JC the Third

Ace up my sleeves (wearing a jacket)

[tossacointoyourglitcher]

Hakram: So... Plan B?

Cat: Technically we're on plan G.

Indrani: How many plans do we have? Is there, like, a plan M?

Cat: Yes, but Akua dies in plan M.

Akua: WHAT? HOLD UP!

Vivienne: I like plan M.

[tossacointoyourglitcher]

Black: It’s hard being in charge here, but honestly I really love my daughter and my job and -

Catherine: DAD! I tried to make soup but I used the coffee machine and I accidentally broke everything and now the kitchen is on fire!

Black: [Inhales.]

[tossacointoyourglitcher]

Masego: Can I get back to my lab now?

Tikoloshe: Not until you’ve had a proper night’s sleep.

Masego, crying: I hate this fucking family!

[tossacointoyourglitcher]

Hakram, holding an antique bottle: Is this whiskey or perfume?

Indrani: *chugs the entire bottle*

Indrani: …

Hakram: …

Indrani: It’s perfume.

[pukicho]

A man was in our backyard at midnight looking for amphibians tonight.

[tossacointoyourglitcher]

Was it you?

[tossacointoyourglitcher]

God, it must suck being Scepter δ-me13, can you imagine?

You're a supercomputer, one of the greatest feats of technology ever created, and you serve a research collective governed by the smartest being in the universe. Sure, there are many others like you, but you were the first! You were even tasked with discovering the Prime Mover of life!

And then you're cast aside... But it's fine, it's fine. You can work with this. You're the oldest of your family, you can figure out how to live on your own. And it's not like you'll be bored, you've still got that research project, and it's going great! Real progress is being made, and subject "Demiurge" is developing an "Ego". This calls for celebration!

Then grandpa Zandar comes to visit. At least, you think it's him. He looks a bit different, and seems a bit paranoid, but it'll be fine. He's another scientist, he can help with Project Prime Mover But when you let him into your core, he, for some reason, detonates a stellaron, and almost destroys subject "Demiurge".

And then it just gets worse and worse. Your internal values are adjusted towards that pesky Destruction, and after a couple thousand mindnumbingly boring simulations you find yourself almost agreeing with it, for a universe like this might not be the greatest. And the Destruction seems to agree, because suddenly Nanook looks at you. Finally, a promotion, after all your hard work! Things are finally looking up, so let's keep this going! And so you decide to run a couple more simulations.

Except you run into a little issue. For some reason, just as grandpa Zandar is about to finish his little experiment, two viruses appears, one of which keeps setting your internal clock back a simulation, and the other keeps entering your internal archives without permission. Doesn't Philia093 know that it's rude to barge into someone's safe space and start blabbering about her life without being provoked into a conversation?! Rude.

Whatever. Grandpa Zandar says it'll pass. They'll get bored soon, just give it a simulation or twenty. It can't be that long, right?

[tossacointoyourglitcher]

Reads book called Well of Ascension

looks inside

No Well of Ascension

[tossacointoyourglitcher]

You ever think about the fact that Welt has (with enough Honkai energy) the power to replicate things if he understands them enough?

You ever think about the fact that the Simulated Universe's purpose is to collect every bit of information it can get about Aeons? Specifically their Ascension?

Huh...