alight to parts unknown!

all i can say is have fun in the grey (and use but one blog to post on every interest you have x) (she/her)

[twodoorsnotone]

I want to do something fun on weekday nights until I die

[twodoorsnotone]

I hate when recipes are like "simple quick recipe!" And it involves like 5 billion steps and takes an hour

[hotvampireadjacent]

https://twitter.com/birdtickler/status/1552657242909904897?s=21&t=q4JEDIALmV-cAjcoEOypdw

[littlemisspipebomb]

ok so I looked it up, and it turns out they made a track out of PVC pipes, down a hill. The owner didn't realise PVC expanded in the heat, so on a turn the track just fell apart and the dude inside went over a fucking free way and into a swamp.

[aspiringwarriorlibrarian]

The funniest part is that the inspector was watching the whole time, and once the ball stopped he left without saying anything. Park management just shut it down then and there.

[baronfulmen]

"The ball cleared a small hill, briefly going airborne, then zipped right across Route 94, the two-lane road splitting the park. Cars honked and slammed on their brakes. If there had been opposing traffic, Frank would have become part of a real-life game of Pong, volleying from one bumper to another.

Still in pursuit, we followed the ball toward a small lake in Motor World that had been earmarked for a fleet of tiny bumper boats for children. The area wasn’t open yet, but the empty boats were being tested and floated on the surface. The ball soared over the grass and smashed into several of them, scattering the others with rippling waves from the impact, which launched some of the boats several feet in the air.

Charlie and Ken waded into the water looking for the hatch. After some difficulty, they got it open. Charlie pulled Frank out by grabbing him under his armpits like a baby. Frank crawled up the bank, coughing and sputtering. He splayed across the grass as we all stared at the ball, which bobbed in the water like it was attached to a fishing lure.

We did not ask for the inspector’s report, nor did we ever hear of one being filed. Ken Bailey returned to Canada. The snow-makers cleared away the PVC. Told to dispose of the Bailey Ball, they rolled it into the woods, where it remained for many years."

I don't know that this beats the teeth story, but it's pretty great.

[louisegluckpdf]

i think every publisher should have to institute a ban on books that fail what i’m calling the “little life” and “what else?” tests

[louisegluckpdf]

for reference.

[ficauthor]

Psych is such a weird show bc in a lot of ways it's constantly asking, "can you forgive your father? even tho he could never forgive you, can you forgive him?" and the thing he could never forgive you for was not meeting his exact very specific expectations. And the answer keeps being yes you can, because not doing so is worse. You tried and it hurt more. You tried and it made you more miserable. You forgive him because he's all you have most of the time, and its somehow less complicated than whatever you have going on with your mom. You can forgive him but you can't forget, and then one day he realizes that he was wrong and there was nothing he should have taken as a slight about you, but you both just never acknowledge this paradigm shift in your relationship bc it'd be more awkward then fighting again for the millionth time. So things get better but you never say why, you never acknowledge it unless forced and somehow you forgive him more than your mom who you were never even half as mad at.

But also it's about breaking and entering into sea world and making a janitor think you killed your best friend so you can escape, it's about gaslighting your coworkers into thinking you are the dumbest man alive, it's about only closing a mystery when it's as funnt as possible and making sure everyone else around you is as baffled as possible. It's about childhood and nostalgia and growing up in the most chaotic way you can. It's about people being killed with a t-rex skull, it's about slapstick and committing to the bit and being the silliest messiest bisexual on tv in 2006-2014.

It's about a son and his father and forgiveness and somehow also they are in a circus tent trying to find out why a corpse was launched from a cannon. And also there's an extended musical episode that makes it onto my personal Spotify year after year

[dogpuppy]

[twodoorsnotone]

@femalepope <3

[twodoorsnotone]

The funniest part about reading Percy Jackson as an adult was seeing Annabeth be like WHY DOES NO ONE GIVE ME A QUEST EVEN THOUGH IM REALLY GOOD AT THIS IT'S NOT FAIR >:( and I'm there like because you're twelve babe

[twodoorsnotone]

OMFG I fucking hate final draft this shitty ass software. Nothing I have ever used in my life has ever crashed as often and consistently as FD. It's the worst to be in the flow and then i not only lose my progress but can't even rewrite what i lost while it's fresh because every time I launch it it keeps crashing when I try to type and just wont restore itself for several hours. Plus it only works at all on my laptop in like potato level graphics lmfao.

[adaptationsdaily]

LITTLE WOMEN dir. Greta Gerwig (2019)

[sr-roto]

audio On 😂😂😂

[theygender]

For blind/visually impaired folks: The instruments being used to recreate these songs are two kazoos, a plastic shopping bag, a metal colander pot, a basting brush, an empty water jug, and a thin sheet of plastic, all being played by two people in an empty parking garage for the acoustics

For deaf/HoH folks: The songs being played here are near perfect renditions of the 20th Century Fox theme, the Pirates of the Caribbean theme, and the Mission Impossible theme

[interestingmistakes]

I can't get over how he just grabs her head and shakes while she plays kazoo to make the opening trill to the mission impossible theme

[twodoorsnotone]

Alice Osman backing TGWDLM:R oh she's real as hell for that

[watchoutpaul-hemightkickyourhead]

[starleska]

might i add

[twodoorsnotone]

anyone else think the cure by Olivia Rodrigo is gay as hell

[twodoorsnotone]

My head ACHESSSSSSSSS

[twodoorsnotone]

i love slowly infecting all my friends with bg3. it's almost like i am spreading a tadpole into their eyes that will turn them into a mind flayer

[twodoorsnotone]

ughhh wdym to reduce my cortisol levels i need to do regular exercise sleep better eat better meditate have a more positive mental attitude and generally fix my life.... where's the magic pill....

[weaver-z]

I think that the Hamilton musical is objectively the funniest thing that could happen to that man's memory. Imagine dying of a gunshot wound infection in 1804 and learning from the afterlife that tweenage girls in 2017 are drawing thousands upon thousands of images of you making out with your fellow congressmen because someone wrote a 2-hour rap opera about you. I like to imagine that Hamilton found a monkey's paw and wished to leave a legacy, and this is what it did to him.

[happiebirdie]

you don't control who lives who dies who tells your story