[cyanocittae]

my friend keeps sending the groupchat voice notes of her eating bussy and calling it "asmr"..... bro go study for your physics exam 😭

[cyanocittae]

hi sorry uh. incredible miscommunication on my part lmfao.

my bad yall

[jellyfishforest135]

Rest in peace Sam Neill. Thank you for the awe and wonder you brought to us.

[thethoriumreactor]

So I had an idea and it’s a hitman!Simon x teacher!Grace au

Think:

Normal modern au without an end-of-the-world scenario

Simon is a hitman (unfortunately well-known as the “Butcher”) who doesn’t like his job and barely scrapes by, grew up in a cult and doesn’t know affection

Grace is a middle school teacher after failing in academia, basically a big cuddly golden retriever with self-esteem issues

Human Rockdrian, maybe the COI as an organisation

plenty of hurt/comfort, yearning, cuddles and shenanigans

am I cooking something or what

[pocket-dragon]

tbf ilyukhina has a photocard for all the ground team

[jusjuiceboxbox]

Welcome to being an adult! Featuring such injury causing events as

- sneezed wrong

- turned your neck a little too fast

- slept weird

- took the trash out to the curb and stepped at a slightly different angle than usual

- breathed

- failed to breathe properly

- breathed in the wrong stuff. Allergy time

- looked too hard at something too far away

- knees

[prismaprimrose]

Image if Grace did the "OKAY MY HAND IS UP🙋🏼"

But to the room full of world leaders bombarding him with Astorphage breeding questions when he arrived at the Vat. Like he JUST got there and he's dizzy and sick and they were all shouting and muscle memory just kicked in, you gotta believe him, he wasn't even thinking.

They'd all be so shocked it would work though.

He'd have .001 second to panic, like did he really just do that, and then its either control or loose control of the room just like any middle school class.

He'd still have his hand up like "Okay. Who wants to go first."

And Eva would watch like three people actually, legitimately, raise their hands and wait to be called.

She'd be like I shoulda kidnapped this guy sooner lmao what

[gem-st4r]

so anyway yeah iron lung and project hail mary both very good

[pineappical]

cuteness aggression

[paper-mache-stars]

been thinking about grace and adrian being alike

[ahhhdownwego]

How do you sleep at night?

[coleslawwwww]

Simon’s not used to the supervised sleep yet

[blueumbriel]

Choose your fighter looking ahhh

[silvaerial]

Patron Saints of One-Way Trips

[mellosdrawings]

Yurifies your trolley problem <3

[tredlocity]

red dead and beyond

[tredlocity]

bed bath redemption

[wavezies]

big fan of strattland being a little too comfortable in each others' space and weirding everyone else out completely straight-faced

[alleysap]

in which simon singlehandedly salvages a social interaction (full page under cut)