king of shadows ; king of shades

I mean, my papa was never the most selfless guy. I know he wished he hadn’t let me go through that portal an au portrayal of neal cassidy / baelfire by # brontide ! (21+) filters by sladestrokes.

[tradedforpower]

I’M NOT A BOY ANYMORE, FELIX ; AND I SURE AS HELL AIN’T LOST ! 

an au portrayal of neal cassidy, penned by # brontide ! 

filter credits to 616frost / sladestrokes, psd credits to polarizerps.

[tradedforpower]

ooc ;; replies to come tomorrow. I’ve slept most of today and was absolutely pooped yesterday.

[tradedforpower]

"King of shadows? You look pretty solid to me"

" what? oh, well, that's not exactly ... what that means. "

[tradedforpower]

minaharkerdailymirror​:

Mina sensed his discomfort and pulled back as well, apologetically, “Most things are.”

What she wouldn’t sometimes give to be naive enough  to believe things were black and white again. But those days were long past. 

the shift was appreciated, and the man moved further away to prevent further unwanted touching. “ so it seems, yeah. “  things were never black and white, he had learned that quite young, and things were never as they seemed.

[tradedforpower]

justmilah​:

It was an unusual feeling. Her heart, or whatever was there now, swelled when he called her ‘mama’ while also plummeting at everything else. “He…” There was a lot to process there. “I would have given him the bean if…” She trailed off. Would she have? Or would she have used it herself to find him?

‘Because of me.’ His words brought back old wounds. ‘Do it for Bae. For Bae. Stay for Bae.’ Words always used to deflate her arguments because she would have done anything ‘for Bae’ and Rumple had known that. Then the point came where leaving was the best she could offer him, because if she hadn’t he would have spent his childhood chasing his bitter mother down to the tavern and pull her out of the mug, she had seen it when he’d come in that day.  As the years passed she wondered if that had all been an excuse. “None of it was your fault, Baelfire.” He probably already knew, but she wanted to be sure. “Whatever your father did or chose to do, certainly not my leaving. None of it was because of anything you did.” Even when they told themselves it was for Baelfire, in the end those were just excuses.

Then she learned that she didn’t have a heart after all because if she did she would have died all over again from a heart attack. “Killian was in Neverland? You were in Neverland?” She swallowed a few times. “He told me he’d never go back–” Her mind decided to settle then on the worst part of it. She’d heard stories, some from her captain and some elsewhere, and if the truth was only a fraction of it it was far worse than anything she’d ever wish for him. “A lost boy…” An instinct she hadn’t used in decades overwhelmed her and she did what she would do when he came home after a fight or when someone had been mean to him, or when he’d wake up from a nightmare. Her arms were around him before she could even think about it, fingers sifting through his hair as she tried to protect him from something that happened decades ago.

“ he wouldn’t let you know what his plans were, thinks it makes him weak. there’s a lot of things he kept hidden until it was too late ; he told me you were ... already dead, said you died after you left. “  a sigh, he knew his mother wouldn’t withhold her son his freedom, nor would she ever leave him an orphan on the streets. but, in a way, he was okay with his father not coming to get him, it was the memory of wendy that kept him going thus far. 

bae knew nothing of those arguments, nor did he know anything of the excuses or reasoning that had been given for her to stay. the portrait of his mother in his mind was hardly accurate, and it was shifting by the very second. she left him, she abandoned him, a ship was more important, and then, she was getting ready to give him a new life, she was protecting him, she was allowing him a cowardly father that cared without considering the darkness he may turn into. “ it all is, though. he became that thing because of me, because of that damn ogre war, “ he let out a bitter laugh, “ I suppose what’s become of me has been earned. “

she really did know nothing of his story, and how could she ? all of his tragedy came after her, after their family was nearly ripped apart the first time. “ yeah, I-- I ended up there trying to save my, “ he paused, unsure of what to call them. his mother was family, his father used to be, and neither of them knew the intense love he received in another world, “ my family. the one’s that took me in after I lost papa. “ the hug had caught him off guard, frown deepening, but the only resistance that came was a flinch. he didn’t pull away, but rather, buried himself in her embrace, much like he had as a young lad. “ nearly a century. “

[tradedforpower]

justmilah​:

Her heart sank along with her shoulders and her fingers were brushing against his cheek before she could stop them. Quickly she pulled her hand back, crossing her arms tightly against herself so they’d behave. “So you know about it.” Her jaws clenched as nails dug into her arms. How could he expose their child to that? “He was upset because I’d told him I never loved him.”

It killed her that she didn’t know what his expressions meant anymore. Was he feeling sorrow? Guilt? Indigestion? “Of course you didn’t, darling. How–What do you have to do with them?”

Her eyebrows furrowed as her expression shifted to one of confusion. Milah tilted her head slightly to one side as she leaned closer to him, arms still trapped by her hands. “You and he…are the only people who have truly loved me. You are the only two I truly love. All plans I made to come back for you were made with him.” There was a sinking feeling in her chest. “What happened?”

“ I more than know about it, yeah, “ he said with a nod, a gentle sigh leaving him. despite her attempts at not touching him, he did feel the ghost of her fingers and surprisingly did not pull away. this was complex, and he couldn’t believe he was so angry at her. “ he was getting the bean because of me, mama. to get back to me. “

the situation made him angry, the memory of being sent through that portal and appearing on the other side alone left him full of rage ; he had been alone every day since, and he couldn’t breathe when faced with those he used to call family. “ he … I tried to undo his power, and he chose it over me. I wouldn’t be surprised if he regretted his decision. “

when she leaned towards him, he didn’t move. not closer, not further away. bae would tell her anything she wished to know, and wouldn’t hesitate. while she left, she was not to blame for his fathers decisions, or for hook’s. “ pan didn’t like pirates keeping his lost boys. “

[tradedforpower]

justmilah​:

@tradedforpower​ continued from here

Milah blinked in surprise. Somehow, the idea that he hadn’t known of her fate had not crossed her mind. Of course, it was something she herself had known about since it had happened, so it was probably because she was just so used to the fact that it had become a bit obvious to her. (And his hair was perhaps as curly as her own and this absolutely thrilled her.) Her eyebrows lifted and she tilted her head at someone invading to claim treasure. That was almost the way it was. Her eyes narrowed as she tried to figure out how to tell him. 

Milah cleared her throat. How should she phrase this? ‘Your bastard of a father killed me for not loving him’ probably wouldn’t go over well, especially considering how close they’d been before she moved. “Among not liking some of the things I said, the Dark One wanted a magic bean that I refused to hand over.”

Then she realized that something she had dreamed about for years before her death had apparently happened and it caught her off guard. After a moment she smiled brightly. “You’ve been on my ship?”

 at the mention of the dark one being responsible, anger evaporated into one matching a deeper sullen exterior. eyebrows fell, as did his frown, and the man nodded once. it didn’t seem so out of character for the dark one, the very man he used to call ‘papa’, to be the one that brought death and destruction ; but, the question remained -- why would he still care about the wife who left them when he, in fact, abandoned his son the very same way? milah had left him, but she didn’t leave him alone. rumplestiltskin did, and he hated that the anger he held for the snakeskin man burned far brighter than that he held for his mother.

he had truly no idea what had happened to her after she left, other than the fact that she had passed along to somewhere else by the time he made it onto the jolly roger. death was possible and he knew that, but it never crossed his mind ; hook abandoning his mother for a new woman, desperate for escape, had a few times, however. “ papa did this? “ was all he could manage to say, words dying on his tongue quicker than they could escape it. then, he recognized the motivations.

it had nothing to do with her, or even with what remained of their family, but, instead, attempts to get to the land without magic. his heart, unmoving in his chest, fell at the thought of somehow being responsible. “ I know of what those beans do, but ... I never wanted someone to die in order for him to get one. “

at the change in her exterior, the smile that he remembered vaguely, confusion sunk in. “ yes, I’ve met your pirate. real piece of work that one, eh? “

[tradedforpower]

"King of shadows? You look pretty solid to me"

" what? oh, well, that's not exactly ... what that means. "

[tradedforpower]

minaharkerdailymirror​:

“Hm” Mina went to tap his leg a couple of times with her foot to verify that yes, he was a solid person in front of her, “Well what DOES it mean?”

he shifted back, frown deeply setting into his roughened features ; the thought of being touched, by a stranger no less, irked him. “ it’s rather complex, you see. “

[tradedforpower]

"King of shadows? You look pretty solid to me"

" what? oh, well, that's not exactly ... what that means. "

[tradedforpower]

“ tell me how i can fix this… ”

emotionally intense prompts // open ! // @justmilah

" well, you have got to be joking, " he said with a scoff, nostrils flaring slightly as anger pulsed through him. bae had made his peace many years ago with the fact that his mother had abandoned him entirely, and he knew better than to trust anyone who claimed to care ; family has long since been forgotten, ever since he left the darling's about a century prior, and he had no space in his dead heart for false apologies. " how the hell do you expect this to be alright ? this is beyond fixing, mother ; what, have you grown bored enough now that your beloved pirate has found someone new ? "

[tradedforpower]

justmilah​:

She sighed. Assessed the situation, let him lead. No begging, no pleading. She knew that holding on too tight, ignoring what he needed, would only guarantee he run. It’s why she had run from his father. Killian was perhaps the thing she shouldn’t address, but it was the easier. “I’ve been dead for decades, darling. I wish he’d moved on sooner.” Her pirate was still beloved to her, of course, and she wished she hadn’t died as soon as she had. Of course, had she survived the wrath of her estranged husband, this conversation certainly would have happened much sooner. “It will never be alright. Should I have taken you with me, then? Not wait until you were older? A small boy on a pirate ship with so many things to hurt him, with no grass beneath his feet.” None of her regrets were around her leaving. She would always choose to leave, over and over again. Any other way would have seen her leaving him in other ways with an even smaller chance of returning to him. “I should have, I think. By the time you were old enough, I was a bit murdered.”

he paused in his fuming at the mention of murder, the man taking several steps backwards. disbelief covered his features, his head shaking quickly, resulting in curls flying wildly out of place. “ murdered? who-- someone on the ship grow frustrated? someone invade and try to claim treasure? “ bae hated the thought of someone coming for his mother ; even with all of her faults, he never desired danger to come her way, nor did he wish to see her here so young. she had sought freedom, a future where her coward husband could not taint the path ahead, and yet, she perished. “ by the time i was old enough, i ... was not there. hook ,he ... jesus, that explains a lot. “ the laugh was killed immediately on his tongue, the bitter sound never daring to escape his lips. “ of course you were already dead by the time i got on board. “

[tradedforpower]

“ do you truly believe that anything so little as a rule, or a law, might have stopped me from protecting you? “ (from Emma)

emotionally intense prompts // open ! // @rawbutprecious (emma)

" well, you see, it would most, yes ; most would not stop to help a complete stranger and risk their freedom, " he said carefully, awkwardly shifting his weight from each leg. the protection, while not required, was appreciated and he would be quick to repay her debt ; it would be an honourable thing to do. " thank you for the help, miss ... ? " neal paused, seeking an introduction.

[tradedforpower]

“ tell me how i can fix this… ”

emotionally intense prompts // open ! // @justmilah

" well, you have got to be joking, " he said with a scoff, nostrils flaring slightly as anger pulsed through him. bae had made his peace many years ago with the fact that his mother had abandoned him entirely, and he knew better than to trust anyone who claimed to care ; family has long since been forgotten, ever since he left the darling's about a century prior, and he had no space in his dead heart for false apologies. " how the hell do you expect this to be alright ? this is beyond fixing, mother ; what, have you grown bored enough now that your beloved pirate has found someone new ? "

[soulprompts]

emotionally intense prompts.

idk my dudes i started listening to the etern.als theme music and now i have these things. bon appetit!

“ i’d follow you to the ends of the universe, if you asked me to. ”

“ how bad is it this time? ”

“ we’re the only thing standing between this world and its destruction. ”

“ we could stop all of this… with just a thought/flick of my wrist. “

“ fair?! how is any of this fair?! “

“ do you truly believe that anything so little as a rule, or a law, might have stopped me from protecting you? “

“ we have to fight. ”

“ we’re not giving up. ”

“ you. i’ll always and endlessly fight for you. “

“ i can wait a thousand lifetimes for you. “

“ we’ve had a pretty good life. but maybe normalcy is a thing we’re meant to protect, rather than enjoy. ”

“ i don’t know if i can protect you any longer. “

“ we’ve seen what they’re capable of. now we need to retaliate. “

“ if only the world knew what we do for them… ”

“ i’m sick and tired of being the one who has to make the sacrifices! ”

“ haven’t we lost enough? ”

“ i’m tired. beyond tired… i am exhausted from the endless fighting. ”

“ things must be catastrophic if you’re calling me at this hour. ”

“ this is what we’ve been waiting for. ”

“ i’d follow you to the bitter end; as i always have. ”

“ the time has come. ”

“ this is what we’ve been waiting for. ”

“ i thought we had more time.  i regret to confess… it appears that i was wrong. ”

“ don’t let them control you, eh? ”

“ you’re better than this. ”

“ everything’s about to change… ”

“ do you truly think so little of me? ”

“ careful… you’ve never had to fight me before. ”

“ we need to leave. ”

“ we’re a good team, you know. “

“ look around you. do you still truly see no reason for us to fight? “

“ we’re family. we don’t turn our backs on each other. “

“ it’s too late! let’s go! ”

“ it wasn’t your fault… ”

“ why are you doing this?! ”

“ i’m sorry… “

“ perhaps i don’t say it enough, but… i’d like you to know that i’m always here, if you ever wanted to talk. ”

“ you/they will always be worth fighting for. ”

“ don’t pretend like you understand. “

“ tell me how i can fix this… ”

“ don’t say it. ”

“ they’re not worth saving. ”

“ i am a god. you… you’re nothing. “

“ well. for whatever it’s worth, it’s been a pleasure fighting alongside you. ”

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