Something I’ve noticed as someone reconnecting to their Jewish ancestry (I always knew I had Jewish ancestry, but was not raised connected to it or any of my other culture, we were a heavily assimilated family) is that Jewish ppl are not really allowed to just be ‘normal’ once people know we are Jewish/Jewish descendant. Like the minute someone finds out I have Jewish ancestry I am suddenly not a person anymore, but just a Jew.
And I’m not saying Jewish people aren’t people, but in my experience it has felt like my personhood is taken away the minute someone finds out about my Jewish ancestry. I am no longer allowed to be anything other than this projection/caricature of what people think Jewish people are/are like or I am constantly experiencing people ‘testing’ me on whether or not I’m a Zionist (bc I guess the value of a Jew is determined by whether or not they have ‘good’ politics).
It’s happened even with my own (ex) friends, they constantly brought up Israel and Zionism after finding out I was Jewish descent even though they have never once spoken of or cared about the I/P conflict beforehand, and would only bring it up in response to me mentioning anything relating to Jewishness… It’s just a weird thing I’ve noticed that I’m sure many others already realized but I guess I’ve just been blind to it for so long due to me being disconnected. But now that I’ve been openly reconnecting for about 1 1/2 years I’ve noticed it much more and it’s just so annoying.
Thank you so much for your ask.
Mazel tov on reconnecting, it's great to see someone appreciating their Judaism.
Unfortunately your experience is very common. Centuries before there was the modern state of Israel, Jews have faced persecution, discrimination, and massacres over the accusation of dual loyalty. This dual loyalty accusation was not always exclusive to Israel, at times it was levied against us for being more loyal to other Jews or to our religion than our host nation.
I have two jobs, one as a researcher of antisemitism and another as a bartender. I have been open about my judaism at work and always wear my magen David earrings and necklace. This has opened me up to receiving many antisemitic comments on almost a daily basis from customers and coworkers. Mostly, it is people asking me about if I support Israel or not. I have never seemed to be able to answer this question the "right way" — the conversation ends awkwardly after I give my answer, or they press me "But what about [insert complete disinformation they got from Twitter]? What do you have to say about that?" They obviously don't really want an answer, what they want to hear is a firm denouncing and further demonization from me.
I wish I could say that in my research I see a decrease in antisemitism, but after a decade we have tracked a high spike in the last two years. It appears to only be getting worse.
It is a difficult time to reconnect with the tribe, but it's never a bad time. As you have experienced, and as our ancestors have experienced, even one drop of Jewish blood makes you appear as a threat. Regardless of whether or not you reconnected, you would be "othered" and persecuted with the rest of us. Reconnecting, at the very least, means you can also experience the joys of Judaism, rather than just the hardships.
That is what Pesach is all about — we remember the suffering we have endured so that we may appreciate the joy when we see it.
Next year in Jerusalem. Chag sameach.
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