I replayed King’s Quest VII and the romance arc in it is making me crazy x_x like:
Troll King: *kidnaps Rosella* we will have the most beautiful wedding :)
Rosella: no!!!
Troll King: ...okay :(
and then it turns out he’s not the real Troll King, he's an impostor who’s been mind-controlled by an evil enchantress, so Rosella goes on a whole quest to find the real Troll King
but as soon as she finds him, the evil enchantress shoves them in a coffin and buries them alive
Malicia: I hope you two get along, since you’re going spend the next thousand years together~
so in the next scene Rosella and the real Troll King have known each other for ten seconds, they're trying (and failing) to stay out of each other's personal space, a ghoul is trying to break in, and if they don't cooperate perfectly they both die
and I’m just sitting there like please let the thousand years thing be a prophecy, this is the best meet-cute i've ever seen, i love them already
and that's not the end! that's the beginning! later on:
she hides him from the enchantress by turning him into a beetle and keeping him in her pocket
"There, now. Everyone will think you're the Lady Tsepish. You look downright scary, my dear." -Troll King's response to Rosella's disguise (this is possibly the most romantic thing a man can say about a woman's outfit?)
he intercepts a magical lightning bolt to protect her and collapses unconscious in the control room for an erupting volcano
she revives him and he immediately stops the volcano from erupting
and then they just look at each other and start laughing in relief, and they don't have to say anything, they're just emotionally synced x_x
AND THEN (this is the part that makes me crazy), the game goes "And then the fake Troll King turns out to be some fairy prince Rosella met in a previous game, he kidnapped her because he's been in love with her all this time, she's totally rescued him, they're dating now!"
like OK, it's fairytale logic with inverted gender roles, very cute for 1994, but WHY WHY WHY did Sierra feel the need to write in a whole second royal bachelor who is FUNNY and SUPPORTIVE and BRAVE and GOES THROUGH PERIL AND SAVES THE WORLD WITH ROSELLA, and then go "haha just kidding! of course she doesn't marry the troll" WHY