer through this immensely but it must be done

[tirfpikachu]

love them... need to make a picmix yuri of them

[tirfpikachu]

ENOUGH. bring me my toxic yuri chalice

[tirfpikachu]

hiiii 👋 hello. nyello. update time

i'm still working on my video series and i have a little femslash/yuri podcast in the works as a side snack with a very darling co-host. i make semi-private livestreams on my youtube channel & have a twitch.

i might at times be less active here. if that's the case, i'll try my best to update my ko-fi, substack, or at least my stupid twitter @ nuancefem.

Support Miss Nuancefem

Support Miss Nuancefem

Miss Nuancefem | Substack

Salut mes amies 👋 My name is Lay and I'm a nuancefem! I spend all my free time trying to build bridges between feminist and LGBTQ communitie

i took down the only vid i ever made on that yt channel btw since i'll be using some of it as raw footage but tysm to those who commented! y'all have been so sweet, especially in the discord server TwT mwah

this sideblog still feels so stiff i need to decrinkle it

probably with picmixes. (my condolences in advance.)

[tirfpikachu]

what if we were all bunnies and we were nice

WHAT IF WE WERE ALL BUNNIES AND WE WERE NICE