The Roach Files

[tommytheroach]

It may seem im doing crowd work but im actually talkin to this load bearing beam about a thankless job of keeping a roof over our heads. #cottonmouthcomedytour #crowdworking #standupcomedy #sandiego 6/20 #smokefilledmemories #latenight #NIGHTLIFESD

[tommytheroach]

Behold, roasted #pork loin.

[tommytheroach]

Luck Defined By T. Lucero

Luck isn't finding the bathroom in time, luck is not finding someone living in it and that there's still toilet paper. Some people enjoy testing the boundaries of their own good fortune be it in front of a card table in Vegas or by having a significant other with that look in their eye like the engines running, but there's obviously no one driving. I feel that with age comes experience and the knowledge that you can't always get what you want, but if you try sometimes you might find you should just buy a lot more weed.

People mistake luck as the guy who wins some money on a power ball ticket but the real luck is with the guy who wins the genetic lottery and has health care his entire life. We all make the mistake of thinking those that seem to have a good streak of luck are just showing what's on the surface, we aren't privy to the information behind the scenes like if they have one leg shorter than the other or a crippling addiction to Clown Porn. Nonetheless, life is what you make it and you especially make your own luck by your own choices , like whether or not you should eat that sushi at the gas station because I'd bet that would make your luck go right into the shitter .

After enough time most people learn from their mistakes and their luck changes enough where they'd seem like a fortunate or, in some cases, even smarter to the average person. In all truth its more like people don't appreciate what they have, one persons being late for work in a more extreme situation is another person's I just found out my girlfriends pregnant and now my dad is essentially having his own grand child.

[tommytheroach]

A Dogs Life

The life of man’s best friend has been widely debated as being just as easy as it is difficult in quite a few respects. The saying "It’s a dog’s life" has been thrown around for years, but is it something that should be envied? There's multiple aspects that could garner jealousy sure, such as the lack of disdain if your master smells more like one of your peers as opposed to the latter or the whole ability to lick yourself. One could say that it's a life of blissful ignorance in many cases as well. Take the lives of the various "first pets", they never care about things like approval ratings or how many prostitutes are in the oval office at any given time. Like a good pet they only live to make their masters happy, which has its draw backs as i feel that if there'd been an absence of a dog the noble pretzel would've claimed at least one president. I’d like to think those waning Reagan years where Ronnie was having conversations with his pooch that pup felt just as his name suggested, Lucky.

I’m just as much of a dog person as i am a cat person though, however it’s for a far different reason. Cats are the most independent and capable of adapting to bullshit yet somehow domesticated animals. Which in a way makes me also relate with them to a certain degree. Cats are the kind of animal that if there's something wrong they not only find a way to evade the situation but they also find a safe vantage from where they can look on and judge, at least that's what mine does when he watches me realize there's no toilet paper after the fact. Cats are the only animals that will accidentally smother you because they love you so much by actually laying on your face while you slept, well that's what my brother used to tell me when I would wake up to him smothering me with Mr Whiskers. Cats are like that relative that came to visit and never left but you never ask them about it because you're not sure if they're feral or they ate that acid you thought you lost last week.

[tommytheroach]

#chocolateapple #harrahssocal #foodie #foodporn #foodpornography

[tommytheroach]

In 2 days! 21+. Free show! The next Comedy Night At The Salty Frog show that I'm running will be on Saturday, December 16 and it's going to be a triple feature show with James Schrader, Chet Sewell, and Tommy Lucero! Also on the lineup are Dan Marganski, Matt Byrd, and Alex Peregrina! I'll be bringing some of the funniest comics that San Diego has to offer and do my best to bring in outside talent as well! Please come out to support live comedy and live music at the Salty Frog because I want to grow this room to be one of the highlights of the San Diego comedy scene! Great drink prices and great selection, including rotating craft beers! Thanks for your support and see you every 3rd Saturday of the month at the Salty Frog! (at The Salty Frog)

[tommytheroach]

#westernbaconcheeseburger #lunch #delicioso #imadethis #foodporn #foodography #foodpornography #baconwhore (at University of San Diego)

[tommytheroach]

#sandiego #standupcomedy #california #lifecoach #funnightout #latenight #nightlife #popupcomedy #friends #avengersassemble #619209comedy (at The Comedy Store (La Jolla))

[tommytheroach]

The most auspicious headliner for 40 Oz to Funny Comedy at The Comedy Store (La Jolla) is the man with more credits than you can shake a baby at! Roast Battle , The Mean Boys Podcast , AND Burn Booth just to name a few. So, it’s safe to say he’s well on his way to being a household name. Make those reservations while there’s still room so you can share in an evening that will be one for the books. (at The Comedy Store (La Jolla))

[tommytheroach]

We are lucky to have MAMA Award Winner (Modesto Area Music Award) @jimmie dave Menezes to the line up as our special guest . He’s a face that can be found on the tour circuit from SoCal to NorCal and everywhere in between! He’s someone who’s comedy is second to none and often imitated but NEVER DUPLICATED . Hes just one of many that’ll be making ‘em laugh til all drink well beyond the minimum and tell all their friends at work the next day . Call The Comedy Store (La Jolla) for reservations and tickets for December 28th, see ya then!!!! (at The Comedy Store (La Jolla))

[tommytheroach]

#blackandwhitechallenge #flag #america #blackandwhiteonly #starsandstripesforever 🇺🇸 (at North Park, San Diego)

[tommytheroach]

#foodporn #foodstagram #instayum #burgersoftheworld #bacon #swss #grilledonions #thousandisland #thiswillbegonebythetimeyouseethispicture #lunchbreak (at University of San Diego)

[tommytheroach]

#blackandwhitechallenge day 4 #guttermouthofficial #makingfriends @guttermouthofficial (at Brick By Brick)

[tommytheroach]

@guttermouthofficial still puts on a great show, thanks @brickbybricksd ❤️ (at Brick By Brick)

[tommytheroach]

#blackandwhitechallenge day3 #dogstagram #dogsofinstagram #GiaDog

[tommytheroach]

Day3 #blackandwhitephotography #blackandwhite #blackandwhitechallenge

[tommytheroach]

Day 2 #blackandwhitechallenge #7daysofblackandwhite #puppyfriend #mrpuppy (at Old Town San Diego State Historic Park)