BUNRING hot take: Radioapple is a toxic ship and you cannot convince me otherwise at all.
Just realised I spelt "Bunring" instead of burning, but im keeping bunring because it's funny as shit😭
DISCLAIMER! No, i don't care who you ship, it's just that if it becomes canon... Thats gonna be a problem and ruin both of their characters writing.
Also with Vox x Alastor, I would rather have that become canon than Radioapple, and I dont even like it either because again, TOXIC. But Radiostatic has more character depth and it makes much more sense than Radioapple EVER COULD.
We already know that Lucifer HATES ALL sinners, how do we know this? The episode where Lucifer first came to the hotel and he literally explained that you cannot expect good deeds to come out from them, so why would he ever want to date THE MAN WHO TRIED TO MANIPULATE HIS FUCKING DAUGHTER?! And Alastor canonically HATES CHARLIE, so why would he go and date her father who is the KING OF HELL. It just doesn't make sense if the literal king of hell went for a sinner who wants to manipulate his daughter and only sees what shes doing as a joke, and completely ignore that he misses his wife?
And Lucifer already misses Lillith but this is sorta me reassuring myself so yeah. And Alastor? If he were in a romantic relationship, he would only be in one for his own personal gain and likely manipulate his partner and be extremely toxic to them, and considering the time period Alastor was from? I dont necessarily think he would even consider being with a man either.
And the Valentines merch stuff was likely just to bait the Radioapple fans into buying ts. And I really hate the fact that Vivziepop is literally gatekeeping about Alastor being AroAce, because it's fucking obvious that he is, she just doesn't want to say he is because of how bad SOME Radioapple shippers can even get. I understand the concept of these two being sorta cute together, but if you're reading this and completely disagreeing with what im saying because it's a 'cute' couple, be logical and actually pay attention to what im saying because I've had a point, and I am just re-phrasing of what I've seen a lot of posts about as well.
And no, Alastor is not a wittle lovey dovey man who wants to give all the kisses to Lucifer because they're so cute! NO. He is a sinister, narcissistic and sadistic man who would rather be subjected to public humiliation than do that despite how big this mans ego is. Wanna know why? BECAUSE👏THE👏SHIP👏DOESN'T👏MAKE👏ANY👏SENSE. And likely made by people who love mischaracterisation!
"There's enemies to lovers though!" Not everything has to be that way. People see 2 men who do not like eachother and instantly go "Theyre gay and have a secret crush on eachother!" When that is not the case at all and it's pretty clear from what I've explained so far.
Again, if you're a Radioapple shipper and reading this, I DO NOT CARE ABOUT WHAT YOU DO. I am simply explaining how much of a problem it would be if it actually became canon, which I am worried it will be canon for the sake of Alastor and Lucifers writing.
hazbin hotel smut | human!alastor x reader one-shot
summary: Alastor prided himself as being a man of great care - from having polished his appearance to please the folks on the street or charming his producers at the station, down to making sure nobody would ever think to suspect him of doing any sort of unsavoury business. So, how did he allow this slip up? It was no fault of his, certainly!
content & warnings: ~4,9k words, smut with afab!reader // porn with accidentally too much plot, mentions of blood, non sex-repulsed!alastor, dry-humping, fingering, p in v, alastor being terrible at dealing with feelings, alastor being alastor and doing alastor things
author's note: so, um. hello. this was written in one and a half nights so my friend had something to read during class or whatever, so bear with me here. this is also my first x reader fic that i did not even plan on writing, but i had to get this idea out of my system to get back on my main projects. so, i'll uh... just leave this here. for you. ~xoxo
Alastor prided himself as being a man of great care - from having polished his appearance to please the folks on the street or charming his producers at the station, down to making sure nobody would ever think to suspect him of doing any sort of unsavoury business.
So, how did he allow this slip up? It was no fault of his, certainly!
Alastor had been busy tonight. He told you he would be going out to a speakeasy, at the explicit invitation of Mimzy - it would be the first big gig she performed there, and she was very persistant to get him to attend her grande première.
She invited you, too - of course she did - not wanting you to miss out on it, either. "It'll be a blast, I tell ya!" she woould claim like every time. "Lotsa people to get drunk with, lotsa high up people, too! That ain't gonna be ya usual shindig, missy. You gotta get out, dance some!"
Mimzy promised you the night of your life in her usual exaggerated and rhapsodic and very Mimzy-fashion. And yet, appealing as she made it out to be, you declined. You had to - you had an interview earlier that day and a possible lookout for a long term job.
God knows you needed it.
Since your father had been let go from his previous job, he was at home, lamenting. You did not blame him, his blues and melancholy forced him into passiveness. Your mother was devoted to take up work instead while also keeping the house from falling apart completely. It had been a rough few years, just trying to make ends meet.
You had to help them out somehow, and Alastor - bless him - had recommended you to a friend of his mother's who was looking for a maid. He could not do the work himself, neither having the time nor the capability as a veteran from the Great War.
While you were hesitant at first, Alastor promised you could trust him not to blab that you were working for him - it may not be prohibited by law for a woman on her own to be working nowadays, but with her mother in the same household? That could get them in a lot of trouble.
But as Mimzy pouted and pleaded with you to come, you eventually caved, and told her you would think about it. That seemed to appease her a bit, and she stopped her nagging. Truth be told, you had no intention of coming that night, the anxiety in anticipation of the interview had kept you up all week.
But, oh, you landed it! How joyous you were, and how kind this friend had been - you had stayed the rest of the day at his house, familiarising yourself with the tasks he would give you.
You just had to share the good news with Alastor, after all - he had played a big part in introducing you to your new employer. So, you had gone to the club where Mimzy was performing, grateful as you were, knowing Alastor had gone there without you.
However, when you did get there, Alastor was nowhere to be found.
You asked around, and Mimzy, in all her beautifully fetching glory, may have had a glass too much to drink in celebration of tonight, and let it slip where he had gone to; some lonesome cabin down the bayou. It sounded strange to you, but Alastor was also a strange man - perfect as he was - and you thought no further than that.
Perhaps you should have.
The bayou was both beautiful and haunting at night, some fireflies and crickets spending you some company on the otherwise rather gloomy trail that led you there. It was a shabby little thing; you would have walked past it were it not for the candle light flickering from a gap in the windows.
You didn't know why Alastor had left the party so early; usually, he would be one of the last to leave the floor, either having Mimzy or you on his arm and making sure you two got home alright. But he has had his plans made for the night when he thought you would not show anymore, and this 'gentleman' kept bothering dear Mimzy when she should be focusing on being the star of the night.
Finding an excuse to lure his victims away from the crowd inside was easy enough when they have had too much champagne; chasing them through the bayou and dragging them here was another thing. Not too mention all the preparations he had to do for the ritual, tracing the circle time and again. He knew it from heart by now.
But then the cabin door opened, and you gasped at the bloody sight.
Alastor froze mid-drag, his head lifting to find - you.
His fingers dug into the arms of his victim, the ever-present smile on his face twitching for just a fraction of a second before composing it again, though it did not quite reach his eyes this time. The panic in them was apparent; something you failed to pick up on in light of this.
"Oh dear..." Alastor chuckled, wiping his forehead with the back of his hand as he straightened up. "What an unfortunate time to drop by."
He tilted his head slightly as if considering how to salvage this - if this was salvagable, indeed - the body at his feet was very much not a part of their usual banter. "How did you know where to find me?"
But you could only watch with awfully wide eyes, those welling up when you could not tear away from the bloodied corpse. Panic rose quickly to your chest, your breath catching. You reached back for the door knob for support, lest you stumbled, knuckles turning white around it. You froze up.
Alastor noticed, and his eyes narrowed on you; he was assessing you like you were a frightened animal - which you were, to him.
"Mimzy told you, didn't she?" He asked, carefully stepping around the body. He had to keep talking to you, to keep you with him before you could do something stupid. He clicked his tongue. "That hoofer - I'll need to have a stern talking with her when we're done here."
And it was working - you perked up at his voice. You knew you should not wait for him to catch you, you should be long gone by now. Your grip around the door knob tightened at his advance, yet something kept you from moving further.
His usually placid expression had changed, the edges around his dark eyes replaced with something you could only describe as predatory, so different from how you knew him to be; courteous and kind, so breezy that he had easily swept you off of your feet when the two of you met for the first time. It was an uncanny transformation.
"Now, now, darling, there's no reason to be upset," Alastor went on to soothe you, but under his shoe, the floorboard creaked, and you flinched. Your mind was catching up to the sceneplaying out in front of you, and your fingers finally twisted the door knob.
That was when Alastor bolted forward. He could not let you get away and risk telling someone.
Alastor had you trapped, and as gently as he could, he cradled your face in his hands to finally make you look at him; finally tear your gaze away from the body behind him. Hurting you now would achieve nothing, nor did he want to. You were his friend - a friend - who had somehow wormed its way into his heart.
But you closed your eyes.
Perhaps it was the way he noticed just how pretty you were in moments like these, when you were so close, and he could study your face and thoughts without anyone catching on. It was fascinating how someone so delicate-looking could ever think he was, too.
But his heart was a rotten apple - you would be sick if you ever tried it.
He had been foolish to think he could keep something so momentous from you, when you had a knack for getting under his skin in the best and worst ways; when you were the only one who had been told of his past, and his dearest Ma. It would have slipped sooner or later.
You raised your hands, your fingers dragging over the bones of his wrists, before your palms pressed against the back of his hands. Your clasp was tight, tense. He only now noticed the tears in your eyes, and his thumb brushed away those that rolled down; the blood from his hands staining your cheeks instead.
A fair trade, Alastor acknowledged. "Shh, shh... easy now," he murmured in that honeyed voice of his. "You don't need to cry. This isn't about you."
Perhaps it was the way he noticed just how pretty you were, or perhaps it was the way you whimpered when your eyes finally opened again, a deep furrow between your brows, and you looked at him like he could save you now, despite everything. That you still trusted him to do so.
That you saw not the rotten skin of the apple, but the seeds of something that was still good within him.
Alastor was bloody, too, and you were daunted to think how much of it was from the corpse on the floor, and how much of it was his own. His slender fingers were all bloody...
"Look at me. Look at me."
And you kept looking at him - just like he said - as his other hand reached for the door knob - not to slam it shut , not yet - but just resting there. He could see the questions reflecting in your eyes, the growing terror and confusion. He leaned closer, your faces only inches apart now as he whispered to you like a lover.
"Trust me," he pleaded, his fingers tracing down your jaw and neck. It was poison.
You tried to slow your breathing, tried to focus only on Alastor. Your foreheads touched, nose brushing against his cheek and your breath fanning over his skin.
Alastor felt the change, the steady relaxation of your muscles beneath his touch. He gently tilted your chin up to better look at you, his eyes roaming over your features. He could see the conflict there, the battle between the girl he had come to know and the horror of what she had just witnessed.
"That's it, just breathe," he murmured, encouraging. "Just like that."
His hand at the door slowly pushed it shut with a soft click, the world outside now shut out and leaving only the two of you in this grim tableau.
You nodded faintly - you could feel his glasses on your face, the way he was holding you was strangely intimiate, all things considered.
Alastor's smile widened slightly, the tension in his own shoulders easing as he pulled back and watched you respond so well to him. His fingers trailed down from your cheek to trace the line of your jaw again - slow, deliberate.
"There we go," he cooed. "That's it."
The praise is light, his voice almost playful. He leaned back in, enough for his lips to brush against yours when he spoke next - a ghost of a kiss more than anything real.
"Tell me you understand... that some things are better left unsaid?"
You were very tempted to kiss him. Whether that be genuine or just to cope with yourself from the situation at present, the urge was there.
You shook your head in denial, whispering against his lips over and over. "Why would you do that? Why would you do that?"
Your soft breath against his skin was like a caress, sending a tingle down his spine. He could feel the heat of your body against his, the way your fingers still gripped him so tightly - as if clinging to him for comfort.
His thumb brushed across your lips, shushing your protest. "Because sometimes, my dear, people need to learn a lesson." Alastor pulled back to look you in the eyes, his gaze dark and intense. "And I am the teacher."
Your breath caught.
You did not know what to do, just looking at him while also grappling with the fact that you did not seem to know Alastor at all.
You nodded once, faintly.
He saw the fear in your eyes, the tremble of your lips that you could not quite suppress, and a part of him relished it. Not because he enjoyed seeing you scared, but because you were finally seeing all of him.
Alastor ran his knuckles over your cheek, almost tenderly, smearing more of the blood from his hand onto your skin.
"You won't tell anyone, will you, darling?" he asked, his tone soft, almost teasing you. "We don't want to ruin our little friendship, do we?"
Your lips parted, wanting to tell him that no, you would tell someone, that you would go to the police and tell them-
But at the same time, you knew you could not bring yourself to do so. Alastor knew that, too.
He smirked as he watched your warring emotions play out right in front of him like cards to read. He could practically see your thoughts, the struggle between doing what was right and keeping quiet to preserve what they had. And he could use that to his advantage.
His hand moved to gently caress your cheek, his thumb softly tracing the path of your tears. He took a step back, finally putting some space between you, but his eyes never left you.
You were cold without him close anymore, awkwardly standing there with that little bit of distance between you, longing for him again.
You both looked to the corpse on the side.
Alastor's gaze flicked there, as if it were just another piece of furniture in the room. The nonchalance with which he treats this murder was both impressive and disturbing at the same time.
He looked back at you, foot nudging the limp shoulder.
"A bit of a mess, isn't it?" he asked lightly, as if he was discussing a spilled drink. You did not respond.
Not like you knew what to say to that, anyway. Your face was stained from where his bloody hands had touched you - your cheeks, your neck, your lips. Your fingers were a little bloody, too, from when you had touched him.
You still looked teary-eyed as you watched that lifeless corpse, a little lost on what to do with yourself here.
Alastor titled his head, studying the way you trembled. It was amusing to him.
"You look a mess, darling," he purred, reaching out to thumb at the streaks on your cheeks in an attempt to get it off before chuckling under his breath. "But I suppose that can't be helped now."
He walked over to a wooden table nearby, where a rag and bucket already sat waiting - for him. He dunked the cloth in the water with an almost careless flair before offering it to her, adjusting his glasses. "Wouldn't want anyone seeing you like this, would we?"
You stared at him blankly, but accepted the cloth from him.
Alastor watched you. You were shaking slightly, and there was a tremble in your fingers as you dragged it over your skin, wetting your clothes in the process. Despite it all, you were still standing there, still trusting him. What a sight for god you were, covered in his sin.
"Clean yourself up," he instructed, fiddling with the cuff links of his shirt and realising that it had torn when hassling with the rat that now lay on the floor - bled out. He scowled, trying to fix it. "We need to have a little chat, my dear."
You only managed to nod, your heart beating loud in your ears.
You were wiping your hand with the cloth, trying to get all that blood off, but your hands were just shaking too much, only succeeding in smearing it further.
Alastor sighed loudly as if this was all just a minor inconveniece to him rather than the life-altering horror it should be - what it was to you. He stepped forward, standing close to you again, and took your trembling hand in his own.
"Let me," he said sharply. "You're making such a mess of yourself."
His fingers were deft as they wrapped around your wrist, guiding the rag over your skin with slow, decisive strokes. It was almost tender - if ignoring the fact that he was wiping away evidence of his crime. "There we go... much better," he said, handing you back the rag. "Now then... about what you saw tonight..."
Alastor looked at you, pointedly.
"You won't tell anyone," he said, and you could feel the atmosphere shift into something colder and darker. That playful lilt was gone now; he was not asking. "Because if you do..."
He trailed off. The message was coming across, an implication should suffice and was perhaps even more efficient in terrifying than anything he could have described, if you had to fill in the blanks of what he was capable of doing. His smile returned in full as he patted your cheek.
"But of course you wouldn't! We're friends!"
You flinched, your hand touching that spot on your cheek as Alastor turned away to return to the table. You still held the damp cloth.
But Alastor could not bear to look at you for any longer, the image of you was now forever burned into his memory; if he did, he did not know what he would be compelled to do. You looked like a lost lamb in the den of a wolf, so vulnerable - and so beautiful with it. Even covered in blood, he could not deny how good you looked like that. It suited you in an odd way.
His back was turned to you, hunching over the table as he busied himself, or tried to at least - he did not know what he was doing. He had a ritual to tend to, and a demon to summon.
Busy as he was making himself out to be, you would hear Alastor's huffing, would see the way he gripped the edge of the table to lean on. You joined him there, slowly letting the now-dirty cloth drop back into the bucket with a splash. You were hesitating. Alastor glanced at you.
Your wide eyes, how you looked at him, the blood... that you knew, and that you were staying here. He could not stop thinking about any of it, no matter how hard he tried. Your trembling; chewing on your bottom lip in contemplation of what to do - your fingers curling into the bloodied rag, too, before letting it go! This was never for you to see.
"Alastor?"
He did not hesitate - he did not think at all - that the second your lips parted to form his name, Alastor kissed you. His hands cupped your face, and he kissed you like a man starved for it, his mouth crashing onto yours. He was much less gentle than at the door.
And you were stunned by the sudden kiss, though perhaps you had expected it and that was why you had approached him there. You froze up like a fawn, like you had before, but for a different reason altogether now - you were not terrified this time, simply surprised. Pure, simple surprise that made your hands tentatively come to rest on his arms before gripping them tightly, and pulling him closer.
You did not pull away.
His tongue pressed insistently into your mouth, trapping you against the closest thing. He was all over you - everywhere - surrounding you, overwhelming you. A hand in your hair, another on your hip as Alastor urged you into exactly the position he wanted you in - sat upon the table, his body between your thighs.
You felt the edge press uncomfortably into your calves, but Alastor was taking up too much of you to really care. He was rough, hungry, his fingers digging into your skin.
You were both just heat and breathless want.
You drifted one hand higher, cupping the back of his neck.
How long you had wanted to kiss him, you had completely forgotten, and it was silly to think of now. A kind of heartbreak that it had to happen under these circumstances.
Alastor could feel your response, the way you yielded to him so easily. For all the horror you must be feeling in this moment, you were still here, still kissing him back with just as much fervour. You were so soft and so sweet and so perfect, a part of him felt almost guilty.
But his hand moved down, gripping under your knee and hauling your leg up around his waist to bring her even closer to him. Their hips ground together as his mouth moved down to your neck.
You furrowed your brows, a quiet gasp falling from your lips.
Alastor's arousal was undeniable, and for a brief but horrifying moment you wondered just how much was you and how much was the blood.
You did not dwell on it too long; he bit down on the spot just under your jaw, his breath hot against your skin as he panted, murmuring between kisses and grazes of teeth.
"Let me touch you," he begged. "Let me have you."
He was so needy, so desperate like you have never seen him before. This was not the smooth and collected Alastor you have come to know.
You were trembling, nodding faintly to give permission. "Yes."
It all happened so quickly, then.
His fingers found their way under your skirt, slipping past your underwear with impatience. You fumbled with his belt, freeing him the same way.
With a hand at the nape of his neck, your lips crashed together again.
The kiss only deepened as his fingers dipped between your folds and worked you with raw need. He could feel how wet you were, how ready, and a low groan sounded in his throat as his slacks pooled at his feet.
Alastor broke the kiss for only a second, his arms hooking under your thighs - just long enough to hoist you closer to the edge of the table - with a clatter of bits'n'bobs rolling and falling off. But his eyes were locked onto you, dark and hungry.
Then he pushed into you, burying his face in your neck.
You groaned against his lips as he filled you, feeling that delicious burn as he forced your walls to stretch around him.
You leaned back against the wall, holding onto Alastor's shoulder.
He groaned against your neck, his hips grinding against you before they began moving at a steady pace - rough, erratic thrusts that knocked the breath out of you. His fingers dug into your thighs as he held you in place. "Fuck."
His lips find yours again in a messy kiss, all teeth and tongue, as if trying to swallow and lap up every sound you made. He felt drunk - the way you were clinging to him was intoxicating. All the charm that came with being a radio host was gone now, and not even the brutality of a butcher that had been terrorizing New Orleans remained. He just looked desperate.
Your grip on his shoulder is tight, pulling him closer against you. You needed to feel him more.
The table was shaking under you with every thrust, and you met his pace with each roll of your own.
It was all quick an messy; no thoughts, no words.
Alastor was lost in you - nothing else existed in this moment but you, and he forget what he was, what he had done; forgot that there was a body waiting to be chopped up. He did not care anymore. Nothing else mattered but having you with him, being given your heart and body. And if he took a bit of that innocence along the way, then that was just the price to pay for this kind of bliss.
His hands were gripping under your thighs, pulling you closer and pushing himself deeper, the head of his cock repeatedly bullying that spot inside you that made you see white.
You clenched around around him as his fingers joined between your bodies, your orgasm washing over you as you tilted your head back, and triggered his own.
His breathing was ragged now; the need for air finally catching up to the both of you.
It took a few seconds for Alastor to come back to himself. But then the smell of death and blood wafting up from the floor jolted him back to the harsh reality. The body. The body was still in here, and it was in here with you. Alastor quickly looked back at you, at your blissed out expression as you caught your own breath.
He took a deep, shaky breath. He knew you will never look at him the same, that any innocence that was left had now been stripped away.
Your chest was heaving, completely undone.
Your breath came out ragged and panting, your back leaning against the wall behind you while staying seated on the table, Alastor between your legs...
... but the reality of your situation slowly dawned on you, too, and when Alastor saw that happening, his hands slowly released your thighs; fingers ghosting across the imprints he had made.
He took a moment to look at you again - really look at you. You were flushed and dishevelled, marked in all the places he had touched and kissed you. You looked beautiful like this. Completely undone by him. He could not look away for a beat.
But he pulled away from you, tucking himself back into his trousers as he gave himself a second to collect himself.
You did the same, sliding off of the table and pushing down your skirt. There was not much to do about your hair, or the blood Alastor had smeared on you again during the act.
You slowly came to stand next to him, looking down at the corpse at your feet with him.
Alastor glanced at you. Something about it - the way you were still so neat and proper even after everything that had just happened - it irritated him to no end. He could still taste your lips on his, still feel your body against his. So how dare you look so untouched? So pure for having just let him defile you.
"What do we do now?" you whispered to him, your voice urgent. You looked to him for guidance.
Comfort. Safety.
Alastor pinched the bridge of his nose, exhaling - almost a laugh, but not quite.
"Now?" He tilted his head at you, amused by how she looked to him for answers like some kind of saint instead of the monster that was really standing in front of her. "Now you walk out that door and pretend this never happened."
"What?"
Your eyes went wide; you could barely believe what you were hearing. But Alastor cocked an eyebrow at you, his smile widening.
"I said, you are going to walk out of here and pretend that you never saw a thing. This never happened, and our little friendship can continue unhindered."
His irritation began to show now, like you were being willfully obtuse, or slow. He hated having to explain something that seemed so obvious to him. The sudden burst of passion had served as a temporary distraction. Nice, but temporary.
"Our..." you could not even bring yourself to say it, and just looked away. You nodded, resigned. "Okay."
Alastor's grin faltered for a second time this night. His hand lifted as if to touch you again, then stopped halfway. Regret crossed his face before it was gone again, and he recovered, chuckling as if this was some joke you were not in on.
"Darling," he drawled, tilting his head in mockery. "I just had you on a table where a corpse is rotting barely two feet away - and you're hung up on a word? Priorities!"
Your face flushed hot at his words, both upset and embarrassed.
You turned to leave like he told you to, opening the door - but you stayed there for a moment, not looking at him when you spoke.
"You didn't have to do that to get my compliance, by the way," she told him - her tone bitter and her intentions petty. "I wouldn't have said anything, either way."
With that confession lingering between them, you went.
Alastor looked after you, his lips turning into a thin line. For a long moment, he just stared at the door you had just walked through, simply... leaving. "... I know," he grumbled quietly.
Then his head snapped back toward the table with a sudden violence, and his hand reached for his knife as he stormed out after her, and into the night.
The cabin door slammed shut behind him.
───── the dividers were made by me, please do not use them on your works without my explicit permission // header pictures were found on pinterest
Alastor x Reader (green stitches.....) FEM!READER, MALE!READER WILL BE LINKED
SMUTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT
cw: riding, lazy/slow sex, al is a fucking masochist, cumming inside, warming, mild medical play
a/n guys holy shit episode FOUR WHAT A GOOD DAY TO BE AN ALASTOR STAN!!!!!!!!!! also i dont care that he's ace/aro. my barbie and his barbie are being mashed together. for the record though, ace/aro folk rock. i just yk. need to fuck the cannibal deer man. and i love that hes canonically ace/aro bc it causes more interesting narrative things, but for my purposes everyone wants me carnally.
SEASON TWO EPISODE FOUR SPOILERS
hes so fine- WHO SAID THAT
Alastor is hunched over his vanity smoking and drinking. It's rare he does both- he's known to indulge occasionally but to need it? It's clear Adam fucked him up- alot.
The stitches you put in last week are tearing- the magic fading and sparking. He looks to you, his bangs cling to his face, he exhales a cloud of smoke. The pain and blood loss make his eyes crazed. "Your stitches..... are faulty." Garbled static scratches along his voice almost like desperation. You smirk, even when seconds from collapsing his pride is his priority.
He shuffles to a chair and collapses into it, legs apread wide. "fuck." He groans, chest rising and falling unsteadily, he takes a long drag from his cigarette, whiskey sloshing in his glass. "come here."
You step to him and chuckle, you use your nail to cut your non-dominant hand open, plucking your bone needle from your hand. You yank a strand of your hair out and thread the needle, then you move to straddle him.
He sighs in what you'd call relief. Alastors always had a strange reaction to pain, he's half hard beneath you. He grinds up into you without much care- mostly enjoying the friction but not chasing anything. "You're a fool" You murmur as you cut the fading stitches.
"Shut up." His head tips back- giving you a better angle. "Just do your job." You huff a soft laugh and watch as he drinks from his glass, throat bobbing. You refill his glass without him asking- then pluck the cigarette from his hand and take a drag. Your eyes shut and you hold the smoke in for a few seconds before blowing it at him, he laughs. You flick ash onto his stomach, his abs twitch. "enough" He grumbles, the radio to your left flashes as he speaks through it.
"alright, alright." You roll your hips and a staticky groan emerges from the radio's speakers. You press the bone needle to the skin and start to sew. The cut is rough, festering from his refusal to rest, at the very least it's scabbing though. You hum as you tug your stiches to close the skin.
Music plays in the background as Alastor lets himself relax and bask in the buzz from the pain, booze, and nicotine combined. You can't help but laugh as he plays 'The Masochism Tango', though it is fitting. You hum along, hips rolling into his dick- which is fully hard beneath you. You lean forward and press kisses to his neck, nipping as you sew him up. He groans low in his throat and the track on the radio stumbles. "You're such a-" you press against the cut and he moans.
"hush" You murmur, grinding your clit into his dick. Finally his chest is stitched again- neat sutures hiding the wound. You press a kiss to each stich and he whimpers- Alastor fucking whimpers. You tag another drag of the cigarette and lean forward, kissing him and passing the smoke to him. He moans and laughs, smoke flowing from his mouth with each breath. "Oh love," He laughs, eyes shutting.
You lift your hips up slightly to unzip his fly and pull his dick out. You shift your panties to the side grind against his cock. He makes a strangled noise. "Ah- ah-" He trembles. "You're divine as always." you snort and slowly sink down onto him.
The radio to your left explodes, his claws sink into your hips. "fuck!" His chest rises and falls rapidly, eyes wide open, dials spinning. You whine as you sit flush with him- your slick dripping down his cock onto his pants. "ah-" You chuckle and silence him by putting the cigarette into his mouth.
You roll your hips and his eyes flutter shut- music playing again. You hear his whiskey glass shatter on the ground, he take the cigarette from his mouth and cups your nape, pulling you flush to him. His bloody hand comes to his mouth, lapping at his fingers. You clench around him and your clit throbs. You roll your hips again and he growls. "Enough of your teasing." He snarls, "Move properly."
You consider continuing to tease- but you press kisses to his throat and start to ride him, pushing yourself up enough to then sink onto him. "ah- that's it. Atta girl" He groans, static creeping into his voice. You start to ride him properly.
His tip hits your g-spot cruelly, you make punched out sounds with each hit. "ah- fuck- Al-"
"atta girl- don't stop now." He snarls, starting to pistion his hips up into you, the new angle making you see stars. One of his tendrils moves to your clit and you sob. Tears well up in your eyes and roll down your cheeks. "Oh fuck- oh fuck" You whimper. He chuckles and kisses the tears.
"fuck- ah- haa" He can't help but laugh, you feel fucking incredible around him. Sappy cunt sucking him in desperately, he can feel every twitch of you around him and fuck-
He hugs you tighter to him as he starts to pant harshly, animalistically. "Fuck- ah- shit-" He yanks you down until his cock is flush with your cervix and he cums with a staticky shout. He yanks you into a kiss- he tastes like whiskey, smoke, and static. You moan into his mouth as he floods you with his cum, the tendril on your clit speeds up just slightly and you cum with a sob. "Ah! ah god- fuck al please i- ah-"
His head tips back, body going slack while you go slack on his chest. his arm wraps around your shoulders and pulls you closer. you arms wrap around his waist. Its terribly romantic, intimate. The closeness makes you drowsy- Alastor has never been into PDA so these moments are your favorite with him. WHen he shows you just how much he cares.
You drift, cozy in Alastors lap, cum and softened dick still inside you. And for the first time since Adam, Alastor looks relaxed.
God hes so fucking hot i need him so badly oh my fucking god its not even FUNNY
I feel like I'm pulling a CoryxKenshin by leaving for 9 months, promoting something and then leaving for another 2 just to apologise about it after... Guys, if I am im really sorry
(Before you guys come at me, I've been a cory fan for at least 8 years, I'm just not glazing him bc his communication with us has been HORRIBLE)
This joke is gonna be so shit but I went to go get the milk (cringes)
Can I have human Alastor x reader smut n like they’re both virgins n it’s their wedding night like newly weds n he eats her out for first time n they fuccccc n like super fluffy n hand holding n i love yous n both are nervous n shy n adorable pleeeeeaaaase im begging
I almost missed this request but its so cute!!!!
You looked at yourself in the mirror, trying to get your nerves together.
You had changed into a short silk nightie. Your lacy garters clung to your plush thighs, holding up the thigh highs. You had pulled your robe over it and took a deep breathe.
Tonight was the night.
You had just married the man of your dreams.
The wedding and reception was beautiful; your families danced, sang and drank to their hearts content.
Your aunties had teased you about your wedding night, making rather vulgar comments about how exciting your night was going to be. Your mother had snuck and packed lingerie into your luggage for this moment.
”Oh honey that man there? I know you’re gonna have a wild night.”
”Youre gonna be giving us some little ones by the time y’all come back”
”dearest remember men like it when you do…”
”Oh I can’t to hear everything when you get back”
You had half a mind to change and just put on one of your nightgowns, but you wanted to be sexy.
It was your wedding night after all.
And you wanted to look good for your husband.
You gathered your nerves and made your way to the living room.
Alastor wasn’t there.
You padded over and poked your head into the kitchen and found the man pouring himself a drink.
”mind pouring me one on the rocks?” You said, making him turn around at the sound of your voice.
Heat pumped to your cheeks as his eyes widened, you held your giggle as you made your way to stand in front of him.
You feigned innocence as you wrapped your arms around his neck, sighing as he kissed your forehead and handing you a glass of whiskey.
You took a sip, nose scrunching at the taste but smiled as Alastor clinked his glass with yours.
”To us my dear” he said chugging the liquor. You giggled and really took in your surroundings.
You hopped on the kitchen island and sighed “I can’t believe we are married. Oh my stars Alastor we-were really married” you covered your smiling face, feet swaying.
Alastor let out a laugh, coming to stand between your thighs, hands on your waist, smiling at you “yes we are. And I am the happiest man alive doll”
He caught sight of the sheer material on your foot, his brow quirked, making you smile slightly. His hands fingered with the knot of your robe, loosening it and his jaw went slack.
”My momma seems to want us to give her grandbabies soon as possible” you giggled as he toyed with the garter, trailing his finger along your skin.
“That can certainly be arranged” he mumbled to himself, opening the robe to see what you were hiding .
Alastor felt heat rush straight to his cock as he took you in;
The silk garment clung to your figure, hugging your soft curves and making your skin look so soft, your garters teasing him, making him want to use his teeth to rip it off.
You looked gorgeous.
His fingers tapped along your skin, he pushed his hips into the counter as he leaned into you, burying his face in your neck.
The entirety of your courtship Alastor had been a gentleman and did not even try to indulge in you.
Sure there was heavy petting and intense kissing…
but this oh this was different
The two of you were married now.
It was now acceptable and even encouraged that the two of you would be connected at the hip.
Large hands danced along your thighs and slipped under your nightie to follow the garter straps.
A low groan met your ears as Alastor’s fingers dug into your soft flesh, his teeth nipped at your ear ”No panties doll? Oooh my dear always a vixen”
Your cheeks heat up as you feel his thumb graze the slit of your soft lips, rubbing soft circles on your clit.
”A-Al?” You whined as he littered your neck and shoulder in kisses, nipping at the delicate flesh as his thumb pressed onto the bud that made you tingle.
He hummed before pulling you closer to the edge of the island “how lucky am I to have such a pretty wife?” He drawled, taking his free hand and hooking his finger under your chin and pressing his lips to yours.
”A pretty wife I adore, worship, and would do anything for.”
You keened as he deepened the kiss, head dizzy with pleasure.
Alastor pulled away and chuckled at your lidded dazed eyes.
You let out a squeal as he heaved you over his shoulder and made his way through the estate. Your breath caught in your throat as you watch your husband remove his shirt, leaving his chest bare.
Your husband was not a very large man no, instead he was tall and lanky. Lean muscle rippled under his flesh and you bit your lips as your eyes roamed over the scars that littered his skin.
Heat pulsed between your legs.
Alastor caught you ogling and flashed you a smile as he crouched between your legs.
Your nerves twisted as he nuzzled the skin of your thigh
“We don’t have to do anything if you don’t want darlin” he reassured you, running his hands over your legs.
“N-No its okay. I ju- i want to experience the whole wedding night thing. And with you. I want us to explore this new thing together.” You tried to focus else where, pouting, making him smile.
Contrary to what many people thought, Alastor, the dazzling radio host, was not as experienced as one would think.
Not a womanizer, though he looked like it. The old handsome bastard
Alastor slithered up your body, grabbing your hand and intertwining your fingers, bringing your hand to his lips, thumb fiddling with your shiny wedding band.
”If I do anything that makes you uncomfortable just tell me and we can stop ok?” He said with a serious look.
You nodded and pulled his head to yours, connecting your lips. You wrapped your arms around his neck, scratching his scalp and massaging his bare shoulders.
The two of you just stayed like that; happily sucking at each other faces, tongues sweeping over each other and pecking lips.
Alastor nipped at your swollen lips, nudging your chin to expose your neck to him ”I want to try something dearest” he said softly, making you tilt your head.
He slide down until he was kneeling on the floor, his hands on top of your thighs and head wedged between your legs.
You watch his head dip under your nightie and tensed up feeling his breath on your mound.
He brushed his nose against your clit, mouth ghosting over your slit. Your lips formed an ‘O’ as he wrapped his lips around your clit and sucked!
”Oh!” You gasped, back arching.
Alastor’s tongue swirled around the bud, alternating between licking and sucking on the bud.
His tongue dipped down to tease your quivering hole.
”A-Al!?” You whimpered, hands fisting the covers.
The man propped your legs atop his broad shoulders to angle you better, to slot his mouth against your cunt.
His hands gripped your waist to keep you from withering away from him.
The sound soft suckling and your gasps filled the room.
With a slight pop, Alasto released your throbbing clit and licked a strip up your slit.
He let out a chuckle “Ooh ma cherie you taste as sweet as I always thought” he lifted his head and smiled at you, chin glistening in your juices.
Your face was flushed as you panted. Your fingers pulled at your nightie until the garment was tossed to the side, leaving you bare and only in your stockings.
Alastor’s cock twitched at the sight of your full, perky tits.
He shimmied out of his loose pants, climbing up your body to capture your lips. His hands pulled your legs around his waist as he grinded his hard cock into your wet heat.
You moaned into his mouth as you lifted your hips into his, clit catching onto the tip of his clothed cock.
”A-Al i want…I want to please you as well”
He hummed as his drifted towards your chest, teeth tugging at your nipples before enveloping the mound into his mouth.
You lightly pushed against him to sit up. Lips never parting, you fondled his cock, bristling as he groaned into your mouth and cock hardening within your hand.
”I-Inside p-please Al” you begged, pressing your head against his.
It wasn’t as easy as your aunties had tried to tell you. The magazines made it look easy, but by god!
Your eyes clenched as you gritted your teeth, taking his weeping tip and running it over your folds. Alastor held your hips, kissing your shoulders “darlin don’t force yourself…we can take it as slow as you need” he reassured.
A whimper met his ears and he let out a hiss as your tight warm walls sunk down on him, stopping just shy when met with resistance.
You took a deep breath as you plunged down, a cry leaving your throat “Aaah!”
You buried your face the groove of his neck, nails biting into his skin leaving angry marks.
You felt so full.
It was like you could barely breath, his cock filled every crevice and stretched you beyond limits.
Your fingers never felt like this.
You needed to move, to adjust and get accustomed to him being inside.
Your teeth found themselves bedded into Alastor’s flesh as you finally took the last few inches.
Your sweet husband made sure to soothe you, kissing you cheeks and lips, lavishing your chest in kisses as well, muttering positive affirmations.
”Oh my sweet girl”
”Youre doing so well”
”deep breaths baby, I got ya”
After a while, you let out a shaky moan as Alastor softly kneaded your flesh, before rolling his hips into yours. He groaned as you clenched around him, pupils dilating.
”I-I know we said we would go slow but my god cher, you feel so good”
He took it upon himself to slowly move you. Alastor had heard from other men that a woman’s pussy was like heaven on earth. He used to think they were exaggerating, but your warm, gummy walls hugged him perfectly.
He had been hard since he had tasted his wife.
You were sweeter than any fruit he’s tasted. He would live between your thighs if he could.
He peppered your shoulder in kisses as he grinded into your heat.
”A-Al!” You whined, body buzzing with pleasure.
Soft moans and grunts filled the room as the two of you made love for the first time.
”Please Al oh my god please!” You moaned throwing your head back against the bed. Alastor was on top of you, head buried in your neck, soft grunts and growls pouring from his lips.
”You gonna cum for me baby?” He purred, hips snapping into yours, your legs wrapped around his waist.
You nodded as your cunt fluttered.
Alastor lifted his head to catch your lips, intertwining your hands.
”c-cum!c-cummin oh Oh fuck my god! A-Al..I’m gonna cum” you whimpered as the ball in your belly tightened.
Alastor smiled against your lips “Its okay. Just let it happen baby. C’mon. Cum on your husband’s cock. That’s it…fuck baby”
You saw white as your body seized. Your thighs trembled as you pulsed around his cock, orgasm ripping through you as you milked him of his first orgasm.
”Iloveyouoloveyouiloveyou” you chanted as Alastor rode out your orgasm, humming in amusement at his wife.
You twitched in sensitivity as his thrusts sped up before he stilled, groaning as he emptied his ball into you.
You both panted,chest heaving as you overcame the sensation of passion.
Alastor curled his arms around you, pulling you into his chest. he pressed a soft kiss to your forehead, making you sleepily blink at him
”Was that ok?” He asked nervous
You smiled, pressing a kiss over his heart sighing
”That was perfect”
the two of you sat in bliss, just taking each other in.
”Al?” You muttered, making the man look down at you
”C-Can I suck your cock now?”
That made the man short-circuit.
You looked up when you got no response only to see your husband sporting a nosebleed
WHY IS EVERYONE SHIPPING MYLO AND CLAGGOR????? THEY'RE BROTHERS...
😨 "he's our father too" -ep 3 s1
maybe not blood related, but they are still brothers bc they were both adopted by vander. Please let them be brothers. Don't make it weird pls pls pls if you want some homo action, just look at jayvik or any other pair of 2 men that aren't familial...
I'm on tik tok and I can't stand ppl making Mylo a villain, seeing him as a >>>>>>TEENAGER<<<<<< full of anger who only knows how to talk bad abt powder,I think if Riot had shown more time for Mylo, he wouldn't be evil ALL THE TIME
Have people in this fandom never heard of sibling affection before???
Look at this clip.
Now I'm about to say something completely shocking, so hold onto your hats. Siblings can show affection. Siblings can look at each other lovingly. Siblings can hug each other. Even if they're boys!
There is nothing in this clip that suggests Mylo's doing anything but lovey-dovey-ly watching his crush do her thing, and accepting a hug from his brother. There's nothing to suggest Claggor's doing anything but hugging his brother and encouraging him (in a bit of a teasing way) to pursue this crush.
There's nothing in this clip I wouldn't to with my sister. No "type of look" I wouldn't give her. We're very close and physically affectionate (me especially); it's not at all uncommon for me to hug her for any reason I can find. I think I've done the exact thing Claggor does to Mylo here several times. Because, shock of all shocks, she's my sister and I love her and I'm an affectionate person.
When she's gushing over and staring lovingly at her girlfriend, I look at her with happiness and encouragement (and sometimes a bit of teasing) in my eyes. Because, another shock of all shocks, I love that she's so happy and in love with someone. Seeing her happy makes me happy for her, and sometimes, I want to show that through hugs and happy looks.
So why can't two fictional brothers do the same?
What do you want them to do? Stand five feet apart and give each other approving nods? Fist bump like two fifteen-year-olds who are scared of affection? Do the frat boy hug and give each other the smallest of smiles like true masculine manly men?
I LOVED seeing a physically affectionate hug between two brothers. Pieces of fiction often shy away so much from letting male characters be affectionate with each other, so it was so refreshing to see. Then it was so disheartening to see people immediate dismiss that so they could encourage their (incest) ship.
In a show that is so much about love in all of its forms, why do people take one of the sweetest displays of normal brotherly affection and go "GAY, HOMOEROTIC, THEY'RE IN LOVE"? Just because you aren't the type of person to show sibling affection in this way doesn't mean no one is. Saying that this type of affection can't be anything but romantic is disgusting to someone like me, who regularly shows people affection like this. It tells me that if my sister and I were fictional adoptive sisters, people would ship us. I hate that.
I love ur design for jinxer mylo sm!! It’s literally one of my fav designs of him he looks so cool✨
I was wondering if you have any info or headcanons or fun facts abt that version of him bc he just seems rlly cool and honestly the concept of Mylo being a jinxer has a bunch of potential especially considering his character. If not that’s totally fine tho!!! Keep up the great work 🫶
Thank you so much :D!! I’ve only made 1 HC cuz the purpose of jinxer mylo’s design was for aesthetic purposes. So heres a drawing of the HC :)
- Mylo’s spiked armband (on his left delt) inspired Gert to wear one. She complimented him one day, and he’s been gushing ever since. Couple days later, she fashions the same armband on her right arm.
Hot take: proshitters begone and any Mylo X Claggor shippers on my account
Anyways
I'm gonna cry and I know people have been doing this from the dawn of time but TUMBLR STOP SHOWING ME PEOPLE WHO SHIP MYLOXCLAGGOR FOR FUCKS SAKE, THEY ARE BROTHERS I DONT WANNA SEE THAT NAST SHIT THANK YOU VERY MUCH
I can't see that scene the same anymore at the party in ep 7 with Mylo and Claggor when CLAGGOR LOOKED AT MYLO AND SMIRKED BECAUSE MYLO WAS LOOKING AT GERT. CLAGGOR KNOWS HE LIKES GERT, CLAGGOR DID NOT WANT "that cookie" OR HIM.
IF I SEE ONE MORE "Best ship ever" or "They were meant to be ^^" ON TIKTOK, PINTREST OR TUMBLR I WILL CRY.
I go on Pinterest, type up Mylo, what do I see in the recommendations?? "x Claggor" FUCK OFF. NO. AND THE SAME CREATOR WHO IVE BLOCKED AND DONT WANNA SEE KEEPS ON COMING UP, I DONT WANNA SEE THEM. GET AWAY. NOR THEIR TUMBLR. I USED TO LOVE THEM, BUT AFTER THEY DTARTED THIS??... oh... that's... oh... uhm...🤠... no!...
I miss last year when I started my Arcane hyperfixation and I didn't even think about this ship at all, I want to reach on my brain and get a lobotomy for whatever keeps this in place, make it happen, please, I beg of you.
I feel like this account has just been random shit but yk, a person's gotta do what they gotta do🤷♀️
Side rant over, and honestly I don't really give a shit about what the fuck you do as long as you don't harm people or their brains! I'm gonna ask Pinterest if I can just... Not see that stuff. Please. I'm desperate.
And stop for a moment and think, "Should we go along???" "Should we play it safe?" BUT NAHH LETS MAKE IT WORSER!!
I'm also saying this rn, I seen a person say that they wanna do the yk with the kid version of Mylo. Specifically him... So... Do you wanna tell them or will I because we're not exactly doing much by sitting here now are we?...
If someone shipped me with MY adopted brother just because I hugged him or showed any form of physical touch?? I'd fucking hate it and be disgusted!
