Teen Wolf prompts I'll never write.

Fan of Teen Wolf. In love with Tyler Hoechlin. Also in love with Tyler Posey's bottom. Mostly Sterek, Scerek, and some other minor ships.

[twpromptsillneverwrite]

Sometimes self-care is going to the "Derek Hale has a big dick" tag.

[twpromptsillneverwrite]

Derek: Why did you insist on having a mirror behind me while we were doing it?

Stiles: From my angle I can't see it bounce.

Derek: See what bounce?

Stiles: Do you know why I always stay behind when we go running.

Derek: Because you can't keep up.

Stiles: Yes, but also because I like to see it bounce.

Derek: SEE WHAT BOUNCE!?

[twpromptsillneverwrite]

Stiles: You're insufferable! No one can be this perfect. You must have a weakness.

Derek: I focus too much on the details.

Stiles: What do you think you're doing? This isn't a job interview! We are arguing!

[twpromptsillneverwrite]

Stiles (clinking his glass): I want to make a toast for my dad.

Stiles: Who told me I couldn't be gay dressed like I usually do.

Stiles: Now I'm married to an alpha werewolf with abs for days.

Everyone: *clapping awkwardly*

Stiles: Where's Danny? Danny, remember how I kept asking you if I was attractive to gay guys.

Stiles: Well... Seems like I am attractive to guys with biceps bigger than my head.

Isaac (whispering to Derek): Is this how you imagined your wedding?

Derek: Word for word.

[twpromptsillneverwrite]

Scott: NO! It's my turn.

Stiles: No, it's MY turn.

Lydia: What's all this fuss about?

Scott: We're deciding whose turn is to bottom.

Stiles: And it's my turn!

Lydia: Oh, my god! Can't you guys switch?

Stiles: If you aren't going to take this seriously maybe don't get involved.

Lydia: Gladly!

[twpromptsillneverwrite]

Sheriff (over the phone): I need you to tell me if you're bringing anyone so I can make the reservation.

Stiles: Sure, just give me a moment.

Stiles (turning towards Derek): You know how we are soulmates.

Derek: Soulmates don't exist.

Stiles: Okay, then, since I'm the love of your life...

Derek: I've never claimed that.

Stiles (threateningly): Derek, if you don't propose to me in the next five minutes I'll cut your balls off!

Derek: Stiles, would you do me the honor of being my lovely wife?

Stiles: Of course, I'll be your HUSBAND, you asshole.

Stiles (to the phone): Yes, dad. I'm bringing my fiance.

[twpromptsillneverwrite]

Isaac: Thanks for having me over, I didn't have anywhere else to go.

Stiles: Don't worry, you're always welcome to stay with us. You have my word as the man of the house.

Derek: You're the man of the house, since when?

Stiles: Between you and me, who can take 8 inches of beer can thick dick inside without complaining?

Derek: Okay, you are the man of the house.

Isaac: I should have left when I had the chance.

[twpromptsillneverwrite]

Stiles: I know you don't feel the same, but I like you...

Derek: I like you too.

Stiles: ... And I was hoping that you... YOU LIKE ME?

Derek: You didn't know? We're in the middle of date.

Stiles: I thought it was a strategy meeting.

Derek: I brought flowers.

Stiles: A peace offering.

Derek: I kissed you.

Stiles: I was under the impression that was a common werewolf greeting.

Derek: With tongue?

Stiles: I'm not familiar with all werewolf customs.

[twpromptsillneverwrite]

Stiles: When I say I wanted to top you, I didn't mean like this.

Derek: You're on top.

Stiles: Yes! Riding you!

Derek: You can stop bouncing on it

Stiles: Shut up and let me finish.

[twpromptsillneverwrite]

Derek: Hello, Stiles. I'm so glad you could come meet baby Eli.

Stiles: Thanks for inviting me. Hi, Eli!

Eli: Mama!

Stiles (shocked): What?

Derek: Sorry, Stiles. I don't know why he said that.

*20 minutes earlier*

Isaac: What do we say when we see Stiles?

Eli: Baba!

Everyone: ...

Boyd: This kid's broken.

Erica: Can we get a new one?

Isaac: We are not giving away Derek's baby again.

[twpromptsillneverwrite]

Stiles (suggestively): Is it okay if I take charge this time?

Derek: Sure, babe. Whatever you want.

*2 minutes later*

Stiles: I'm tired, can you take over?

Derek: Sure, babe. Whatever you want.

[twpromptsillneverwrite]

Jackson: I can't help being like this, it's just who I am.

Stiles: Well, when life gives you lemons, shove them up your asshole.

Jackson: That's not what people say.

Stiles: That's genuine advice to you, jerk!

[twpromptsillneverwrite]

Scott: Love is meant to inspire us to be better.

Scott: Somehow love has made you worse.

Stiles (behind some bushes): If you aren't going to help me stalk Derek, you can leave.

Scott: You aren't even being subtle, he came by to say 'hi' ten minutes ago.

Stiles: It's all part of the plan.

[wolffellerblog]

In the loft, a late-night game of compliments spirals out of control when Stiles demands Derek say something he likes about his body. What starts as a simple, awkward observation quickly turns into chaos when Erica turns it suggestive, Isaac and Boyd pile on, and River quietly documents it all. Between teasing, accidental honesty, and growing tension between Stiles and Derek, the pack ends up exposing far more than just opinions on legs and hair. In the end, what looks like nonsense is really just their strange, unspoken way of understanding each other and Derek, despite himself, doesn’t walk away.

Read HERE @twpromptsillneverwrite

[twpromptsillneverwrite]

I'm always happy when I see these fics.

[twpromptsillneverwrite]

Scott: Everyone knows what they need to do. Stiles, you stay here.

Stiles: Right! Little human Stiles can't defend himself.

Scott: Not what I meant...

Stiles: Just cause I'm tiny doesn't mean I can't kick your ass.

Scott: Are you done now?

Stiles: Just cause you kicked my ass earlier doesn't mean I won't kick yours!

[twpromptsillneverwrite]

Stiles: My friend got home with her puppy, and her other dog went and greet the puppy by sniffing its butt.

Derek: What the hell, Stiles?

Stiles: I'm just saying, looks like a valid way to greet someone.

Derek: I'm not sniffing your butt.

Stiles: Not what I was suggesting.

[twpromptsillneverwrite]

Lydia: It's so difficult always being the smartest person in the room.

Stiles: Tell me about it.

Allison: I think she meant...

Stiles: Please, don't.